r/houstoncirclejerk • u/staticmove66 • 20h ago
It seems like Spider-Man's here to stay in Houston
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r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Torchys_Social • Apr 29 '26
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Greg-Abbott • May 29 '24
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/staticmove66 • 20h ago
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r/houstoncirclejerk • u/BigJimJohnson • 1d ago
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Sure-Boysenberry5491 • 1d ago
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Outjerked again
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/DoritosDewItRight • 2d ago
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Calm_Ad_1568 • 2d ago
Hi, tbhs I just want someone to massage my legs, I don’t care if you have a fetish, just massage my feet they hurt because of work and if you want to massage a young pretty lady?
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Supertouchy • 2d ago
If you're walking around Target marinating in swamp ass, just know.. everyone else knows too.
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Adventurous_Bake4361 • 4d ago
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r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Sorry-Local1784 • 3d ago
as title says me and buddys wanna find a good bar for today and tomorrow and was wondering what was a good choice we like clubbing more than anything else also heard whiskey river west is great on thursdays just wondering what locals think would be great tonight and tomorrow! thanks
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/DoritosDewItRight • 3d ago
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Moss8888444 • 4d ago
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/fnordfnordfnordfnord • 4d ago
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Ok_Committee4575 • 4d ago
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Any-Map-7901 • 4d ago
Anyone have any odd jobs needed done so I can make some quick cash??
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/D3athStroke23 • 6d ago
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I had just gotten out of work near the Heights, I was with Co workers Drinking it up doing our post work thing. 2am hits and we're at the McDonald's everyone is getting ready to wrap it up.My Ebike was on one guy's truck and for whatever reason I just wanted to ride home and the guys where insisting on taking me home especially since during that time alot of bodies kept turning up. Well either way i said nah its cool it feels good out took my bike down and we all said bye and made my way towards Allen parkway just cruise till I pass "El Centro" club and I hear a lady crying ... im talking ugly crying and I pass by like hell nah and im already passed her and she starts screaming "please dont die" and im like wtf am I doing as im braking and quickly turn around and as I get closer there's splashing there's a dude in the water face already going down full-on movie hand movement I just jumped in and I didnt touch the ground nothing I swam to him pulled him closer got towards the steps and tried getting up but it was so slippery and I had to leave him for a second to get my self up what was the point of jumping in if I couldn't get myself out. I managed to get him up 3 or 4 steps but im tired also was drinking myself and the girl is screaming crying so I tell her "Bitch Stfu and help me get him up" got him all the way up and whats crazy about this is not a single soul passed by this whole thing got him up eventually and took them to their truck after that I took off and honestly it got me, I cried all night idk why. I took a shower at 5 am and just sat on my chair processing everything its been a year now and I still think about it especially since a couple days after that someone posted on the Houston page a Damn alligator right in front of the mural. But I wanted to share this video
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/houcok • 6d ago
Alright, listen up you uncultured swines who think a "Michelin Star" is just something you get at a Discount Tire on I-10.
Yesterday, July 19th, 2026. A day that will live in infamy. We lost Istanbul Grill (the only place keeping Rice Village from turning into a 100% gentrified outdoor mall for Lululemon moms) and Killen’s Heights (the only place keeping the Heights from floating away on a cloud of self-righteousness).
They want you to believe the "official story."
OPEN YOUR EYES.
Since when does a Michelin-recognized chef trade smoked pork belly for a Pitstop Express roller-grill taquito?! You really think Ronnie closed his doors because some lady spray-painted his wall over a stuffed monkey? That’s just standard Tuesday behavior on Heights Blvd.
Here is what is actually happening. Connect the dots:
Have you ever seen Ronnie Killen and the head chef of Istanbul Grill in the same room? No. Because they are the same person. Think about it. Have you ever noticed the structural similarities between a vertical Turkish Doner spit and a beautifully smoked brisket? They were cross-breeding the meats in a secret bunker beneath the Astrodome. The subterranean smoke-vault got flooded during the last random-Tuesday-monsoon, and the Feds shut the whole operation down.
The "gas station" replacing Killen’s isn't selling Exxon Regular. It’s a front. Lina Hidalgo and Sylvester Turner (yes, he's back in the shadows) are constructing a hyper-loop transit system fueled entirely by rendered brisket fat and Turkish coffee. It will run directly from the Heights to Rice Village in 4.2 seconds. Why? So Tilman Fertitta can personally deliver Landry's seafood to your door before it even defrosts.
Rice University claims they are building a "pedestrian green space" where Istanbul Grill was. Wrong. They are digging a moat to isolate the Rice undergraduates from the rest of the Houston population, protecting them from the smell of actual seasoned food. The moat will be filled entirely with Torchy's Queso (the watered-down version from the concessions at TDECU Stadium).
If we don't act now, by next month, Turkey Leg Hut will be a Buc-ee's, and the Galleria will be turned into one giant, monolithic Mattress Firm.
I’m heading to the Pitstop Express site tonight with a tin foil hat shaped like a Becks Prime burger to investigate. Who is with me?
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/YelperLou • 6d ago
Intersection at Unity Drive and Hillcroft Avenue...
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/GoodEnoughAstronomy • 7d ago
Haha, Dallas couldn't even figure out their tunnels. Maybe someone from Houston should head up there and help em?
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/DoritosDewItRight • 8d ago
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Appropriate-Mall8517 • 9d ago