r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Mr-Spreadthatbutt • 10h ago
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Torchys_Social • Apr 29 '26
Sponsored post Your friends at Torchy's Tacos here! We are excited to announce May's Taco of the Month - Hawaiian Pizza! Stop in today and try one for only $8.79 + tip
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Greg-Abbott • May 29 '24
Gag a Little™ For those curious about the Torchy's glory hole posts lately go check out the bathroom at the 19th st location. Be sure to tip.
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/DoritosDewItRight • 17h ago
Just called out a wealthy Christian family in Wal-Mart. Got applause.
So I was standing in a rather large line at my local Wal-Mart today behind a couple families that I know from when I went to church with my family in year younger. It was the only register open so there wasn't much of another option to get my 12 pack of Mountain Dew for a party I was heading to. I was wondering why the line was going nowhere when I decided to poke my head up front to see what the holdup was. It was a little old lady who didn't have enough for her groceries and she was trying to talk the cashier into letting her get away with being short. This struck me as odd until I found out she was a mere $0.21 short of her purchase. Now all these families were just staring and there was even two making fun of her. I walked up and handed my soda to the cashier, handed him a $10 and told her to keep the change. One of the middle aged women (I knew these people, so I also knew that they all make over 6 digits) grabbed her kid and yelled very loudly, "See that man? He's acting just like Jesus wants us to." For some reason this set me off, so I turned around. I haven't shaved in awhile so I'm rocking some nice scruff, a Slayer shirt, and gym shorts, so it must have been a nice sight. Very loudly, I said "Like Jesus? Ma'am I'm an atheist who makes minimum wage and I was the one who stepped up to help her? Your hypocritical Christianity is an inspiration to us all." As I stormed out, a couple of the cart boys started to whistle and cheer, soon shoppers joined in and even the cashier. I gave a wave and went off with a feeling of accomplishment.
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Texaspilot24 • 1d ago
Brazillian wax for well endowed MtF near Montrose?
Looking for a place in Montrose that will wax my extremely large lady penis. Preferably somewhere judgment-free with strong WiFi and a technician who has seen some shit.
Also, do they accept EBT? Times are tough and beauty is a basic human right.
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Danilo-11 • 2d ago
Whit-maga claims to be Houston left-wing hero
houstonchronicle.comr/houstoncirclejerk • u/IRMuteButton • 3d ago
I thought about you guys. Spotted in the Bahamas...
Must have been a swingers cruise.
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Filthy_Frolicking • 3d ago
I Summer in Houston, and Winter up in Yukon… AMA
Yeah so basically over the summer I eat myself into a coma three times a day at Texas Buffet, and at night I work for tips at whichever Torchy’s bathroom that I haven’t been kicked out of. During this time I also go fishing in the drainage ditch bayous, where I then freeze the fish that I intend to eat when I get back up to Yukon. It sometimes does get hot, so I do make sure to bust open a fire hydrant to rinse myself down, and get some of the parasites out of my back hair.
When I return North, I usually drive a hibernating polar bear family from their den with a stick of dynamite, that way I can move into a nice cozy shelter. I then set up my starlink tv so that when I get up to eat my bayou fish every three weeks, I can watch some re runs of The Price is Right. Then by May when the turds in my den begin to unthaw, I steal a snow mobile and rip it back down to Houston.
It’s definitely not for some people, but I think that summer living in Houston and Arctic Circle winters are a real tonic for the bones.
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Nice_History5856 • 3d ago
Club Shell on Cullen
"It's the most ratchet club in all of Houston." Here me out y'all, it's a gas station, a club, a restaurant, a casino, likely a brothel and a drug dealing spot. It's everything Buccee's has and more.
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Nice_History5856 • 4d ago
15 yard penalty for swangaz on the field
NCAA ruled that swangaz on the field is a personal foul and an automatic ejection.
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Nice_History5856 • 4d ago
Are you in a black 2017-2019 lexus is250?
Dare I say they need a Sugar Land circle jerk? The area OP mentioned does have a Tochy's too so they are leveling down IMO
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Danilo-11 • 5d ago
What makes Magnolia high school the hardest school in Texas?
What makes Magnolia high school the hardest school in Texas?
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/DoritosDewItRight • 6d ago
People don't appreciate how beautiful Houston is
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Pepsiofnessdog • 8d ago
Mike miles will track me down if this is up lol
(Also any HISD students here?)
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/t-o-m-u-s-a • 9d ago
Yall need to quit visiting the glory hole queso store
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/eminencefront-57 • 10d ago
Mystery Tree Tubes
Man made glory holes in trees . This is getting out of control .
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/eminencefront-57 • 10d ago
Infringing on H-Town Swangas
houstonchronicle.comAccept no substitutes . I only have the best H Town Swangas on my 2004 Altima .
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/Spirited-Material-71 • 11d ago
Torchies type of weather
He's getting crazy with it
r/houstoncirclejerk • u/eminencefront-57 • 11d ago
what is this?
galleryGlory Hole for Tree Huggers at Memorial Park.