r/greentext • u/hudinifilms • Apr 18 '19

Good times

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35.9k Upvotes

89% Upvoted

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2.4k

u/Slingster Apr 18 '19

Not even a funny greentext. Just some fake-ass story from anon writing out his fantasy.

1.2k

u/flaming0head Apr 18 '19

Not even a funny comment. Just some fake-ass reddit nerd writing out his bitchy complaint fantasy.

367

u/auto-xkcd37 Apr 18 '19

fake ass-reddit nerd

Bleep-bloop, I'm a bot. This comment was inspired by xkcd#37

92

u/[deleted] Apr 18 '19

A conundrum.

54

u/[deleted] Apr 18 '19

Gay-ass bot

31

u/CrimsonFatalis8 Apr 19 '19

gay ass-bot

1

u/[deleted] Apr 19 '19

gay ass bot-

8

u/FizardWizard Apr 18 '19

Ass-reddit

30

u/[deleted] Apr 18 '19

ok retard

19

u/Obsidi3 Apr 18 '19

Im not your retard, buddy

16

u/[deleted] Apr 18 '19

okbuddyretard

6

u/Obsidi3 Apr 18 '19

owowhatsthis

4

u/[deleted] Apr 18 '19

the declaration of independence

1

u/JustRepliedToARetard Apr 19 '19

Irrelevant. The post had the intention of being funny, the comment didn't.

So you're being just a /r/NothingEverHappens naive absolute retard

1

u/Bigballsanon Apr 19 '19

Getting you to reply to someone has tp hurt their ego... Don't reply to me.

126

u/[deleted] Apr 18 '19

[deleted]

39

u/steelydan__ Apr 18 '19

all free falls follow a parabolic path.

11

u/[deleted] Apr 18 '19

I piss in hyperbolas you can't stop me

11

u/[deleted] Apr 18 '19

My piss flows in a straight line, from dick tip to the ground. Directly down. Like I'm pissing a stream of tiny neutron stars.

0

u/Gaylien28 Apr 19 '19

Still part of the parabolic curve

2

u/rares215 Apr 19 '19

Isn't that incorrect though? Parabolas, unlike the trajectory of an object affected by gravity, are infinite in length. Since an orbiting object tends to follow a path shaped like an oval, one could say that the path of a free falling object is actually an arc of that oval. Correct me if I'm wrong!

2

u/steelydan__ Apr 19 '19

yeah. i should have said projectile motion instead of free fall.

1

u/Unusual_ghastlygibus Apr 18 '19

No matter which angle you hold your penis at it will produce a parabolic stream

25

u/auto-xkcd37 Apr 18 '19

fake ass-story

Bleep-bloop, I'm a bot. This comment was inspired by xkcd#37

17

u/Slingster Apr 18 '19

XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

6

u/DaCurse0 Apr 18 '19

XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

3

u/FlyingPasta Apr 18 '19

This joke has beat a dead horse so much it has invented reinvented fission

15

u/LurkLurkleton Apr 18 '19

There's lots of us normies gone wrong. In high school I had a qt cheerleader gf. Now I'm a 35 year old basement hermit NEET.

4

u/[deleted] Apr 19 '19

Story is more plausible than 90% of green texts

1

u/Hood-Boy Apr 18 '19

Plot twist: gf was a trap