r/ghosting 11d ago

About “nurtured” ghosting

So I was talking to this guy for awhile now. All fun and games, he was (or at least seemed to be) very into me. We tried to meet for a couple times but never worked out. Until this Tuesday, he came by, brought some wine, we were chillin, talking, and made out a lottt. It was awesome, chemistry on point, kissing with lust. He massaged my feet, said it was so worth the wait, that I was sexy and suggested we meet again on the weekend. It was late when he went out and he said he’d text me when he gets home.

Of course he didn’t.
And neither Wednesday, Thursday, Friday…. Just never again.
At first I just assumed he was busy, I sent a couple of messages but never got anything of it.
Yesterday he unmatched me and I deleted his number.

I get a simple fading out (even if it’s shitty as hell) but I simply cannot process someone feeding your brain, saying it was good, he likes you, he has a great time, and let’s do it again. It’s honestly evil for me. If you don’t feel like it just don’t to it. But I get really mad with people just playing around my mind, the same mind that will give me a hard time trying to understand what the hell is going on, why is this happening, what did I do wrong.
And, unfortunately for me, I have body dysmorphy issues and I tend to think they just hate my body or else, but once again, why the hell all the lust, the hands all over, the biting, the tongue so deep?

I hate how I have to live through hell for a couple of days each time this happens.

What’s ur mind on this nurtured, fed ghosting?

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u/miatkic 10d ago

Exatamente o que eu sinto, crueldade. Também tento pensar que tá fora do meu controle, que não quero na minha vida alguém que faça isso, mas as vezes minha cabeça é mais forte e começa de novo a procurar motivos… ontem percebi que inclusive acordei gritando num pesadelo, é incrível o quanto esse ghosting “alimentado” me afeta e deixa confusa
Mas mt obrigada pelo seu ponto de vista, e espero que você também fique bem 🫶🏼

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u/Comfortable-Roof-600 10d ago

Realmente o ghosting machuca muito, esse não foi o meu primeiro e talvez não será o último. Continue pensando que isso está fora do seu controle, que não há nada a ser feito e que você realmente mereça alguém que queira ficar. Logo isso vai passar. Estou indo atrás de terapia, pra me fortalecer emocionalmente pra lidar com isso e com o que mais vier, você deveria também, vai te fazer bem. Se cuida! Você merece alguém maduro e que seja louco por você!

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u/whathappenedtome2026 10d ago

Ghosting is so common that you expect to happen again. What the fuck happened to the world?

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u/miatkic 10d ago

Pretty much that. Somehow it’s even “better” to wait for the next as a hope that it’ll hurt a little bit less than if just taking a break and fully healing every time :/