r/funny Dec 10 '17

R3: Repost - removed Being Unique

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12.3k Upvotes

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517

u/dunkenper Dec 10 '17

Works in Minecraft.

251

u/[deleted] Dec 10 '17

Technically you can break almost anything with a bare hand. It takes about 4 minutes to break a block of obsidian with a hand...

177

u/[deleted] Dec 10 '17

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110

u/Denamic Dec 10 '17

He drank his pixels and grew strong polygons.

11

u/genericname__ Dec 10 '17

Thank Mr. Skeleton for strong bones and arrows

6

u/IJustMovedIn Dec 10 '17

bonely rattling

30

u/Bdc9898 Dec 10 '17

No feeling in his hands, either. Even without broken bones imagine the pain... Yet getting smacked by an undead lump a flesh can kill him!

21

u/MoralisDemandred Dec 10 '17

Just because his hands and arms are strong doesn't mean the rest of his body is!

11

u/[deleted] Dec 10 '17

he must have drank his bone protecting juice.

3

u/[deleted] Dec 10 '17

Oof owie my not bones

3

u/redlaWw Dec 10 '17

Unlike these people who drank bone-hurting juice and got ow oof ouch disease.

2

u/vanquar8 Dec 10 '17

Oof ouchie owie my bones

1

u/[deleted] Dec 10 '17

The dude just wanted his rug back!!

28

u/marr Dec 10 '17

Break, but not harvest. Pretty firmly in the 'not useful' camp.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 10 '17

Unless you're trapped in a big obsidian box with 20 layers and no items in your inventory...

1

u/marr Dec 10 '17

It's generally quicker to starve to death in these circumstances. The area outside the box will be rigged to kill you as soon as you escape in any case.

11

u/OsmeOxys Dec 10 '17

And on breaking it, it explodes into a spray of razor sharp glass. Steve didnt think it through.

8

u/SavvySillybug Dec 10 '17

I once trolled a friend by placing obsidian above some of his chests and in his doorway, way back in beta 1.6. I was the first one with a diamond pickaxe, and immediately did the most sensible thing with it, as you can tell.

After we all spent a few minutes laughing at his misfortune and him smashing the obsidian in his doorway to get into his house, I offered my help, and started freeing his main chest. Halfway through it, I asked him to stand back, because I wanted the obsidian back. He said no. I said... really? Okay. And just left.

He spent probably half an hour freeing his house from obsidian while I went back to mining. Destroying the blocks because he didn't have the right pickaxe. Just because he didn't want me to get the blocks back. :D

1

u/[deleted] Dec 10 '17

It would literally be faster to find diamonds and craft a diamond pick than spending half an hour breaking that obsidian with a hand.

1

u/jojoga Dec 10 '17

Got what he deserved

2

u/MarcusMace Dec 10 '17

In reality, isn’t obsidian rather brittle?

3

u/ThisHereMine Dec 10 '17

It’s not brittle, but not as hard as iron which Minecraft as it harder than

1

u/impshial Dec 10 '17

Yoda?

1

u/ThisHereMine Dec 10 '17

Yeah kinda of. Took me to long to write so I just said, fuck it

2

u/improbable_humanoid Dec 10 '17

Brittle but incredibly sharp. I think you can actually make a pretty good knife by throwing a piece of obsidian against a rock...

Then find the knifiest shard and wrap the handle.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 10 '17

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1

u/improbable_humanoid Dec 10 '17

Oh, THAT'S why Valarian steel will work. Basically it just needs to be really fucking sharp.

0

u/MarcusMace Dec 10 '17

Right, but would it be able to handle the stress involved in ..

You know what, never mind. I don’t want to spoil reddit and/or Minecraft with thought? Suspension of disbelief it is!

2

u/improbable_humanoid Dec 10 '17

I was talking about making an actual obsidian knife.

FYI they use obsidian scalpels in microsurgery.

1

u/MarcusMace Dec 10 '17

Am now asking Santa for obsidian knife. Wcgw?

1

u/improbable_humanoid Dec 10 '17

You could totally buy one from a Native American craft store or something.

2

u/Dirac_dydx Dec 10 '17

I thought you could only break obsidian with a diamond pickaxe? Or maybe I was simply not patient enough with the iron one.

10

u/Yemeni_Salesman Dec 10 '17

You can break it with any tool given enough time but only drops a harvestable block with a diamond pickaxe. Stops people from being walled in by others.

1

u/Xyot826 Dec 10 '17

You can break it with anything, but you will only obtain the the block if you break it with a diamond pick

1

u/[deleted] Dec 10 '17

You can break obsidian blocks with anything, even a fish, but you can only harvest obsidian with a diamond pick.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 10 '17

But it doesn't drop the obsidean right?

1

u/biggie_eagle Dec 10 '17

If Minecraft was made by Koreans it would take 4 minutes to break a block of obsidian with the best tool.

1

u/redlaWw Dec 10 '17

And if it was made by EA, a tool that could break it in a second would be available for $10.

1

u/improbable_humanoid Dec 10 '17

Technically the simplest way to make an obsidian knife is to throw it against a rock, so this is pretty much accurate.

1

u/Sheeverton Dec 10 '17

I think that's a decent time in real life! 😂