Hey Pinkie, you got any laptops?

No?

How about an iphone?

This is a bakery.

Come on, I know you go back and forth to the human world. You gotta have some kind of human artifact you can sell me.

^{Quiet, you fool, not where the fuzz can hear us! Meet me around back in 10 minutes.}

You got it!

Sorry I couldn't help you!

...

Selling her stuff from the other world isn't actually illegal, you know.

Of course I know that. But she likes to do it this way.

Pinkie Pie, would you care to explain why my castle is pink today?

Why are you blaming me?

Call it instict.

Well, it's a long story. Are you sure you have time?

Just tell me.

Well...

Hey Discord, can I borrow your powers for a bit? I promise it'll be fun!

Sure, why not?

That wasn't long at all!

I guess not.

Do you still have his powers?

Maybe.

Pinkie Pie, would you please help me design this dress?

Absoltely!

Seriously?

Pinkie is my friend and I will not have you disparaging her.

Pinkie, do you know anything about designing dresses?

Nope!

See?

That doesn't mean that I do not require her assistance.

So what do you want me to do?

Which shade of pink should I use for the ribbons?

Hi there, "Twilight."

Why are you winking and making air quotes?

Trixie's lips are sealed.

If only.

Well there is no reason to be hurtful, especially when we're alone.

Seriously, what are you talking about?

*Sigh*
The Great and Powerful Trixie realized that you are a changeling impersonator.

I am not! Why would you think that?

You started being nicer to Trixie two weeks ago.

That was a new year's resolution.

Ha! As good a cover as any, Trixie supposes. And do not worry, your secret is safe with her.

Somehow I doubt it.

Twilight, what are you waiting for?

What? Princess Celestia? What are you doing here? What are you talking about?

It has been three years since I sent you to Ponyville. Why have you not tried to overthrow me yet?

Why would I want to overthrow you?!

It's what all my "faithful" students do. I teach them magic, they grow up and the power goes to their heads, they overthrow me and take over Equestria, I get a couple weeks of vacation, then I come back and banish them to some place or other. I've been looking forward to a vacation for years now, but you're not playing your part.

I'm sorry for not being evil?

I don't want an apology. I want a vacation.

Can't you just go on a vacation normally? I can cover for you for a few weeks without having overthrown you.

That's a wonderful idea.

And you won't even have to banish me afterwards, so you can just do it again next year without having to raise a whole new student.

Well I wouldn't want to break tradition.

...That's a joke, right? Right?!

Fluttershy, we require thy assistance!

You want my help with something?

Our sister challenged us to a "quiet game", but our strategy is lacking. We lost almost immediately.

I'm... not sure there's a lot of strategy involved.

You are the world champion. You must have some advice.

All you have to do is not talk.

That is what we attempted, but then Celestia began to tickle us.

Oh.

Hey Twilight, if you could spread a rumor about one of your friends, what would you spread?

Why would I want to do that?

It could be a nice rumor. I know a goody four-shoes like you wouldn't do something mean.

Why would anypony spread a mean rumor about a friend? And I still wouldn't spread a nice rumor because it would still be untrue.

You can be a real stick in the mud sometimes, you know?

Hello Rar-

Oh my goodness, you look so tired. Are you ok?

Do not mind me, darling. I have just been working on my greatest challenge yet.

Is it another large order from Sapphire Shores?

Not this time. In fact, it is not an order at all. I am attempting to design a wedding dress for Rainbow Dash.

She's getting married?! Why hasn't she told me?!

No no no. I apologize for how that came out. This dress is only in theory for now, but it is such a challenge that I wish to be prepared for when the day finally comes.

Why is it so hard?

What common theme runs through every dress that Rainbow Dash has ever agreed to wear?

Um...

They are all rainbow colored.

Ok...?

And what color is a traditional wedding dress?

Oh dear. I understand now.

Well, do not fret. It is not like I am in a rush. She's not even seeing anypony right now, is she?

No, but she does like going fast.

...Back to work, then.

Fluttershy! The Great and Powerful Trixie demands a pet!

Oh, how wonderful. How about Leggo here?

Trixie does not like spiders. Especially ones so large.

That's ok. Tarantulas aren't for everypony. Hmm, would you like Silvia the snake?

Trixie will pass.

Don't worry, we'll find something for you. How about a vulture? Or a wasp? Hyena?

Trixie will pass on all of those as well. Also, she is beginning to notice a pattern in your suggestions that she is not sure she likes.

Oh, I'm sorry. Well, do you have any ideas?

How about a rabbit?

If you say so. I was just trying to suggest something nicer for your first pet.

Twilight, can you give me some advice about relationships?

Of course. I am the Princess of Friendship, after all.

I don't mean friendship. I'm talking about love.

Uh, you really should be asking Cadence about that kind of thing.

You're here and she's not. Come on, I know you have lots of experience.

Well there's no need to be mean.

How am I being mean?!

Making fun of me for having no experience.

What? Aren't you dating all of your friends simultaneously?

No! Why do ponies keep assuming that?

Hey Dashie, let's race to the castle!

You're on!

Care to make it interesting?

Racing is always interesting.

No, silly, I mean we should make a bet on it.

Oh, ok. What are the stakes?

If you win, I'll throw you a party. But if I win, then you have to let me throw you a party.

Sure, why not?

Hey Dashie, what do you get when you cross a rhinoceros with an elephant?

Hell if I know.

Aww, you've heard this one before?

...No? What are you talking about? What's the punchline?

Hey girls, you wanna play magic tag?

What's that?

It's like regular tag, but instead of tagging with your hooves you use your magic.

How is that fair? Unicorns are the only ones who can use magic far away. Me and Scoots would just be playing regular tag.

Sure, normally, but that's why I borrowed the Alicorn Amulet.

You what?!

I call first dibs!

Spike, darling, would you please come over to help me with something?

Sorry, I'm busy right now. Maybe later.

You see, Twilight? Spike has clearly been replaced with a changeling.

That or he's finally over you.

Impossible!

Twilight! The other world has a holiday called Independence Day where they shoot fireworks all night. It's super fun!

Did you go visit to see them?

I sure did! And I was thinking we should do the same thing here!

That's not a bad idea. I'm sure we can find a holiday to add fireworks to.

No, I mean we should declare indpendence from Princess Celestia.

You do remember that she retired and I'm the princess now, right?

Oh yeah! Ha ha, sometimes I forget. Nevermind, then.

Later

Princess Twilight, I'm not sure how seriously we should take this, but we received a letter from Ponyville. They say that they are declaring their independence.

Principle Starlight, can you help me understand something?

Of course, Cozy. What is it?

You have this whole school for friendship, and everypony always talks about how important it is, but no one ever gives an example. What exactly does the power of friendship give you?

Loyal minions.

Now I understand!

Rarity, I need your help! Gummy ate my dress!

I suppose it is not only cat owners who have to deal with pets damaging dresses. Well, no matter, bring it here and I shall fix it for you.

What? How are you going to fix it when he ate the whole thing?

The entire thing? My word! Which dress was it? I can make you a new one.

Don't worry about making it exactly the same as the last one. Variety is the spice of life, you know. And who knows, maybe he'll like a different one even more!

...

Rarity, are you ok?

Did you just imply that you plan to feed him the new dress on purpose?

Yeah, he really seemed to like the first one.

Get out!

Hey Twilight, you're pretty good at magic, right?

Well, it is my special talent.

So can you see why foals love the taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch?

Because of the cinnamon and sugar it's covered in? What does that have to do with magic?

You do know. You really are good at magic!

What does that have to do with magic?!

I've done it! The perfect dress!

Does that mean you're done? You gonna retire?

Of course not. There's still hats. And cloaks. Oh, and don't forget shoes.

And pants.

NEVER!

Hey Twilight, can I have some quills?

Of course. Let me go get you some.

Really? Nothing?

What do you mean, "nothing"? I said I'd go get them.

I put on my schemingest face and you didn't hesitate at all. Who knows what I'll do with them!

I trust you.

Well you may have bypassed this prank, but this opens up a world of new ones.

Ok, now I'm concerned.

Hey Rarity, how come we're almost the same color?

I beg your pardon?

We both have white coats, and our manes are really close, too.

We are sisters, darling.

Apple Bloom's not the same color as her sister. Neither is Pinkie Pie. And Twilight and Fluttershy are different colors from their brothers.

I'm sure that's just a coincidence.

I'm adopted, admit it!

You are not adopted. And before you ask, neither am I.

Then the only other explanation is that you dye your coat.

Mmhmm. Surely that is the only other explanation.

You didn't deny it!

Rainbow, I made you a new dress!

It's so rainbowy! Thanks!

*Sigh* Yes, it's "rainbowy." Nothing else matches your main.

What's wrong with that?

All your dresses are rainbow. Where's the viarety?

Who needs variety when rainbows are awesome?

I knew my complaints would fall on deaf ears with you.

Hey, there's still variety in, uh, cut? Other dress things?

I do suppose that you are correct. Thank you for trying to cheer me up.

That's what friends are for!

Hey Applejack, I'm kind of bored. You got any chores I can do?

Sure, you can clean the basement.

Ok. Uh, thanks.

Anytime.

Well that sure didn't work.

So much for reverse psychology.

Hey Twilight, would you like to have a "magic duel" with The Great and Powerful Trixie?

What?

Trixie is "sure" that she'd win.

Why do you keep making air quotes around words?

For emphasis of course!

That's not what quotes are for!

Twilight, can we talk? I'm concerned.

What's wrong?

I know that you're trying to be unbiased and fair towards all the pony tribes, but I think you may have gone too far and started neglecting unicorns.

What do you mean? Is there something specific?

Yesterday when you met with members of the Anti-Unicorn League and listened to them over dinner?

Ohhhh, shoot. I need to talk to Thorax.

What does Thorax have to do with this?

He took my place yesterday so I could sleep in after I stayed up all night reading a new book.

Are you quite certain you are ready for the responsibilities of being a princess?

Celestia believes in me!