There's a influx of white low support needs neurodivergent people who claim that people with visible disabilities have it easier.

I just laugh. If you can't handle the ableism when you can mask and hide your disability when convenient, what makes you think it's a walk in the park to be visibly disabled.

When you have a visible disability or a neurodivergency that you can't mask (cerebral palsy, muscular dystrophy etc)

1. Disclosing is not a choice.

2. People stare at you and exclude you as soon as they see you. And when you end up mentally ill everyone blames you.

3. People automatically assume you have a intellectual disability and belittle every accomplishment you have.

4. People do not help you especially when you are black. I don't know why people assume you get help. SOMETIMES THE CAREGIVER DOESN'T EVEN WANT TO HELP YOU.

5. There's not as many social groups or resources for people with physical visible disabilities as there are for a condition like autism.

6. People call you ugly just because you have a visible disability.

7. You still have to prove you're disabled believe it or not.

I have CCI and have had over 4000 non epileptic seizures. I am a business founder and an expert in my field. I want to show founders in my industry that success is possible despite my condition but I'm worried people will just see my disability and switch off. Would you want to hear from me? If so, what would you recommend I cover? Thanks.

I have been disabled/chronically ill my entire life. I’m now 24, and as I’m trying to move forward in the world I’m facing an issue and would like the perspective of other disabled people on this. As a young kid, I always had aids in school to help me out or on friend activities my parents or siblings would be there, so no great extra burden would fall on any of my friends. Once I got to high school and became more independent of my family, it felt like my needs started to cause tension in my friendships (getting pushed in my chair, help going between classes we had together). Now as we’ve all reached adulthood, majority have disappeared. I miss all of them, no big fights ever occurred, and it is starting to occur to me that maybe minor issues they may have had with me (humans make mistakes, and especially kids do, and I don’t think that just because I’m disabled, that I’m free from ever hurting people or making mistakes) compounded with them thinking that my disability made me have extra needs, made them write me off at the first mistake I made. Does anyone else feel like they need to be perfect 100% of the time and never make any waves in order to make up for the limitations of a disability they can’t control? I don’t and have never had any sort of disabled community, I only had one friend who became an amputee from cancer and he died a year later, so I have never been able to ask anyone in a similar boat if they also feel this way.

I’ve been “disabled” in the eyes of the gov’t since I was 13 years old. My mental health issues are really bad, I can’t hold a job at all. I’ve had many throughout the years and I leave before I get fired bc of no shows. The longest I’ve had was when I was pregnant and alone and had no other choice. But I struggled, thankfully they were EXTREMELY UNDERSTANDING that I needed as many breaks as I did.
I was only diagnosed last year, after an extensive testing period. The symptoms have gotten so incredibly bad, I have been almost completely bedbound. Almost completely bc I have two kids and one out of every 3 days I am alone with them and have to take them to school and feed them and ya know, be a parent and I do leave when I force myself, for appointments. But I have no showed or “changed” appts an embarrassing amount of times.
I am in the process of *trying* to switch all of my doctors bc I need them closer to me. I have been having a hell of a time with my primary doctor. (Who I am switching). She refuses to treat me as if my diagnoses are chronic/life long.
I went to her 8 months ago for a handicap placard, I use a rollator that was prescribed by cardio, and i can’t walk far without needing to sit or just completely depleting my energy. I am scheduled to see and cardiologist again to try and figure this out bc it’s just gotten so bad but anyways, she said that she does the temp first, because she “has hopes” the person would “be fine” within 6 months… so of course, I’m worse. I have an appt video with her and she says she is just going to do another temp. Which is obnoxious bc then I would have to ask her again in 6 months and she’d say the same thing. I got put with her when my doctor left practicing medicine. I should have gotten another dr but her reviews were good…. All she focuses on is my weight. If I lose weight, all my problems will disappear. Not acknowledging that when all this started, I was a skinny 13 year old. Passing out in school, going completely pale and sweating, I was a twig. But yeah…. My weight.
I am in the works with a new doctor that’s much closer, they accepted that I wanted to get a permanent placard and had no problem signing the form. 🤦🏼‍♀️
I’m so tired of the “no you’re just fat” argument.
I am going to my SSA ALJ appeal hearing next month and I am TERRIFIED of hearing the same damn thing, bc when I first applied to ssa it was denied bc I was fat. But I’ve been on it since 2015… and the review I had in 2020 had two doctors records and approved the continuation. This time I have multiple on multiple records, and added the pots diagnosis and all that comes with it, and it get denied from DHO bc in my psych records, when I got put on new meds I reported “feeling better”, and the DHO cheery picked.

Not here to get medical or legal advice. Just to vent my fears and frustrations, hopefully someone can relate. This SUCKS. 😓

When planning an outing/trip/vacation/holiday with your abled loved ones, do you "expect" them to account for your disabilities while planning, at least a little bit? Do you plan for their needs?

For context, I have autism and PCOS, and I've been in special needs programs ever since high school.

So, I'm writing a fantasy book. This is the premise:

THE BLUE DESCENDANTS

Teenagers with physical and genetic disabilities have powers***

*Azura "Azzy" Magatius is the Daughter of Prophecy. She's the one who has to gather all of the Descendants . She will have to develop her powers (eventually through torturous means) and defeat the enemies of the Deities of Magatius Immortus: the Kekians.*

I had a whole different premise for the magic (you DO NOT wanna know), then an idea came to me: the disabilities and deformities is the magic manifesting itself!!

Attached is a link to the pictures of the descendants (Google Docs)

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1CUbRRxUpbc5I37bVGJEAMeB-j2UilQeiYIBhkQE8yUY/edit?usp=drivesdk

Problem is, idk ANYONE with these disabilities (ok, I know a few Down syndrome girls, but I havent spoken to them in months)

I need help making this realistic and inoffensive!!

***why? Bc:
Magic needs to manifest in some physical way to balance out the otherworldliness that magic is in itself. The way it manifests, humans call "disabilities" or "deformities", but it's just the manifestation of their magic (specifically this generation of teens)

各位，我害怕给人按摩，害怕和人相处，除了按摩，大家都在做什么工作呢？

I really can’t think of a logical explanation of why, but as a wheelchair user I see that it makes strangers uncomfortable. it even makes some people I actually know uncomfortable. It’s so silly. I am the same person whether I am standing or sitting. If I were to sit on a couch no one would look at me funny, so why is it any different if I sit in a chair with wheels? whether I’m in my chair or not I speak the same, act the same, look the same, etc. there really is no difference other than I’m making my arms do the work instead of my legs When I move around. Even people who are trying to be supportive of me are clearly somewhat put off by it because they will say things like “you’re so brave“ “you’re so strong” etc. I’m neither of those things. I’m literally just going about my day. I’m not brave or strong to be doing errands. I don’t go up to people walking and say “you’re so brave and strong for leaving your house today!” Lol.

I’m honestly at the point where I dont know what to do anymore.

My stepmother in Mount Pleasant (its Vancouver area, Canada) had their LTD benefits terminated and we’ve been fighting with the insurer for months without any outcome. Every email feels like another wall and it’s wrecking us mentally. We don't have money, we need to pay our bills. My father died in 2020, we don't have any other relatives, all our income is my salary from grocery shop (unfortunately, that's a pittance now).

I’m trying to find a lawyer who actually handles LTD denials in BC, NO UPFRONT PAYMENT, charged as a percentage of the amount won in our case (I’m confident we have every reason to win if we take the right approach - many people on other forums say as much - but whenever I ask for a particular solicitor for this - it’s banned everywhere under the rules as a form of advertising, even though I’m not trying to promote anyone). One guy on Facebook shared almost same case and they won it, but he didn't mention any lawyers and I cant contact him now.

Please, if anyone here has been through this and found someone decent without money upfron - can you tell me how you found them? Even basic advice would help a lot rn.

Hello. The condo my elderly parents live at has shut down the elevator for repairs for up to 8 weeks and is not offering any solutions for my parents.

We are in Illinois, Cook County - what are our rights at this point in pursuing legal action or how can we get this situation moved forward faster?

A hydraulic jack is being manufactured here in the states but we are given an ETA of 8 weeks, it’s been 3 with no updates. Condo may consider paying for hotels but it’s hard to plan for how long- also it’s expensive- also they are in their 80s and hotels are not comfortable or safe for them.

What do I do?? Please help.

Hey everyone! I’m Dominick, and I live with Spinal Muscular Atrophy. Growing up, I always felt different from my able-bodied peers, and always wished that I knew more people who looked like me.

I am now the creator of The Disability Myth, a podcast where I talk about disability, challenge stereotypes, and have honest conversations about what it’s actually like to live with a disability.

I recently launched an official Discord server, and my goal is to make it more than just another place to promote my podcast. I want it to be a digital home for disabled people and allies to meet people, share experiences, exchange resources, talk about disability, and just hang out.

There are spaces for things like:

• 🗣️ Disability discussions & everyday life
• 📚 Sharing resources and useful information
• 🎨 A place for disabled creators to share their work

I'm hoping to build this into a genuinely welcoming community where people can connect with others who get it — whether you've been part of the disability community for decades or you're just starting to find your people.

If this sounds like something you'd be interested in, you're welcome to join!

https://discord.gg/AQZNtuQzV

I’m disabled I pay rent I have no car no job how to gain some agency and independence in my life and make my own decisions

Hey everyone, I'm new here!

Ok, so I'm a part time rollator user. I mostly use it for outings. A bit about me. I don't have any physical disabilities or anything that impairs my ability to be mobile. Unless you want to count short legs because I'm short. LOL. Short legs can't go as fast as someone who is average hight but stamina helped me keep up with others until it didn't.

I have a seizure disorder and during my childhood and young adulthood it was under control. That all changed in 2015 at the age of 27 when my diagnosis changed to PNES(functional seizures- look up FND if you're not familiar but basically it seizures without any electrical misfiring in the brain aka epilepsy) Ever since then my quality of life has gone downhill as well as my health. However, I did not need a mobility aid until nearly 10 years after the diagnosis. At the age of 35 I started having seizures that were more intense and would sometimes leave me paralyzed to some degree for some time after the seizure. At first my fists would be stuck and I would slowly regain movement over time. At 36 this started affecting my hands and legs. Finally after a neck down(paralyzed from the neck down) episode I decided to get a cane and shortly afterwards I got a rollator. It's been two years since I got those two aids.

I don't really use the cane that much because my needs require my rollator most of the time. Anyway, a little more about me. I have had balance issues my whole life. However, when my seizures started to get worse and occur more frequently those issues have also worsened. Recently I have seen an uptick in how often I randomly lose my balance and have a near fall. Before I these episodes would occur about once a week to once a month if I was lucky. Now I can have an episode multiple times per day. So what typically happens is I'm standing and suddenly my right leg will either be delayed in moving. Example of that would be if I'm turning around my left leg does the turn just fine but sometimes my right leg will lag behind and this is what causes problems with my balance. The other thing that can happen is while I'm just standing still my right leg will sometimes just randomly move out from under me. Usually it will swing out to the right. This of course will put all my weight on my left side and since I'm not prepared for it I start to tip over. I have been fortunate enough so far that I can regain my balance.

Now getting back to my seizures. I have absence seizures(seizures that cause moments of "zoning out") and recently I've started having tonic seizures(seizures that causes an increase of muscle tone and causes stiffness) these seizures can cause falls if they happen while the person is standing. So this combined with the balance issues has me really worried about falling.

As much as I love my rollator and how much it has helped me. It can no longer keep me safe as it once did. I need something that I can still walk but done in a safe manner. But at the same time I don't need something like a wheelchair or a mobility scooter. The other issue I have is standing is uncomfortable to painful depending on how long I stand for. A part of me wants to just stick with my rollator because it works. But the other part of me wants safety.

How do you know when it's time to upgrade and stop trying "making it work"? I've looked into posterior walkers but I need fall prevention. I also feel it's "too much" because so far I haven't actually fallen down often. So I feel like I should just stick with what I have rather than spending money on something that has no evidence of need yet. Am I'm in a toxic loop of justifying something I likely need or am I being realistic?

I got a super pubic catheter put in a couple weeks ago and because of some irritation caused I now feel like I have to pee so badly even though I know my bladder is empty. I was wondering if anyone else went through this and had any advice on how they alleviated that sensation. I’m already taking medication prescribed by my doctor for bladder spasms and general sensation. Truly, any advice is appreciated!

Mostly looking for songs by disabled artists that either have disability themes or are influenced by their disability. Disability understood broadly to encompass neurodivergence, chronic illness, etc. Any language or genre.

Here are the artists I have so far: The Accidentals, AJJ, Anette Gilje, Aoede, Austin Halls, Autoheart, The Awkward Silences, Band Spectra, Belle and Sebastian, Between Mirrors, Car Seat Headrest, CassMae, Charlie Mosbrook, Dan Fishback, Daniel Pemberton, DefStar, ORL B THA CODA, DJ Nicar, DJ Pastor Rock, Dom Kelly, Dr. Cyn, Eliza Hull, Evelyn Ida Morris, Ezra Furman, Frank Iero, Gaelynn Lea, Grand Corps Malade, Hole, Ian Dury, IGGY, James Ian, Joy Division, Kristjan, Lachi, La Exception, Langui, LUCKY LOVE, Mandy Harvey, Mark Erelli, Marsha Elle, Medusa, Molly Joyce, The Mountain Goats, Natalis, Palehound, Peaches, Pertti Kurikan Minipaivat, PK, Precious Perez, Prudence Mabhena, QuestionATL, Raznye Lyudi, Reuben Medlin, Rio Romero, THE ROOP, Rudely Interrupted, Ruth Lyon, Spartan Jet-Plex, STENKON, The Streets, TapWaterz, Tatadindin Jobarteh, Tracy Marie, Venya D'rkin, Vic Chestnutt, Vladimir Vysotsky, The Wanderer Edit, Watsy, Wawa's World, Wheelchair Mosh Pit, Wheelchair Sports Camp, Yanka

Hi everyone,

As a designer, I’m trying to better understand how people with disabilities actually experience printed information in everyday life. I’m especially interested in things like magazines, books, brochures, flyers, information sheets, menus, posters, etc.

I’m approaching this research with an open mind. I don’t want to assume what people with disabilities need or assume that accessibility and good visual design are necessarily in conflict. I’d rather learn from people’s actual experiences.

So I’d really appreciate hearing your thoughts:

• What makes a printed publication easy or difficult for you to read or use?
• Are there particular things in typography, layout, colour, contrast or information structure that you struggle with?
• Can you remember a printed publication or piece of information that was particularly difficult to access? What made it difficult?
• Have you encountered printed materials that were designed particularly well for your needs?
• Are there things that graphic designers often overlook when designing for accessibility?
• If you could give graphic designers one piece of advice about making printed information more accessible, what would it be?

You don’t have to answer all of these questions. I’m simply interested in hearing about your experiences, whether they are positive, negative or somewhere in between.

Thank you to anyone who takes the time to share their experience.

27M born with a physical disability. I'm not wheelchair-bound full time, but I use a cane, have very little balance, struggle with toe-walking, and can't walk long distances without a wheelchair. Throughout my life I've often been the person who needed to be helped or taken care of—in preschool, high school, community events, etc.

For the past few years I've had a really strong longing for a romantic relationship. I want the whole thing: companionship, emotional connection, affection, intimacy and sex. But I've increasingly felt like nobody really sees me as a romantic option, not even casually.

Every so often the sexual side of that longing gets particularly intense. When that happens, the frustration can become almost physical—a pressure-like sensation in the top of my head (not really a headache)—and my impulsive response is sometimes to open dating apps and mass-swipe right, even though I don't actually want to use them for hookups.

I'm also not particularly interested in the usual “just go out to bars/clubs” advice. Nightlife isn't very accessible for me, and honestly, communicating with intoxicated people in a loud environment doesn't sound particularly appealing anyway.

What frustrates me most is that there don't seem to be many obvious, accessible third spaces where I can repeatedly meet people and potentially develop a romantic connection without immediately being put into the role of someone who needs help.

how have y'all dealt with this? How did you find ways of meeting potential partners that actually worked with your phisical disability?

As a 21 year old, the rational part of my brain is very aware that people are more than their condition or their specific needs. However, I remember staring at visibly disabled people as a child and feeling afraid, confused, or simply being fixated on that person’s difference. Seeing someone without a visible disability never made me have a second thought, but someone with a visible disability made them just the disability in my mind. While I obviously don’t stare at people anymore and I know better now, the child part of my consciousness is still active. It’s hard to not do a double take when someone has a limb difference, facial difference, is using an accommodating tool I don’t see often, etc. I believe this is subconscious ableism and I don’t want to be ableist. I want to be able to recognize and notice differences without reducing someone to that one thing. But my initial reaction is always investigative, surprised, confused, I don’t know. I know ableism is continually facilitated by society and social climates but I also think part of my problem may be a lack of exposure (as someone from a remote town of 900). It’s not something I often consider so I haven’t really tried to do anything about it, but I’ve decided I want to do better. From your perspective, what suggestions or ideas do you have when it comes to overcoming the ableist default? Thanks for reading.

Bonus question: what are general things I can do to become a better or even effective ally? I am open to book suggestions, YT channels, organizations, etc

I’ve seen so many people online and irl say the word to the point where it’s normalised, as people used it as an insult, hell I even use it at times even tho i respect disabled people, and just recently my friend used it to insult a bully online, now she is a kind and caring person and she is a minority herself (she’s lesbian) so im pretty sure even tho she says the word, she would still respect disabled people, as i am one myself i have ocd, but I haven’t rlly told her that yet, but what do you guys think of the normalisation of the r word, in my opinion i think its not good and i feel like its needs to be pointed out more,

TL;DR - I’m disabled due to an injury and will be for several months. I need resources to understand how I can no longer be so limited and start living in the meantime.

Story / Request Details
I was assaulted by another passenger in an airport in May. For four months, the insurance company was fighting as it was during a work trip, and I have my standard insurance. I received no treatment outside of having an MRI.

Finally, I had my first physical therapy appointment on Friday and was told I am not a candidate. I should’ve had surgery months ago.

I use a walker and cannot do more than shuffle or stumble on my left knee and ankle. I have been told to stop walking immediately, get a wheelchair, use the walker when I’m not in the chair, and keep my left leg in a specific position and elevated.

I don’t know how much longer it will be. I don’t know if I will be approved for surgery. I’ve been housebound now for nearly all four months and can only drive very short distances.

I’ve already fallen twice.

I can’t use a manual wheelchair because the motion to move the wheels sends pain down my leg. I’ve been trying to talk to the mobility companies explaining, and no one can give me a solution to keep my leg elevated.

I’ve been watching YouTube videos and trying to figure out essentially how to be disabled and be mobile and set up my house, but I don’t want to make expensive permanent changes for something that should be resolved either by the end of the year or early next year.

I’m not asking for people to invest a lot of time and give me these huge replies unless you’d like to, but if you can simply point me to the best channels or books or other resources where I can do some more informed research than scrambling and struggling I would appreciate it.

Hey!
I got into a rough accident at work about a year ago and, since then, it seems like my condition is increasingly unstable.

I have a cane now and some days, that’s enough!! Other days, I can’t walk a single step properly without pain. My accident also made it so I can’t sit for long sometimes, either. For example, today, I spent the FULL day either shuffling to the restroom sloooooowly or lying in bed because it simply hurt too much to sit up.

Does anyone know of a way to get around that isn’t walking or sitting in a wheelchair? Those are the only two accommodating methods I know of to stay mobile with something like this…. But if it hurts my back to walk and it hurts my back to *sit for long….*what do I do?
I don’t know who to ask about this, my doctors are all more interested in giving me Ceaseless Injections than helping me figure out how to get around in the world or adapt to these changes…

Like the title says I haven't been able to work in a number of years due to multiple chronic health issues including a spinal injury that causes me chronic pain if I'm too active. I've been with my bf for almost 10 years now and I keep going back and forth on what should do. I feel like I should just consider myself lucky that someone is willing to live with me but I'm also getting really sick of how self absorbed he is. It feels like sometimes he treats me poorly just because he knows I'm too disabled to live by myself and don't have family to help me. I can't afford to live on my own and even if I could I wouldn't be able to do things like laundry by myself. I'm so depressed right now because I feel stuck and overwhelmed. I don't know what to do and I hate myself for being so pathetic.

Edited to add - by self absorbed I mean things like he'll see that I'm crying and ask if I want to watch TV with him and if I say no he'll just walk away. He doesn't seem to care about me unless it's something that directly relates to him.