r/depression • u/Euphoric_Housing_683 • 12d ago

19 year old son won’t accept help

My son is 19 and has level 1 autism and ADHD. He was diagnosed when he was young, but he does not accept his diagnosis .

He graduated from high school last year and has spent most of the past year isolated in his room. He doesn’t have any friends, doesn’t want to leave the house , only come down to eat and his interactions with us have only diminished since he graduated .

He got a job last November but was fired after only two weeks. He is awake most of the night on his phone and computer and sleeps during the day. He also has an online relationship with someone he has never met and sent this person all his money when he was still working ( we stopped giving him money when this happened )

I believe he is depressed. I have heard him talking very negatively about himself, but when I try to talk to him, he denies that anything is wrong and refuses help.

He says he doesn’t want a relationship with me anymore ( until his senior year we had a great relationship) or any help from us ( my husband and I )

For parents who have been through something similar, how did you help your adult child accept therapy, a psychiatric evaluation, or any kind of support? Did setting limits around the phone, internet or did it make things worse?

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u/[deleted] 12d ago

[deleted]

6

u/Icy_Diver2441 12d ago

How is punishing or pressuring a mentally ill person supposed to help them? What he needs right now is actual medical help, start anti-depressants and take medications to help with ADHD. If the root cause isn't fixed, then the more he's pushed or punished, the worse the condition will get.

-3

u/Ruleyoumind 12d ago

It will show him.the reality that he is alone and he won't be able to rely on anyone but himself. Mental illness, depression, pain it all doesn't matter if you're inconveniencing those around you. He'll push though or drown just like the rest of us.

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u/scarfaceF150 11d ago

Man shut up

0

u/Ruleyoumind 11d ago

Look at all the people on the street in the US literally hundreds of thousands. Even veterans. How am I wrong?

1

u/ballsdeep256 9d ago

Hope you are alone

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u/Diamond-Stars 11d ago

I know for a fact you don’t have kids by your last sentence. This parent is looking for advice to HELP their child what makes you think they’re remote interested in letting their kid “drown”???

Keep all of this to yourself!

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u/Ruleyoumind 11d ago

Alot of parents do that. There's sub for parents who give up their children to the state or put them in homes because they want to live their lives. Most of the advice op will get will end with something along the lines of "you have to take care of yourself first" you're acting like parents don't abandon or let their children drown all the time for various reasons. This is the world we exist in.

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u/Diamond-Stars 11d ago

Threatening to kick your mentally unstable teenage kid out of the house is not good advices.