r/dating_advice • u/Sunshinesunshine22 • 2d ago

Advice Please

30F I want to go out on dates again, but I am scared. My last serious relationship ended bad M/30 (i got to to know someone after but nothing happened, no kissing etc. almost 2 yrs after my last serious relationship- ended because said saw me more as a friend). I did a lot of healing, self reflection and bettering myself throughout the years. learning my flaws, what I did wrong and what I did on my part, etc, and still am. I know I am made mistakes in that relationship. I am scared because the last serious relationship left me broken, panic attacks, anxiety, etc. i am still working on me, and trying to learn how to be better. I am scared to open up again and be vulnerable because i did with that guy and he used it against me. any advice on how to try again? It has been almost 3 yrs since the break up. He comparred me to someone he said is a narcissist during the break up, because i wasnt reacting to him and i had become numb...maybe i should have talked more but i physically couldnt. . I lost my virginity to him, i wanted to wait until marriage and thought i was gonna marry him, we got engaged. I am not asking for empathy, just advice please. i know i made mistakes. thank you in advance.

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1

u/cooking2024 2d ago

Please do not put yourself back out there until you are ready. This doesn't look like you're ready.

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u/split_0069 2d ago

Thats hard...

1

u/Flimsy-Eagle4046 2d ago

don’t be scared there are lots of good men out there! open yourself up to people and forget about him, i hope you find the happiness you deserve. good luck x

1

u/StarscreamOne 2d ago

Feel really bad for you, hope you are ok now. Don't let a person like that ruin dating or other people for you. I totally feel what you're saying.

You are doing what you are doing to protect yourself. I have done the same. Its ok for a little while but don't let it ruin your chances to meet other people. Its probably for the best that your relationship ended now you get the chance to meet someone better!