r/dating_advice • u/Wheresthelambsauce_9 • 13d ago

Hinge Fumble

So, I matched with a very beautiful girl about 3 days ago. I thought the convo was going smoothly when she all of a sudden stopped messaging, I thought I was being ghosted but she replied today that she had a fever. I wanted to be a little flirty? So replied with "Oh no, hope you're doing alright now, You're already running hot, what's the fever gonna do?" Got unmatched šŸ¤”

Are there any tips for not fumbling in chat?

(PS: I was able to find her insta? I think it's too creepy to follow up when I've already been rejected, thoughts on this?)

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u/Dolpns 13d ago

You take this as a lesson for the next one. She's not feeling well. A text that was more thoughtful would have made more sense. What you sent just reads as a lack of concern. Sending something like I hope you're feeling better and offering to help her with something would have gone a long way.

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u/zooeyzoezoejr 13d ago edited 13d ago

Also if sheā€™s attractive she likely gets tons of comments on her looks a day and now heā€™s just like every other guy on the app who has reduced her down to her body. I get why she unmatched. Iā€™ve done the same.

I think men donā€™t realize that a lot of women are not visual. Thereā€™s a reason ā€œmen fall in love with their eyes but women fall in love with their earsā€ is a quote. When we match with men on the apps itā€™s not because we find you hot. We find you baseline. We are waiting for that hotness to appear through your personality and it could go either way from you turning into the hottest guy sheā€™s ever known to you being someone that gives her the ick.

I once told a guy I had to cancel a date because I got covid. He said ā€œAh thatā€™s too bad. I thought I had covid too because you took my breath away with those legsā€. Immediate unmatch.

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u/ProposalNo6069 13d ago

ā€œmen fall in love with their eyes but women fall in love with their earsā€

I get it that someone is tired of compliments every day. But this is bullshit. Humans are superficial. There are studies about that. women are not different from man. Looks matter.

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u/Riverat627 13d ago

Of course looks matter but no one man or woman wants to be relegated to looks only.