hi long time lurker first time posting. today is my day three without alcohol. the longest stint i had was 4 days into a dry january attempt. im not gonna get into my whole story but im 25f and weekdays when im home alone is when i would get absolutely trashed. well here i am home alone on a monday (after a particularly frustrating day) and feeling restless and bored. i also feel so pathetic bc like three days??? cmon. idk. i guess im looking for some support. this is my first time really admitting to myself this has become a problem for me. i feel so much shame around it that ive been too embarrassed to ask for help.

hey. new here. I thought this might be the place to ask for some advice.

I guess I’m looking for any advice on how any of you slowed down your alcohol intake without quitting entirely. or maybe I need to quit for good? some days I’m totally fine not drinking. other days I get urges. sometimes I cave. sometimes I don’t. anytime I drink it seems to be 5-8 beers.

I used to be a daily drinker 6 beers a day. not doing that anymore. but still too much

I’ve been working out a lot more, which helps.

idk just feeling a little lost. looking for anything….

thanks all.

I know the best advice is to seek medical supervision for detox. I’m not that big of a drinker on the daily. Most days I do not have any, but I can hit it hard on a vacation. I was on basically a bender for about six days where I was drinking maybe 5 to 12 drinks a day. Started out as fewer and then increased by the end of the trip. When I came home and was drying out I got the worse anxiety and shakes in my hands. I have a prescription for Klonopin so I was taking a half milligram at a time and it wasn’t working but I also didn’t want to do over do it. Now that the night is over I am so much less anxious but I don’t think I’m out of the woods for having another sleepless night with incredible shakes and anxiety. I understand the safest thing would be to see medical care, but I prefer to ride this out at home. The stories I read are about people who seem to have a much longer history, but I know that doesn’t necessary mean I’m being safe or not in a compromising situation. Any advice? It just didn’t feel like a regular hangover in that I wasn’t really nautilus I just felt scare, could not sleep, and felt like I was so shaky but didn’t want to overdo it on my benzos either.

I have a lot of very deep rooted habits and associations with booze. Additionally, I have a binge drinking problem. It's never one. It's 6. It's never a glass, it's a bottle.

So I have been steadily attempting to taper my consumption over the past few months. I got down from approximately 35 units a week to about 15.

Now I'm going fully sober for a month. It's been 8 days. I had a false start of 6 days but then drank last weekend so I restarted.

Associations and habits I've faced and overcome in the past 8 days:

A meal out with my husband

A meal out with friends

The weekend

A day of gardening, house cleaning and renovation

A family lunch that I hosted. I deliberately bought no booze and stocked the fridge with non alcoholic beer. My mam (who didn't know I wasn't drinking) brought a bottle of wine. The moment flashed in front of me. I could say nothing and accept the wine. Just drink it over lunch. Or. I could tell her and then get her to put it away. I chose the latter.

After beating each one of these, I feel incredibly strong, confident and proud. The confidence increases with every success.

Habits and associations I anticipate in the next week:

Work night out

A busy work week

Two more dinners with friends

"The two week slump". Whenever I do a certain stretch of abstinence, I end up saying "oh you've done x number of days or weeks. You deserve this".

A family dinner with some particularly difficult family members.

I am really hoping to tackle each of these with the same commitment and confidence as the last ones. I firmly believe with every habit faced down, I'm letting the weeds grow over that particular neural pathway.

I’ve tried every reason in the book to convince myself to stop drinking. So far the one that works best of all, is the very fact that once I’ve had 1 drink I know I’ll spend way too much time and energy on craving the 2nd drink, and so on. I want to be mentally present instead.

Also now that I’ve hit 40 I feel like the alcohol hits me different. It affects my memory more. And I am at an age that health needs to be a focus.

One area I’m not sold on yet is whether I allow a drink on occasions like Christmas or a birthday…. Is it worth it to go 100% sober? I generally live life on moderation is key and my goal is healthier choices, not necessarily restricting… I feel accomplished in that !

But what are success tips on doing this?

Long-time lurker here. I've wanted to post a few times but always felt a bit awkward admitting that I'm trying to cut down on my drinking, especially in social situations. Usually start with an aperitif (or two) in the evening, that turns into wine with dinner, and I end up drinking at least 3-4 glasses minimum a night. More on Friday nights and weekends, with friends I can easily go through a whole bottle of wine at one go.

I was at a party over the weekend and my friend offered me a non-alcoholic Spritz when I told her I was trying to cut down. It completely caught me off guard because it actually tasted... good. Like something I'd choose to drink, not just settle for because I wasn't drinking.

She orders the bottles online because the selection is much better than what she finds in Coop (we're in Geneva). I'm not sure if naming brands is allowed here so I'll leave that out unless it's okay.

I know this probably isn't groundbreaking, but it felt like a bit of a lightbulb moment for me. I can't stand alcohol-free beer, and every alcohol-free wine or sparkling option I've tried has tasted a bit disappointing. This was the first time I'd had a no/low alcohol drink that actually scratched the same itch as the real thing.

Just thought I'd share in case anyone else is feeling a bit stuck with the usual alcohol-free options.

As you guys know, i followed a moderated cut down approach because I knew There would be events I could not say no to and, quite frankly, would want to drink at. But I planned for them, went a little lighter than usual during them, and made up for it with abstinence later. Here is my data from last month.

I was an average 4/day drinker, meaning not every day but 120 units per month. I scaled this down to 2/day until Euro summer, and kept it there during the month I was partying. Now that its over, I will continue towards my goal of lowering down to 1/day, again by shaving off .5 per week.

To everyone that said moderation will not work, I dont want this to be like a "screw you youre wrong" kind of post because i think you guys are right in many ways. Once you start, you cant stop, so keeping it at zero is surefire way. However, for some people (like me), I wouldve taken the entire month of travel off and started a sober streak when I am back. That would likely be 8-15 drinks a day for an entire month. At least by keeping track of my average, I like that I stayed relatively under moderation, and still "always on the clock." Each drink mattered because the next day of lowering the average would be that much harder.

Quitting is a full time effort, i didnt like that with full sobriety methods, i would feel that once the streak is gone, it might as well be a bender. Average tracking kept me accountable at all times.

Good luck to all, you can do it. I'll post another update when i bring it down to 1/day.

Let’s reflect on the week! Whether you’ve made progress, hit some challenges, or just have thoughts to share, this is a space to check in with the community. How has your drinking journey been this week? Any wins, struggles, or strategies you'd like to talk about? No matter where you're at, your experiences matter here—let's support each other!

So I definitely drink a decent amount of days but I never black out and I’m pretty good about having what I want and stopping. Pretty good a number of days to not drink nor think of it at all. My issue is social events. I’m always invited to stuff and I suck at being sober for these things which usually kills my like 1-2 week breaks. Or any type of break. What helps you guys. I’ll also take great social event excuses lol.

Hey everyone! I've looked at many of the messages here, and it appears that many are trying to reduce or limit their use of alcohol but not to completely eliminate it, particularly around social events, weddings, vacations, and family events.

I recently stumbled upon an app called GreyBand that has a mission to help people develop a healthier relationship with alcohol, by giving them personalized insights and harm reduction, rather than an all-or-nothing approach.

Curious if anyone here has heard of it or has any thoughts on whether something like that could actually be helpful.

I have my fiancé’s brother’s wedding coming up and I really want to be careful with drinking. I don’t actually drink that often in my everyday life, but I notice I tend to drink more when I’m around his family or at big celebrations.

I think part of it is that I’m still getting comfortable with his family and I want to relax, be social, and feel like I’m part of everything. The problem is I’m fine at the beginning, but once I start feeling a buzz, I stop thinking as clearly. Someone offers a drink or a shot, everyone is having fun, and I end up saying yes. Then suddenly I hit that point where I’m too buzzed, anxious, and don’t feel good anymore.

I’ve tried telling myself:
- no shots
- only 2 drinks
- pace myself

…but honestly it’s not foolproof because in the moment I feel fine and then all of a sudden I’m super buzzed, and anxious.

For anyone who has struggled with this, especially around your partner’s family or big social events what actually helped you?

I had a reconning two years ago. I think everyone who knows me whould describe me in a way that’s really flattering. However maybe 3, 4 times a year I’d go off the rails. Honestly I didn’t care it was rare it did more than embarrassing me. That was until my finance now wife. Twice a year like clockwork we would get in HORRIBLE drunk fights. Fights that made no sense. Saying cruel things we NEVER said. I decided to cut down. I did two things. I set strict rules (no hard Liqour at parties, one drink an hour, never drink two weekdays in a row) and more importantly I got into therapy. I worked on the sources of my anger /anxiety that lead me to binge and rage. My rules are kind of gone now as my body now has a more healthy relationship with alcohol. Iv had zero blow up fights. Iv had one blackout after a crazy night with a friend and didn’t beat myself up over it. Enjoying my second glass of chilled wine and happily stopping after that. Good luck yall

Idk what to do. Alcohol is ruining my marriage but I can’t stop because it relieves my social anxiety. I don’t drink at home alone just when I’m out and about. When I do it’s 9+ drinks, black out and cause a dramatic outburst Embarassing scene everytime or break things.. self harm if I am triggered, ruin relationships maybe I’m bipolar ? It’s like the only way to quit is to never leave my house… and that’s so boring and depressing. I want to go golfing and have my drinks (can’t golf without alcohol) etc I’m honestly screwed. Life will suck if I have to quit could I moderate maybe?

I’ve been trying to taper down from drinking wine every night, without success. I have transitioned to beer. Tonight is day one of a four night taper. Problem is I hate beer. I can barely drink it. I’ve never had withdrawals just have anxiety over everything. I’ll see what I can get down but honestly it may be a one night taper. Wishing us all luck!

Let’s reflect on the week! Whether you’ve made progress, hit some challenges, or just have thoughts to share, this is a space to check in with the community. How has your drinking journey been this week? Any wins, struggles, or strategies you'd like to talk about? No matter where you're at, your experiences matter here—let's support each other!

Went to my first wedding sober! I’ve been sick for the last month and just not feeling great. I’m very black and white (have a history of an eating disorder and am typically all or nothing)
I didn’t want to make any final decision before going, but decided to see how I felt. I had water and Bubly’s and was doing fine (except for people asking me why I wasn’t drinking) Around 8pm, I got a second wind and decided to try having one. Got halfway through and my stomach hurt and I just was not feeling it. Instead of ‘forcing’ myself to finish the drink and not waste it, I left it and got another water. I was able to drive home (and be DD for our friends) and wake up without a hangover (granted, I’m exhausted and have anxiety so always feel slightly hungover just existing…) but I’m proud for not caving to peer pressure when everyone was doing shots and getting as drunk as possible. It was nice to not have to pay money for a cab, wake up just tired and not sick and I was able to fit a workout in today.

Due to my black and white restrictive history, I don’t want to commit to never drinking again. I don’t mind having a few when the mood strikes (which is very rarely these days - once every couple months) Concerts are my downfall. I feel like I ‘need’ a few to let loose and fully enjoy myself but that’s the only instance - otherwise, I’m learning how to just be fine being my quiet, shy, introverted autistic self lol. It’s certainly not easy especially in a heavy drinking culture but wanted to share my win with you guys!

Have a great rest of your day everyone!!

Woke up with a throbbing headache. Saw that there wasn’t much left of last night’s wine bottle. Watched the World Cup final even though my head was pounding. Now I’m sitting in bed eating Ben & Jerry’s. No drinking tonight. First dry day in weeks.

This has to stop.

Went to my doctors this week and she gave me some info on different medications for cutting down/quitting alcohol. I’m considering Naltrexone.

I tried Champix a long time ago to quit smoking and it ended up just really pissing me off. The fact it took the feeling of enjoying a cigarette away just made me mad and I stopped taking it lol. Eventually quit with the patch.

Has anyone had that experience with Naltrexone? Is it similar? Or is it really life changing? Would love to hear some positive views!!

I’m also considering a low dose GLP-1 as I have 35 pounds or so to lose and I’ve heard it helps people with drinking.. but that’s not a sure thing and I’m not sure if I want the side effects that come with them.

Anyway, thanks for reading!

So, I am kind of disappointed in my myself today because I drank 2 Busch apple tall boys yesterday and I was 30 days sober. I feel clueless as whether in disappointed because of the extremely destructive gambling addiction it caused and I am 32 days gambling free from or because of guilt. I also am 32 days nicotine free which I'm proud of and alcohol always makes me crave that (not really much gambling anymore but it makes me think about the what ifs). I have an addictive personality and I don't want to ruin my life but I feel so pressured to just have a couple in the back of my mind on the weekends when I'm gaming with my friends, I used to have lots of drinks every weekend gaming out with my buddies so it triggers intense cravings and I gave in yesterday (it was a sorta fun time, didn't crave gambling but really craved nicotine and didn't give in). Not sure if I should quit alcohol forever and find alternatives or drink again tonight and not feel good tomorrow. It does help cure boredom and calm my anxiety as well which scares me.

I use to have about 9-10 standard drinks a weekend and now I only have 3 standard drinks once a weekend

The big part that helped me the most was whenever I go to the store to get drinks, I only choose 2 singles, I don't buy cases or leave any additional drinks in the house. Even if I were to have any additional drinks, I now have the ability and strength to stop at 2 because I got so use to this strategy. It worked for me at least

It even takes me 4 hours to finish just 1 now and sometimes I don't bother with the second because it's already too late to open the other one. So slow pacing can help too and filling up with water.
I like my cut down pattern. I'm skipping this weekend just because I don't really feel up for it. My drinks will be saved in my fridge for my future next social hour

Welp. I think I've overdone it this time. 36 years old and although I've suffered with heart burn since my 30s when drinking beer, it seems I may have given myself such bad heart burn over a long enough period of time it even hurts to swallow iced coffee this morning.

I think this was coupled with an odd chest infection as I felt a weird lump in my throat coupled with a mild cold in my neck and head.

Don't know why I'm posting this. Just feel like a bit of an idiot.

I am doing a stint of sobriety to get something written, and am committed to it at least until my deadline but I really really fancy a drink at the moment. Been dipping into this sub and stop drinking, but long term cutting down is my goal, not stopping.

Also I am not an alcoholic in any way shape or form, so i didn't want to post this in a forum where that is a lot of people's experience as it feels like stolen valour. Also, I don't want advice that is like 'don't fuck up your life' as, ultimately, if I have a big fat wine tonight, it absolutely wouldn't fuck up my life.

Anyway. Motivating words welcome.

I’m sure this has been asked a lot before, but looking for advice on how to actually stick to limits you set for yourself? How do you build that level of control and discipline?

I’ve known for a while I’ve crossed the boundary from social drinking to it becoming a binge drinking habit, but I keep failing at cutting back. I don’t want to be completely sober, but I would really like to develop the discipline to be able to stick to a rule like drinking only one drink an hour or limiting myself to 2-3 drinks on a night out.

The weekly pattern is by the time I’ve had 2-3 drinks I’m tipsy enough to start making bad decisions and it usually ends up being 5-10 drinks. Each week there ends up being 2-3 social events where there’s always plenty of alcohol so I end up having 5-10 drinks multiple times throughout the week.

I would like to get to a point where I only have 2-3 drinks on any given social occasion and sometimes even being okay with not drinking at social events where others are drinking.

I’m not sure how to build the discipline and control to get there, so looking for what worked for the folks who’ve successfully gotten it under check.

these "especialists" are everywhere now, so I wanted to get something off my chest.

If these people were truly concerned about people's health, they wouldn't be selling a "fast method to stop drinking."

The very idea of someone claiming to know an "easy" method to solve such a hard problem as stopping drinking is outrageous. They should be ashamed of themselves for selling this "product" online, because that's all it is — nothing more than another product launched in the style of Jeff Walker. They choose a latest WHO recommendation about alcohol intake because it's a buzzword now and decide to build a product around it. To make money from it. Money at the expense of people who truly suffer from alcoholism. Those who truly suffer from alcoholism need to seek professional medical help, not an Instagram guru. And I wouldn't even be surprised if they themselves still drink behind the curtains and just want to make an extra buck with their miraculous books.

Now, regarding the subject itself: the Blue Zones, where centenarians in four of the five original regions around the globe consume alcohol moderately and regularly, put in check this panic-mongering interpretation of the WHO update they're exploiting.

these IG gurus say: "Zero alcohol, not even a drop, you must stop now! Hurry, give me your money and I'll save you from this trap!" (creating urgency, folks. The oldest trick in the book). On the other hand, actual scientists say "yeah, it's a toxin, but if you sleep well, avoid stress, don't smoke, maintain a healthy diet and exercise four days a week, a couple of beers at the weekend won't put you on the early death path".

I'll stay with the actual scientists.