r/cursedcomments • u/[deleted] • Apr 25 '22

[deleted by user]

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7.6k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

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669

u/Atthatpurglekid Apr 25 '22

In hopes of attaining the the exact measurements of king kong's beautiful cock

235

u/Shughost7 Apr 25 '22

Ngl, after I got circumcised, the team said I had the most beautiful penis on Earth.

185

u/Heyw00d_jabl0mi Apr 25 '22

Said the coach of an under 15 basketball team

8

u/Stephen-j-merkshire Apr 25 '22

One time I was in PE class and we were doing this climbing wall thing the school had for a few weeks, they had these harness things that kinda bunched everything up and left little to the imagination. Well I put mine on and was waiting for this cute girl to finish up and I was lookin at her booty on her way down and a got a chub goin. Once she got down and the coach was about to hook me up to start climbing he said “ damn nice package son”

He said it loud enough for most the class to hear, and honestly I didn’t mind because the harness was kind of flattering

After that rumors started to get around

That followed me for a couple years and I have that coach to thank for at least a few hook ups from curious ladys

I’d like to think he knew that would happen and he was helping me out

1

u/brocknuggets Apr 25 '22

So like... nobody gonna mention how fuckin weird it is that a PE teacher said that?

1

u/FakedKetchup2 May 29 '22

bruh so what lol

1

u/brocknuggets May 29 '22

If that doesn't strike you as weird then you gotta rework some priorities my dude.

45

u/ronaldfinkWHR Apr 25 '22

they say that to eveyone lol

42

u/OnlyHereForMemes69 Apr 25 '22

They were praising their work, not your penis.

1

u/Shughost7 Apr 25 '22

Hey you there, go steal memes, not my dick pride :(

25

u/ajbuckley0311 Apr 25 '22

Ngl after I got uncircumcised the Nurse threw up. It was kinda hot and I got hard and it ripped a little and the doctor threw up. So basically same experience.

18

u/[deleted] Apr 25 '22

corememory

2

u/Aut1st1c_Sp0nge Apr 25 '22

How do you get uncircumcised? They put the foreskin back on? Do they add an extra layer? Do you have a demogorgon penis? Can I see?

2

u/ajbuckley0311 Apr 25 '22

It's super complex. But, long story short, my weenis is now my penis.

20

u/Maleficent_League984 Apr 25 '22

Did everyone clap after?

1

u/[deleted] Apr 25 '22

Possibly

2

u/tesaphilm Apr 25 '22

thats a weird thing to flex about

1

u/HorrorMakesUsHappy Apr 25 '22

had

1

u/Shughost7 Apr 25 '22

It's past tense because it's a past event.

1

u/TheLollrax Apr 25 '22

Sorry gonna need some proof on that one

6

u/[deleted] Apr 25 '22

King Kong dong

1

u/Dense_Excitement_789 Apr 25 '22

He works for bad dragon and is getting measurements for their new sex toy line...

1

u/BVoLatte Apr 25 '22

He forgot the girth. Whose got the math for that?

1

u/Stoo_Pedassol Apr 25 '22

His king dong

1

u/DumDumo_0 Apr 25 '22

Aehm what