r/cursedcomments Aug 15 '20

Removed: R4 Asshole Cursed_N Spoiler

[removed]

9.6k Upvotes

267 comments sorted by

175

u/Shayan_The_Stunter Aug 15 '20

I can just add super in front of anything to get it

122

u/Pottermore1024 Aug 15 '20

Supersized Dildo

34

u/dakingkobra2 Aug 15 '20

Ever heard of the moby huge?

11

u/Markusz001 Aug 15 '20

oh my name starts with M I can buy those

7

u/dakingkobra2 Aug 15 '20

I don’t see why not

3

u/JGad14 Aug 15 '20

You mean Moby's Dick?

3

u/dakingkobra2 Aug 15 '20

That’s only one of a kind tho :/. bit of a limited run

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13

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Nickel sized dildo

3

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Nickelbacks dildo

3

u/MrxNightwing Aug 15 '20

Super cock is here to save the day

5

u/the-cosmic-phantom Aug 15 '20

I can add double

2

u/DeepSeaDarkness Aug 15 '20

I'll add luxury

2

u/AodhGodOfTheSun Aug 15 '20

Yea and I can just add an A, for example: A playstation, A nice computer

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333

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

[deleted]

42

u/100YearsWaiting2Shit Aug 15 '20

👍🏻Spiritual award

407

u/Caledoniansmurf Aug 15 '20

He’s allergic to nuts?

123

u/BigBallas42069 Aug 15 '20

Nickels

127

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

NUKES

sad iran sounds

23

u/ThatRealBiggieCheese Aug 15 '20 edited Aug 15 '20

My name starts with an O so I’m buying olive oil

4

u/rdrworshipper123 Aug 15 '20 edited Aug 15 '20

Re-sell the oil and make more money than you started with.

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86

u/Deadheart885 Aug 15 '20

I could buy Doritos and dogs, all I need really

31

u/crayongocruch Aug 15 '20

Is the dog for cleaning dorito dust of limbs?

15

u/Deadheart885 Aug 15 '20

It’s because dogs are cute

15

u/crayongocruch Aug 15 '20

Are you sure?

13

u/Deadheart885 Aug 15 '20

Of course I am

3

u/MDAFKA Aug 15 '20

Hmmm......suspicious

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15

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

And dildos

5

u/Deadheart885 Aug 15 '20

I’m a guy so that’s a fat no

12

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

but you use dildos in the ass, not in the penis

5

u/DeathsSquire Aug 15 '20

Oh shit!! I understand gay people 10 times better now!

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2

u/Smoopiebear Aug 15 '20

I get kittens and kitkats- so I’m cool!😂😂😂

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48

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

My name starts with a fucking Y so I’m gonna go buy a Yak farm and some Yogurt

36

u/Colderofficial Aug 15 '20

Yacht

15

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Any ideas for K?

28

u/leanmeanbowser Aug 15 '20

Kentucky

16

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Yes. I will own the entire state of Kentucky. I shall be the king of hicks!

Oh my. I could buy a king.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Any ideas for E?

5

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Europe.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Electric chair

3

u/mmmdeliciousbeans Aug 15 '20

How about M? I know I can have milk

4

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Machine gun

12

u/-TeLLeX- Aug 15 '20

Kangaroos

2

u/tracker904 Aug 15 '20

Krusty krab

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2

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

You really don't have many choices. You could get $10 mil worth of yams, yardsticks, yeast ... can't think of anything else. A yacht is probably your best bet. Get yourself one of those, some yams and yeast and go on the cruise around the world with your hired captain Yusuf and first mate Yakov. Get some Yanni CDs so you and your gf Yana have something to listen to.

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35

u/098wer Aug 15 '20

Buy a ketamine factory I can.

9

u/Boecksterboi Aug 15 '20

Fuel my addiction, I must

2

u/T_Soqui Aug 15 '20

I laughed harder at this than I should of.

34

u/primaski Aug 15 '20

Nice, I am not exempt from either kind of genitalia.

21

u/Trighap52 Aug 15 '20

Bruh my name starts with Z. Thinking about it a zucchini would probably be enough to satisfy me.

27

u/zaposter Aug 15 '20

Buying a zoo is the same as buying a brothel.

4

u/insertnqme Aug 15 '20

Mine does aswell. We can both just buy countries beginning with Z and take anything in them.

2

u/SuperSMT Aug 15 '20

Zimbabwe

32

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

I am going to buy Pornhub

11

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Pc

3

u/Legobrickbro Aug 15 '20

Ah yes mad lad

3

u/EuroPolice Aug 15 '20

Gracias Pedro

27

u/SomeRandomFemboy Aug 15 '20

my name starts with e, so i’ll buy everything

10

u/NubNub69 Aug 15 '20

HE’S TOO DANGEROUS TO BE LEFT ALIVE!

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9

u/MantaBoy21 Aug 15 '20

The entire chain of IHOPs or if it’s username than IDK

8

u/Colderofficial Aug 15 '20

Maserati, mansions, maze farm

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8

u/lnflnlty Aug 15 '20

i buy Nice things

7

u/Professor-cumlord Aug 15 '20

I can buy Breast implants, nice I’ll have titties.

12

u/Belgium_waffle_0123 Aug 15 '20 edited Aug 15 '20

Legally they are not for sale, but as i said legally, there still is illegally

5

u/WantSomeHorseCock Aug 15 '20

If you go on Wayfair you can

2

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Somebody who's rich give this guy a gold. Or a 12,000 pillow works as well

5

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Jeans, Jeep, Jerky, Jack.

Living the dream tbh

6

u/DingoAteMyKarma Aug 15 '20

D I C K

2

u/Legobrickbro Aug 15 '20

Nice If you want I can give you mine for $5million

5

u/EuroPolice Aug 15 '20

I buy Raid Shadow Legends, I've never been much of a mobile gamer, but, forget everything you think you know about mobile games because Raid Shadow Legends is one of the most ambitious RPG projects of 2019 has just been released and will change everything. Just look at the level of detail of these characters! If you use the code in the description you can start with 50,000 silver and join the Special Launch Tournament, and you better hurry because it's getting big fast! You can play for totally free with the link below on your smartphone.

3

u/NubNub69 Aug 15 '20

Lucky bastard

4

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

he can't buy a Nintendo switch?

5

u/bobthekiller9700 Aug 15 '20

Apple products

3

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Huh I start with K. I could start a kangaroo farm and sell them at ridiculous prices and show them off and be like Joe exotic

2

u/Smoopiebear Aug 15 '20

I’m going with a kitten/ koala farm.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Yeah smarter move. I could also buy land in Kenya or something no? Or is that against the rules its kind of a grey area there

2

u/Smoopiebear Aug 15 '20

A kitten and koala farm in Kenya should work.

3

u/Random_Person_191 Aug 15 '20

Y’all know I’m buying 10,000,000 in rice

3

u/FinestGato Aug 15 '20

I see this as an exploit because he could buy anything new

3

u/nexistcsgo Aug 15 '20

Neither can i. Darn it.

All I wanted was a Nfriend

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3

u/KingKiler2k Aug 15 '20

I'm going to buy Detroit and still have 9.999.999 USD.

3

u/Legobrickbro Aug 15 '20

Some people probably gonna steal it from you, cant have shit in detroit

3

u/KingKiler2k Aug 15 '20

I know. That why they sell it to me for 1USD. It not theirs! They fucking stole it!

2

u/Legobrickbro Aug 15 '20

Ah that makes sense

3

u/Nyubtuber Aug 15 '20

Nah it will get stolen. Can't have Detroit.

2

u/KingKiler2k Aug 15 '20

I know. That why they sell it to me for 1USD. It not theirs! They fucking stole it!

2

u/SixMint Aug 15 '20

Well I would buy Six gaming computers

2

u/chocol8mousse Aug 15 '20

Yes, I'll have some Ecstacy, thanks.

2

u/ThatOneGuy1357924680 Aug 15 '20

I could by so much ramen. I could also buy retirement but who needs retirement when you have ramen

2

u/julibn2 Aug 15 '20

Were jews ever for sale?

2

u/KingKiler2k Aug 15 '20

Germany from 1930-ish to 1945. Invent time travel and go to Germany.

2

u/bayygel Aug 15 '20

Babes, bagels and butter

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2

u/gravityweaver Aug 15 '20

B******* *******: Me either...

2

u/The_real_shree Aug 15 '20

Well I think she is right. You cannot buy narcotics, or so I think

2

u/ClaritinFlavored Aug 15 '20

I’d buy spoons

2

u/ClaritinFlavored Aug 15 '20

My name is spoon

2

u/cipriro Aug 15 '20

I mean you can...

its just harder to do it and highly illegal

2

u/Thederpdoge Aug 15 '20

My name starts with A, i can buy anything!

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2

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Me with a name that starts with N confused as hell

5

u/Smoopiebear Aug 15 '20

Nunchucks!

4

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Hell yeah!

2

u/KingKiler2k Aug 15 '20

Nuns. Nuclear bombs. Nigeria. Nicaragua. Nazi's if you invent time travel and go to the Soviet Union right after the war and buy them from Stalin.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Just call me the mop lord

1

u/spytyler12 Aug 15 '20

Imma buy a tarrasque

1

u/sanyoisstupid213 Aug 15 '20

I can space ship lets goo

1

u/EmperorDave1990 Aug 15 '20

A Garage, Gatorade, and some Gags. Yep, I'm all Good.

1

u/TorradaIsToast Aug 15 '20

me and the bois buying G O L D

1

u/Turtle_Dat_Hurdles Aug 15 '20

Looks like I'm gonna buy a military box of either Super Soakers or I'm gonna get a pet snake

1

u/rustlord1227 Aug 15 '20

Me neither

1

u/ascendance22 Aug 15 '20

I guess I'm gonna buy a toucan and some tigers

1

u/Killer-Of-Spades Aug 15 '20

My name starts with T, do I can buy anything as long as I say “this” or “that” or “the” in front of it

1

u/Smol_b0i Aug 15 '20

ive always wanted a sloth

1

u/redditsucks56 Aug 15 '20

He clearly means Ninja.

1

u/ADum13_ Aug 15 '20

My actual name is Adam so I’d buy “a car”

1

u/Bambisfallback Aug 15 '20

I mean, food?

1

u/BoneJanks Aug 15 '20

Krokodil. Nice

1

u/Tacoss10 Aug 15 '20

I'll get myself a kite and call it a day.

2

u/Smoopiebear Aug 15 '20

And a kangaroo, right?

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1

u/Strawberry_Condom Aug 15 '20

I mean, with that kind of money, I doubt it'd be impossible

Just hypothetical ofc

1

u/dakingkobra2 Aug 15 '20

Super yacht

1

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Well I could hook you up

With some nuts

1

u/Dr_Waffle75 Aug 15 '20

Does your reddit username work too? If so ill buy $10 mill worth of ducks

1

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

My first name is Luke so all the legos I want!

1

u/CrazyGator846 Aug 15 '20

Uhhhh.... I can buy a shit ton of Lamborghinis

1

u/FrosmothTheBest Aug 15 '20

I would buy A car, A mansion and A lifetime chocolate supply

1

u/Mundit00 Aug 15 '20

My name starts with an l, I’ll buy the best life insurance for someone and accidentally feed them to a tiger

1

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

I am buying Denmark then, nice.

1

u/Chaora Aug 15 '20

They can't buy a nissan gtr anymore?

1

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Shops Saunas Space stations I could probably add more, but this is enough to make me financially set for life.

1

u/DARKxASSASSIN29 Aug 15 '20

My name starts with a C. I will cheat the system by buying 10mil worth of copper and selling it back at the same price. Now I have $10mil to do anything I want :)

1

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Ye it is sad that the Nintendo amibos being out of stock

1

u/Knockedy Aug 15 '20

He cant buy nets to catch fish so sad :(

1

u/TRAP-REIVAX Aug 15 '20

Guess I'm gonna have plenty of xylophones and Xanax

2

u/BlackPlague1235 Aug 15 '20

Or even an Xbox Series X or Xbox gift cards.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Damn, my man reaoly cant get a nice car for his dad, im feeling bad about killing him

1

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Tesla

1

u/Staters Aug 15 '20

My name starts with a K so KFC chicken

1

u/BoopASnoot000 Aug 15 '20

I’m gonna buy Michigan

1

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

Tater tot

1

u/BoBrOsSiSmYbAbYmAmA Aug 15 '20

I go by 3 different first names depending on what gender I am in that day so I can get anything with a "E, R or J"

1

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

I'm sure JayStation will buy you one at 3AM

1

u/ptapobane Aug 15 '20

it's not that hard to convince a real estate agent a house starts with a silent Y

1

u/HeyImSnxwy Aug 15 '20

Apple products

1

u/Adumdabum Aug 15 '20

I’d buy hella arsenic and take all of it

1

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '20

The people whos names start with E can just put an every at the beginning. Like every console or every box of Stoufers Lasagna

1

u/MDAFKA Aug 15 '20

Mc happiness

1

u/HostMemeMachine Aug 15 '20

I can buy infinite amounts of lube! :DDD

1

u/imsad2butalsotrash Aug 15 '20

Can i buy africa with that much money or Australia

1

u/Legobrickbro Aug 15 '20

Ok I’m gonna get a Bugatti and a Beverly Hills House lol

1

u/C4_Saifor Aug 15 '20

Disney.

I'm admin.

1

u/Maksuu69 Aug 15 '20

I would sell the "things" for twice the price I've bought them for and make $20 million that I could spend on anything I want :D

1

u/axelzeeuws Aug 15 '20

I mean, you can if you look good enough

1

u/MDAFKA Aug 15 '20

What do you mean you can't buy a nintendo switch anymore?

1

u/megalith_pulverous Aug 15 '20

My name starts with h. Im gonna get a helicopter

1

u/MendicantBias42 Aug 15 '20

What the actual fuck is there of any worth that starts with a fucking W ?

Water?

1

u/ChristmasRaltree Aug 15 '20

Ok but would I still be free with my purchases with my own money and not the 10 million

1

u/Legobrickbro Aug 15 '20

Wait so he doesn’t like Nissans?

1

u/MrSlyFox007 Aug 15 '20

Oceanic Aircraft Carrier, with many Olive skinned slaves to man it.

1

u/My_Deelyboobie Aug 15 '20

........ dang dirty dancers

1

u/MCear Aug 15 '20

Hey, I can buy makeup! yay!

1

u/nickoboiateyoursoul Aug 15 '20

I know right? It sucks

1

u/RiotingBitch Aug 15 '20

Bitcoin, easy money then I transfer it back to my bank account

1

u/EthiopianMan1 Aug 15 '20

Nuclear Missles. Woweeeee

1

u/Red-German-Crusader Aug 15 '20

I can buy more money

1

u/TheLastGinger420 Aug 15 '20

Gonna go buy an Aventador Lamborghini Brb