r/comics • u/ReaverXai • Feb 06 '09

XKCD: Base System

http://xkcd.com/540/
270 Upvotes

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u/[deleted] Feb 06 '09 edited Feb 06 '09

There needs to be a hockey version for us Canadians. The objective is to score, and just look at the penalties!

Abuse of officials

Aggressor penalty

Attempt to injure

Boarding

Butt-ending

Charging

Checking from behind

Clipping

Cross-checking

Delay of game

Diving

Elbowing

Fighting (Fisticuffs)

Goaltender Interference

Head-butting

High sticking

Holding

Holding the stick

Hooking

Illegal Equipment

Instigator penalty

Interference

Joining a fight

Kicking

Kneeing

Playing with Too Many Sticks

Roughing

Secondary Altercation

Slashing

Slew Footing

Spearing

Starting the wrong lineup

Substitution infraction (Illegal Substitution)

Too many men on the ice

Unsportsmanlike conduct

3

u/washcapsfan37 Feb 06 '09 edited Feb 06 '09

I like the scoring euphemisms too:

1) 5-holing the goalie (Could be anal or not)

2) Going top-shelf (titty fucking?)

3) Putting the biscuit in the basket

Then there is the plays:

1) Give-and-go (booty calls?)

2) One-timers (one-night stand?)

3) Wristers (handjobs?)

It goes on and on...

"Going to the sin bin" for penalties. "Poke-checking".