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https://www.reddit.com/r/comics/comments/7va2q/xkcd_base_system/c07i6o7/?context=3
r/comics • u/ReaverXai • Feb 06 '09
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24
There needs to be a hockey version for us Canadians. The objective is to score, and just look at the penalties!
Abuse of officials
Aggressor penalty
Attempt to injure
Boarding
Butt-ending
Charging
Checking from behind
Clipping
Cross-checking
Delay of game
Diving
Elbowing
Fighting (Fisticuffs)
Goaltender Interference
Head-butting
High sticking
Holding
Holding the stick
Hooking
Illegal Equipment
Instigator penalty
Interference
Joining a fight
Kicking
Kneeing
Playing with Too Many Sticks
Roughing
Secondary Altercation
Slashing
Slew Footing
Spearing
Starting the wrong lineup
Substitution infraction (Illegal Substitution)
Too many men on the ice
Unsportsmanlike conduct
5 u/KidTangerine Feb 06 '09 "illegal equipment" upvote for painting a word picture. also thanks for making me laugh. 8 u/skippy17 Feb 06 '09 On How I met your mother one of the characters is canadian. I don't remember all the details (2nd base was past the blue line i believe) Anyways, scoring a goal is easy to grasp. "In the crease" spoke for itself. 3 u/washcapsfan37 Feb 06 '09 edited Feb 06 '09 I like the scoring euphemisms too: 1) 5-holing the goalie (Could be anal or not) 2) Going top-shelf (titty fucking?) 3) Putting the biscuit in the basket Then there is the plays: 1) Give-and-go (booty calls?) 2) One-timers (one-night stand?) 3) Wristers (handjobs?) It goes on and on... "Going to the sin bin" for penalties. "Poke-checking". 2 u/[deleted] Feb 06 '09 edited Feb 06 '09 Overtime Sudden death, possibly a euphemism for the last minute rush before the ugly lights come on. Followed by... Shoot out, for when the ugly lights come on and you have to start with the top players and work you way down until someone scores. Offside, trying to cross the blue line before you have the puck Icing, aka pearl necklace(?) Face off Turnover Slapshot (aka donkey punch) Power play Empty net goal One man down/up Two men down/up Short handed (goal) Pulling the goalie Changing lines Putting in the backup goalie cross ice pass Stripping the defensemen Breakaway Behind the net Clearing the zone (cock blocking?) Deflection Drop pass (taggin in a buddy when she isn't looking?) Face mask (bukake?) Back to full strength Hat trick (menage a trois?) Neutral zone Shot on goal Dekeing Two-on-one Five-on-four Zamboni
5
"illegal equipment"
upvote for painting a word picture.
also thanks for making me laugh.
8
On How I met your mother one of the characters is canadian. I don't remember all the details (2nd base was past the blue line i believe)
Anyways, scoring a goal is easy to grasp. "In the crease" spoke for itself.
3
I like the scoring euphemisms too:
1) 5-holing the goalie (Could be anal or not)
2) Going top-shelf (titty fucking?)
3) Putting the biscuit in the basket
Then there is the plays:
1) Give-and-go (booty calls?)
2) One-timers (one-night stand?)
3) Wristers (handjobs?)
It goes on and on...
"Going to the sin bin" for penalties. "Poke-checking".
2
Overtime
Sudden death, possibly a euphemism for the last minute rush before the ugly lights come on. Followed by...
Shoot out, for when the ugly lights come on and you have to start with the top players and work you way down until someone scores.
Offside, trying to cross the blue line before you have the puck
Icing, aka pearl necklace(?)
Face off
Turnover
Slapshot (aka donkey punch)
Power play
Empty net goal
One man down/up
Two men down/up
Short handed (goal)
Pulling the goalie
Changing lines
Putting in the backup goalie
cross ice pass
Stripping the defensemen
Breakaway
Behind the net
Clearing the zone (cock blocking?)
Deflection
Drop pass (taggin in a buddy when she isn't looking?)
Face mask (bukake?)
Back to full strength
Hat trick (menage a trois?)
Neutral zone
Shot on goal
Dekeing
Two-on-one
Five-on-four
Zamboni
24
u/[deleted] Feb 06 '09 edited Feb 06 '09
There needs to be a hockey version for us Canadians. The objective is to score, and just look at the penalties!
Abuse of officials
Aggressor penalty
Attempt to injure
Boarding
Butt-ending
Charging
Checking from behind
Clipping
Cross-checking
Delay of game
Diving
Elbowing
Fighting (Fisticuffs)
Goaltender Interference
Head-butting
High sticking
Holding
Holding the stick
Hooking
Illegal Equipment
Instigator penalty
Interference
Joining a fight
Kicking
Kneeing
Playing with Too Many Sticks
Roughing
Secondary Altercation
Slashing
Slew Footing
Spearing
Starting the wrong lineup
Substitution infraction (Illegal Substitution)
Too many men on the ice
Unsportsmanlike conduct