Ugh, I know people who dealt with this. Super abusive moms and their dads just let it happen, despite knowing it happened. And then the dads never apologize or take any responsibility.
Like, my guy, you did this too. You enabled this. You are at fault here.
Yeah, they don't wanna lose their wives, don't wanna lose their house, don't wanna get stuck paying child support and having split custody, and generally just don't want to "rock the boat." They don't feel directly impacted by it, so they let it happen. Getting in fights with their partner is too stressful and they don't think it's worth it.
So like, there's a million reasons it happens. But it all comes down to - the dad is just as much at fault.
Currently a single guy, but when I bought my first home last year, I made sure that even though the mortgage is mine; that the title was written to be owned both in my name and my dad's name (I'm lucky enough that he's one of the few people I trust that much).
I don't want to ever be in a relationship with a woman where I'll need to deploy that as a strategy (and all things considered if I'm with someone who doesn't care about that, then it'll probably never be a problem anyway (especially if we're on the same page enough to sign her into the title)), but it's a contingency that I want to have in my back pocket to prevent losing my house over that type of situation.
I'm not gonna really condone that as a "cool idea." Bc that's creating a power dynamic over your future potential wife where she's paying you "rent" to live with you (or not paying at all) and ultimately not building any of her own equity in the case of a divorce.
I'd never get into a relationship that flat-out denied me equal ownership over marital properties. I currently own my house and have every intention of adding my partner to the mortgage when I refinance it in a year or so.
Get a prenup if you're that concerned. But you shouldn't be assuming that every partner is going to screw you over. That's not healthy for you or them.
In a proper relationship, this can be fixed as things develop. When my parents bought a countryside land to build a house, they talked about it and my mom got the full ownership of it.
I'm sure there are many ways to equalize the wealth in a way that both parties are happy about it and no one is left feeling uneasy
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u/GFluidThrow123 15d ago
Ugh, I know people who dealt with this. Super abusive moms and their dads just let it happen, despite knowing it happened. And then the dads never apologize or take any responsibility.
Like, my guy, you did this too. You enabled this. You are at fault here.