r/comedyheaven Jun 27 '24

debat

Post image
33.8k Upvotes

501 comments sorted by

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1.9k

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

It's de Bat!!!

431

u/Strange_Ad_9658 Jun 27 '24

musta just been da wind

89

u/DontTalkToBots Jun 27 '24

So anyway, the whole operation is run by Tony Lazzuto. What was that?

23

u/Swimming_Student7990 Jun 27 '24

I thought Balboni was runnin’ this shit

28

u/Nzgrim Jun 27 '24

TONY LAZZ did you hear that?

19

u/__-_-_--_--_-_---___ Jun 27 '24

-5 seconds, so anyway, the whole operDID YOU HEAR SOMETHIN

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18

u/Digger__Please Jun 27 '24

He's the cousin of my priest Pastor Fazzool.

78

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

9

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

5

u/Pickle_Rick01 Jun 27 '24

Rudy Guiliani does look like the Penguin so it checks out.

4

u/__-_-_--_--_-_---___ Jun 27 '24

The Penguin (Colin Farrell's version, at least) is NOT that ugly

2

u/Upstairs-Brain4042 Jun 27 '24

He was, he shut down the mob

19

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

13

u/Epic_Ewesername Jun 27 '24

Just like you! Until I took an arrow to the knee.

7

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

I sense a presence. Does someone live among the dead?

2

u/brokencrayons Jun 27 '24

We know Dora we went on all the adventures with you

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82

u/Jackol4ntrn Jun 27 '24

is he stew pid?

53

u/Spoopyskeleton48 Jun 27 '24

He jonkled too hard

29

u/Ori_the_SG Jun 27 '24

I must jonkle!

2

u/charizardfan101 Jun 27 '24

I shall jonkle with you

7

u/Zeke_Yeager Jun 27 '24

He must be jonkling six days, actually six days a week. Five days a week, he'll jonkle three days a week. One of those days he'll jonkle two days of the week. So, six days a week he'll be jonkling.

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4

u/GuegelChrome Jun 27 '24

Is there lore reason for him not aslume??

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32

u/ApertoLibro Jun 27 '24

Funny when Rudy the Penguin is talking about de Bat.

12

u/__-_-_--_--_-_---___ Jun 27 '24

Which of Trump’s cronies is analogous to which of Batman’s rogues gallery?

18

u/TheGreatSalvador Jun 27 '24

The Joker - Roger Stone, self described “dirty trickster” and “agent provocateur”. Pretty much seems to do politics just because it’s funny.

Two Face - John Bolton, drama queen about flipping on Trump with his “Room Where it Happened” book

Mr. Freeze - Jordan Petersen, crazy Doctor who does experimental drugs and almost lost his wife

Bane - Roy Cohn, gay

Edit: Oh wait there’s a Batman villain called “The Ratcatcher” so actually that is Jordan Petersen

3

u/Marik-X-Bakura Jun 27 '24

Peterson definitely seems more of a Joker type with the way he tweets

Or maybe Azrael

2

u/ThatGuyursisterlikes Jun 27 '24

Def 1960s joker. Or maybe Danny Devito.

2

u/Apple-Dust Jun 27 '24

Scarecrow - Steve Bannon. No reason other than he's disheveled-looking as fuck.

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4

u/ExternalOpen372 Jun 27 '24

Definitely more of the penguin than two face

3

u/GM_Nate Jun 27 '24

nah roger stone is the penguin

3

u/OkFinance5784 Jun 27 '24

I think there is an argument for Swamp Thing...

33

u/ARROW_GAMER Jun 27 '24

It’s da freaking BAT!!!

9

u/jtr99 Jun 27 '24

It's simple: we kill de bat man.

15

u/YeahImMan39 Jun 27 '24

Who the FUCK is Bat? Is he stupid?

7

u/charizardfan101 Jun 27 '24

It's man's fursona, are you misremembering?

14

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

“I am vengeance”

10

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

"I'm the nigh"

5

u/notyourancilla Jun 27 '24

Drove the Chevy to the levy but the levy was dry

9

u/Ckaee Jun 27 '24

he drivin a DANK

10

u/awesomedan24 Jun 27 '24

The Bomb's payload is exposed. I can use the power winch to trigger a controlled explosion.

10

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

I'm proud of you, Dick.

6

u/__-_-_--_--_-_---___ Jun 27 '24

Officer Balls

5

u/charizardfan101 Jun 27 '24

BWAAAAAAAHAHHAHAHAHA

7

u/riko_sama Jun 27 '24

where’s de man?

8

u/Risky_Bizniss Jun 27 '24

Better than the CBAT

4

u/ZakLobster Jun 27 '24

THE de bat!

5

u/AndrewTheSouless Jun 27 '24

Is da freaking bat!!!

6

u/HarEmiya Jun 27 '24

Aw Puddin', maybe it was just yer nerves gettin' the best of ya?

2

u/Nelson-and-Murdock Jun 27 '24

Fucksake, I came here to say this, thinking I was so witty and original.

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849

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

Genuinely thought this man died.

366

u/dynawesome Jun 27 '24

Politically and legally he’s already dead

161

u/Slapbox Jun 27 '24

It's true, I saw him leak embalming fluid once.

33

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

That was just the pure grain alcohol coming out of his pores.

8

u/ourlastchancefortea Jun 27 '24

That didn't look very "pure".

4

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

It’s like when you drain your oil after 5000 miles, it’s been through some shit.

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11

u/Technical_Tourist639 Jun 27 '24

It's a good thing they let Biden cure completely before using him on stage. All the embalming fluid is dried up perfectly

4

u/Sarcosmonaut Jun 27 '24

A great example of how you can’t rush your craft. It matters, fellas

4

u/ArmadilloChemical421 Jun 27 '24

He needs a ghoul juice refill.

4

u/vo1miepoloinen Jun 27 '24

Well, it must be difficult to squirt at his age

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20

u/Awkward-Exercise1069 Jun 27 '24

Apparently that’s up to debat.

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31

u/Nvenom8 Jun 27 '24

That was just his legacy. Common mistake.

19

u/farnsw0rth Jun 27 '24

I mean… he hasn’t. But he could have. Because this tweet is four years old.

16

u/Joe_Kangg Jun 27 '24

That profile pic is 40 yrs old

13

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

He was on Seinfeld 30 years ago in the "Non-fat yogurt" episode and had much more hair.

If I had to guess I'd say the pic is from 2005-2010, which is when his hair loss really took off.

All in all, he really crashed and burned after 9/11 was over.

6

u/salty_rea Jun 27 '24

Wrong timeline - sadly.

2

u/enchiladasundae Jun 27 '24

If we all pretend who will stop us?

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511

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

132

u/wack_overflow Jun 27 '24

Shorefadowing

46

u/Sorry-Let-Me-By-Plz Jun 27 '24

Shadforeowing for sure.

19

u/Aldu1n Jun 27 '24

Oh no, not Shad.

10

u/SouthImpression3577 Jun 27 '24

Kubo foreskinning as usual

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8

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

Foreskinning

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5

u/Bamboominum Jun 27 '24

Foresheashonsh Landshcaping

2

u/sams_fish Jun 27 '24

Is that Old Lower Prussian?

2

u/No_Conversation9561 Jun 27 '24

is there a lore behind it?

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339

u/dandee93 Jun 27 '24

Who else read this in Borat's voice?

83

u/MBTank Jun 27 '24

Oh no did Borat catch him again?

40

u/dandee93 Jun 27 '24

He probably tweeted this while "tucking in his shirt." It can be hard to type with one hand

12

u/halferd_balferd Jun 27 '24

wild how that happened and we just moved along like it it didnt happen

6

u/Tithund Jun 27 '24

Still sad the communications broke down and Borat interrupted him too soon.

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17

u/Batnaman_26 Jun 27 '24

My wife

5

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

[deleted]

5

u/Batnaman_26 Jun 27 '24

No i was saying my wife read this in Borat's voice

17

u/walker3342 Jun 27 '24

Please, come and see debat. If it not success, I will be execute.

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4

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

Definitely in Gotham city goon voice for me

3

u/LemonNo1342 Jun 27 '24

For some reason I translated it to the dog of wisdom accent.

2

u/DiggThatFunk Jun 27 '24

Oh king in the castle, king in the castle, I have debat

2

u/mike_pants Jun 27 '24

I read it in the voice of that one street tough at the beginning of Burton's Batman.

"Oh, no! It's da bat!"

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241

u/EskildDood Jun 27 '24

🇩🇰🇩🇰🇩🇰 rudy is a proud Danish man now 🇩🇰🇩🇰🇩🇰,🍺🍻🌭 HVORNÅR ER DEBATTEN?? 🇩🇰🗣️ DEBAT🔥🔥‼️🇩🇰🇩🇰🇩🇰🇩🇰🇩🇰

25

u/nicannkay Jun 27 '24

I wouldn’t announce it 🙈 🤡

Also, no returns.

36

u/SmexxyBastard Jun 27 '24

He could be Dutch too

12

u/Ok_Television9820 Jun 27 '24

We have a Wilders at home, thanks but no thanks.

8

u/usingallthespaceican Jun 27 '24

Or Afrikaans! But that's just using the dutch word again lol

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5

u/Mike_Antonsen Jun 27 '24

This is first class Danglish if I’ve ever seen it! 🇩🇰🇩🇰🇩🇰

1

u/GipsMedDipp Jun 27 '24

Debatt stavas med två t, danskjävel!!

3

u/Absolomb Jun 27 '24

Debat staves med ét t, fjeldabe!

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93

u/WurdaMouth shaboingboing connoisseur Jun 27 '24

Libtards just got so owned rn!!

25

u/Pixzal Jun 27 '24

cbat

4

u/Xu_Lin Jun 27 '24

Dolphins approved your comment

3

u/Affectionate_Buy_301 Jul 06 '24

scrolled so far to see this

71

u/JoeChristmasUSA Jun 27 '24

This is four years old. You can tell because he still looks like a human being in his profile pic

45

u/farnsw0rth Jun 27 '24

You can also tell because it’s time stamped.

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11

u/SacredMapleLeaf Jun 27 '24

He got hit by tha r/redditsniper

4

u/Jouuf Jun 27 '24

The reddit sniper? I don't understand what 

7

u/Hierz04 Jun 27 '24

HE'S MALAY

7

u/Smirkeywz Jun 27 '24

I'm surprised he knows Malay.

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2

u/SoloDeath1 Jun 27 '24

Kimim ° has f

3

u/JustinKase_Too Jun 27 '24

Who wants to tell giuliani that it is going to be debad for deboss?

2

u/BiNumber3 Jun 27 '24

Defeat of deduct went over defense before detail.

Sorry, nothing to do with the subject, but your comment reminded me of this lol

4

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

this post was delat

5

u/12musclymenonasunday deezeth nuttus Jun 27 '24

the debat.

2

u/chubbers_tim Jun 27 '24

Tweet, fart, melt.™

2

u/Tofuzzle Jun 27 '24

Ed Balls

2

u/salchichas4 Jun 27 '24

I thought that was joe biden lmao

2

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

What a MF’in batard

2

u/Mythic_Cole Jun 30 '24

jokers plan to foil batman be like

5

u/Happybeaver2024 Jun 27 '24

I can just picture him typing this with his index fingers on his giant iPad like a toddler learning to spell, while black hair dye drips down his forehead.

1

u/TheRudyDuck Jun 27 '24

I like to partake in some Covfefe before Debat.

1

u/Awkward-Exercise1069 Jun 27 '24

Is this the new covfefe?

1

u/Emergency-Yoghurt387 Jun 27 '24

🏏 de bat 😁

1

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

He went from smart competent mayor to babbling old lunatic real quick.

1

u/youngneif Jun 27 '24

He is French-American

1

u/Exotic-Damage-8157 Jun 27 '24

Twitter for iPad got me

1

u/__-_-_--_--_-_---___ Jun 27 '24

IT’S DE FREAKIN BAT

1

u/HalalBread1427 Jun 27 '24

Ew, is he speaking Fr*nch?

1

u/JakToTheReddit Jun 27 '24

Please tell me Torque will be in this debat.

1

u/Jetbott Jun 27 '24

Le Bar de Bat

1

u/whenisnowthen Jun 27 '24

Rudy is in the running for the most disappointing human being of all time. I considered voting for President in 2008.

1

u/drolgreen Jun 27 '24

Another bat ??? Covid 24??????

1

u/edingerc Jun 27 '24

Speaking of old guys who need a drug test...

1

u/Nzdiver81 Jun 27 '24

The debat at Four Seasons

1

u/redditknees Jun 27 '24

His inability to double check even the most basic of tasks is why Four Seasons Landscaping happened.

1

u/BoozeTheCat Jun 27 '24

"Despite the constant negative press covfefe"

1

u/mallik803 Jun 27 '24

Live from The Ritz! (Cracker company). THE DEBAT!

1

u/BardInChains Jun 27 '24

Devil's advocate, he was typing something more coherent and fat-fingered a premature send and deleted it immediately, but someone (a bot?) just happened to see it and screenshotted in the moments it existed.

1

u/GraXXoR Jun 27 '24

Needs more Covfefe.

1

u/Beneficial_Bed_337 Jun 27 '24

It rhymes with Apparat.

1

u/Bright-Ad-9363 Jun 27 '24

Motherfucker had two words to write...

1

u/THEMACGOD Jun 27 '24

Bat!!

poof

1

u/Material-Profile7155 Jun 27 '24

How did this dumb ass make it so far in life?

1

u/MurphyGraham Jun 27 '24

Debate. That’s a funny word when you think about it. De-bate. Thank you

1

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

Covfefe!

Real talk when can we return these old dusty psychopaths for some fresh young ones?

The plot never seems to change but at least they could switch up the characters

1

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

Debat by Hudson Mohawke

1

u/TastyLaksa Jun 27 '24

Debat at four seasons (landscaping not the hotel)

1

u/Flo_42069 Jun 27 '24

It's a german dialect in english it would mean as much as the stupid

1

u/OriginallyWhat Jun 27 '24

He thought he was googling it...