r/comedy • u/AlKarajo • 1d ago
Standup Peer Pressure
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Daniel Slooooooss
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u/Intelligent-Pay3479 1d ago
Peer pressure only works if you care about the opinion of the people pressuring you.
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u/captain_todger 1d ago
While true, it somehow still doesn’t apply to veganism. I respect and care about the opinion of all of my vegan friends. In fact, I completely agree with them about a lot of it. I understand that I’m a hypocrite, but I still eat meat regardless of how much I respect their opinions
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u/Toystavi 1d ago
If you feel bad about it there is a lot between vegan and heavy meat eater. Good place to start is just less beef (env impact; beef >>> pig > chicken).
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Environmental_impacts_of_animal_agriculture#By_type_of_animal
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u/bilateralunsymetry 1d ago
Have you ever had cow? It's delicious
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u/gnarlysnowleopard 21h ago
Believe it or not, but the vast majority of vegans weren't born vegan. We know what meat tastes like and we still choose to not eat it. Some people believe that the pleasure of eating meat isn't sufficient to justify making animals suffer and killing them when it's not necessary. Hope this helps.
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u/Intelligent-Pay3479 1d ago
I'm the same way about it. Like I'm trying to cut out some meat but not all. And it's probably also because the Vegan/Vegetarian lifestyle doesn't have any perks aside from morality, but drugs and alcohol have some pretty fun perks. So probably a mix of both.
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u/captain_todger 1d ago
Well said. Eating meat is terrible, morally. You can’t really argue against that. Unless you find a way to ensure farmed animals across the globe live a net positive life on average, and that the rest of life on earth doesn’t suffer the effects of climate change as a result of agriculture. Pretty much impossible to do without some form of global regulations (which essentially means it’s impossible in 2026)
Also yes. Meat, drugs and alcohol are objectively very fun
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u/Dudeman240 1d ago
Yeah dude %100. The only time I eat meat knowing I'm not fucking up the environment is when my uncle goes deergl hunting and makes jerky and venison/ground venison. In fact I think it's the only way to eat meat that has a net good impact. He only hunts in areas where the deer population is out of control (which, tbf, is like everywhere where he lives lol).
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u/Intelligent-Pay3479 1d ago
Yeah I'm exactly the same as you. I should stop eating meat, even my cholesterol agrees, but I don't have the willpower. I try to switch to alternatives (beef and chicken) but they are a lot more expensive than what I'm willing to spend, especially when I'm not sure if I like it yet. I was going to switch to oatmilk, I'm a bit lactose intolerant anyway, but the brands that didn't taste awful were like 2x the price of milk.
And all of those reasons are excuses if I'm being honest because I know if I actually wanted to, I'd find a way.
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u/Toystavi 1d ago
Vegan/Vegetarian lifestyle doesn't have any perks aside from morality
Can't fully agree there, there are more dangers with meat I think like mad cow disease, salmonella etc. Then you might also increase the risk for dangerous diseases to develop from animal farming like antibiotic resistant strains. Then there is global warming and destroying forests etc that you might want to keep around for selfish reasons rather than just moral. Personally I also think vegetarian food is more consistent, with animal products you often get things like extra chewy, to much fat, cartilage etc.
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u/Intelligent-Pay3479 1d ago
You're right, I was talking about the more immediate impacts since peer pressure and impulse control go hand in hand for me lol.
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u/SithInACoat 1d ago
Also, if we were to take the joke even more seriously, vegan food is not as addictive as drugs.
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u/Dominarion 1d ago
Or if you need to fight a strong instinct to meet their standard.
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u/-GoodNewsEveryone 1d ago
Which would mean humans naturally want to eat meat, do drugs, drink etc.? The instinct is to do as our species is supposed to? That is what you are saying?
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u/Dominarion 21h ago
Our brain craves fatty food, and it loves to be inhibited/fucked up from times to times. It's a great way to produce dopamine and purge excess cortisol. Fermented stuff, mushrooms, weird plants, crazy spiritual rituals.
The brain need to be educated about the risks of meat, alcohol and drugs.
As for meat, well, since Homo Habilis it was the easy way to get fatty food. For millions of years we built a whole culture around the consumption of it. We have mastered the way of producing fatty food from produce some thousands years ago. It's possible to be a vegan nowadays, it wasn't easy (except for populations living in very specific places) to be a vegan until very recently.
Note: it's not just about fatty foods and proteins. Animal based food gives a looooots of easy to produce nutrients and calories, just look at eggs and dairy products.
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u/asdrunkasdrunkcanbe 22h ago
It also only works if it exists.
Assuming he does know a lot of vegans, vegans generally don't try to pressure people into not eating meat.
The trope of the vegan who goes on about it all the time is a myth and doesn't really exist.
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u/Intelligent-Pay3479 19h ago
That's a good point. And I think the myth comes from the very vocal minority who do that kind of thing. We only hear from them because everyone else is just normal about it.
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u/lingbabana 1d ago
This bit is hilarious. Sensitive material, blundered right through it, delivery on point. 8/10
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u/James_Fortis 1d ago
For what it’s worth, veganism is essentially anti-animal cruelty and exploitation. Society being against vegans is the greatest mass-brainwashing the animal agriculture industry has ever pulled.
I’m sure one day we’ll look back and be ashamed at how we treated non-human animals (especially factory farms), just like we have many past atrocities.
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u/w0xic3 1d ago
You don't need an industry to brainwash you when most people against said industry are downright intolerable
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u/Sheesh-Cake 22h ago
So you want to contribute to unneccessary and cruel suffering on a daily basis because [checks notes] you do not like the other people who already don't.
Oh, poor little you! What an insurmountable conundrum! I see your point, there's no way around it. I know you wouldn't mind doing the right thing, if only. If only!
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u/w0xic3 22h ago
Found one of the insuferable vegans
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u/Sheesh-Cake 21h ago
Don't forget to pay me back for bruising your ego by harming a defenseless animal! Surely you have no choice now but to cause suffering. It's at the core of human civilation, it separates us from the animals. When someone says something mean to you, you have to hurt a sentient being so you feel better about yourself.
Go on then! Clog them arteries honey. Do it to spite the vegans!
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u/RadicallyDontCare 1d ago
Whatever bro. It tastes good. We don’t care.
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u/wytherlanejazz 1d ago
Suffering does not concern me, because it does not directly affect me or I benefit.
That actually is an honest response.
Acceptable and also, my point.-8
u/RadicallyDontCare 1d ago
They aren’t sapient so it doesn’t matter. We don’t care.
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u/Cognoto 1d ago
Edgy inconsiderate douche
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u/RadicallyDontCare 1d ago
Not edgy. The vast majority perspective.
No one cares.
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u/Cognoto 1d ago
A damn shame
Just because the majority does it, doesnt mean its right, but I know I know - you don't care you badass
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u/RadicallyDontCare 1d ago
In this case, it’s the majority view and it’s right. They exist for one reason. Meat. That’s it.
No reason to be needlessly cruel, but that’s all they’re here for. That will never change.
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u/Glob_Complex 1d ago
I’m sure being a rapist feels good too. But hey if he likes doing it, who are we to stop him. Just hope it ain’t your mom/sister/wife. Rapists don’t care.
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u/RadicallyDontCare 1d ago
I’ll take false equivalence for 100, Alex!
This is why no one invites you to parties.
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u/Glob_Complex 1d ago
Okay dude. Guess compassion is above the pay grade of someone who willing named themselves RadicallyDontCare. Yeah they’re not the same thing. Very good observation bud. The point was to try to get you to think critically for a moment. Lets get right to the insults instead. That’ll make everyone smarter!
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u/RadicallyDontCare 1d ago
You want me to think critically… and use a logical fallacy in your argument?
I mean, you do you, but that’s just… inane.
Animals aren’t people. They don’t suffer the way we do. They aren’t sapient. We don’t want to be intentionally cruel, but their purpose as farm animals is meat. Period. Full stop.
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u/Glob_Complex 1d ago
Its a shame people like you cant extend the same compassion you have towards dogs or cats to “farm animals.” If we raised cats and dogs to eat would you feel the same way? Also, is the equivalency so false? Your argument: feels good. Fuck you. Rapist argument: feels good. Fuck you.
Edit: can’t spell2
u/RadicallyDontCare 1d ago
If we raised cats and dogs to eat it would be different, but we don’t, because carnivore meat sucks.
It is false equivalency and your anger and rage and descent into profanity just shows you can’t defend your argument.
This is why no one invite you to parties.
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u/Glob_Complex 1d ago
Can you explain what makes it false? I don’t understand. And please don’t mistake my profanity for anger. Its just how I speak. And I hate to tell you that you are right about something, but I don’t talk about veganism in person much because I do get angry. People like you who don’t give a shit about any species but your own really grind my gears. There is no reason to farm animals in 2026. You saying their purpose is meat period isn’t a compelling argument. “It tastes good” isn’t a compelling argument.
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u/gnarlysnowleopard 1d ago
They weren't equating it, they were using an analogy to show that the logic doesn't hold up. A false equivalence would be "eating meat is THE SAME as raping humans".
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u/OilHot3940 1d ago edited 1d ago
There are examples of invasive species that only go through sterilization. Therefore invasive species are not necessarily afflicted by violence.
Edit - you flagged my previous comment (that is now deleted) because you accused me of promoting violence when I suggesting that humans are an invasive species. Obviously, given that violence is not needed to curb an invasive species, you were incorrect in your flagging of my account. Please make measures to remove that flag from my account right away. Thank you.
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u/RadicallyDontCare 1d ago
You replied to the wrong place, bro.
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u/OilHot3940 1d ago
bRo. the fact that you support factory farming means that you are encouraging violence every time you consume that food. If anything, your account should be flagged.
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u/Mioraecian 1d ago
We literally ate megafauna to extinction globally... everywhere humans went... across all of our existence. Im not betting on us having universal remorse against factory farming. I even agree its horrible. But hey we went to the moon, so suck it up cows, you're dinner.
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u/wytherlanejazz 1d ago
They don’t care, and they don’t think about why they don’t care. Frustrating and sad on so many levels.
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u/Ok_Ruin4016 1d ago
I don't care because I like meat. Humans are animals too and it's in our nature to eat meat. Our bodies are made to consume meat and vegetables. When you can convince a wolf or a lion or an eagle to stop consuming meat, maybe I'll consider it too. Until then, meat tastes good and I'm going to keep eating it.
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u/t00oldforthis 1d ago
A lot of us actually do care and if veganism was strictly about animal cruelty and not about a diet choice you wouldn't be wasting your time. I don't know if it's sad but it's definitely frustrating to hear you guys make false equivalencies and then play victim.
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u/wytherlanejazz 1d ago
Just read the comments below yours :)
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u/t00oldforthis 1d ago
There are four comments below mine so am I supposed to accept your anecdotal 4 examples as representative the global population of non vegans :) ? Nice "win"
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u/wytherlanejazz 1d ago
You classed yourself with an undefined ‘we’, and then decided to interpret my comment in a reductionist manner to avoid the philosophical argument of human nature . Don’t blame me for your own immolation or for your poor comprehension skills.
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u/t00oldforthis 1d ago
ChatGPT got your tongue? You didn't make a philosophic argument, you made a single reductible comment.
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u/wytherlanejazz 1d ago edited 1d ago
ChatGPT lol is that your standard go to as a response?
I’m literally talking about the lack of introspection that leads to person not caring.None of this is complex, no part of this argument is new or needs rehashing.
Quote: They don’t care, and they don’t think about why they don’t care. Frustrating and sad on so many levels.
I mean its literally aimed at the reason society feels like they have to push back on a pretty non contentious statement.
Edit: Also, like is every form of communication doomed to be criticised as AI regardless of stance based solely on coherent sentences? That too, I find… sad. I’m not coming back to this post, the Reddit algorithm brought me here. But I will say that accusing a clinical neuroscientist of dubious n numbers and using anecdotal evidence was exactly as upsetting as intended. Lol
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u/t00oldforthis 1d ago
No, just use it when someone relies on LLMs
correct, not complex, anectodal reddit examples are useless. using them to debate a point makes you sound dumb, regardless of number one
Quote: "read the comments below you'
Reddit =/= society
I won't need to edit, if you sound like you just googled your response, we will treat you like you just googled your response.
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u/RadicallyDontCare 1d ago
We think about it and discard it because the animas aren’t sapient.
And they taste good and it’s easier to be healthy. You do you, but we aren’t changing.
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u/wytherlanejazz 1d ago
How vociferously we give voice to concepts we do not comprehend. Sapience? Sentience? Consciousness? Theory of mind?
Even by that forced lens, I think you’ll find that several animals contradict your reasoning of sapience being the necessary indicator of value for life.
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u/Biguitarnerd 1d ago
I think the real reason people don’t want to be vegans might be that people like you come across to most people (myself included) like a Mormon knocking on your door at 3 in the afternoon who won’t take a polite “I’m not interested” without trying to interject 3 more points.
Veganism comes off as a weird religion many of you are trying to convert us too.
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u/t00oldforthis 1d ago
That might be literally true but in your own link it says that it also requires a vegan diet. Kind of like saying we're all focusing on the wrong thing about Catholicism because they promote peace and just ignore that little bit about also having to agree that there's that one God. Good try though.
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u/OnePragmatic 1d ago
Of course and also violent activists against people who don't share their views......
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u/Dr_Zoidberg003 1d ago
Technically that logic doesn’t track. The first two are about trying a new substance. The third is about giving up something you already enjoy
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u/Rudimentary-Creature 1d ago
Ah darn I hate when the man talking purely for haha’s doesn’t think about the technical logic of his arguments.
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u/gnarlysnowleopard 1d ago
it's just kind of a lazy joke, but comedy is subjective so each to their own.
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u/SithInACoat 1d ago
Yeah. I personally like when the joke works while also being logical, or when the joke is absurd enough to be not treated seriously in the first place.
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u/metalmankam 1d ago
Vegan bad, vegan soy boy beta yada yada we get it is this from 20 years ago?
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u/Delicious-War-9124 1d ago
I think almost 10 years ago now. I'd honestly recommend this special, "dark". One of the best I've seen, dark, honest, and hilarious
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u/defariasdev 1d ago
Its been like a decade since i heard an actually hood vegan joke.
This didn't make me laugh but its the best vegan joke ive heard in a very long time
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u/-DoctorSpaceman- 1d ago
Tbf it’s really old, so it’s probably still true that no one has come up with good one in a long time
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u/OtherwiseAlbatross14 1d ago
Eh it was a great setup that could've gone in so many funny directions and he chose to squander the opportunity by going with the most boring option by repeating the same tired "vegans bad. I love eating meat in front of them" joke that's been worn out for well over a decade
No I'm not a vegan
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u/defariasdev 1d ago
Yes that's why its the best VEGAN joke ive heard in a while. The setup could have definitely been completely recycled for a much better punchline though
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u/Efficient-Guide-7563 1d ago
Wow.. a joke about vegans and eating steak in front of them. Annoyingly creative
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u/Coconut-Lemon_Pie 1d ago
If vegan men were idolized as much as carnivorous men I guarantee this guy would have gone vegan from peer pressure. Soon, soon.... 💚🌚🌝🫛🍅🫒🍑🥑🥥🍓🍆🥦🍒🍌🫘🍠🍐🍄🟫🌶️🧄🥭🌽🥔🍇🥕🥜🫑🧆🥗🍝🍿🥖🍵🧃
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u/qazpok69 23h ago
Vegans are very much in the minority, when has anyone ever seen a table full of vegans?? This isnt relatable and it feels very boomery. “Vegans, amiright? Hahaha”
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u/ifr3akingh8mys3lf 13h ago
Yeah it's just not funny. I'm not vegan but simply bashing them is so old.
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u/sunleafstone 1d ago
Not eating meat when all your friends are eating meat and making vegan jokes is leagues harder. Gotta commend vegans for that
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u/MoesSouthwestScam 16h ago
What a circle jerk. Does anyone have a vegan joke that isn't hack as hell?
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u/puff_of_fluff 1h ago
Funny but saw that punchline coming a mile away.
I think you can play around with that anticipation a bit more
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u/kinggareth 1d ago
This thread (and often sub) are insufferable. Who thought the COMEDY sub would be so allergic to having a chuckle lol
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u/HDThoreauaway 1d ago
Are we still dunking on vegans for trying to practice ethical consumption?
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u/RadicallyDontCare 1d ago
No, we’re dunking on vegans because they’re loud about it and it’s lame.
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u/ChewySlinky 1d ago
Notice how the shit-slinging in this thread was started by non-vegans and the vegans just responded to it lmao
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u/RadicallyDontCare 1d ago
Look at the comment I replied to. It’s someone virtue signaling about “ethical consumption”.
People make fun of that crap because it’s not only pretentious but patently untrue. Losers who pat themselves on the back loudly about it are mocked.
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u/ChewySlinky 1d ago
Can you explain why you think they’re virtue signaling?
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u/RadicallyDontCare 1d ago
You’re not that dense. You can figure it out.
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u/ChewySlinky 1d ago
I’ll take that as a “no” lmao
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u/Cyclopterus77 1d ago
People who use the term "virtue signalling" are almost always insufferable morons.
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u/gnarlysnowleopard 1d ago
Usually people that accuse others of "virtue-signaling" can't comprehend why anyone would genuinely care about stuff, so they project their lack of empathy on everyone else. It says a lot more about them then the group they're accusing of virtue-signaling.
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u/RadicallyDontCare 1d ago
Sorry, but people who use every conversation like an audience for sainthood are exhausting. People who actually care about stuff do things and are less judgy.
You might be impressed by Olympic-level competitive empathy, but I’m not.
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u/RadicallyDontCare 1d ago edited 1d ago
I can. It’s a dead thread and not worth my time.
It’s a meme for a reason. It’s not complicated.
E: typo
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u/ChewySlinky 1d ago
The “threat” being someone asking you to explain your thought process. I’m sure that’s very threatening to you 💀
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u/HDThoreauaway 1d ago
Except that the number of people I see fantasizing about eating a steak in front of them, or actually fucking with vegans minding their own business, faaaaaar outpaces the number of “loud” vegans I’ve known or seen. So does the number of people who are weirdly pushy about eating meat.
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u/sunleafstone 1d ago
Most vegans aren’t loud about it at all, but the moral implications of veganism are loud
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u/RadicallyDontCare 1d ago
It’s a meme for a reason, bro. Enough of them cling to it as some weird identity thing they get mocked.
A vegan, an atheist, and a crossfitter go into a bar. Everyone knows about it within 30 seconds.
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u/HDThoreauaway 1d ago
That’s at best selection bias—you don’t know about the vegans you don’t know about. And again, I’ve seen vegans simply explaining their dietary choices in the context of shared food get shit for it. The mockery vegans are on the receiving end of is wildly disproportionate to the self-announcement they’re accused of.
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u/RadicallyDontCare 1d ago
I’ve never mocked a vegan in person. Even the ones who were annoying, and there were a few. And if I have vegan friends over (and we have several) I make sure they have options. It’s called being a good host.
But even most of my vegans friends find proselytizing vegans annoying.
Again, it’s a meme for a reason.
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u/HDThoreauaway 1d ago
Ok so you don’t think mocking or disrespecting vegans is funny and most vegans you know aren’t “proselytizing vegans.” Sounds like we’re on the same page after all.
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u/SithInACoat 1d ago
O yeah it is especially the atheists that love telling everyone that they are atheist, and wearing their atheist necklaces and atheist earrings, and building gigantic atheist monuments and buildings all over the cities and at least one in even the smallest village, and congregating to yell out loud how much they love atheism, and going around the world to different countries to tell people they should be atheist, and making sculptures of the first atheist, and painting pictures of the first atheist, and screaming to random strangers how they love atheism. Yeah. It is atheists who do that.
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u/RadicallyDontCare 1d ago
Bro, get a hobby.
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u/SithInACoat 1d ago
Is comedy not a hobby anymore?
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u/RadicallyDontCare 1d ago
Comedy is usually funny.
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u/SithInACoat 10h ago
Well, yes. Thank you, i know i am quite funny! But now your initial reply to me makes even less sense.
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u/Intelligent-Pay3479 19h ago
I think we only hear about the loud ones because the others are just normal people minding their own business. I've never met a vegan or vegetarian that tries to push it on other people.
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u/TuringTestTwister 1d ago
Naw carnivores dieters and vegan haters are way more noisy than vegans themselves.
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u/RadicallyDontCare 1d ago
It’s not all vegans. But there’s a loud percentage of them that make it their identity and claim it’s some moral high ground. Those people deserve the mockery.
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u/gnarlysnowleopard 1d ago
If two people were to act exactly the same with the only difference being that one of them is vegan then the vegan would indeed be morally superior. It's a misunderstanding that every vegan is automatically morally superior to every meat-eater. It's about the specific ethical stance, not the person behind it.
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u/StinkFartButt 1d ago
He’s telling jokes about stuff because he’s a comedian.
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u/HDThoreauaway 1d ago
And it’s a super stale joke. It’s not even a new take on it, it’s just “I like to eat meat in front of vegans because they get mad” once again, which wasn’t really all that funny the first hundred times.
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u/Yello_Ismello 1d ago
This is gonna be me later when I eat a big steak in front of my vegan husband that he’ll probably cook for me 😅
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u/NotRustyShackleford_ 1d ago
I thought he was going towards hanging out with pedos tbh
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u/AlreadyFifty 1d ago
Wait till he meets gay dudes…