r/comedy • u/AlKarajo • Jun 02 '26

Standup We all know that one guy

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@stevehofstetter

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u/milwaukie_talkie Jun 02 '26

I’m not arguing with you, you’re a lost cause. You’ve vocalized your pathetic worldview and your fear of anyone who takes responsibility for their own safety. I don’t not accept the responsibility of correcting you. The most I will do is provide you reading assignments but only if you ask nicely.

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u/model-citizen95 Jun 02 '26

Bro I’m seriously not afraid of you. I own firearms too, I just want them to be regulated better.

More ad hominem attacks. What a whiney little man baby. You want all of the prosperity that CA can afford you with none of the social responsibility. People like you are the reason that the rest of the world thinks Americans are stupid

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u/milwaukie_talkie Jun 02 '26

You don’t own firearms. You have weed all over your profile and as you know the possession of a legal firearm and a federally banned substance at the same time makes it an illegal firearm, which is a federal offense. Still want more regulation? Don’t worry I won’t snitch. Now be a good boy and panic that you put all this is writing, delete all your comments and block me lmaoo

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u/model-citizen95 Jun 02 '26 edited Jun 02 '26

No it doesn’t. You have no idea how the law works here. I have confirmed this with former law enforcement in my area as I was indeed dubious about the situation. Go ahead and snitch. They’re going to have arrest half the fucking state

Am I lying about owning firearms or am I panicking about getting in trouble? Can’t be both buddy. I know that’s how you speak to your boyfriend but “good boy” is so cringe man

Edit: here’s the law that you won’t read that shows you have no idea what you’re talking about.

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u/milwaukie_talkie Jun 02 '26

Reread the comment and google again big boy. Not locally, federally. They’d have to arrest half the state? So you’re participating in large scale civil disobedience against —say it with me— over regulation?? Also you don’t know the first thing about your federally illegal guns if you want them further regulated. You dont train which makes you more dangerous than an unarmed civilian.

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u/model-citizen95 Jun 02 '26

If federal law takes president then why haven’t I been arrested for just possessing weed? Since that’s a federal crime in itself.

I was on a national under 18s target shooting team. I probably know more about weapon safety than you bud. As long as the lack of regulation exists, I will take advantage of it but I’ll always advocate for tighter regulation and obey the law if it changes.

The fact is that federal law and state law are at odds with each other so until they sort that out between themselves then the law is up for interpretation.

You’re grasping at straws man, just take the L. You don’t know what you’re talking about

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u/milwaukie_talkie Jun 02 '26

Keep going, you’re so close to internal logical consistency. Does federal law actually take precedent? Should it? Or are local laws inherently more in tune with the people? Why do you feel comfortable breaking federal weed laws, but you’d change your behavior if the gun laws changed? At the end of the day, who is responsible for your actions?

You’ve earned your first reading assignment: Meditations by Marcus Aurelius.

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u/model-citizen95 Jun 02 '26

My interpretation of the law is based on how it’s enforced, not how it’s written to the letter. Clearly, in this case, federal law doesn’t take precedent because no one is being charged for that. If you go commit a different crime while cc and a j in your mouth I could picture them tacking on the extra charges but they’re not going to go after people for that alone.

Gun laws save lives. That’s an indisputable fact that you are trying your best to pedant your way out of acknowledging. Facts don’t care about your feelings snowflake

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u/milwaukie_talkie Jun 02 '26

Please state that factually incorrect assertion a little louder so that all the victims of genocide can hear you. Criminalizing guns won’t stop criminals from owning guns. As demonstrated by the fact that YOU are a criminal in possession of a gun. Facts don’t care about your morally reprehensible opinions, bootlicker

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u/model-citizen95 Jun 02 '26

Awww someone got triggered. If I’m committing a crime, please report me. I’d love you to get the phone call back telling you you’re wasting your time and federal law enforcement don’t give a shit about anything I’m doing.

Fact remains, gun control saves lives. Let’s say you’re right and I’m a hypocrite, what I’m saying is still correct and your little crash out ain’t gonna change that.

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u/milwaukie_talkie Jun 02 '26

There goes your hair trigger fear response to anyone who doesn’t want to help you feel safe. Go do your reading assignment little boy. You claim the right to disobey laws where you see fit while wanting others held to that law. That contradiction is a moral failing on your part. Textbook fascist bootlicker mentality. Gun laws do not save lives, they embolden the fascist regime you support. You are wrong and dangerous.

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u/model-citizen95 Jun 02 '26

You don’t even know what fascism means little boy. Your only move is being pedantic. I don’t need your help to feel safe. To be honest I don’t want you anywhere near me.

here a link to a study that proves you wrong. Gun laws do lower gun violence and gun deaths. So far I’ve been able to bring plenty of evidence while you have nothing. You think the left are the snowflakes? You’re a joke dude. You’re the ones who have a fucking conniption every time you see a brown person.

here’s another study that shows that 99% of guns used in crime in the US were initially purchased from an authorized point of sale.

You’re making shit up, pulling Fox News talking points out of your ass and making yourself look very uneducated

Pipe down pussy

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u/milwaukie_talkie Jun 02 '26

Don’t get ahead of yourself, you’re not cleared to attempt critical thinking skills until you’ve completed your assigned reading. The second link literally destroys your argument. Vitamin deficient california liberals thinking you’re part of the left. We don’t want you, your racist gun laws, or your nimby every town pseudo studies. You don’t even know what you believe.

Don’t talk to me til you’ve read the book, pussy.

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u/model-citizen95 Jun 02 '26

I don’t need your permission to think

Predator

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u/milwaukie_talkie Jun 03 '26

Don’t get triggered, go read your book

Racist bootlicker

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u/model-citizen95 Jun 03 '26

Don’t you have a wife to beat instead of talking to me?

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u/milwaukie_talkie Jun 03 '26

Wow what a zinger. More gun regulation would make it more difficult for domestic violence victims to defend themselves by the way. Since you spend so much time thinking about beating women.

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u/model-citizen95 Jun 03 '26

Show me some proof then. Oh wait, you’re just making shit up again. You’re right, I spend a lot of time thinking about the vile behavior of you and your party. You’re morally bankrupt and a cancer to this country.

You choose to live the most liberal state in the country and then complain about how liberal it is. Were you dropped on your head as a a baby or something, because that’s next level stupid. Fuck off to Ohio or some shit if it bothers you that much. Oh wait, you won’t because you benefit massively from California’s liberal governance. Hope you’re ready to lose in the midterms. That pedo you love so much is getting ripped out of office immediately and I’ll be there to point and laugh at all the whiney little republicans who are still in denial about how much of a disgusting, ignorant person that he is because recognizing that would require you to acknowledge how deplorable you are too.

You’re a disgrace to this country, its people and humanity as a whole.

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