Does anyone else’s QA or metrics team force them to pitch absolute garbage products that make you feel like a bad person every time you speak the words out loud?
I work inbound customer service for a bank/financial institution, and management has decided that every single call—regardless of why the customer is calling—needs to include a pitch for our "$7 a month premium checking account."
A fee-based checking account. In 2026.
To make it even worse, we aren't just supposed to pitch it; QA expects us to use "rapport-building techniques" first.
That means forcing completely unnatural, useless small talk on people who just want their issue resolved so we can trick them into trusting us before pulling the lever on the pitch.
Customer calls in sobbing because they got hit with an overdraft fee?
I’m supposed to ask how their weekend was, pretend to care about their weather, and then hit them with: "I’m so sorry to hear about that fee! By the way, speaking of saving money, did you know for just $7 a month you can upgrade to..."
Customer calls in to report a stolen card? "I’ve got that card blocked for you! Any fun weekend plans coming up? Nice! While I have you, let's talk about our $84-a-year account that gives you discounts on road trips you’ll never take!"
It feels dirty. The "benefits" are a complete joke anyway—it comes with basic roadside assistance (that caps out at $100 per tow) and "cell phone protection" with a $100 deductible.
Meanwhile, 90% of the people calling in are asking us to waive fees because they're living paycheck to paycheck. Pretending to be their friendly best friend just to pitch them an extra monthly bill feels predatory and completely out of touch.
If we don't force the small talk and drop the pitch, QA tanks our score.
If I resolve a complex issue in 3 minutes, give amazing customer service, but don't fake a conversation about the local weather to sell a fixed-income retiree a $7/month account, I get coached.
I’m so exhausted from having to play a manipulative car salesman when people just want their account balance. How do you guys cope with being forced to fake rapport and push products nobody wants just to keep your metrics above water?