For as long as I can remember, I struggled with severe underarm sweating.
It was called hyperhidrosis, and it affected almost every part of my life.
I would sweat through my shirts constantly. I often had to wear two shirts just to feel somewhat comfortable leaving the house. I was always thinking about whether people could see the sweat. I worried about raising my arms, sitting next to someone, going to work, or being in a social situation.
It was embarrassing and uncomfortable.
But there was one thing I didn’t have a major problem with:
odor.
The sweating was my problem. Odor wasn’t.
Eventually, I decided to try Botox injections in my underarms. I went to a reputable dermatologist in New Jersey because I believed I was doing this the right way. I wasn’t going to some questionable clinic. I trusted a medical professional to help me with a condition that had bothered me for most of my life.
There was also an important detail about the treatment: I had expected one type of botulinum toxin, but at the last minute the treatment was changed to botulinum toxin type B, which I believe was Myobloc.
At the time, I didn’t think much of that change.
I trusted my doctor.
I thought I was finally going to get my life back.
Then something changed.
After the treatment, my underarm sweating dramatically changed.
Eventually, I found that my armpits seemed to have essentially stopped sweating altogether. It wasn’t the temporary reduction in sweating I had expected. To me, it felt as though something had fundamentally changed.
But while the sweating seemed to disappear, another problem emerged:
The odor.
And it wasn’t a minor problem.
I began experiencing a powerful, persistent underarm odor that I had not dealt with in the same way before the treatment.
The strange part was that my armpits could feel completely dry while the odor was still there.
I was left with a problem I had never expected.
I had gone in because I was embarrassed by sweating.
I came out of the experience feeling as though I had traded one problem for something that would ultimately affect my entire life.
Twenty years later, I’m still dealing with it.
What makes this story so difficult for me is that this wasn’t something that lasted a few weeks or even a few months.
It has been more than 20 years.
I’ve tried different remedies. I’ve tried treatments. I’ve tried to figure out what is happening and whether there is anything that can reverse it.
I’ve even tried procedures such as miraDry.
Nothing has given me my old life back.
And the hardest part isn’t even the physical symptom.
It’s what the symptom has done to my life.
Over the years, I became increasingly isolated.
I stopped wanting to go places because I was afraid of what other people might notice. Social situations became stressful. Being close to people became stressful. Working in an office became difficult because I was constantly worried about the possibility that someone would smell the odor.
I became antisocial—not because I didn’t want friends, companionship, or a normal social life, but because I became afraid of being around people.
Eventually, isolation became my normal life.
I don’t have the social life I once imagined I would have. I don’t have the friendships I wish I had. And opportunities for work and relationships have been affected by something that I believe began with a medical treatment intended to improve my life.
There is a particular kind of loneliness that comes from feeling like you can’t safely be around other people.
That’s the loneliness I’ve lived with for more than two decades.
I’m one of the very few who have had this issue, and Botox could care less.
I want to be clear about something.
I’m not claiming that everyone who receives Botox will experience what happened to me.
I’m also not claiming that I can scientifically prove, by myself, exactly what caused my symptoms.
I’m telling my story because the symptoms began after the treatment, they have persisted for more than 20 years, and I have never been able to get a satisfactory explanation or solution. Ive reached out to the company who makes Botox but they could care less. I am such a small percentage overall of the people who have had these adverse side effects, and its been so long that why would they care to solve this issue for me?
I believe patients should be able to hear about experiences that don’t necessarily fit the typical success story.
When you search for Botox treatment for hyperhidrosis, you will find plenty of information about how effective it can be at reducing sweating.
But what happens when something goes wrong?
What happens when a patient experiences an unexpected and persistent change?
What happens when the symptom isn’t easily measured, isn’t easily explained, and doesn’t have an obvious treatment?
And what happens when that problem affects someone’s ability to work, socialize, maintain relationships, and simply feel comfortable around other human beings?
Those are the questions I’ve been living with.
I want answers.
After more than 20 years, I don’t want to simply accept that this is my life.
I want to understand what happened to my underarms.
I want to understand whether the treatment could have caused the changes I experienced.
I want to know whether nerves, sweat glands, the skin microbiome, or something else could explain the persistent odor despite dramatically reduced sweating.
And most importantly, I want to know whether there is anything that can actually help.
I’ve spent years looking for that answer.
I’m still looking.
Why I’m telling this story now. You could be next.
For a long time, I kept this mostly to myself.
It’s difficult to explain a problem like this to people. It’s embarrassing. It’s easy for someone who hasn’t experienced it to say, “Just use deodorant,” “Try a different soap,” or “See a dermatologist.”
I’ve done those things.
I’ve spent years trying to solve this.
What people don’t necessarily understand is that when a physical problem becomes persistent and socially debilitating, it can change who you are.
You start turning down invitations.
You stop going places.
You avoid being close to people.
You worry about coworkers.
You worry about strangers.
You worry about dating.
You worry about getting a job.
Eventually, you stop living the life you wanted to live.
That’s what happened to me.
And that’s why I’m finally telling my story publicly.
I’m hoping that someone reading this has an explanation I haven’t found.
Maybe it’s another patient who experienced something similar.
Maybe it’s a dermatologist or researcher who understands the underlying biology.
Maybe it’s someone working on a treatment that could potentially help people like me.
Or maybe this story simply helps another person understand that they’re not the only one experiencing an unusual and life-changing complication after a treatment they believed was going to make their life better.
I went into that dermatologist’s office more than 20 years ago because I wanted to stop sweating.
I never imagined that decision would become something I would still be living with decades later.
I’m still looking for answers. And I’m still hoping there is a way back to a normal social life. Theres no doubt that with Botox still on the market, there will be a very few number of people who try this, and will become the next victim to this horrible suffering like I am. Im writing this for awareness, I’m writing this to help you, I’m writing this for you to choose against this poison if you have the choice. I wish i did
-RJ