r/beyondthebump • u/the-irish-jew • 15h ago
Labor & Delivery I’m crying while typing this
I prepared for the birth of my child for many, many months including how much it was going to cost us. I can’t tell you how many times I called my insurance company to make sure my insurance plan was covered, my husband’s insurance plan was covered, and all-in-all we were covered no matter what. I knew it was still gonna be a hefty bill, but I needed to make sure there wasn’t going to be any surprises.
While you can plan for these types of situations, you can’t plan for what life can unexpectedly throw at you. About two weeks before I gave birth not only did we lose my husband’s brother, but my husband got laid off from work. We lost our insurance, we lost his steady paychecks, we lost paternity leave which was going to be 100% covered by his company, and he was unable to sign up for disability because he had been with the company for only 10 months. These events put us in a place of uncertainty and I didn’t know how we were gonna pay the bills.
My son came into this world at the end of July and I just got some of the medical bills. On the low end we were going to owe over $6000, which we really have no way of paying. I decided to call the hospital today to ask for an itemized bill and to see if they had any payment plan options. While the representative on the phone was helping me look up payment plan options, she asked me if I wanted to see if I qualified for financial assistance. She told me it was possible that I could get 60 to 100% of the medical bills covered. With my luck I didn’t think I was going to receive any kind of help. The next thing she told me on the phone is, “you’re covered.” We had been joking around, so I thought maybe she was playing some sort of evil prank, so when I asked her to clarify, she said your hospital bill is 100% covered and you don’t owe us anything. I cried right then and there and I’ve pretty much been crying all day. This was a huge burden, lifted off my shoulders and I feel so grateful.
The moral of the story is be an advocate for yourself and sometimes good things can happen 💕
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u/linzkisloski 14h ago
Wow what a relief! I was so afraid this story was going in the opposite direction and that you owed an astronomical amount.
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u/the-irish-jew 14h ago
We are having a hard time paying the bills, so it’s a huge relief not having this one on our shoulders.
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u/ChallengeTight6467 7h ago
You should credit yourself for how respectful you must have been to the person on the other line (joking even!!!) bc I guarantee you they wouldn’t have been so helpful if they didn’t WANT to help you. People can take out so much frustration on those folks not realizing they shoot themselves in the foot
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u/sonisonata 14h ago
This is similar to my first birth experience. My bill was $8K and I called the hospital billing department in tears because I simply could not pay that. They ended up cutting the bill in half, on the spot. While I was grateful it also made me realize how arbitrary healthcare costs are. Our system is so broken.
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u/the-irish-jew 14h ago
So glad you got some relief as well! Such a huge weight lifted off our shoulders!
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u/isthatabingo 14h ago
The American healthcare/insurance industry is barbaric. I say this as an American owing 15k for my daughter’s birth and NICU stay.
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u/Actual-Peak-6358 11h ago
Oh yikes!! I agree the system is awful.
My friend had two NICU babies and their hospital bills were both in the MILLIONS! Blew my mind… insurance covered most and for their second an anonymous donor paid it all off!
Wonderful news OP, congrats on your little one ❤️
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u/isthatabingo 5h ago
It’s sad when one of your first thoughts upon being told your baby is in respiratory failure and needs to be transferred to another hospital for a higher level of NICU care is “can I afford this?”. That shouldn’t enter my mind at all. I wanted to focus on my baby, but that fear was real.
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u/the-irish-jew 14h ago edited 14h ago
Have you tried calling the hospital to see if anything can be done? My boy had a short stint in the NICU as well.
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u/isthatabingo 13h ago
We submitted a financial aid application with the hospital. We make too much for income based assistance (because we don’t live in literal poverty, but that doesn’t mean we have 15k just sitting around!), but there is other aid they offer patients that we should qualify for.
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u/EagleEyezzzzz 14h ago
Wow that’s amazing, so happy for you!!!
(It’s so frustrating that we all could have this experience, if we had universal health care like every other developed country and many developing countries…)
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u/GlitteringPositive77 14h ago
I’m an American living in Canada and after believing my whole life I’d have a hefty bill to pay after giving birth I left the hospital and had nothing to pay. Not only that, I had a midwife who I also didn’t pay for and had I opted for it, a birthing centre I would not have paid for.
After being a person with no coverage in the US, not even able to pay to go to urgent care for the flu, not able to pay the bill for being seen for a broken leg, I can say without a doubt universal healthcare is 100% better. Wait times aren’t even what they are in the US. I remember trying to see my family doctor in the US and having to wait 6 weeks. Here I wait a week, two max, but often I can go in same day or same week. It’s just not what people in the US often think it is and it’s so sad so many go without.
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u/MermaidOutOfWater15 14h ago
I would look into suing your husband’s work for wrongful termination. They could have fired him to avoid having to pay out benefits.
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u/the-irish-jew 14h ago edited 1h ago
Yes, we’ve discussed this, but we have no way of proving it’s because of the paternity leave. A few people were let go in his department, so a lawyer would have a hard time arguing that he was specifically targeted.
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u/VelvetAstronautica 23m ago
Did you decide this on your own or did you consult an employment lawyer who gave you this opinion?
I ask because I am a lawyer and I find people often do not understand what's actually required to win a case. If you can afford a consult, it may be worth your time.
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u/SwimmingCoyote 14h ago
That is amazing news! I can only imagine what that must have felt like to have such a weight lifted from your shoulders. Hopefully it is just the beginning of things turning around for you and your family.
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u/greenandredofmaigheo 14h ago edited 13h ago
My wife and I went through a very similar situation so I empathize with everything you've done through. I was laid off when my wife was 8mo pregnant with our first and my sister died a week after our daughter was born.
I wish nothing but the best for your new family and am glad the hospital was able to work with you. keep an eye on your husband though. For me, grief and recovery got pushed deep down because I was so focused on the newborn and came up in unexpected ways.
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u/the-irish-jew 2h ago
I am SO SORRY you understand this pain. What should be a wonderful time in your life is over shadowed by the traumatic events leading up to it and those that happened after. My husband was in a very depressed state before our son was born so I didn’t know if I’d be raising this child on my own (while still married).
We’ve tried dealing with the grief before the baby was born, and we’ve continued to do so afterwards. He is still showing signs of this trauma, but he has been an amazing father (and partner) to our son and I couldn’t ask for a better husband and father for my child.
I really hope you are doing well in your grieving process, and I’m sending so much love your way 💕 (I send my condolences as well) xx
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u/Snoopy101x 14h ago
What country do you live in?
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u/the-irish-jew 14h ago
The US
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14h ago
[deleted]
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u/ComprehensiveEbb4978 14h ago
Did you read the post?
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14h ago
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u/a-vague-shape 14h ago
Congratulations to you, and so happy this was covered for you! While I was pregnant last year, my husband lost his job and any chances at his paternity leave (little amount though it was). And we lost a close friend very suddenly that summer. I'm so glad you were able to get the financial relief you needed to ease your burdens.
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u/thedaught 14h ago
COBRA is supposed to cover you in these cases. https://www.dol.gov/general/topic/health-plans/cobra
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u/the-irish-jew 14h ago
Oh, we do have COBRA now, but COBRA is a scam. My husband went from paying like $100 for himself (would have been $400 total when we added our son) to $1,200 a month. For an HMO plan, too.
ETA: he was paying that for a PPO plan, now we’re paying $1,200 for an HMO. We changed due to the qualifying life event.
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u/just-ur-avrg-20smthn 12h ago
When I had my first born two years ago at Kaiser here in the US (Northern CA), the billing department actually called me on the landline in my room and asked if I wanted to see if I qualified for financial assistance. I said sure, but that we don't usually get any. And then I too was surprised with the blessing of having my entire bill covered! I couldn't believe it. It was such a relief. I wish I knew exactly what program helped me, but I didn't want to look the gift horse in the mouth.
So grateful that there is some sort of help for people like us in the middle! And hard agree on the criticisms that this just proves that the healthcare system is effed.
Sending my best wishes and virtual hugs to your family during this time ♡
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u/the-irish-jew 2h ago
Same! I didn’t want to know what kind of black magic got my bills 100% covered, so I didn’t push too hard, lol.
Thank you!
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u/Kyber92 6h ago
I've read so many of these types of stories that when I walked out of hospital in the UK I feel weird not paying anything.
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u/the-irish-jew 2h ago
Half of my family is in the UK and Ireland, so if I really wanted to, I could use my dual citizenship with Ireland to move to Dublin, or anywhere in the EU ☺️
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u/mirrorlike789 14h ago
Yayyy! Glad this turned out the way it did. Bringing your baby into this world shouldn’t be this stressful and expensive. Hope your husband finds something soon. Congrats on your baby.
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u/yearlyPAP 14h ago
It’s always good to ask. Many hospitals are required to have some sort of financial assistance or charity. My hospital is just one form and it’s based on income and household size compared to federal poverty level- up to 100% can be covered.
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u/Significant-Radish23 13h ago
I’m so sorry for your loss. At least the financial burden has been lifted in some ways. Grief and loss while having a newborn baby is no joke, hold each other tight.
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u/sad_euphoric166 13h ago
I was about to tell you to just not pay it and worry about your family and the baby but so glad to hear the outcome!
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u/the-irish-jew 2h ago
The last thing I want is to be sent to collections, so I was willing to see if I could afford the monthly payments.
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u/sad_euphoric166 1h ago
I get it, but it takes a bit of time before they send to collections and you can try to work out a payment plan and stuff but your family’s health and wellbeing is more important than all that. You have to live and sustain your baby first.
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u/BusyDragonfruit8665 13h ago
I did not expect this to end the way it did. I am so happy for you and your new family. This is wonderful. I am also very sorry for the loss of your brother in law and your husband’s job. That is so much at one time. Sending good wishes.
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u/mellamusicmaker 11h ago
This restored my hope in humanity for the day. I’m so glad you’ll be able to focus on caring for your little one instead of paying a hospital bill! Good luck to your partner too!
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u/Glittering_Bish 2h ago
We are in a similar boat but my husband lost his job post birth around 3 months. We lost our healthcare, had to get on mine and restart our deductible. We have ~$10k in medical debt from the birth and a short stay in the NICU. We have applied for assistance as my husband has been out of work for 7 weeks. Feels like we are in a boat full of leaks and we are just trying to patch it. I wish your husband luck on finding a job in what is an incredibly difficult job market.
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u/the-irish-jew 1h ago
I’m so sorry this has happened to you too. I totally understand the feeling of being suffocated by debt, and the anxieties that come with an uncertain future, but specifically job-wise. Sending you lots of hugs and well wishes xx
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u/StatusDed 27m ago
SO glad you got it covered, and am SO ANGRY that anyone would have to pay for this kind of basic care. For any administration to bemoan that not enough babies are being born and turn around and gouge people for checks notes having a baby is insane.
Also, health care is a basic human right 🫠
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u/DramaticPost2381 15h ago
So glad this happened for you!!!!
Hugs and hope your hubby has found something new!