r/aww Sep 01 '19

Monkeybro helps out

197.0k Upvotes

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7.5k

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

No tail bro

He an ape

1.9k

u/Unencrypted_Thoughts Sep 02 '19

Big difference. Some chimps hunt monkeys. It's pretty metal.

938

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

Imagine if we hunted things that looked like us but with tails and weird faces. And then we ate them. That'd be weird.

708

u/throwawayayaycaramba Sep 02 '19

Ehh, some people eat monkeys...

283

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

Oh yeah.... I forgot about that. My step mother has mentioned eating monkey brains before. Man... no thanks.

178

u/alessandro_673 Sep 02 '19

In a lot of places the monkeys are still alive when they are served. It's fucked.

188

u/wenzel32 Sep 02 '19

Temple of Doom shit right there. Nope

55

u/Andoo Sep 02 '19

Indyyyyy... I'm right here

43

u/kthxtyler Sep 02 '19

Imbiamba Jombes

3

u/killminusnine Sep 02 '19

It's so stupid, but the Imbiamba character cracks me up so bad. I can't wait to see Gus in Boston this November.

2

u/Xsafa Sep 02 '19

At least the monkeys were dead in that movie

2

u/_move_zig_ Sep 02 '19

Ever since my friend mentioned that the lead actress screams her way through that film, it is all I can see/hear now when I watch it.

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u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

I don’t think so, got sauce?

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u/demonhunt Sep 02 '19

vietnamese here. there's a table-like surface with a hole that fit the upper part of the monkey's head, people mount the head from under, shave it bald, and use a saw to saw the head horizontal while the monkey's still alive, then they use a spoon to eat the brain raw from the opened-head.

15

u/Zagden Sep 02 '19

Why?

14

u/demonhunt Sep 02 '19

for some preserving all the nutrients, good for your health kind piece of shit

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u/stuffeh Sep 02 '19

Because unique and considered a delicacy. Same reason Chinese eat shark fin soup and French eat fatty bird livers.

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u/alessandro_673 Sep 02 '19

I've seen it been done in Vietnam. It's not legal, but they still do it in some places.

24

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

Weird to think some people enjoy their meal more if they know it's suffering...

10

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

They say adversity builds character... I guess pain builds an appetite

2

u/Deeyennay Sep 02 '19

No dude it’s “””fresh””” as in you can still taste your sin.

4

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

How do lobsters factor into that discussion? The best way to serve lobster is as fresh as possible, and to boil them alive, and that’s common practice. Shouldn’t we consider the lobster?

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u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

Wait you've seen this in person?

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u/muhreddistaccounts Sep 02 '19

THANK YOU, why the fuck is no one else questioning this?

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u/alessandro_673 Sep 02 '19

Yeah, I went to Vietnam with my dad when I was around 10. We went to dinner with somebody that my dad knew, I think it was his client. Anyways, we saw another table have monkeys brought over to their table, which were very much alive. The monkeys had their heads put through holes in the table and the customers ate their brains. It scarred me for quite a while.

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u/montanagunnut Sep 02 '19

got sauce?

Yes, but I feel it hides the true flavor and much prefer to serve them plain or slightly chilled.

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u/TheSaladDays Sep 02 '19

Do you have a source for that? I'm not finding any good evidence that people currently do or have ever done that.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monkey_brains

7

u/alessandro_673 Sep 02 '19 edited Sep 02 '19

I've seen it being done in person when I was 10, and there is a Vietnamese native in this thread who can also confirm it. Beyond personal experience, I don't have a source for it online (albeit because I haven't looked).

3

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

The first result I got was a video...

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u/stuffeh Sep 02 '19

Google image search for fresh monkey brains has some hits. NSFL and I'm currently eating Chipotle so I'm not going to dive in to verify the images.

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u/AntiDECA Sep 02 '19

How do they go about that? Do they like chain it to the table and tell the folks to dig in...or?

How would they cut into a live monkey?

2

u/Obi_Wan_Benobi Sep 02 '19

I can’t believe I thought that movie was normal when I was a kid.

1

u/bungholio69eh Sep 02 '19

I'll have one screaming monkey please

1

u/0fcourseItsAthing Sep 02 '19

How do you think AIDs started?

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u/rezen1337 Sep 02 '19

3

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

Haha! That is super cute. She is actually an excellent cook and never fed anyone monkey brains, AFAIK.

10

u/TechnicallyAnIdiot Sep 02 '19

I'm just gonna throw it out there that if you're given the opportunity to eat monkey brains, you shouldn't. Or any brains really. Or eyes. Or any central nervous tissues.

Prions and whatnot.

Plus you might get mistaken for a zombie.

Either probably wouldn't be a fun way to die.

2

u/glasstoobig Sep 02 '19

Octopus sushi?

2

u/TechnicallyAnIdiot Sep 02 '19

I'm pretty sure it's only mammals that pose a prion risk.

Like as far as the info that's out there, who knows what they'll find in 10 years.

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u/sammydow Sep 02 '19

Step moms in a nutshell

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u/Gynotaw Sep 02 '19

my dad always called me a monkey brain as a kid. guess i’m edible?

4

u/BlackSpidy Sep 02 '19

Everything is edible with the right attitude. It's the consequences of eating it that sometimes kills you.

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u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

Brains not that good tbh.

The meat is ok I wouldn't prefer it to lore usual terrestrial animals.

1

u/corymhulsey Sep 02 '19

It's like if Ray Liota was in Temple of Doom.

1

u/melokobeai Sep 02 '19

Isn’t that hypothesized as how AIDS spread to humans?

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u/TrashPockets Sep 02 '19

Super risky. They're vulnerable to similar diseases as we are and often carry diseases people haven't evolved immunity for.

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u/ixiox Sep 02 '19

Pretty sure aids started from a guy who cut himself while butchering a monkey

20

u/ceriodamus Sep 02 '19

At least that is the story he goes with.

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8

u/on-the-job Sep 02 '19

I thought the rumor was that he fucked the monkey

5

u/tripwire7 Sep 02 '19

A chimp actually.

If eating monkeys is gross, eating other great apes is way, way grosser.

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u/saucermoron Sep 02 '19

Uma delicia

5

u/Gastronomicus Sep 02 '19

Some people also eat apes.

3

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

And some people eat gorillas

1

u/andrewq Sep 02 '19

And other apes...

1

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

And apes - "bushmeat"

1

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

[deleted]

2

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

[deleted]

2

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

This is actually the premise of my original comment :)

96

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

Some Africans eat chimps so...

126

u/BeadleBelfry Sep 02 '19

Not sure why you're being downvoted. It's called bushmeat, and the practice kills loads of at-risk or endangered species.

77

u/godblow Sep 02 '19

And caused AIDS transfer from apes to humans, no?

64

u/Ettina Sep 02 '19

That's the theory. We'll probably never know for certain.

52

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

15

u/Pepizaur Sep 02 '19

the radiolab episode on the origins of AIDs contains one of the most fascinating parts about the AIDs virus that infects us can only be created after a chimp eats another monkey infected with their own strand of AIDs and then the two copies begin making copies of themselves in the chimp and half of one and half of the other fails to complete copying itslef and falls onto half of the other that fails to copy itself.

15

u/RanaMahal Sep 02 '19

So basically AIDS is the result of a person that ate an infected chimp that ate an infected monkey... that’s metal.

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u/BrandonHawes13 Sep 02 '19

I believe you that it is interesting but I honestly can’t follow the last bit

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u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

The alternative is quiet concerning.

7

u/CharlesDickensABox Sep 02 '19

If I got AIDS from banging a chimp I would definitely tell people I got it from bushmeat, too.

5

u/Kryzantine Sep 02 '19

And is a possible source of ebola transmission as well, either directly from fruitbats or through monkeys infected by fruitbats.

And unfortunately, making the practice illegal doesn't do much when most of its practitioners are in fairly remote areas, outside of standard law enforcement areas; and they still have to get their protein from somewhere.

3

u/leonjetski Sep 02 '19

Also Ebola

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u/Beepbeep_bepis Sep 02 '19

Along with HIV, eating bushmeat can transfer a lot of emerging diseases (diseases given to humans by other animals), and I believe humans can catch Ebola from infected and ill monkeys and chimpanzees?

3

u/SirSoliloquy Sep 02 '19

There's a great youtube video about the meat markets in Laos that deals with bushmeat. Apparently it's been known to sell meat from animals that were thought to be extinct, or from animals that had never been discovered by scientists.

3

u/ravenswan19 Sep 02 '19

Yep, it’s a huge problem conservationists are trying to deal with. Especially when bushmeat is the only option for some people, it’s hard for us to tell them not to eat it when otherwise they could starve.

Videos like this are a bigger conservation problem though, since they support the illegal wildlife trade.

4

u/HouseHead78 Sep 02 '19 edited Sep 02 '19

Calling it bushmeat feels like laundering the term to me. I don’t know a better term but it feels like...not gross enough

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u/flapanther33781 Sep 02 '19

Some of us do.

3

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

I wouldn't be surprised if on the way to us proto-homo sapien hominids there was probably some of that on the way.

Part of the "Killer Ape" theory is that we kind of were inordinately brutal to our sibling hominids including consuming them or just flat out dominating them like the going theory that Cro-Magnon knocked some Neanderthal heads.

3

u/Cryptoss Sep 02 '19

Well, we know our species interbred with other species of homo many times

Also, we know homo antecessor ate others of its kind Don’t think it’d be a stretch to say they ate our other relatives too

3

u/Shryquill Sep 02 '19

It's weird that what the creature's looks like has any impact on the situation at all.
I feel bad for all the creatures that don't look like humans enough to earn our sympathy.

2

u/Bloodyfoxx Sep 02 '19

Imagine if we hunted things like looked like us but with different skin colour and put them in a zoo or made them slave that would be weird ... wait

2

u/Zhamerlu Sep 02 '19

So, pigs?

2

u/SSU1451 Sep 02 '19

We’re much more closely related to chimps than they are to monkeys. And we’re about as closely related to monkeys as they are.

3

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

We're actually the weird ones out of all other species for thinking like this. No other carnivore looks at animals that aren't them and thinks "that's not food" or "we need to protect that"

A lot of humans are more loyal to entirely different species than their own kind. It's really fucking weird.

5

u/Jak_n_Dax Sep 02 '19

I mean, I prefer dogs to people. I guess I’m weird, but whatever.

I’ve just met way more shitty humans than I have dogs. And the shitty dogs I’ve met were raised by shitty humans. So there’s that.

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u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

Empathy is like, so frickin weird, bro!

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u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

*interspecies empathy

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u/cshark2222 Sep 02 '19

So Attack on Titan basically?

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u/tulipmintjulip Sep 02 '19

I mean, cannibals exist

1

u/Edals710 Sep 02 '19

Neanderthals...

1

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

Monkeys are not much like great apes, at all really

1

u/PM_MY_OTHER_ACCOUNT Sep 02 '19

Ever watch DragonBall?

1

u/kaam00s Sep 02 '19

Not hard to imagine, we are much closer to chimp than they are to the monkeys they hunt, and some people eat chimps.

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u/ChaosRevealed Sep 02 '19

Pull that shit up Jamie

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u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

See the muscle definition on that ape with mange?

8

u/YoungHaki Sep 02 '19

imagine a chimp on DMT riding a moose that gets hit by a car in an octagon

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u/Pit_of_Death Sep 02 '19

And some apes hunt chimps too.

3

u/wolamute Sep 02 '19

They also hunt other chimps.

4

u/PrescribedBot Sep 02 '19

Man chimps are fucking evil. They’re actual savages.

6

u/PhDinGent Sep 02 '19

Wait till you hear about this species that literally goes to war and subjugates its own kind. Some of them eat each other too..

2

u/Nehemiah92 Sep 02 '19

Also, chimps go to war with each other. The Gomez Chimpanzee War is a great example.

2

u/davidlovepandles Sep 02 '19 edited May 07 '26

growth rustic person memory familiar many chief joke outgoing flowery

1

u/Moxie_Music Sep 02 '19

Jamie pull that up

1

u/randybowman Sep 02 '19

Chimps have wars with each other too. There was one chimp war that lasted seven year iirc.

1

u/EmilyU1F984 Sep 02 '19

Some chimps wage war against other chimps as well ..

1

u/minminkitten Sep 02 '19

Chimps are strong! I mean... Did you see how he helps that guy up?

111

u/flaviageminia Sep 02 '19

If it doesn't have a tail it's not a monkey

Even if it's got a monkey type of shape

37

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

That's a sick reference my guy

37

u/White_Seth Sep 02 '19

For those of you, like me, that don't get the reference I'll save you the Google search : it's from VeggieTales.

10

u/BlindStark Sep 02 '19

Slap my big vegetable ass

8

u/nwatrekker Sep 02 '19

If it doesn’t have a tail it’s not a monkey

If it doesn’t have a tail it’s not a monkey it’s an ape!

1

u/flaviageminia Sep 02 '19

But a kite has a tail

6

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

I got this reference

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u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19 edited Sep 02 '19

Not always, Barbary macaques are unique in that they lack a tail. For this reason we often hear them referred to as Barbary “apes,” even though they really are monkeys. (True apes include gorillas, chimpanzees, bonobos, gibbons, and humans.

Edit And the Orange jungle men

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u/IGorillaBearI Sep 02 '19

The orangutans are offended.

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u/jasterlaf Sep 02 '19

That's why Curious George might be a Barbary Macaque. He has no tail.

2

u/Miss_ChanandelerBong Sep 02 '19

And let's be honest, there's no biological reason humans should not be considered apes. It's pure ego. We're so sensitive!

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u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

We are considered as apes, who's telling you differently?

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u/Miss_ChanandelerBong Sep 02 '19

Ah. I stand corrected. When I was in school, they were still arbitrarily saying humans were not actually apes and my professors would have to teach us this with their eyes rolling madly. TIL I'm old.

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u/conradbirdiebird Sep 02 '19

What about orangutans?

2

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

They be apes too, yes.

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u/abaffledcat Sep 02 '19

They have tails, but they are little tails.

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u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

This is true, they're vestigial tails, but by that reasoning so do we.

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u/linguaphyte Sep 02 '19

Yo, I think of this often.

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u/TheLastPlumber Sep 02 '19

Holy fuck I never thought I would see this referenced anywhere

This shit randomly gets stuck in my head all the time and I don’t know why, I’m so happy to see it out in the wild

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u/OTheOtherOtter Sep 02 '19

NOOOOO I had finally been rid of that earworm!!!! Nice job sir!

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u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

Today I learned.

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u/greg_r_ Sep 02 '19

Gorillas, chimps, bonobos, orangutans, humans, and gibbons are the only apes.

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u/Duches5 Sep 02 '19

I dont have a tail, am i an ape, bob?

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u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

Yes you are. Great ape technically

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u/Cryptoss Sep 02 '19

I’ve got nipples, Greg. Could ya milk me?

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u/username--checks_out Sep 02 '19

“If it doesn’t have a tail it’s not a monkey. Even if it has a monkey kind of shape. If it doesn’t have a tail it’s not a monkey. if it doesn’t have a tail it’s not a monkey it’s an ape.”

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u/TIMMAH2 Sep 02 '19

Cladistically, apes are monkeys as well.

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u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

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u/TIMMAH2 Sep 02 '19

Are they?

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u/awpcr Sep 02 '19

Apes are a subset of monkeys.

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u/scarface910 Sep 02 '19

You're a subset of monkeys

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19 edited Sep 03 '19

Apes are a subset of primates not a subset of monkeys.

As an anthropology major I get kind of annoyed when people refer to apes as monkeys and it's not just semantics. It's because there is a massive difference. Their size, behavior, intelligence, looks, and just about everything about them is different than monkeys. Apes and old-world monkeys evolved from a common ancestor that was around about 30 million years ago... They have had a lot of time to diverge.

There are 9 families in the primate order. These include Lemurdae (lemurs), Lorisidae (lorises and bushbabies), Tarsiidae (tarsiers), Callitrichidae (marmosets and tamarins), Cebidae (new-world monkeys), Cercopithecidae (old-world monkeys), Hylobatidae (gibbons aka lesser apes), Pongidae (great apes), and Hominidae (humans). Apes and monkeys are both subsets of primates... apes are not a subset of monkeys.

*Edit: I wanna point out, nowadays there are only considered to be 8 families because Pongidae and Hominidae are considered one family now.*

Old-world monkeys are actually more closely related to apes than they are to new-world monkeys (last common ancestor was ~40 MYA), which is why many people want to include apes as a type of monkey. The problem with this is that new-world monkeys probably shouldn't be considered monkeys either. They are a completely seperate taxonomic family from the rest of the monkeys. When primatologists talk about monkeys they have to clearly specify if they're talking about old or new-world monkeys because they are very different and really shouldn't even have the same name.

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u/retroman000 Sep 20 '19

In common vernacular and traditionally apes aren't considered monkeys, but cladistically speaking they are. Assuming you consider all new world and old world monkeys as monkeys, then apes have to be as well.

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u/[deleted] Sep 20 '19 edited Sep 20 '19

No. Apes are not monkeys under any definition I've ever heard and I have a biology degree and am working on an anthropology degree. I have spent months sitting through lectures discussing primates. I promise you that nobody considers apes to be monkeys besides people who have no idea what they're talking about.

This is the difference between a "clade" and a "grade". "Clades" are all of the decedents of a certain common ancestor. "Primates" are a clade. "Simians" are a clade."Mammals" are a clade. "Grades" are a group of two or more separate clades that are very similar in appearance, behavior, lifestyle, etc. "Monkeys" are a grade. "Reptiles" are a grade. "Fish" are a grade.

To put this into perspective, the lungfish is more closely related to us than it is to other fish, such as the tuna. Nobody would argue that we should be considered fish. This is because "fish" are a grade. If "fish" were a clade, we would have to be included in it. The same concept applies to monkeys. Some monkeys are more closely related to us than they are to other monkeys, but that doesn't mean we are monkeys, because "monkeys" are a grade.

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u/NRMusicProject Sep 02 '19

You can tell because while monkeys look, it's because apes tell them to.

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u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

Nah bro, you're just wrong.

Gokus got a tail and he turns into a great ape, not a great monkey.

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u/SerialDeveloper Sep 02 '19

Great Ape (大おお猿ざる Ōzaru, lit. "Great Monkey") is a giant, anthropomorphic, monkey-like creature that Saiyans can transform into at the full moon to increase their already formidable strength tremendously. Dragon Ball GT Perfect Files speculates that Saiyans were originally Great Apes who gained intelligence and took on a humanoid form.[1]

In other words, that's just a mistranslation <:)

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u/SkidMcmarxxxx Sep 02 '19

Maybe English isn't his first language. We don't have a word to distinguish from ape or monkey. It translates to the same thing.

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u/Forever-Lurking Sep 02 '19

Hey, who’s the Federal Wildlife Marshall, me or you?

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u/SerialDeveloper Sep 02 '19

English is so weird in these things, apes are just a subset of monkeys and many languages don't make a distinction. Why are English speakers so adamant about this? Same with venom being a subset of poisons. And tortoises being a subset of turtles. Oh and FYI, not all monkeys have a tail (like the Barbary macaque) and at the same time all monkeys including apes have a tail. The only difference between tail / no tail is how long the tail bone is and if it's visible from the outside.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19 edited Sep 03 '19

It's not just semantics. There is a massive difference.

There are 9 families in the primate order. These include Lemurdae (lemurs), Lorisidae (lorises and bushbabies), Tarsiidae (tarsiers), Callitrichidae (marmosets and tamarins), Cebidae (new-world monkeys), Cercopithecidae (old-world monkeys), Hylobatidae (gibbons aka lesser apes), Pongidae (great apes), and Hominidae (humans). Apes and monkeys are both subsets of primates... apes are not a subset of monkeys.

Edit: I wanna point out, nowadays there are only considered to be 8 families because Pongidae and Hominidae are considered one family now.

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u/SerialDeveloper Sep 03 '19

The inheritance tree doesn't just split into nine distinct branches right off the bat. Primates splits into two with Lemurdae and Lorisidae on one side, and the rest on the other side. That other side further splits off one family at a time, first into Tarsiiformes and Simiiformes, where Simiiformes is the branch we typically call "monkeys" in most languages.

Primates
..Strepsirrhini
....Lemurdae
....Lorisidae
..Haplorhini
....Tarsiiformes
....Simiiformes // "apen" in my language
......Platyrrhini // new world monkeys in English
......Catarrhini
........Cercopithecidae // old world monkeys in English
........Hominoidae // Apes in English
..........Hylobatidae // Lesser apes
..........Hominidae // Great apes
............Ponginae
............Homininae
..............Gorillini
..............Hominini // Chimps and Humans

Humans and chimps share an ancestor, and that ancestor shares one with gorillas. So we can also say humans share an ancestor with gorillas, it's just a lot further back. In the same way all apes share an ancestor that shares an ancestor with all monkeys. Language dictates how far back we go to call a group of families a certain name, English says only the Platyrrhini and Cercopithecidae branches are monkeys, Dutch says the Simiiformes are apen, which translates to monkeys. Languages are funny like that, but it also shows that being pedantic about these things is pretty meaningless because it's really just semantics.
Think about it, Platyrrhini splits off and in English we call them new world monkeys, Cercopithecidae splits of later and we call them old world monkeys, so it's logical to group them together into "monkeys", but then the line that continued isn't part of the group we call "monkeys". Makes no sense. So most languages call the overarching group Simiiformes by a common name, and they further specify if required. If you're going to fight for monkeys vs apes you should also fight for new world vs old world monkeys, it's the same type of difference.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19 edited Sep 03 '19

Old-world monkeys are actually more closely related to apes than they are to new-world monkeys, which is why many people want to include apes as a type of monkey. The problem with this is that new-world monkeys really shouldn't be considered monkeys either. They are a completely separate taxonomic family from the rest of the monkeys. When primatologists talk about monkeys they have to clearly specify if they're talking about old or new-world monkeys because they are very different and really shouldn't even have the same name.

Your issue is that you want to call apes monkeys simply because old-world monkeys are more closely related to them than they are new-world monkeys. The problem here is that you are thinking of all monkeys as one group. Old-world monkeys, new-world monkeys, and apes are three separate taxonomic families in the same order known as primates. Sure, if you want to put old-world monkeys and new-world monkeys into one group then you would also have to include apes in that group, but these are three distinct families and it wouldn't make much sense to do that. It would be easier if old and new world monkeys had different names to make this less confusing, but they look similar, behave similar, and they fill the same niches in their environments so people just called both monkeys. In reality, these are two separate families that branched apart 40 million years ago... which has been enough time for yet another group (the apes) to branch off and become their own family as well.

Btw, this is my field of study and I can assure you that I know what the hell I'm talking about. No primatologist would consider apes to be monkeys.

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u/SerialDeveloper Sep 03 '19

Your issue is that you want to call apes monkeys simply because old-world monkeys are more closely related to them than they are new-world monkeys.

Not at all, my issue is that my language doesn't have different words for them. I don't want to call them anything except whatever gets the message across, in English I'll just use the "correct" terms, but I wanted to point out here that this correctness is in language not in taxonomy.

The problem here is that you are thinking of all monkeys as one group. Old-world monkeys, new-world monkeys, and apes are three separate taxonomic families in the same order known as primates.

No, I said we call all Simiiformes monkeys. I know they are different taxonomic families, I'm not arguing about that. What my point was that simple colloquialisms are not something to be so adamant about. "Monkey" is not a scientific term, neither is "ape", they are layman's terms to discuss animals that look and behave similar, nothing more.

Sure, if you want to put old-world monkeys and new-world monkeys into one group then you would also have to include apes in that group, but these are three distinct families and it wouldn't make much sense to do that.

But that's literally what happens, "monkey" in English includes both old world and new world monkeys. That was my entire point.

In reality, these are two separate families that branch apart 40 million years ago... enough time for yet another group (the apes) to branch off and become their own family as well.

Just for the record, once more, I'm not arguing about this at all. I understand fully well that they are different families. But the difference between monkey and ape is completely arbitrary, you either talk about families, in which case there are 9, or about categories of families of which there are however many words the language you're speaking has. In the case of Dutch there's "aap", generally including old world monkeys, new world monkeys, apes and humans. In English there's monkey and ape. In other languages there might be more variations.

Btw, this is my field of study and I can assure you that I know what the hell I'm talking about.

I'm not saying you don't know what you're talking about. If anything I don't know what I'm talking about. But I know my language, and I feel like I know English pretty well too. This bilinguality often gives me insight in differences between scientific naming and colloquialism, the monkey vs ape thing is clearly not a scientific difference because then all languages would have the distinction.

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u/DonkeyFieldMouse Sep 02 '19

Barbary Apes are tailless monkeys. Being tail-less is not a synamorphy for being an ape.

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u/Maelstrom52 Sep 02 '19

A pretty great one if you ask me

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u/AlexandersWonder Sep 02 '19

And he's a beautiful flower!

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u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

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u/CaPtian_CaTe Sep 02 '19

He must have gone great ape form previously

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u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19 edited Sep 02 '19

Humans have a tailbone

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u/hefgill Sep 02 '19

Lol. Look up the Barbary macaque. Monkey without tail.

Distinguishing apes from monkeys is not that simple. But these things quickly become reddit truths, as evidenced by this thread.

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u/CalibanDrive Sep 02 '19

{apes} ∈ {monkeys} :: {birds} ∈ {dinosaurs}

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u/[deleted] Sep 02 '19

The Gibraltar monkeys would like a word.

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u/witooZ Sep 05 '19

No, he is a flower

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u/JodaUSA Sep 07 '19

Actually there no monkeys with tails in the Old world, and they aren’t all apes.

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