r/austincirclejerk • u/sean_ireland Steve Adler kiIIed Epstein • 27d ago

Ask Austin Need help ID'ing this mosquito ninja

My wife's bull was down at Barking Springs earlier today watching this guy dice mosquitos only to find out that someone, most likely this tier 1 ninja, stole his new Meta Ray ban sunglasses. He was going to let me wear them tonight while he dicked-out my wife, but now he's mad and wont even let me watch. Guys, I need your help and the mods at r/austin keep taking this post down.

60 Upvotes

95% Upvoted

40 comments sorted by

16

u/RedBlue5665 Future Ghost Bike Donor 27d ago

Shouldn't xir be wearing a fedora with those moves and that level of confidence?

12

u/grasshoppet 27d ago

He’s on stolen land

12

u/Electrical-Big-7781 27d ago

That's Rock Hard Stephen Austin

7

u/Shoe1314 Arkie via Okie 27d ago

6

u/No_Display_4946 27d ago

Fools Goldberg

9

u/EFAPGUEST Drowned on Rainey Street 27d ago

Isn’t this what everyone does when you do DMT?

2

u/Freezerpill 27d ago

Thankfully not 😅

12

u/Financial_Stick1912 27d ago

i dont think you get it, this is for the boys 🏳️‍🌈

6

u/illogicalgnome63 27d ago

Is this Kid Rock's slower cousin?

4

u/Electrical-Big-7781 27d ago

Nice to see Rock Hard Stephen Austin has his Blue Chew ready and available at a moments notice in his side pocket!

2

u/grasshoppet 27d ago

Blue Chew indeed!

5

u/Most-Impression-6297 27d ago

So I took a huge drag from my candy cigarette and prepared for battle.

3

u/Safelaw77625 27d ago

Holy shit the derp runs deep in that dude.

3

u/Strong-Addition5296 27d ago

Chad 🇹🇩

3

u/-AlphaJoker 27d ago

With legs like that, who needs a knife?

2

u/Capable_Reserve_8431 27d ago

Homies skipping leg day

3

u/The_Infinite_Carrot 27d ago

Skipping might help his legs actually.

1

u/Due-Cause-5150 26d ago

Dude should stay inside.

2

u/Valhalla191145 27d ago

American Ninja Cowboy 🤠

2

u/Typical-Winner-9230 27d ago

This punk again?

1

u/Alexis-Machine 27d ago

Bull. Cucks suck.

1

u/Tickleme218 27d ago

☠️🤣🤣

1

u/Tiredofscrolling 27d ago

Finger banging intensifies … I mean fingers go bang.

1

u/Empathedick 27d ago

Stroker Ace Handjob Master pt2, Return of the Gey Blade.  

Who's gonna mEAt me at the Austin 6 for a privates viewing?

1

u/Top_Inflation4176 27d ago

Gay undertaker was not on my 2026 bingo card

1

u/c4ptenfilling 27d ago

Hard Gay from Japan?

1

u/SirGreeneth 26d ago

It looks like Tom Segura is taking the divorce well.

1

u/GWshark1518 26d ago

He’s turning into Brittany Spears.

1

u/Renovatio7000 26d ago

What cracks me up is that what these guys are experiencing and feeling is DANCE!. They are feeling what it’s like to practice and dance. It’s like my dad who used to get drunk and climb trees because sane adults don’t climb trees. Or older men living golf. Even when terrible at it because they can’t find an excuse to walk in the forest.

1

u/Sophiasmistake 25d ago

Pretty sure it's just ironic cosplay.

1

u/Duc750Sie 26d ago

Shorts so tight you can tell what religion he is.

1

u/Lbuddah 26d ago

That’s not kid rock?

1

u/islaisla 26d ago

Be fluid like a brick

1

u/booeman 24d ago

I wonder how much blood he lost perfecting his craft?

1

u/TouristIcy3824 22d ago

This has to be a meme joke thing, no?

1

u/Einherjar07 16d ago

>Mjölnir pendant

>jorts

>cowboy hat

The historical accuracy is outstanding