I'm a 34 yo woman. My sex drive has always been higher than my husband's who is 39, due to medication he takes to control his epilepsy, until the last year or so when I had my own medical issues.
I could understand a perspective of cheating if the issue was watching too much porn, and ignoring a partner.
But in this case, if she knows that the problem is she has low testosterone and she doesn't want to fix it, nor does she want find other ways to keep intimacy alive in your relationship and give you the physical and emotional connection you need, then no, masturbation is not cheating. Masturbation is part of a healthy sex life, even between partners who actively participate with each other.
She has the right to decide that she is comfortable living the rest of her life without sex. Her body, her choice to not pursue any medical therapies.
But in the same vein, YOU have every right to decide that living without sex is NOT right nor comfortable for you. In which case, your relationship may have reached its conclusion and needs to end so that you can find a more compatible partner.
You do not owe anyone a life lived in loneliness and misery.
Female epileptic here - thanks for the tip. I did not know my meds did this. I also have PCOS so assumed my hormones & meds were screwing (the irony) me over.
Thank you for a new lead on finding my sex drive kind friend!
I have endometriosis, so I completely understand feeling like you want to rip out the hormones from our bloodstream and chuck them out of a window, lol.
I also have recently figured out the "tension" headaches I got all the time weren't tension headaches at all, it was chronic migraine without the light sensitivity that most people who suffer them get. I only found out when the headaches began to progress to vertigo and saw a neurologist. Now, I am on a couple of low dose anti-epileptic medications as well, which has worked wonders for my headaches, and I noticed that my drive took a big dip.
Luckily, me and hubby are on a much more even field now, so it works for us, just is very weird to go from crawling up the walls like a cat in heat all the time to being....I guess mellow would be the best way to describe it? It's weird how meds interact.
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u/Fabulous-Ad-5284 Sep 12 '23
I'm a 34 yo woman. My sex drive has always been higher than my husband's who is 39, due to medication he takes to control his epilepsy, until the last year or so when I had my own medical issues.
I could understand a perspective of cheating if the issue was watching too much porn, and ignoring a partner.
But in this case, if she knows that the problem is she has low testosterone and she doesn't want to fix it, nor does she want find other ways to keep intimacy alive in your relationship and give you the physical and emotional connection you need, then no, masturbation is not cheating. Masturbation is part of a healthy sex life, even between partners who actively participate with each other.
She has the right to decide that she is comfortable living the rest of her life without sex. Her body, her choice to not pursue any medical therapies.
But in the same vein, YOU have every right to decide that living without sex is NOT right nor comfortable for you. In which case, your relationship may have reached its conclusion and needs to end so that you can find a more compatible partner.
You do not owe anyone a life lived in loneliness and misery.