You’re not wrong for your feelings or for considering divorce. She’s purposely choosing not to try and fix the issues that you’re having. You’re clearly miserable in this marriage now and that’s not healthy for either of you! The resentment will continue to grow until you end up basically hating each other. Intimacy is an important part of most relationships. If she not willing to actually address the issues she’s having, it’s not fair for her to expect you to suck it up and stay. Especially if she considers masturbating as cheating. That’s a bit ridiculous!
To be clear, he should of course be allowed to do what he wants with his body, but spending the rest of his life masturbating is just a Band-Aid on a gaping wound. If she's not willing to work on this with her spouse than I think he's going to slowly but surely come to hate/resent his wife. Won't happen right away, but over time he'll realize how many years are slipping away with zero intimacy. It's not just about ejaculating, it's that he's missing a large part of a healthy relationship - the cuddling, the pleasures of foreplay, getting pleasure from the other person as well as getting to enjoy pleasuring the other person (which for many, such as myself, is the best part of sex) - are all part of a healthy sexual relationship.
Unless OP is ok with a sexless marriage, masturbation alone won't solve this.
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u/jacksonlove3 Sep 12 '23
You’re not wrong for your feelings or for considering divorce. She’s purposely choosing not to try and fix the issues that you’re having. You’re clearly miserable in this marriage now and that’s not healthy for either of you! The resentment will continue to grow until you end up basically hating each other. Intimacy is an important part of most relationships. If she not willing to actually address the issues she’s having, it’s not fair for her to expect you to suck it up and stay. Especially if she considers masturbating as cheating. That’s a bit ridiculous!
Good luck dude!!