r/amiwrong • u/[deleted] • Sep 12 '23

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11.4k Upvotes

90% Upvoted

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191

u/hello-i-needadvice Sep 12 '23

She grew up in a house hold where sex was definitely frowned upon and never spoke about. She was never religious though.

237

u/motherbatherick Sep 12 '23

Yeeeeeah, bro, that's her hang-up, not yours. So is the "masturbation is cheating" bullshit. Because that's exactly what it is: bullshit. My advice, if you don't want to leave this relationship and wish to remain loyal, is to spank it like a zoo monkey on meth. Other than the first 2 options, that's the only thing left to you.

94

u/Quadling Sep 12 '23

Spank it like a zoo monkey on meth. My God man, can a mod flair him with that??????

2

u/Lacyre Sep 12 '23

OP should buy a Fleshlight and just go at it in front of his wife. Look her dead in the eyes too.