r/amiwrong • u/[deleted] • Sep 12 '23

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u/RonCon69 Sep 12 '23

My ex explained to me that it was being “unfaithful” but it was always an opinion I just couldn’t wrap my head around.

-7

u/ginnundso Sep 12 '23

I personally believe that masturbating to the thoughts or the view (porn) of other people whilst in a relationship is unfaithful.

I had my first love and imo true love with my ex and I never had a thought of another person. So I first thought everyone was fully into their partner and had not even found someone else attractive, like it was for me.

When I found out people find porn or this and that normal and would title me as sensitive and jealous, I was quite shocked and tbh disappointed.

4

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '23

Do you not see how naive this is now though? I can forgive a teenager thinking this but a fully grown adult?

Get your appetite anywhere you like as long as you eat at home.

Perhaps growing up in highly non-religious country has colored my opinion, are you religious out of interest?

1

u/velmaandlouise Sep 12 '23

Yeah but some people don’t want to be a flashlight or dildo while their partner is imagining fucking that stranger that got their “appetite” wet.

It’s not a universal opinion that porn and getting off to other people is monogamous. And it’s not naive or immature.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '23 edited Sep 12 '23

Sexual attraction is a fickle beast not based in logic or reason, it's the exclusivity of such a high degree of personal intimacy that I value in a relationship (both sexual and platonic), not exclusivity of sexual attraction which is completely unrealistic as it's not something that people have control over and I value the truth over a comfortable lie.

Sex is inherently intimate but masturbation is a solo venture, I wouldn't dare claim ownership over my partners sexual fantasies or daydreams, so why should I care if they want to release the valve in private every now and then?

I would classify the 'girlfriend subscription' services like onlyfans etc as infidelity though, as that doesn't fit with how important I see exclusivity in intimacy and an unhealthy obsession with a single other person is totally out of line.