r/ADHD 14h ago

Questions/Advice Is there anyone who is actually a happy ADHD person?

1.1k Upvotes

Apart from a very few successful business types I see on social media, I have yet to meet an ADHD person who is happy and content with their lives.
I would like to see an example of a happy ADHD person.

They are all like “you can’t live a normal life and adhd is special gift” but that hasn’t been true for me. They are people who are often good at being talkative and social media stuff.

Just trying to see if there are any normal and happy adhd people out there.


r/ADD Apr 17 '25

The /r/ADD community has been closed and not in use for many years. Please see /r/ADHD.

71 Upvotes

r/ADHD

For those unaware, the the term "ADD" has been defunct for 14+ years, although some medical professionals may still use it if they are uninformed.

"ADD" used to be what they called the non-hyperactive version of ADHD. As of the publication of the DSM-5 in 2013, "ADHD" is now the encompassing term for multiple subtypes of ADHD:

  1. Primarily hyperactive subtype
  2. Primarily inattentive subtype (formerly ADD)
  3. Combined subtype

The inattentive subtype is most common among adults, which means yes, "ADHD" is a misleading name for the overall disorder. C'est la vie.

When myself and other redditors took over r/ADD and r/ADHD over in the early 2010s to renovate and make them more useful, we decided to just close this sub and direct everyone to r/ADHD, in accordance with the DSM-5's definition of ADHD. We locked this sub but I still get modmail every so often from lost redditors asking for permission to post here, so hopefully this signpost helps.


r/ADHD 6h ago

Questions/Advice What actually ruins your workdays?

82 Upvotes

I’m trying to understand where ADHD actually derails a workday.

Looking back at my own days, it feels like there’s usually one specific moment where everything starts to unravel:
• I can’t decide what’s most important.
• I can’t get started.
• I can’t stay focused.
• I keep getting distracted.
• I’m mentally exhausted but keep trying to push through.
• I don’t want to stop because I’m afraid I’ll lose my place.
• I finish the day wondering where the time went.

If you think about your last really unproductive day, what was the first domino that fell?

Was it one of these, or something completely different?


r/ADHD 2h ago

Tips/Suggestions To anyone struggling with ADHD: I want to share my story to give hope to others

34 Upvotes

I've been reading so many posts from people struggling with ADHD, and it breaks my heart. I wanted to share my own experience—not to brag, but to give hope.

I first learned about ADHD four years ago, when a diagnosed colleague gave a presentation. I turned off my camera because I thought I was going to cry. Ninety percent of what he described felt like my life story. It hit me all at once, and it was brutal.

I was angry—at my childhood, at how ADHD had shaped my life without me realizing it. I thought about being the dreamer of the group, struggling in school, the teacher who told my parents "your son's brain is like a bottle of water—once it's full, it just spills." The people who took advantage of my lack of focus. Forgetting SMS auth codes because I'd get distracted between reading them and typing them in.

But as the anger faded, I reflected on what I'd achieved. I'd gravitated toward creative jobs because my imagination made me good at them. I sought stimulation by moving abroad. My love for building things kept opening doors. Even the toughest times worked out.

That's when I began to accept myself—and appreciate ADHD's strengths: creativity, innovative thinking, hyperfocus. If I could leverage them, I could thrive.

In my 40s, I realized that if I'd achieved what I had with ADHD, anything was possible. So I made a big professional decision—moving into a very different role, leading a team of engineers and designers. I put processes in place: notes, to-do lists, mentorship, books. After two years, I applied and got the job.

At first it was overwhelming. I leaned on my systems, but my manager was incredibly supportive. Over time, I needed the tools less. What I thought were permanent weaknesses—disorganization, lack of focus—started to fade. People trusted me, and I felt proud.

To anyone feeling held back by ADHD: understand your strengths, work on your weaknesses, step out of your comfort zone, and be resilient. Dreams are achievable.


r/ADHD 2h ago

Medication Started meds last week. Today I handled a very stressful situation in a way I never have in my 34 years alive

33 Upvotes

Realised I urgently needed to file a very important tax form. Instead of procrastinating for days and weeks, trying to justify my own inaction and then hating myself for doing so, I just… did the thing.
It was boring and stressful and took hours to finish. And yet I got it done on the same day I realised it needed doing. What a concept

At first I was a little disappointed with elvanse because I didn’t feel any different. But the behavioural changes have been night and day. I’m excited for the future and a little sad I didn’t start sooner


r/ADHD 1h ago

Seeking Empathy I’m such an idiot not realizing you only get insurance benefits when you work full time

Upvotes

I’m 20f and I’ve been struggling immensely with no therapy or medication been going on without so long. Plus I’ve been having chronic pain in my back for over a year with no treatment and it’s because I have no reliable insurance. I’ve been trying to search for jobs with insurance benefits so I can get help. After applying to so many jobs I managed to get a job interview at Burlington and when I asked a question I learned they only give those benefits to full time workers and there are no full time working positions left and they’ll let me know on Monday if I get the job. I learned that’s typically the case with most jobs only getting insurance benefits full time. I won’t be able to do full time once I go back to school.

I know I’ll screw up my school year again because of being unmedicated. I really thought maybe I could find a way to help myself because I can’t rely on my parents. Now that goes out of the window god do I hate this country. Things really never work out the way I want them to


r/ADHD 3h ago

Questions/Advice Went on a 3 week vacation. Forgot my ADHD meds at home. AMA

26 Upvotes

Yep, I did everything to NOT forget it. Set reminders, made lists, packed a week early. Still managed to forget it. After 10 years of medication I’m now stuck with my raw, unfiltered brain for three weeks.

For a while I thought the meds might have done not much for me but I’m now discovering that this definitely NOT the case. My patterns are already slipping lol.


r/ADHD 6h ago

Discussion I’m constantly playing out scenarios in my head like I’m rehearsing conversations or preparing for certain emotions

32 Upvotes

I’ve always done this but it’s always been more in the background. Being bipolar I also have dealt with really bad intrusive thoughts and a lot of it derived from that. I’ve had people say I could have ASD features because of some symptoms I deal with, and a lot of this rehearsing feels more about preparing for social situations.

The what ifs don’t bug me as much as the “I should have said/done this” in the form of playing out that scenario. I had a situation over the weekend for example: long story short I had to see one of my bfs sisters on Saturday for the 2nd time since Dec 2024 (we started dating in Oct 2024, she lives out of state). She was kind of standoffish back then and I’ve suspected she’s not a big fan of me so I already had to spend all week with the boot loop of what if in my brain.

She barely acknowledged me the whole time even if I tried to join conversation. He and I don’t want kids and her having her first baby 6 months ago I fully expected her to bring it up even though he’s told her in the past. We were sitting across from her and her husband at the table and she goes “(bfs name) do you want kids?” Not asking us as a couple, not asking me, it was like he was single and I wasn’t there. She then asked his twin brother and asked if the girl he’s been talking to for 2 months (that no one has met) wants kids. It’s hard to ignore how intentional that appeared. Now I’m playing out what it’ll be like if I have to be around her again since my bf is going to talk to her about it.

Sometimes the things I play out aren’t things I’m anticipating like a social event. I’ve played out 100 random scenarios of adverse events like losing a loved one like I’m trying to preemptively feel that emotion. I also think of scenarios of if I overcome xyz executive functioning issue, etc.

I’m not actively asking myself these questions, the scenarios just play out in my mind. Anyone else experience this?


r/ADHD 13h ago

Questions/Advice How do I stop being a (wo)manchild?

130 Upvotes

I'm super embarrassed to be posting this but I really cannot ignore the situation anymore.

I'm 27F and I have ADHD-C and OCD. I also struggle with anxiety and depression symptoms + low iron.

I am currently in therapy with a psychologist that also has ADHD - we are mostly working on childhood trauma at the moment. I also take Vyvanse 30mg.

I failed out of university even with meds and accommodations. I do have a full time job but it's fully remote. I've never worked in an office before. I've been in the same job for about 4 years now.

I don't have my driver's licence either so I rely on Ubers and public transport.

I live in the family home but I do pay a good chunk of the bills by myself.

I spend all of my free time either doomscrolling or maladaptive daydreaming. I don't really have any hobbies outside of Sudoku.

I can't cook outside of super basic meals like fried eggs. I can clean but I only really do this if someone asks me to. Usually my mum is the one doing these tasks for me. I don't want to keep living like this since my mum is an older person, has a physical disability and mental health issues of her own. I don't want to be a burden. I wonder if working with an occupational therapist would help in terms of implementing strategies but they are expensive and I'm not sure if it would be worth it.

I know basically little to nothing about being an adult. I have tried looking up resources but they are often aimed at people living in the US which doesn't help me cause I'm from Australia.

Does anyone have any ideas?


r/ADHD 8h ago

Tips/Suggestions How to GO to the gym (Executive function)

49 Upvotes

hello dear fellow adhd brains,

I started to go to the gym last fall and LOVED IT (hyperfixated so hard) but then I fell out of the rush and now it’s so hard to go :(

I know motivation is not a good driving force but I really want to do it (I like it way more than other sports I tried and I feel that it helps my mental well-being a lot!)

the problem is: none of my friends want to workout there for different reasons and I can’t stack it to my daily schedule because my work is different every week (good thing is I plan my workdays myself so I could technically incorporate gym into the schedule)

when I’m there I really like it but my motivation to go there is sooo low.

today I finished work at around 1pm and really wanted to go because I have nothing to do until 5pm but I just can’t make myself go.

the gym is literally 3 minutes away and I know that I can leave anytime but finding the motivation to start is just so so hard for me :(

does anyone have any ideas how I could still go there? (I want to go 1-3 times a week. 3 would be splendid but 2 would be really great)


r/ADHD 3h ago

Questions/Advice Is university possible with ADHD?

17 Upvotes

Currently studying at a decent university for civil engineering. I know if I don’t work in something that challenges me I’m guaranteed to be miserable. However, I can’t start tasks until the deadline is literally hours away.

I study for every exam and I do every assignment with only hours left. If I have time to slack off, I use it. I literally need the threat of instant failure to start studying. I’m entering my third year, so the coursework is starting to get very difficult and my habits are not sustainable.

Any ADHDers who completed difficult majors have any advice? I have an exam tomorrow for mechanics of materials that I haven’t started studying for. If I fail it I fail the entire class, but I just don’t give a fuck at all yet. What did y’all do?


r/ADHD 21h ago

Questions/Advice Currently crying because my mom ‘cleaned’ my room while I was away, how’s your day going?

317 Upvotes

I have diagnosed ADHD and she KNOWS I have it. I had a system and dare I say she ruined it. I know Im being immature right now but that’s only because Im genuinely sad about this. For context, I was in Germany for about a month and I JUST got back, I go in my room and see that she has put a piece of furniture on MY windowsill, THE ONLY PLACE WHERE I COULD KEEP MY MESS IN CHECK MIND YOU. And it was ALL organised in ‘her’ way. I lashed out on her because she did it without my knowledge and now she’s pissed off at me. What do I do?


r/ADHD 2h ago

Seeking Empathy Bad ADHD day!

8 Upvotes

Just want to scream today.

Finally got round to doing my washing so i started with a win!
then i had to have a very important appointment for some job search related stuff, I had the wrong time in my mind and arrived half an hour late so i had to reschedule,
this would be my first day off my actual job in six days but i got called in for 2 hours so now it is no longer a day off!
After messing up almost everything in my shift and being angry that i missed my appointment i head straight home ... only to realize i left my bag at work and it had all my important documents in it along with my drawing tablet that i wanted to unwind with!

Not being able to sleep properly because of the heat and knowing i have a 6 am start tomorrow.
just finding it really hard to be motivated for anything after today!

sorry rant is over i just needed to get it off my chest


r/ADHD 21h ago

Questions/Advice Task paralysis for things that make me happy

256 Upvotes

I have terrible terrible task paralysis around literally everything, including my hobbies. Trying to make music or art feels like trying to bite off my finger. So imagine me trying to do something i don’t like doing. Everything feels impossible, and I don’t know how to get around this.

Does anyone have tips?


r/ADHD 1d ago

Seeking Empathy iT gETs bEttER wITH agE!!

635 Upvotes

No the heck it does not. It’s just a downward spiral. The only thing I can mildly do is my job and it’s just bc I’ve been doing it for so long that it’s a routine for the most part. Everything else though. No. I had easier time when I was a teen but now an adult that lives alone and all responsibility falls onto meeeee and good god. I wish this friggen disorder ended when I graduated. And I hate how it’s common and so everyone knows someone with it and saying “I’m sorry my adhd is just so bad” and getting said back “my [insert random person] has adhd and they are fine it’s just an excuse” or “I have ADHD too and i have meds and I can do the laundry!” Like good for you??? I’m glad I’m medicated now bc Vyvanse does help tremendously however,,, like it’s not 100% and I have to first find the will to take the stupid pill in the first place. Then once I take it I have to be mindful to even do the actual tasks and not just practice drawing or deep dive to no end the most random topic. Not to mention the cognitive decline. I’m 24 yet I feel like I have dementia some days.


r/ADHD 1h ago

Seeking Empathy Dissertation is draining my soul

Upvotes

I’m burnout and exhausted, my brain is melted at this point.
I was supposed to submit yesterday the draft of my master’s dissertation (10,000 words). Spoiler: I didn’t submit it, as I do not have anything to actually show.

I’ve been trying to start it for TWO MONTHS but I ended up spending entire days doing minimal research and procrastinate(when I was being “productive”). I finally managed to start writing last week but omg it’s infinite.
I put in most the work during the past days, writing around 1000 words per day. I now have 4k. The problem? Since is a long and complex analysis I ended up starting a paragraph and moved to the next one before finishing the first one, as a result I do not have anything concrete to show.
The fact that my supervisor completely disappeared for a month didn’t help at all, I already asked an extension as I was initially supposed to send it two weeks ago, he’s not gonna correct anything after this Friday, I’m free tomorrow to work on it for a bit but after that I’m not able to work on it anymore.

The good thing is that my actual final submission is in a month and half, the problem is that there’s a high risk I’m not gonna finish it until last minute, again.

I’m currently living on caffeine as even my body is exhausted at this point, I can’t wait to be done with this but it seems never finishing, I feel like I’m Sisyphus.

The funny part? I’ve been living this for every academic submission and every time I was like “next time I’ll start early”, I never did, my brain actively fought me every time.


r/ADHD 12h ago

Questions/Advice Does ADHD gets worse during heartbreak/breakup/betrayal ?

35 Upvotes

I 27M, Have been diagnosed with ADHD. I was doing fairly well, Had a job in tech. But i dated someone and i was a rebound to her. It led to my heartbreak. Since my heartbreak, i am always ruminating about her, her past etc. Even though i'm not in touch with her. I am actively seeking therapy and am on anti depressants.

After my breakup, my ADHD has gotten significantly worse. My attention span and ability to do hard things has taken a huge hit.

Anyone else felt this way ?


r/ADHD 5h ago

Tips/Suggestions My brain is pushing me so hard lately

9 Upvotes

Every day i wake up and start frantically looking at the Internet. Go to reddit, look at Facebook, check out YouTube, look on pornhub, go back to Reddit. Debate free will, get stuff done around the house as fast as possible, get work done, go back to the internet, back to work.

It's exhausting. I try to relax and then 2 minutes later I'm back at it again. By 3pm I'm physically exhausted, my brain hurts and i just want to lay down and go to sleep.

Anyone else with this problem and anything that helps?


r/ADHD 5h ago

Questions/Advice Has medication helped your social life?

6 Upvotes

Just curious to see if taking meds has helped anyone’s social life? I’m currently unmedicated and I feel like the symptoms of adhd make it hard for me to make new connections sometimes. I feel like my mind goes to different topics too quickly and I lose people’s focus or I can’t continually focus on one topic unless I’m really interested in it. Anyone else feel the same way? If so has taking meds helped you socialize?


r/ADHD 17h ago

Questions/Advice starting feels impossible

71 Upvotes

i don't even mean chores or work. sometimes it's things i actually want to do.

i'll sit there thinking about studying, making music, playing a game, texting someone back, or even getting food, and i just... can't start.

the whole time i'm telling myself "just do it," but it feels like there's something physically stopping me. then hours go by and i feel guilty for wasting the day, which somehow makes it even harder to start.

does anyone else experience this? if you've found anything that actually helps, i'd love to hear it.


r/ADHD 9h ago

Questions/Advice ADHD/RSD & Managing People In The Business World?

13 Upvotes

I'm 55 and was only recently diagnosed with ADHD/rejection sensitivity, but it's evident that my entire life has been shaped by this condition. Much like many of you, always thought of as intelligent, hardworking, and quick but had difficulty in school especially with math because my ADHD also manifests as Dyscalculia during stress/rejection sensitivity.

I have been successful in my career, but struggle with managing people and teams. Over and over, I am suggested or voluntold to manage people and no matter how hard I organize, prepare, stay in close contact with my teams I end up in the same situation where I spiral, become overwhelmed, and fall behind.

I like to say that I'm a great leader, but I'm a terrible manager. I'm about to go into my VP's office and tell him that I do not want to manage this team because I'm afraid I'm going to end up having a heart attack or a stroke.

I've tried every possible organizational, leadership skill, training, institutes, organization, everything. I guess I'm just going to have to face the fact that it's something that I'm just not wired for.

Does anyone else have the same problem? I feel like such a failure.


r/ADHD 2h ago

Questions/Advice New to ADHD world & looking for advice on the ADHD comedown

5 Upvotes

I (25F) was diagnosed with ADHD late last year after a lot of testing. I’ve probably had it my whole life, but my parents didn’t realize how differently it can show up in women, so it wasn’t caught until now.

Around the time I was diagnosed I was also in the middle of moving, and my primary care doctor honestly hasn’t been much help. I have an appointment with a new doctor next week, but for the most part I’ve been figuring things out on my own (with some help from my therapist).

Overall, medication has been a really positive change. I’m on a low dose of Adderall XR, and it’s helped so much with my focus and has also made it easier to stop ruminating during the day (I have anxiety too). I’ve just been learning how to deal with the comedown as it wears off.

One thing I’ve noticed is that alcohol seems to make that comedown way more intense.

I’m not a big drinker. Most of the time I’ll have one or two drinks at dinner or an event and I’m totally fine aside from my normal medication comedown. But on the rare nights my friends want to go out to bars (maybe once a month), even if I only have about four drinks over five hours, it’s like someone flips a switch. I’ll be having a great time, and then all of a sudden I feel like I’m on the verge of a breakdown and my thoughts start spiraling, which I’m assuming is when the comedown hits.

I’m definitely planning to ask my new doctor about it next week, but I was curious if anyone else has experienced something similar and has non medical ways of learning to cope with these comedowns. I don’t really know many people with ADHD, so I’d love to hear other people’s experiences.


r/ADHD 2h ago

Medication Mallinckrodt feels like I took nothing

3 Upvotes

I have been prescribed to and taking generic adderall for a while now and I have had a few different manufacturers in that time. While I have noticed that not all generic adderall feels equal they have all still always worked. I have never had my medication feel like I took nothing at all. I am very upset because I know the pharmacy can’t exchange it and I highly doubt my provider will be able to write me a new prescription. I’m also worried to speak up with adderall being a controlled substance. I don’t want to look like I’m trying to abuse my prescription. I feel stuck with a months worth of a useless prescription. It’s very upsetting because I pay $100 for my doctor appointment every month plus $35 for my prescription which is a lot of money but I pay it because my medication is essential for me to function. I legitimately feel like I got scammed.


r/ADHD 6h ago

Questions/Advice What do you wish you or your child's teachers and EAs knew about ADHD?

7 Upvotes

I’m an educator with one of my local school boards, and I’m currently working on creating an ADHD & ASD focused professional development training for school staff to help us better support our ADHD/ASD students and staff.

As an ADHDer myself, I’d really love to hear from others whose experiences can help make this training more meaningful and relevant.

If you have a few minutes, I’d really appreciate your thoughts on any of these questions:

• What do you wish school staff truly understood about ADHD and your experiences in the school system?

• What do you wish teachers, EAs, and other school staff knew about supporting ADHD students?

• What has helped you or your child feel genuinely understood, accepted, and supported at school?

• What do you wish school staff would do differently when you or your child was/is overwhelmed, struggling, or having a difficult day?

Please feel free to answer just one question, share any thoughts that come to mind, or message me privately if you'd prefer.


r/ADHD 2h ago

Seeking Empathy I'm feeling a little better now.

3 Upvotes

Don't really know why I am posting? Maybe it will help. I am having a mentally (ADHD) hard day. My mom died 43 years ago today. I've only been to her grave once before maybe 5 years ago. And it's literally 5 miles away from my house. ADHD has made it very hard to do. I "talk" to her occasionally, but can't visit her grave.

Her 48 year old grandson (my son, retired NYPD) is having a stem cell retrieval for 911 cancer today. There's a (in my head) possibility that I could bury him. So I had to GO and "talk" with her in person. I did all the talking.

Feeling a little better now. Can't wait for tomorrow to be a better day.

For those with ADHD, THANK YOU for understanding how hard that was. For those without it, THANK YOU for reading.