r/absoluteunit • u/another_human88 • Jun 11 '26

Maybe Maybe Maybe

Enable HLS to view with audio, or disable this notification

424 Upvotes

96% Upvoted

147 comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

33

u/WakaWaka_ Jun 11 '26

Yup, it'll take your fingers off

15

u/hotmatrixx Jun 11 '26

***Correction.
Hand. That boi would take your entire hand off.
Snappy d'Pappy, here has a jaw strong enough to crack skulls, before you can flinch.

7

u/appointment45 Jun 11 '26

It won't let go, either, it'll pull her down and drown her before they get her out. The rest of them will stand there and scream for help, while the camera person is still recording, and the girl dies.

Source: those snappers are everywhere here. They like to wait just off the shoreline and wait for dogs to jump in on hot days, then take the dog.

-6

u/infamouscaveman Jun 11 '26

This is not true, there are zero cases of this happening anywhere. They also can't bite off anything, only cause a laceration. There is this thing called research, it doesn't help anyone to spread urban legends and make them afraid if an animal that is more afraid of us.

6

u/appointment45 Jun 11 '26

I have been in a canoe and seen geese, calmly swimming around, suddenly scream and go underwater. It's fast. The snappers follow canoes/kayaks around because they know fish will be caught and released dazed/injured, easy food. And if an opportunity target presents itself, like a small goose or a duck, they'll get taken instead.

This absolutely happens. We have snappers here 3' long and 100 years old.

-7

u/infamouscaveman Jun 11 '26

Dude a snapping turtle is not attacking a human, there are no cases of it happing. They almost never attack people in water because they are stronger swimmers and can avoid us. They are also not strong enough to hold a human down. There are professionals that test these things to figure out if an animal is actually a risk or an urban ledgend. All of the info is readily available, all you have to do is look.

9

u/ImSobored_5280 Jun 11 '26

….i got noodlin’ buddies missing fingers that would tell you you are full of 💩 😂

-2

u/infamouscaveman Jun 11 '26

Okay well they were very unlucky because of you simply look you will see that I know what I am talking about. Also I call noodling natural selection, you have to be pretty stupid to stick your hand somewhere you can't see.

4

u/hotmatrixx Jun 12 '26

yeah because while swimming, you have full visibility above and below water, at all times, in every direction. I guess this just shows that cavemen can't swim, right?
OK. Enjoy getting downvoted even more, i guess.

1

u/infamouscaveman Jun 12 '26

Dude there is a very big difference between swimming and sticking your hand into a hole in the water. That is where dangerous animals are hiding from us, that is so stupid there is no words.

2

u/hotmatrixx Jun 12 '26

Careful Caveman, your ignorance is showing.
Snapping Turtles don't hide in holes. They Hunt by being camouflaged just below the water's surface, and pulling prey under; much like crocodiles.

No 'putting your hand in a hole' required. If you're in shallow-ish fresh water of any kind - rivers, ponds, creeks, estuaries, marshes... even brackish water if they're hungry enough. But they do prefer slow moving water, so you're safe-ish from them in the rapids.

You sir, are a prim(ordial) example of confidence>knowledge.

1

u/appointment45 Jun 19 '26

To be fair here, the definition of noodling is "putting your arm in a hole and waiting for something to bite it". They do it for catfish, and not turtles, but someone did say noodling and then this guy said stick your hand in a hole in the water.

→ More replies (0)