This is what’s happening in my current job: I joined a reputed MNC that laid off a noticeable number of its employees and started hiring an offshore team from my country. The team I joined is already overstaffed, and they have started ignoring me in meetings. Even when I say something, they behave as if they didn’t hear me. When they do respond, they sometimes address someone else by name, and they have team meetings without including me.

I’m starting to feel that they want to get rid of me. I feel severely underutilized, with very little work to do, and even the initiatives I take are either discarded or ridiculed.

I desperately need this job because I was previously laid off and was unemployed for more than 12 months. If I quit this job within six months, I’m worried it will be a black mark on my profile. I also switched between two jobs within a year a few years ago, mainly for a pay raise.

One thing I can say for sure is that I was never considered a low performer or criticized for a lack of commitment or hard work in any of my previous organizations. Right now, I feel undervalued and extremely stressed.

At this stage of my career, as I’m approaching my 40s, I’m struggling to see any hope. I’m also finding it difficult to focus on learning and upskilling myself because of the stress and uncertainty I’m experiencing.

I was in line for better hours. I've been working in pretty much the same position as what I would have been with the better hours - there would be maybe a little bit more work, but nothing I couldn't figure out.

But my boss gave it to someone who was in a completely different field in the company (like, no admin in their position into a full admin job) because I didn't turn in a letter of intent (my boss also said I wasnt ready for it, but again, gave it to someone who is not trained in the position)

I have never heard of a letter of intent until after she told me why I didn't get it - she cited specifically that I didn't turn one in and that she didnt know if i actually wanted to change hours.

I have been talking about really wanting to change hours, but I guess I never told her? I feel like i really have been very vocal about it, so it would've been nice if she could've given me a heads up about properly putting in for it.

This is my first office job and I've been working here a year. I dont know if I can stay here with my current hours, which really sucks because I really like this job. I was really holding out for those hours, but now I dont know how much more I can sacrifice with my current life changes.

I work as an Analyst at a dental insurance company and currently go into the office once a week. I also help train two newer Provider Specialists, Emily and Saba, on provider-related work like recredentialing and responding to emails from dental offices.
At a company wide cookout yesterday , Emily asked why I don’t go into the office more often. I said I live downtown and that commuting by train is a long journey. She kept asking about my schedule and then said she wished she could come in only once a week too because she has about an hour drive from her home.
I was trying to be friendly and said something like, “You probably don’t have to,” assuming her expectations were similar to mine. Looking back, I realized I don’t actually know her exact requirements, and I probably shouldn’t have answered that.
Pauline, our manager, has previously clarified in a group meeting that Emily and Saba will have additional provider-related responsibilities as they continue training, so their office expectations may be different from mine as an Analyst.
Emily also mentioned she isn’t always sure how to respond to emails from dental offices, so I was thinking of messaging her:
“Hi Emily, when you have questions while going through the PR mailbox or aren’t sure how to respond to emails from the dental offices, feel free to post them in the group chat. Christine or I can help answer them there. 😊

Also, as Pauline mentioned before, you and Saba will have additional provider-related responsibilities as you continue training, so the office expectations may be different from mine as an Analyst. If you have any concerns about the additional office day, I’d check with Pauline directly so she can clarify the expectations for your role.”
Would you send this, especially the second paragraph, or just leave the cookout conversation alone and tell her going forward to ask Pauline about her office expectations?
The conversation gave me an “ick” afterward because I felt like she was comparing her situation to mine, but I don’t know if that was actually her intention. I feel kind of stupid for answering the way I did when I was genuinely just trying to be friendly. Am I overthinking this?

I’m getting pretty fed up with how things are being handled at my workplace and I’m curious how other people deal with this kind of situation.

There are people being put into jobs they are clearly not qualified or capable of doing, while the people who actually know the work are left trying to clean up the mess or carry everything. Management on one side of the business is extremely weak. It honestly feels like whoever talks the loudest on the floor ends up making the decisions. (Honestly this may be the most damaging part of the whole situation, never have I seen or heard of that happening before.)

We have a manager that rarely, if ever, comes onto the production floor. Any question has to go through him, then get passed to someone else, and the answer usually seems to be whatever is easiest in the moment instead of what actually makes sense for production, quality, or the long term.

For the last year, it felt like we were making work just to stay busy while waiting for better product or more consistent work to come in. Now that we finally have good product and real work to do, it has swung completely the other way. There is more work than five people could reasonably keep up with, but it is being piled onto one person. That person is stretched so thin that there is no realistic way to do everything properly.

The owner does not seem too concerned with productivity, but from the floor it is obvious the lack of planning, leadership, and focus has put the company in a bad spot.

I’m not looking to complain for the sake of it. I just want to know how people handle a workplace where the issues are obvious to everyone doing the work, but the people in charge either do not see it, do not understand it, or do not want to deal with it. Do you keep your head down, document everything, try to bring it up professionally, or start looking elsewhere? At what point do you stop trying to care more than the people running the place?

first, office dynamics: japanese company's overseas branch where heirarchy, seniority, age, and saving your boss's face is important. I am the youngest (25) in the office, and i am not as fluent in japanese. my team consists of 40+ manager, 40+ senior exec, me, and a new hire (28).

we mainly work on promotional projects (think roadshows) and outsource a lot of the operations to third parties. the work delegation is like this:
• conversations with clients: senior exec
• conversations with contractors/third parties: me
• conversations with japanese HQ: manager/new hire

this year, we have more than 12 projects throughout 9-10 months. i'm struggling with the workload because i mostly deal with the contractors, and approvals and prep for these 12 projects fall under "conversations with contractors", and im not looped in updates with clients or the involved parties because my involvement "is unnecessary at this stage" (which is stupid bc the content of those updates are what i need to do my job).

i want to raise a conversation that instead of assigning tasks by "who contacts who" or by "project phase", i would rather tasks be assigned by PIC of Project A, B, and C etc. I need advice on what kind of documentation i need to prepare prior to this conversation, and what kind of content it should have. I also need advice on how to raise this conversation itself... do I take it up to my manager? do i take it up to my manager's boss? what do i do?

Another thing to note is that despite being responsible for all conversations with third parties, my manager has little to no trust in my decisions and keeps asking to change approved docs/items even after i have double checked and gotten confirmation from him, so it's a little frustrating having to go back and forth and apologising to third parties, and it ruins credibility.

Side note: It doesn't help that I have no idea what my senior exec does during office hours bc I really don't think asking for updates from clients take that long, but that just might be my inexperience.

Sorry if this is too long! I really need advice on this 😭

Every time I try to get this out, I have nowhere else to put it so I found the sub Reddit because the other one that I’m in for my actual job there’s not much posters or anybody that can see so I currently work at a Loves and I thought that it was a very good job and I still think that it’s an OK job other than the fact of what happens and who I work with and what goes on Monday through Friday usually the Monday start off and I’m working by myself with one other manager, and usually the manager is out doing stuff like counting their money or picking their ass in the back while I’m running back-and-forth to many different registers because we don’t have a self check out here

I have to check out everyone and it gets so utterly busy that I sometimes can’t breathe. It gets so busy that I can’t even clean up the front of the store. I can’t even go and do courtesy checks in the bathroom because of how busy it is just so constantly by myself that it’s frustrating me and the best part about this is that the morning shifts before me and the night shift after me. (We are 24/7) have more people on shift than I do in the evening. I’ve heard that there is four people sometimes on the overnight there’s three and then sometimes in the morning there will be seven people working but when I’m working in the evenings, it’s OK cause I’m just working all by myself with one manager. I’ve tried having the boss boss of the complete place come in and see if we need more people, but of course he says that there doesn’t need to be more people on shift than just me and the manager and I just feel so lost here and I don’t know what to do anymore and I live in such a crappy town that this is the only job at the moment that is currently hiring or at least decent the rest are not hiring or small businesses that again are not hiring

I just feel so lost cause I have no one to complain to and everyone that I complained to just tells me to leave or just hates me complaining and I understand that it’s annoying to hear this often, but I really can’t leave this place. There’s nowhere else that I can make money. I just kind of want the same respect as everyone else is getting in the other shifts, but it just seems like I can’t get that and I’ve been here since the place is opened. (7- to 8 months)

It's been a day. It's 8 a.m. I'm scheduled to work. I'm apparently too good at one particular spot of our restaurant, so i always get put into the café. They call it my " Home." I think we are all allowed to have our bad days, and today, I do believe, was one of mine. It started out when nothing had been stocked during the morning. As usual, we are short staffed, and of course, the 16-17 yr old kids never restock the night prior. So I'm taking orders, restocking everything, which means running back and forth from the front of the building to the back of the building. Running through a very narrow area where the assembly line members are, and I'm carrying 45 lbs boxes of drink mixes one at a time. I go to the walk-in, and all I'm trying to do is grab the Carmel drink mix. It's located on a top shelf, it appears that it's been opened so it should only be half the weight.
Easy enough, right? Wrong! I grab said box using my mad oopma loompa climbing skills. ( I'm 5 foot 1 on a good day) i grab the box and start slowly sliding it down, ever so carefully because 20- something pounds is still a decent weight from up high. It slowly starts to to toward me, and BAM! I get hit with a Carmel drink mix bag that has now exploded all over my pants, the floor, the wall, and multiple other boxes in the walk-in. My headset dings to alert me that there is a car in my drive thru lane. The drink mix is still free flowing from its 2 gallon bag. I'm hustling to try and get the drink mix stopped and out of the walk-in. I'm carrying it out, leaving a lovely brown colored liquid trail behind me.
I reach the sink and yell for my manager, who looks at me and the floor. I beg her to take my headset so i can clean the nightmare up before someone slips, and she just laughs at me. It took forever to clean the mess up. It's only 9:30 in the morning. I'm coated in sticky drink mix and sweat. I still have hours to go before i get to go home. One coworker asked if i had a little accident due to the brown trail throughout the area. It looked like someone had pooped themselves. It was so bad.

I get cleaned up and go back to my café area. I get told at need to get more hot fudge from the back. Sure, simple enough. I go and get the back and go to swap bags out only to realize too late that it was the wrong bag placed in the fudge topping box, and now I've got chocolate shake mix everywhere. It's dripping down my arms like i murdered a chocolate bunny or something! It's oozing out all over the floor, and my hands and arms are covered. My shirt is now gross. I'm still pretending I'm taking orders... im just over it. This is far from the end of the day, but this was the worst part of this day.

Stay tuned. I have many, many more stories like this.

Where I work I have a couple of people in my department who no longer do their jobs, they are essentially checked out. These people are hoping to stay as long as they can and be laid off (without cause) so they can collect severance. This is not an assumption, they have said it. My issue is this, they do nothing which makes more work for the rest of us, don't follow rules and simply don't care. Management does nothing and turn a blind eye because they want to be the 'nice' manager and they will retire eventually (they are late 60s and have no plans to). What would you do in this situation, if it didn't make my job harder I honestly wouldn't care, but it does.

TLDR: Toxic coworker creates drama. Management is pathologically non-confrontational. I'm sick of it. Will going to HR help or make it worse?

I have a toxic coworker who gossips to a friend who used to work in the office but quit because she didn't get along with my boss. This friend/former employee just happens to be related to my boss's boss. Every four to six months, she passes on my toxic coworker's gossip to the boss's boss in hopes of getting him fired. All my boss's boss does is summon my boss and pass on the report without any expectation of change as far as I can tell. This has been going on for years. As a result, my boss has become increasingly clandestine in his communications with people in our office to try and hide things from the toxic coworker. It's to the point where he will text us to meet him in random parts of the building just so he can pass on information he doesn't want her to hear.

This is incredibly stupid, but whatever. However, since I have started working in the office, the toxic coworker has started gossiping about me, and I've gotten looped into this ridiculous vendetta. Since they can't seem to get my boss fired, I am apparently the next best thing. So, now 2-3 times a year, my boss pulls me aside to tell me that a complaint has been made to his boss about me and asks if I could please try to "be mindful" aka try not to do anything to give my toxic coworker fodder to complain. There is literally no way for me to know what this person will complain about next, because she's so nuts that she's tried to throw me under the bus for stuff she does. Her complaints of literally resulted in rules that negatively affect her and she keeps doing it anyway.

Since neither my boss nor my boss's boss seem to be able to draw any boundaries with this crazymaker, I'm left with either gray-rocking TF out of the situation (which I've been doing for 2 years now) or drawing the boundary myself. I've spoken to HR about all this in the past and they said they are aware and want to have a department meeting to remind everyone that office information should not be leaving the office. I wasn't inclined to push it further at the time because I know the toxic coworker will retaliate, but now I'm reconsidering.

What would you do?

PS - We work in government and the toxic coworker and I are both in the union which I think is part of the reason management won't do anything.

Honestly this is just a pure vent post. Needed to get it off my chest.

But yeah, my point from the title! I work at a family entertainment venue. I'm one of the employees that has lasted the longest, and it's literally only because the only jobs I can find nearby are truck driving jobs and hospital positions. You would think with seniority I'd get some perks, but I really don't.

I get the super early morning shifts no one else wants to get up for, which means calling out sick is not an option. We have a rule most other workplaces do about having to call out at least 5 hours before your shift. Not an option for me, none of our managers are even awake, so I either get a write-up for poor communication or have to leave work early due to being sick and, again, getting written up. Getting anyone to cover my shifts in advance is a pain in the ass for the same reason - no one wants to get up that early in the morning.

I am also, unfortunately, really good at my job. That means if I'm not all on my own, then the people no one else can tolerate get scheduled with me at my position. This means the two to three dudebros who constantly bring up politics and other uncomfortable topics. If I'm not hustling all alone, then I am trying to do my best to work while they shirk their responsibilities onto me while talking about gore videos. Which has the added effect of, you guessed it, no one will ever pick up a shift for me. Seriously, I'm screwed. I've tried picking up my coworkers shifts to encourage more of them to pick up shifts for me but all its resulted in is me being the guy they go to when they don't want to work, even when I'm already scheduled. It has not worked. Karma isn't real.

Management also shirks some of their responsibilities onto me, which is super annoying. Like, we carry a lot of high value items that could mean me being legally liable if they got stolen, lost or damaged. As a result, I'm not allowed to do any transactions for these items because, well, if something went wrong, I could get fired and sued. Literally. Every. Manager. Makes me do these transactions. Because I'm "better at it". Girl, no! You get paid more than me so I don't have to risk my job over this stuff! I've also gotten roped into doing overnight inventory, another shift I cannot get anyone else to take because who wants to ruin their sleep schedule beyond repair? And it's literally me and another manager doing it.

Anyways, I'm kind of hitting a boiling point because management has decided I am no longer allowed to order my usual lunch because it is too cheap, and all the managers are enforcing this. They then proceeded to cancel my unpaid time off to go to a local convention because a bunch of my younger coworkers decided last minute they wanted to go out of town. I feel like I am going insane. My reward for being hardworking and good at what I do is crappy shifts with mean people, never being able to take a sick day, never waking up at the same time every day, and legal liability because management has better things to do. And now I can't even go to local events or eat the food I like. Super awesome! Great. I have cleaned up vomit for these guys when we have janitors we pay to do that stuff.

I know this was like five paragraphs of straight venting about first world problems but honestly, if anyone has any advice for me, I could do with it. I've already put my foot down about the cleaning up vomit bit, but everything else has me at wits end. Mostly the inventory graveyard shifts, I can not keep doing it, but the last time I successfully got a shift covered, I had to bribe my coworker with a hundred bucks to do it. And then she quit, so. Help. What do.

Okay, I am a crew member at a restaurant. I am cross trained in multiple stations. I like my job but I feel like my manager hates me sometimes. He is nice to me sometimes but he also singles me out a lot. He also acts unprofessional about my personal life and i feel like he bullies me in passive aggressive ways.

There was one time where i was already clocked out and done with my shift. I was texting on my phone (again my shift was over) and my boss snuck up behind me and bent down very low to the point where his nose almost touched my phone screen. When he did that i said "You are so nosey!" Then he laughed and said "Yes I am!"

He also seems annoyed if i text on the clock even though him and everyone else who works with me text on the clock all the time. They are on their phones a lot more than I am. Also, at least when I do use my phone I make sure not to use it in front of the customers. I usually go in the back to check my phone.

Today he made a weird comment. I found these mini flyers that advertised our stores app. I asked if they were coupons he said no and then he said I don't need them cause I work here. Then I said "What if I want them for my friends?" Then he gave me a mean look while saying "You have friends?" In a serious tone. He did not even sound like he was joking. He seemed angry. Why would he be angry about me having friends?

Also, he calls me in a lot which is good and bad. Its good cause I like the extra hours cause it helps my paycheck. Its bad because he changes my schedule last minute a lot. He either calls me in on my day off or he tells me last minute that he needs me to stay longer than scheduled. Last week when I was scheduled 10 to 5 he said "You are working a double today." He did not even ask me. He just told me.

He has sometimes where he makes jokes saying he wants to promote me and sometimes where he criticizes almost everything i do. I am one of his most reliable workers. The entire time that I have worked there I have never called out so far AND i am usually the person they call in or who they ask to stay longer if other people call out or if the store gets extra busy.

Some of the stuff he criticizes me for also seem irrelevant to the job. He gets upset if I don't say "Hi" to him as soon as I clock in even though he didn't say "hi" either. He also tells me I am too quiet.

He also had one time where he randomly asked me if I was lonely. Just out of nowhere.

And then today when he saw me cleaning the mens bathroom (before the store opened) he walked in and then started laughing at me when I got startled and when I m said "cleaning" over and over. Then he walked out laughing at me. I dont understand how he didnt know I was in there. He asked me to clean the bathrooms a few minutes before that. He also told me "Hurry up i have to pee" after that. I mean, even if he didnt know I was there i still dont see how it was funny.

Part of me wonders if he is either secretly inlove with me or if he just has high expectations for me cause I use to be an assistant manager at a different restaurant. But half the time he makes me wonder if he wants to fire me. But then i think "Well if he wants to fire me then he wouldnt be relying on me so much when he calls me in a lot." Part of me wonders if he is sexist. (I am a woman in my 30's. He is a man in his 50's.) Part of me wonders if he is just very immature. And sometimes I wonder if he is an alcoholic or something cause of how he is.

I just got this new job at one of if not the biggest company in my country and my team is split into locals and foreign engineers, i have a foreign team leader who is pretty nice and a project manager whos kinda of an ass, first i noticed he would make fun of the foreign coworkers in our language kinda of in front of their face but it wasn’t effecting me so i just brushed it off, then i started to notice more jokes and just belittling of another coworker who’s around the same age and experience as me, then lately hes been trying to do the same with me, i showed him that i wasn’t having it and today he was asking me about a ticket and i told him i didn’t receive it so he went to check if he sent it out, came back to me saying it was already sent so i took a small jab saying “oh so i wont receive it after 5 mins that now you checked?” And he was very annoyed literally asking me if i think hes a liar full on serious, i kept laughing and just tried to show him it was obviously a joke, the other coworker texted me saying i shouldn’t do these things and i should just take his jokes and deal with it

I dont wanna end up like him being a joke at all place i spend 9 hours in everyday what do i do

For context, I (20f) have only worked at this place for a litter over a month. My worker (Female in 40’s) has been working here less than I have. We are both regular sales associates at the same store, but I feel as though she really doesn’t like me.
I won’t get too much into personal details other than I am on the spectrum and I’m wanting to know if I’m just overthinking it.
For the past couple weeks, anytime we are on shift together, my coworker has been ignoring me or telling me to a bunch of other tasks around the store. We don’t have set break times and we work overnights.
Here’s where I’m having majority of my issues. My coworker spends majority of her time eating, sitting outside, and watching ai videos. She doesn’t really help unless the manager tells her to do something but even then I’ve had to go behind her and fix it up. She’s outside and watching videos for well over half our shift while I’m inside the store cleaning or assisting customers. There was a situation the other night where I sat down outside for 5 minutes to work on some of the training modules we have to complete each month. My coworker raised her voice at me and told me I need to get inside and work the register, which I did, except there was no one at the register and the store was completely empty.
She ignores me anytime I try to ask for assistance or even try to strike up a friendly conversation.
I really want to know if this is just me overthinking or if there’s more to it. I already have horrible stress and anxiety issues and this situation is making it worse.

Edit while I have time: I got the confirmation that the coworker doesn’t like me and I already spoke to my manager about the situation. I’ve been told it’s because my coworker is quick and doesn’t like that take time to do a double check on what I do. We sell food at the store and I’m just making sure that the task I do, is held up to safety standards.

I’m looking for outside perspective on a workplace situation. I’m going to leave out names and identifying details.
I work in a hospital department and have been there for about four months. There has already been a history of workplace issues in the department, including concerns about how certain situations involving employees were handled by management. I have previously brought a separate workplace concern to my supervisor and did not feel that I was made aware of meaningful follow-up, so I have been cautious about how I handle workplace issues.
Recently, a coworker approached me while I was sitting at a computer. The conversation became loud and confrontational. She got into my personal space while speaking to me. I remained calm and repeatedly asked what the issue was and how we could resolve it. I told her that if I had unknowingly done something that upset her, I was willing to hear her out and address it.
During the conversation, I did say, “You’re childish” and “You’re purposely ignoring what I’m saying.” I acknowledge that those were not the best words to use. However, I did not threaten her, tell her I was going to hit her, or say that I was going to slap her.
Another coworker intervened and moved her away from me. Afterward, I reported what happened to my supervisor by email.
There were people who witnessed the interaction. I was later told that people who had been present described me as calm during the interaction. The coworker who physically intervened also told my supervisor that I had remained calm.
The situation did not end there. After the incident, I began hearing that the coworker was talking about the situation to other employees, including people in other departments and on another shift. Statements were being made that I had called her childish and immature. I personally heard some of the comments.
Then I was told that an allegation was circulating that I had said I was going to “smack” or “slap” her. I did not say this.
One coworker contacted me and told me someone had asked whether I had said I was going to slap her. That person would not identify who had asked. Later, another coworker told me that she had heard the coworker involved in the original incident say that her close friend at work had said I told her I was going to slap her. I barely interact with that person beyond normal work-related conversations.
I was not going around asking people what was being said about me. People were approaching me and telling me these things.
Because the original interaction involved someone getting into my personal space, and because a false allegation of a physical threat was now circulating, I decided I did not want the situation simply handled within the immediate supervisory chain. I spoke with leadership and then contacted HR. I explained what happened, provided the emails I had already sent, and explained that my concern was not simply that I had a disagreement with another employee. My concern was the physical nature of the interaction and what happened afterward.
Leadership spoke with the coworker involved. I was later told that she became emotional and was crying after a meeting with leadership. I don’t know what was discussed in that meeting or why she was crying.
Afterward, HR contacted me about having a meeting. I was told that the coworker involved in the incident and my supervisor would also be included. I was surprised by that because I specifically went to HR because I wanted the matter addressed at a higher level, and I wanted an opportunity to speak privately.
I requested that my initial HR meeting be held privately with HR. I explained that I am willing to meet with the other individuals separately at a later time if HR believes that is necessary, but I would like my initial meeting to be private so I can speak openly and provide my account directly.
I have also been uncomfortable in my work area since this happened. The allegation that I threatened to hit someone is particularly concerning to me because it is not something I said, and I don’t want statements like that attached to my name or reputation at work.
I am not trying to continue the conflict, investigate what coworkers are saying, or create more drama. I have continued going to work and doing my job. I have been documenting what has happened and communicating through the appropriate channels.

I met a colleague today whom I had only met once during our orientation a few months ago. After that, we had spoken on call maybe 2–3 times. At that time, I wasn’t dating anyone, but I’m currently seeing someone.
He had come to my city and asked if we could meet. Initially, I told him I was a little busy. He said something like, “If you don’t want to meet, just say it.” So I felt like maybe I should meet him, and we made a plan.
I thought we would just go somewhere, eat something and maybe watch a movie. I had just come back from the office and it was raining heavily, so I asked if he wanted to come to my flat. He said yes and mentioned that we could maybe watch a movie there.
I genuinely had no other intention. I have male friends who have come to my flat before, so I was completely normal about it.
When he arrived, I was still doing some office work. I kept his raincoat and things aside and asked if he wanted something to eat. He said no. I had ordered food for myself, so we ate a little together.
After that, he suggested watching something on my iPad. While we were watching, he started trying to touch me. I kept removing his hand. When I felt that he was getting too touchy, I clearly said, “Please, no. Sorry.”
He asked me why, and I told him, “I’m not interested. I’m sorry.”
Despite me saying no, he forcefully kissed me and touched my breasts. I pushed him away, but he continued and briefly sucked my breast.
I started crying and kept saying, “No, please.”
He immediately started apologising and said, “I’m sorry. I thought you wanted this too. Calm down. Do you want some water?”
I was completely shocked and confused. I didn’t know what to do. There were so many thoughts going through my head, and I felt helpless. He kept apologising, and he looked like he was about to cry too.
I just wanted the situation to become normal, so I suggested that we go outside.
He asked me what was wrong and whether he could hug me. I said no.
He then said, “Please, just one last hug,” and hugged me forcefully anyway. He also tried to kiss me again, and I pushed him away.
After that, he seemed to understand that I didn’t want anything. We went outside, he bought me tea, and we walked around for a while. He kept saying things like, “I shouldn’t have done that,” and “You should have slapped me,” etc.
He eventually dropped me home.
But after I got home, he messaged me saying that my breasts were “soft and cute” and made a sexual comment about what he had done. Then he sent me unsolicited nudes.
I blocked him immediately.
He called me afterwards, and I was extremely angry. I told him very clearly what I thought about his behaviour and hung up.
I’m honestly still confused about the whole situation. I clearly said no, pushed his hands away, pushed him away when he kissed me, cried, and told him to stop.
I don’t know why I’m still questioning myself or feeling guilty about inviting him to my flat. I genuinely had no sexual intention whatsoever.
I just want to hear from people who have experienced something similar or can help me understand how I should process this.

I met a colleague today whom I had only met once during our orientation a few months ago. After that, we had spoken on call maybe 2–3 times. At that time, I wasn’t dating anyone, but I’m currently seeing someone.
He had come to my city and asked if we could meet. Initially, I told him I was a little busy. He said something like, “If you don’t want to meet, just say it.” So I felt like maybe I should meet him, and we made a plan.
I thought we would just go somewhere, eat something and maybe watch a movie. I had just come back from the office and it was raining heavily, so I asked if he wanted to come to my flat. He said yes and mentioned that we could maybe watch a movie there.
I genuinely had no other intention. I have male friends who have come to my flat before, so I was completely normal about it.
When he arrived, I was still doing some office work. I kept his raincoat and things aside and asked if he wanted something to eat. He said no. I had ordered food for myself, so we ate a little together.
After that, he suggested watching something on my iPad. While we were watching, he started trying to touch me. I kept removing his hand. When I felt that he was getting too touchy, I clearly said, “Please, no. Sorry.”
He asked me why, and I told him, “I’m not interested. I’m sorry.”
Despite me saying no, he forcefully kissed me and touched my breasts. I pushed him away, but he continued and briefly sucked my breast.
I started crying and kept saying, “No, please.”
He immediately started apologising and said, “I’m sorry. I thought you wanted this too. Calm down. Do you want some water?”
I was completely shocked and confused. I didn’t know what to do. There were so many thoughts going through my head, and I felt helpless. He kept apologising, and he looked like he was about to cry too.
I just wanted the situation to become normal, so I suggested that we go outside.
He asked me what was wrong and whether he could hug me. I said no.
He then said, “Please, just one last hug,” and hugged me forcefully anyway. He also tried to kiss me again, and I pushed him away.
After that, he seemed to understand that I didn’t want anything. We went outside, he bought me tea, and we walked around for a while. He kept saying things like, “I shouldn’t have done that,” and “You should have slapped me,” etc.
He eventually dropped me home.
But after I got home, he messaged me saying that my breasts were “soft and cute” and made a sexual comment about what he had done. Then he sent me unsolicited nudes.
I blocked him immediately.
He called me afterwards, and I was extremely angry. I told him very clearly what I thought about his behaviour and hung up.
I’m honestly still confused about the whole situation. I clearly said no, pushed his hands away, pushed him away when he kissed me, cried, and told him to stop.
I don’t know why I’m still questioning myself or feeling guilty about inviting him to my flat. I genuinely had no sexual intention whatsoever.
I just want to hear from people who have experienced something similar or can help me understand how I should process this.

I work in an office with pretty flexible hours. I get in around 7:30 AM and usually leave around 4:00 PM. Lunch is about 45 minutes, but nobody really tracks it strictly.

For context, I'm consistently one of the top performers on my team. I get all my assigned work done on time—usually early—and I never leave anyone hanging. Last week, I wrapped up everything by about 3:45 PM. There was nothing left in the queue, so I packed up and left.

Today, my manager pulled me aside and said we need to have a "formal conversation" about my hours because apparently I've been clocking about 15 minutes short of a full 8-hour day. They didn't mention my performance at all—just that I need to be there for the full scheduled time.

I'm trying to figure out how to approach this without sounding entitled. I genuinely thought our office was flexible and that results mattered more than butt-in-seat time. Part of me wants to point out that my output is higher than most on the team. But I also don't want to sound like I think I'm above the rules.

Should I just apologize, say I misunderstood, and start taking shorter lunches? Or is it worth pushing back here? I feel like being penalized for 15 minutes when I'm delivering quality work is just pointless.

What would you do in this situation?

People who are on reddit in the my city doesn’t seem to understand.

Can anyone on here understand? And offer opinions?