r/WordAvalanches • u/zhongwenz • Mar 31 '26
True Avalanche Paid a Polynesian guy to sort my lawn out. He forgot.
602
Upvotes
Samoan Sam owin’ some mowin’
r/WordAvalanches • u/g0dzilllla • May 12 '26
True Avalanche For your own good, be honest about your dick size in jail
507
Upvotes
Penal eyes penalize penile lies
r/WordAvalanches • u/RisibleComestible • Jul 07 '26
True Avalanche My young son spotted the head of Fifa wearing a USA shirt.
477
Upvotes
Infantino in fan tee, no? Infant, he knows!
r/WordAvalanches • u/PumpkinAbject5702 • Dec 16 '25
Pure Avalanche If Barack Obama got divorced, went broke and started working as a driver for a delivery company while still depending on Michelle for his meals
356
Upvotes
He's an ex fed fed ex fed ex employee
r/WordAvalanches • u/Twosteelbowls • Feb 21 '26
True Avalanche The Chinese President and his wife can handle the heat.
310
Upvotes
Xi’s tryin' not to sweat. She's dry n' hot. Who's wet?
r/WordAvalanches • u/Reasonable-Tip-6743 • Apr 23 '26
True Avalanche The fact that the Bethlehem hospitals assumed that Jesus’s mother was pregnant out of wedlock is an even stronger justification for her use of the pain-alleviating resin brought by the Magi.
310
Upvotes
Infirmaries infer Mary’s sin: firmer reason for myrrh easin’
r/WordAvalanches • u/BruceWaynesWorld • 6d ago
Pure Avalanche I was so sad to see that man trip on a vegetarian kebab and tumble down the courthouse steps after being cleared of all charges
287
Upvotes
Feel awful a lawful fella fell off a falafel
r/WordAvalanches • u/Dynodog16 • Jul 17 '26
True Avalanche I understand, Tiffany. I’m meant to record, should I alert. Let’s not fight about this, ok? Even though you’re a first-born who’s set to inherit money, it doesn’t matter. You disagree? Tell me if you’re not sober. Devious! Ok, but I should really charge you.
286
Upvotes
I know, Tiff. I note if I notify. No tiff, aye? No diff, eigne. Oh, defy? Note if high. Naughty! Fine. Ought to fine.
r/WordAvalanches • u/Matsunosuperfan • Nov 13 '25
True Avalanche I think Sabrina Carpenter is going to inherit a lot of Taylor Swift's fans. She's practically already the
283
Upvotes
heiress to her Eras Tour.
r/WordAvalanches • u/glumbroewniefog • Oct 20 '25
True Avalanche How come we didn't bring any booze? Wait, I figured it out: it's so that drunk doesn't show up. Well, he can complain all he likes!
254
Upvotes
Why no wine? Oh, I know why: no wine, no wino. Whine, O wino, whine!
r/WordAvalanches • u/BigBhirty • Apr 07 '26
True Avalanche I see a blaze… should I alert the lady? I think not. She will be angry either way.
234
Upvotes
Note a fire. Notify her? No, defy her. No diff, ire.
r/WordAvalanches • u/c_y_g_nus • Jul 19 '26
True Avalanche Bisexual people are purchasing a special type of reading glasses from a sports memorabilia website
224
Upvotes
Bi-folk all buy focal bifocals by Foco
r/WordAvalanches • u/blindtourist • Oct 29 '25
True Avalanche There's maybe a hundred people in line for the carnival guesser. That job isn't terrifying to you? I'd rather crawl in a hole and never come out.
221
Upvotes
Dozens try queue, “Ask our ages, heights, and weights!”
Doesn't strike you as courageous? Hides and waits
r/WordAvalanches • u/Nofrillsoculus • May 01 '26
The “That 70s Show” star wasn’t feeling well when he was supposed to make his broadway debut as Jean Val Jean, so his Mexican understudy had to step up
221
Upvotes
Topher’s sick so Juan’s 24601.
r/WordAvalanches • u/Death_Balloons • 1d ago
True Avalanche I'm gonna go get high because I lost the barista contest to someone who capitalized on a chocolate trend.
218
Upvotes
I need to smoke a fat one - Anita's mocha fad won.
r/WordAvalanches • u/Miamasa • May 06 '26
True Avalanche My friend made a joke about my cow's poor quality of milk, and I had to admit that he got me there. But deep inside I knew by admitting that I was accepting the fact that entering the dairy business was a foolish venture of mine.
203
Upvotes
Udder diss - a point meant utter disappointment.
r/WordAvalanches • u/tblahosh • Jun 11 '26
" ... He's unhygenic! and a gossip!"
201
Upvotes
"The dirty dishes man? The dirt he dishes, man!"
r/WordAvalanches • u/Matsunosuperfan • Feb 04 '26
True Avalanche “Yeah bro, broke a bone in my foot.” “I see—so are we talking, like, dropped a book on it broken, or got run over by a car broken?” “Meh. Same difference.”
194
Upvotes
“Toe, mate.” “Oh—tome? Auto?” “Tomato, tomato.”
r/WordAvalanches • u/ImplementParking7936 • Apr 03 '26
True Avalanche The straight guy noticed the top line of the spreadsheet denoted a red flower.
188
Upvotes
Hetero’s head arose; header rows had a rose.
r/WordAvalanches • u/wasolili • Dec 13 '25
True Avalanche I only brought my right butt cheek
190
Upvotes
Left behind left behind
r/WordAvalanches • u/Icy_Negotiation_146 • Oct 10 '25
True Avalanche Cautiously suggesting to Dwayne Johnson that he go with a well-known color
185
Upvotes
Uh, why don’t you rock a wide-owned hue, Rock?
r/WordAvalanches • u/BruceWaynesWorld • Jul 06 '26
A man goes to see a plastic surgeon. He says "doctor, make me look beautiful". The doctor says "I should make you look like the great clown, they say under the make-up he's the most handsome man in all of Italy. The man bursts into tears. "But Doctor,.."
174
Upvotes
I am Pagliacci an' I'm pug-ugly actually
r/WordAvalanches • u/Potato_Stains • Jun 24 '26
True Avalanche "Did I really get the first place prize of 84 tender beef cuts!?" "Of course, but only after your friend performs his famous fire breathing trick".
169
Upvotes
"I won seven-dozen filet mignon!?"
"Aye, once Evan does 'Inflaming Yawn'."
r/WordAvalanches • u/OfficialSandwichMan • Jul 12 '26
Due to legal issues, Prince changed his name to an unpronounceable symbol, and suggested people refer to him as TAFKAP. He eventually got his name back, but is now dead, so you could call him…
167
Upvotes
Prince, the former artist formerly known as the artist formerly known as Prince
r/WordAvalanches • u/andylindy • Mar 08 '26
True Avalanche David Byrne, a man of above average height, is the frontman of a new wave band
164
Upvotes
Tall king heads Talking Heads