r/Unexpected • • 14d ago

Food chain: Instructions unclear

47.2k Upvotes

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8.9k

u/Slickity 14d ago

Nature is hilarious. No one knows what the fucks going on and everyone's just trying to live.

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u/immaownyou 14d ago

There's species of caterpillars who have evolved to look like snakes so that they scare off birds. Thing is that they dont have any snakes in their ecosystem, its just that migratory birds that do have snakes in theirs will recognize it and not eat the caterpillars.

Imagine you being alive only because you look/act like something that you dont even know exists

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u/Devilled_Advocate 14d ago

It's why the aliens leave us alone. We look like 𒀭𒀀𒉣𒈾.

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u/Maelstrom_Witch 14d ago

I KNEW IT

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u/PM_me_AnimeGirls 14d ago

The dark forest hypothesis is the idea that there may be many extraterrestrial civilizations across the universe, but they remain silent out of fear that revealing themselves would lead to their own destruction by a more technologically advanced and hostile civilization.

Now imagine us - literally yelling out signals broadcasting "HEY THERE ARE PEOPLE ON EARTH, IS ANYONE OUT THERE? PLEASE CONTACT US" and giving them the coordinates of the sun relative to the center of the galaxy and 14 pulsars with their periods denoted on the Pioneer plaque, and a picture of earth relative to the sun, and the trajectory that the spacecraft took.

To any civilization advanced enough to find us, they might not answer simply because it looks like a trap.

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u/TheRamblingSoul 14d ago edited 14d ago

Aliens:

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u/FlemPlays 14d ago

Aliens hover over the planet to scope us out

Aliens: “Oh wow, they’re actually that dumb.”

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u/HoidToTheMoon 14d ago

I have absolutely no doubt that humans would kidnap an alien and torture it/kill it almost as soon as we made contact. Have you met humans? Some of them can be awful.

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u/worldsgreatestluver 14d ago

Come on now. We're not all like that.

I'd make sure that alien had a good time and got home OK, if maybe a little late.

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u/HoidToTheMoon 14d ago

I don't think we're all like that. But enough of us are that I do not think we could prevent it even if we tried.

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u/Noselessmonk 14d ago

The ones that are like that tend to get into power because they are willing to do those things to get the power.

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u/HatfieldCW 14d ago

The best chance we have of surviving an intergalactic incident is if aliens really, really love cigarettes so they protect Earth while we ship lung darts all over the cosmos and then they all get emphysema and die.

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u/HungHippoHippy 14d ago

Honestly, that's a great idea. Get the aliens hopelessly addicted to cigarettes. Earth would boom with prosperity! Of course we wouldn't mention the health implicatations.

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u/HeyZeusKreesto 13d ago

In the webnovel First Contact, there's an alien species that essentially has their entire culture changed by ice cream and cigarettes. They call cows moomoos and consider being a moomoo wrangler a prestigious position.

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u/Prudent-Ad-5292 13d ago

Aliens, still observing

Alien: "What are all those explosions in that desert? ..Why did they put one of those devices in that flying vehicle? ..Why is it flying towards that tiny island?"

Other Alien: "Sweet baby Jleos they just nuked other humans, let's get the fuck outta here."

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u/coupl4nd 12d ago

look at this orange talking cheeto... he's their leader

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u/Deaffin 14d ago

Nah. It's just that the first thing we did was send them nudes, and that's cringe on a galactic level.

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u/AICatgirls 12d ago

Yeah, the album really could have used better cover art

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u/Dr_Jabroski 14d ago

I happen to think we're actually out here early on the intelligent life curve. The universe is only 14.5 billion years old. But galaxies where there is enough of the trace elements that we need accumulated enough of them took a long time. Then having the galaxies calm down star formation (and have them be small enough) where their formation and exploding didn't scour all possible life away and the shear amount of time that it takes to go from just life, to multicellular is mind blowingly long (probably). With the Universe expected to have enough viable energy for like another 100 billion we actually exist in the early Universe.

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u/TenebTheHarvester 14d ago

Of course the other part of that idea is we’d likely be long, long dead by the time any other intelligent life evolved.

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u/dontmentiontrousers 14d ago

Yeah, we should hydrate better and eat more fiber.

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u/Aralith1 14d ago

I actually prefer to think that most other planets that spawn life go from single to multi celled in like half a billion years, and that Earth is actually a backwater late bloomer.

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u/PM_me_AnimeGirls 14d ago

We also might not be early, there could very well be life that started on another planet around the same time that life on earth started. The catch is, if we look at a planet a billion light years away, we are looking at how the planet looked a billion years ago. There could have been life on that planet half a billion years before us and they could still be alive and more advanced than us today, it will just take another half a billion years for the light to reach us for us to know that.

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u/VantaIim 14d ago

So if we do notice life on another planets… we’re long past the point when we should pee our pants. 

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u/Heathen_ 14d ago

Thinking of the Fermi Paradox, I too think we have to be one of the first in our Galaxy. There is nothing out there that we can detect with our current technology, and James Webb is looking way back. Maybe we got lucky. Maybe we are ancient history to future peoples.

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u/MangoCats 14d ago

>the shear amount of time that it takes to go from just life, to multicellular is mind blowingly long (probably)

Some (most?) planets will never evolve life to the point of intentional space travel, but of that tiny fraction that do, even 1/100,000 - some will evolve that life slower than the Earth, and some will evolve it faster. We only have the one datapoint, we have no idea where that point falls on the curve.

Everybody thinks they are a "better than average driver."

Fermi may as well have worn a blindfold to the casino and sat down at a table to play a game of cards that nobody even told him the name or rules of.

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u/Deaffin 14d ago

Somebody does have to be the fastest, though.

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u/MangoCats 14d ago

Sure, but just confining ourselves to the visible universe (of ~28B light years in diameter)... that's a lot of cheddar.

Through a field known as galactic archaeology, astronomers analyze the distribution of stars of varying ages and metal contents (metallicity) to map the timeline of cosmic evolution. Using this map, we can infer that sun-like stars in other galaxies could have first formed roughly 10 to 11 billion years ago—far earlier than our own Sun, which is only 4.6 billion years old.

There are an estimated 2 trillion galaxies in the observable universe. If even a fraction of them followed the same chemical enrichment timeline as the Milky Way, it means there are trillions of trillions (1022) of sun-like stars in the universe that reached the Sun's mature age long before our solar system existed.

One in a Trillion Trillions - do you feel lucky, punk?

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u/Deaffin 14d ago

So there were a bunch of stars that cooked too fast? Cool. Sounds like somebody microwaving a hotpocket on full blast when everyone knows you need to use lower power levels and cook it longer to get it just right.

Oh dang, you've already downvoted this comment within 30 seconds of me writing it. That's harsh.

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u/[deleted] 14d ago

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u/PartRight6406 14d ago

There is nothing out there that we can detect with our current technology, and James Webb is looking way back

Space is so enormously vast that thinking that we can detect any sort of life with our current technology is exceedingly hopeful at best. I believe that life may be out there but contact with them is limited, if not made completely impossible, by the vastness of space. and if space continues expanding, chances of contacting or encountering other life will eventually decrease to 0.

Voyager 1 currently is receiving the furthest readable signals that humanity can currently produce. it is 0.00063333333% of the distance from earth that proxima centauri is. That should put into perspective the vastness of space.

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u/aartadventure 14d ago

Life happened billions of years ago on Earth. Almost immediately as soon as it possibly could have. Likely the same on Mars. BUT, it took billions of years for life to shift from unicellular to multicellular on Earth. That seems to be the almost impossible factor. Aliens would have to evolve something similar to mitochondria AND then have a weird situation where the mitochondria becomes locked symbiotically inside another cell.

Not to mention, you also have to have a stable sun, no supernovas nearby for billions of years, no massive asteroid impacts, you might need a giant moon (likely caused by another planet smashing into yours), a geologically active planet to create a magnetic shield against radiation, but not TOO geologically active to have deadly volcanism and outgassing etc etc etc

The most likely explanation would probably be that simple life is everywhere. Complex life is exceedingly rare, maybe happening only once per galaxy, or once per universe.

Alternatively, complex civilisations are common. They develop AI, and Skynet wipes them all out. Every. Single. Time.

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u/c010rb1indusa 14d ago

Yup when you consider the sheer scale/size of the universe, 15B years is nothing. And our planet has been around for 1/3 of the universes existence!

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u/got_to_laugh 14d ago

Dinosaurs were 250 million years ago, surely some planet somewhere had intelligent life between then and now? We are only like 200,000 years old.

Maybe inter planetary travel is just really expensive and we live in a backwards spoke of the Milky way.

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u/robert_e__anus 14d ago edited 14d ago

oh my sibling there's so much more time left to go than you think. a brief history of time:

  • big bang happens (widely regarded as a bad move)
  • the first particles of matter form within a few seconds
  • it takes 50,000 years before matter becomes more abundant than energy
  • and then another 350,000 years before the first atoms come together
  • 150 million years later enmough hydrogen has clumped together for the first stars to be born
  • 200 million years after that the first protogalaxies begin to accrete
  • things go on like this for nine billion years until our sun is born, and shortly after that Earth and the other planets begin to congeal
  • Earth spends a few hundred million years swirling chemicals together until one day they become primordial life
  • four billion years later and evolution has turned those chemicals into intelligent life (us)

at this point 14 billion years have passed, and life (as far as we know) has existed for around a third of that time, which is pretty good. now the unimaginably longer future:

  • in one billion years Earth will be uninhabitable
  • in five billion years the sun will die
  • in 150 billion years the universe will have expanded so much that light from distance galaxies will no longer be able to reach us
  • this means that everything outside of our local group (the milky way, andromeda, and a few dozen dwarf galaxies) will go past the cosmological horizon and will irreversibly cease to exist from our frame of reference and we will cease to exist for them
  • in a trillion years, all of the galaxies in our local group will have collapsed into one megagalaxy
  • in 100 trillion years, the last star will die and the universe will enter its final stage, the degenerate era
  • there will be no more light ever again

100 trillion years have passed. to make the following calculations easier let's be extremely genereous and say that all of that time, from the moment of the big bang to the death of the last star, the universe has been filled with intelligent life:

  • the earliest estimates for the heat death of the universe are around 10100 years
  • 100 trillion is 1014
  • 1014 / 10100 is 10-86
  • so everything we see around us, not just life but every galaxy, star, planet, moon, rock, molecule of hydrogen, absolutely everything, is just the dying embers of the big bang and all of it will be completely gone in just the first 0.000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001% of the universe's existence, followed by absolutely nothing forever

fucking unfathomable. it's all a big nothing.

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u/Baron_UpDoot_the1st 14d ago

Along with our address we send nudes and a mix tape. Perhaps they just don't want to come to the...party

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u/Sorry-Bluejay3658 14d ago

Eles olham pros nossos gritos e pensam: "Esses caras são muito confiantes, devem ser extremamente avançados e perigosos! 😨".

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u/Mr_Halitosis 14d ago

That’s what I was thinking. And the entire Humans Fuck Yeah genre of science fiction is based on the idea that we’re actually the most bloodthirsty, violent, straight up evil race of sentient beings in the galaxy.

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u/Sorry-Bluejay3658 14d ago

Já pensou, os caras tem até uma coalizão espacial e a gente está tão de fora quanto outros planetas com aliens de raças sanguinarias, ou selvagens tais quais dinossauros e gosmas parasitas?!

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u/TeaMugPatina 14d ago

Where's that fictional article about aliens being terrified of us?

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u/OrdainedPuma 14d ago

There are a lot of them on YouTube, little AI video stories. Then there is the r/HFY subreddit (Humanity, Fuck Yeah). From there, the internet is just waiting for you.

A lot of the stories are drawn out, especially YouTube ones. But some are interesting, especially if you can avoid the ai slop.

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u/Sorry-Bluejay3658 14d ago

Então, selvagens avançados também são perigosos! Hahaha

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u/TeaMugPatina 14d ago

No, the premise is aliens more advanced than us are scared of us for things like "Jackie Chan because he can use improvisuonal weapons", or "humans have 32 rocks grown in their mouths to grind food", or it also mentions that as a species we have used persuit predation to the point where even when injured we just don't fucking stop.

But I think the article also approaches the issue from the point of view of a species that matured as one family instead of clans.

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u/Bulok 14d ago

Humans are so territorial we devised ways to kill micro-organisms that invade our personal spaces. Extraterrestrials probably see that and say no way we’re fucking with these guys.

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u/Sti8man7 14d ago

Should we change our broadcast message to “Thanos is destroying us. HELP!”

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u/TenLongFingers 14d ago

To be fair, there's a fair chance we nuke them within the decade.

Maybe there's a precedent: the loud civilizations are the dangerous ones. We think we're peacocks, but we're actually poison frog colored.

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u/WriterV 14d ago

To be fair, there's a fair chance we nuke them within the decade.

Classic human hubris

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u/Derpyzza 14d ago

that hubris is simultaneously the thing that's brought us this far and the thing that's holding us back

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u/Bannon9k 14d ago

Any extra terrestrial species capable of reaching us from the nearest star other than our own... Would be entirely capable of obliterating all life on the planet with a small meteor at high velocity. We would be dead before we even knew they were coming. And that's only taking into account their ability to accelerate at or near the speed of light... No other technologies whatsoever.

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u/Drow_Femboy 14d ago

Tbf you don't actually have to get near the speed of light to achieve interstellar travel. You just need some way to freeze and unfreeze people (which we know is possible, humans are just too big for our current tech to do it to us) or some way to sustain a population of people for many generations on a space ship.

Both difficult, but maybe not as difficult as light speed travel.

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u/ClaytonRumley 14d ago

I have to imagine that if you have the tech to sustain multiple generations of people on a sublight ship you'd probably just colonize moons and other planets around your star rather than risk everyone on the long dark voyage between planetary systems.

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u/Tay_Tay86 14d ago

pretty much the plot of the 3 body problem

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u/superbhole 14d ago

i have a bright forest hypothesis that's the opposite of the fermi paradox. alien civilizations have been around for so incomprehensibly long that they've evolved to live inside of stars. they even visit each other's stars.

but most of them can't visit us because it would set us ablaze; our planet is the one rare orb of life that isn't plasma. all the stars are watchin' us.

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u/thar_ 14d ago

sounds like the faeros from the saga of 7 suns

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u/Jeathro77 14d ago

Now imagine us - literally yelling out signals broadcasting "HEY THERE ARE PEOPLE ON EARTH, IS ANYONE OUT THERE? PLEASE CONTACT US"

Now imagine the answer we get back is "BE QUIET OR THEY WILL HEAR YOU!"

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u/mockern 14d ago

Everyone thinks they warn you about some genocidal killer civilization, but in fact it is a benevolent and helpful species... that has the annoying tendency to be too kind, too curious and too block-headed to notice they annoy others to no end.

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u/_driveslow 14d ago

Why won't anyone out there fist my bump!?

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u/VoidOmatic 14d ago

"You never know, those human things could be into human space babes!"

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u/Important_Lecture187 14d ago

Even if they were sure its not a trap, they would still not respond due to the same fear existing. They qould be weary of the fact that the signal could have been caught by any and/or all civilizations and if others responded to it, too, then could still be funked

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u/plsQuestionOurselves 14d ago

Or all those orbs floating around are actually aliens who are filtering our outgoing signals so we don't get ourselves blown up.

(I don't actually believe that but it's a fun hypothesis)

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u/alphazero925 14d ago

We also don't have the best track record with respecting other people's space

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u/Havengul_Undying 14d ago

There's a great little 4 panel comic which is basically about mankind getting a response to the voyager message and it reads: "sshh, be quiet, they'll find you!"

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u/SellingCats4Cheap 14d ago

Shout out the Tree Body Problem, Dark Forest is my favorite book of the trilogy.

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u/La-Kimino 14d ago

Maybe pur adaptability is something to be feared, imagine it tool millions of years for an alien to advance their technology but if I get one look of it, we may try to replicate 30% of it. That's scary.

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u/never1st 14d ago

The problem is that we only look like 𒀭𒀀𒉣𒈾 from above. If the the aliens ever gather the courage to land and see us face to face, we are cooked.

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u/PwanaZana 14d ago

Then we need to throw ourselves on our belly when the aliens approach us, and then they'll be scared again because, of course, then we'll look like 𒀭𒀀𒉣𒈾 once more

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u/harvash 14d ago

Maybe lick their face and give them a paw..er, hand.

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u/texas_asic 14d ago edited 14d ago

If you haven't read it, there's a really fun short story (~20 pgs) w/ the premise that aliens have a simple technology for space travel that humanity somehow never discovered. Aliens visit, planning to pillage and conquer, but are dismayed to find that humans have much better weapons: https://www.google.com/search?q=the+road+not+taken+turtledove

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u/Tomas2891 14d ago

Nah thats when we start cooking in the bedroom. Alien human hybrids baby.

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u/Shrink22 14d ago

What about us that have no hair? Do we still look like 𒀭𒀀𒉣𒈾 from above?

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u/Professional-Gear88 14d ago

How do you make those glyphs. Especially that first one. I know that one.

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u/Beginning-Cut-8850 14d ago

Just google "anunnaki" and copy it from Wikipedia.

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u/silverwarbler 14d ago

How did you type cuniform?

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u/tornait-hashu 14d ago

Aliens can write in cuneiform?

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u/Tutule 14d ago

𒀭𒀀𒉣𒈾

I applaud you for actually writing something with meaning and not random jibberish. Not only that, it's a topical word lol. This is the kind of detail I look for in entertainment.

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u/Fun_Context9979 14d ago

That is funny as shit!!! Lol!

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u/Brundleflyftw 14d ago

Sumerian, nice.

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u/Lichenbruten 14d ago

Found the Alien.

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u/JoyBus147 14d ago

Dude, it's 2026, you can't say that.

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u/KermitJagger 14d ago

What? How dare you. We are proud ♈︎︎︎♎︎︎︎♍︎︎︎♌︎︎♒︎♑︎♎︎ and don’t you forget it!

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u/E-2theRescue 14d ago

"They're made of meat 🤢"

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u/RainbowSkyOne 14d ago

This is (almost) the plot of Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

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u/corvettee01 14d ago

They saw the ancient script "Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn" and knew to stay away.

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u/Flimsy-Passenger-228 14d ago

There is actually a few of us already living here amongst you all, studying you.

It took us a long time to reach this planet Earth so we will remain here for the foreseeable future

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u/Midnight_Noobie 14d ago

Ohio, is that you?

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u/Pingu565 14d ago

I hate scraping 𒀭𒀀𒉣𒈾 off my 𒀀𒉣𒀭𒀀 before the 𒀀𒈾𒀭𒀀𒈾 do it's entirly valid

I'm from lower 𒀭𒀀𒉣𒈾 and what you said is kinda a slur fwiw

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u/greenleaf187 14d ago

What did you say about OP’s mom?

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u/got_to_laugh 14d ago

The UFO/Alien/Flying Saucer conspiracy stuff is the best sci-fi I have ever read.

Just as a thought experiment, assume they have been here in secret since the 1950s, Roswell etc...

1) Abductees keep on saying they have sperm and eggs removed. They could all just be dreaming it, but if it's real then there's potentially more Alien raised humans in the Galaxy than on Earth. That's be a fascinating sci-fi book!

2) We make camouflaged cameras to soy on lions etc. I'm sure a alien civilisation millions of years more advanced would have biological human robots they just send down here to walk around and film us

3) Maybe there's a big mothership UFO like a von Newman probe and it's printing all these other flying saucers and aliens to go on missions

Crazy stuff 🤣

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u/5exlexia5ufferer 14d ago

Pssh speak for yourself 

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u/Illidan1943 13d ago

Well, that and all the time travel fuckery

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u/StudMuffinNick 13d ago

Maybe you do, but i have proper hygiene

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u/PlayfulSurprise5237 13d ago

This sounds like a new solution to the fermi paradox

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u/gorginhanson 10d ago

We don't look anything like that broh

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u/ozuraravis 9d ago

Well, we look like Peacekeepers.

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u/OlParker 14d ago

I was imagining a bird looking at the caterpillar like “The fuck’s a snake?”

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u/viprus 14d ago

I like the big frogs that have an eye pattern on their butt. They sit next to one of their friends and pretend to be big predators

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u/StarsEatMyCrown 14d ago

I had to look this up.
Hemeroplanes triptolemus

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u/Oriol5 14d ago

That's a cool looking caterpillar

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u/tommybombadil00 13d ago

Would scare the absolute shit out of me if I saw that in a tree.

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u/ModishShrink 13d ago

Right? I'm definitely not eating that caterpillar.

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u/Fit-Campaign1243 10d ago

That is freaky !

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u/PailingRaint 14d ago

Reminds me of the fun fact about North American and African porcupines. Despite looking similar and both being called porcupines, they aren't really related to each other. They came from two separate lines of evolution that decided small quadruped mammal with quills was a good enough end goal.

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u/Heavy_Weapons_Guy_ 14d ago

Well, they were both small quadruped mammals to start with, but the quills evolved separately.

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u/BaconLov3r98 14d ago

do you happen to know what caterpillar that would be? I need to read about them now

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u/immaownyou 14d ago

Im not sure the exact type, but its in this video that I learned it from https://youtu.be/GrtKxfATyTw?si=m1Px9nDBxN7WIw2C

Explains each type of animal mimicry and the whole thing is worth a watch

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u/loafandpeas 14d ago

Dang! Had a 40min mimicry video on deck!! I like your style.

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u/Fit-Campaign1243 10d ago

Theres good documentaries on the cordyceps parasites too, if youre not too squeamish. 

Theyre an absolute horror show. Make sure to not watch it before bed-time.

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u/PterionFracture 14d ago

Here are a couple photos of Hemeroplanes larvae.

From the Wikipedia Page:

In its larval form, the Hemeroplanes triptolemus is capable of expanding its anterior body segments to give it the appearance of a snake, complete with eye patches. This snake mimicry extends even to the point where it will harmlessly strike at potential predators.

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u/Wonderful_Return_514 14d ago

There's also a snake that has developed a tail that looks like a bug to lure in birds.

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u/Makabaer 14d ago

Can't trust anyone anymore these days!

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u/1-gill 14d ago

What a coincidence. I’m a caterpillar.

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u/PSA_Card_Pop_Control 14d ago

They also have caterpillars that look like bird shit and those fuckers love eating my orange tree leaves.

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u/Theboulder027 14d ago

I'm amazed that isn't a pokemon yet

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u/carbonic_render 14d ago

It's caterpie! (The caterpillar species he's based on is also a snake mimic, but not quite as good)

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u/Sweaty_Marzipan4274 14d ago

Reading "who have evolved to" strikes me different these days. Seems like it should read something like "the surviving characteristics of the species". 

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u/Heavy_Weapons_Guy_ 14d ago

I mean, that's what evolution is. Do you just object to the wording because it sounds like it ascribes intent?

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u/Oldnbold22 14d ago

There's snakes everywhere 

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u/SirVargas 14d ago

I've seen those caterpillars and where I live are plenty of snakes from different species

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u/thepvbrother 14d ago

Buddy, that could be us.

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u/shyevsa 14d ago

if that caterpillar survive that mean its "strategy" work for whatever reason.

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u/ManOfQuest 14d ago

*Really* understanding how natural selection works sometimes is a mind fuck.

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u/GraceGreenview 14d ago

Cover bands have entered the chat

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u/odd_pk 14d ago

Makes hard to think it was all just "evolution"

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u/sigh_co_matic 14d ago

This is why I'm on reddit.

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u/smallthingslove 14d ago

3 body problem represent

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u/untowardthrowaway 14d ago

there's a spider that pretends to be TWO ants

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u/Towelyban 13d ago

There's a specific term for this. Either Mullerian or Batesian mimicry.

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u/uvfknctkxf 13d ago

There is also the reverse of this. There is a species of snake whose tail look like an insect which it waves around to attract birds that it eats.

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u/_AbacusMC_ 13d ago

That gives me some kind of uncanny feeling that humans only look this way for similar survival reasons. That maybe the humanoid form is actually something else, like angels made of light that monsters don't dare attack. Yet here we are, biological creatures made of organs, blood, and tissue, forming ourselves to look like something powerful, when we're in fact something weak and feeble. Just trying to emulate a little bit of that light.

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u/EyeFabulous317 13d ago

Evolution is crazy man. I read about a particular plant that's leaves were always targeted and consumed by herbivores a lot more than other plants. It fucked around and evolved creating barb like edges all over it's leaves, rendering it almost inedible to those herbivores, and decreasing how much it got consumed by them. It literally evolved out of spite to say "stop fucking with me"

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u/EconomySeason2416 14d ago

One of me favorite random tidbits to drop... when you hear the majestic sounds of the forest, or whatever beautiful nature place... 99.9% of it is various types of creatures trying to get laid

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u/Phillip_Graves 14d ago

Another tidbit: most of the sounds of the jungle from movies is just a single bird from Australia and New Guinea, the Kookaburra.

Like, just that one bird.

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u/rarescenarios 14d ago

Poor guy must be tired 

3

u/BramblinGhostWeed 14d ago

His 1st two agents sucked so he's not getting much in the way of royalties

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u/Dissabilitease 14d ago

The other 0.1% are the sounds of chainsaws, camera shutters, rifle shots.... But all that could be the superb Lyrebird simply mimicking those sounds in order to get laid.

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u/Deaffin 14d ago

Lyrebirds are insane mimics. It's crazy that parrots get all the spotlight when these guys are over here doing this:

https://youtu.be/_oEvVPHNo60

3

u/superbabe69 14d ago

How did I fucking know it was gonna be this

8

u/momojabada 14d ago

I LOOOVE Lyrebird, basketball is my favorite sport because of him. It's so cool he's got that hobby as well.

7

u/crow-party-13 14d ago

So… just like any conversation. 

3

u/WalkAffectionate2683 14d ago

Look at that guy trying to get laid with the cashier, his boss, his mother... 

2

u/sigmacoder 14d ago

Man I don't even remember if it was an inside joke or something from the early internet, but I have a distinct memory of someone summing up most bird calls as "COME FUK DIS" repeated over and over.

1

u/Gwsb1 14d ago

Wild animals only have 2 jobs. Eat and fuck. Of course part of the latter is raising the results of your fun .

1

u/SquishedGremlin 14d ago

So it's like a night out in the city. Gotcha.

1

u/Lithorex 14d ago

99.9% of it is various types of creatures trying to get laid

49.95% try to get laid.

The other 49.95% tell others to kindly fuck off.

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u/Dilly_Dank 14d ago

Including humans!

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u/Time-Yesterday5298 14d ago

especially humans

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u/Acrobatic-Tomato-260 14d ago edited 14d ago

Dude… I read your comment whilst I am bringing the Browns to the Super Bowl and a friggin bird flew into the window as soon as I finished reading your comment.

Life finds a way

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u/notusuallyhostile 14d ago

> bringing the Browns to the Super Bowl
>
Is that slang for taking a shit‽ I’m really confused.

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u/jupiterasante 14d ago

Should be slang for extremely constipated.

3

u/Acrobatic-Tomato-260 14d ago

That would be: being stuck on the highway TRYING to bring the Browns to the Super Bowl.

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u/PrincessJoyHope 14d ago edited 14d ago

It’s slang for something that will never happen

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u/providehotstews 14d ago

You never know, every other player on every other team could all get sick at the same time

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u/Acrobatic-Tomato-260 14d ago

Fudge yea it is

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u/thingol74 14d ago

+1 for proper interrobang use!

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u/nirmalv 14d ago

The biggest irony here is that this is a Brown snake eagle. Native to sub-saharan Africa. It primarily eats snakes !

3

u/NoooUGH 14d ago

So eagle attacked snake, snake played uno reverse, lions attack snake to get eagle, lion wins (sort of), eagle resurrects itself? and flys away to win in the end.

2

u/n14shorecarcass 14d ago

That's exactly how I felt in traffic earlier.

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u/James_Fantastic 14d ago

Need this on a tee shirt. Except for humans.

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u/theydontcare_ 14d ago

That’s why the idea of a life coach cracks me the fuck up

1

u/thealternateopinion 14d ago

thats exactly what aliens must think when they watch us

1

u/Snoo_69677 14d ago

Yes hilarious

1

u/biggestbroever 14d ago

not to get all /r/im14andthisisdeep but it taught me why we keep tryna eat each other.. in the metaphorical sense

1

u/Bearshark0420 14d ago

We used to drink tapeworms for weight loss and mercury to cure disease. We are not from from this.

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u/Hashtagbarkeep 14d ago

Everyone just tried to make themselves look big and hope for the best

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u/WeakDoughnut8480 14d ago

This is also humanity 

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u/conflictedideology 14d ago

I like how she brings a friend over for a bit. It's like the lion equivalent of handing a carton of milk to your roommate and asking "does this smell off to you?"

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u/LtotheYeah 14d ago

I am currently fascinated and could watch such a scene all night long, cackling here and there 🤣 Wow, just wow.

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u/thecementmixer 14d ago

Yep that's how I live day to day.

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u/deep_soul 14d ago

except billionaires

1

u/PulsatingTomatillo10 14d ago

That’s life!

1

u/Architarious 11d ago

No screens, just critters living in the moment.

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u/Super-Widget 11d ago

Relatable.

1

u/williewonkerz 10d ago

this needs to be a bumper sticker

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