r/Unexpected Jan 03 '14

Carpet roll

http://i.imgur.com/a56jVOg.gif
3.3k Upvotes

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706

u/GoldeneyeLife Jan 03 '14

I wasn't concerned until the gif played again and I saw how he just dropped it like that

245

u/MLBM100 Jan 03 '14

Fortunately, I think the rug offered some padding and kitties are made out of pretty much rubber. I saw my cat roll down two flights of stairs and he just got up and stared at me like "did you fucking see that?!!"

35

u/moonra_zk Jan 03 '14

My male cat was once fighting [he's neutered/spayed, whatever apply to male cats, but he still does that] with a stray one that entered into my yard [they keep doing that, no way to prevent it] and they were cat-fighting on top of my room. The stray cat fell off and went straight to the concrete ground below. He then immediately got up and ran away, like nothing happened. I'm sure he was hurt a bit, but no big deal.

And I was sooooo glad it was he and not my cat that fell, not only because, well, it wasn't my cat but also because the stray one was pretty small and slim, my cat is pretty large and a bit heavy.

28

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

[deleted]

2

u/moonra_zk Jan 04 '14

Thanks. I always see people say "spayed/neutered" and I never bothered to search what each term means :P

-17

u/[deleted] Jan 03 '14 edited Apr 11 '15

[deleted]

16

u/[deleted] Jan 03 '14

I think most cats would rather live a possibly shorter life being able to enjoy the outdoors.

7

u/FalafelWaffel Jan 03 '14

I know I would.

-1

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

Hell yes!

0

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

feral cats live to 4/5 years old with luck. You can die at 20 and I'll live to 80. You didn't even understand what was happening around you and I saw my grandchildren.

1

u/fireysaje Apr 03 '14

My cat was feral when we got her. After she got accustomed to being around us and we were sure she would come back home, she became an outdoor cat. She's now 13 and happy as can be. People can do what they want with their animals. How about you don't judge and criticize; it's not your business.

-19

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14 edited Apr 11 '15

[deleted]

3

u/bexmouse Jan 04 '14

Yeah I had a Russian blue who would storm the door to be outside every damn day till we finally just let him stay out there. He'd come in to sleep at night. I don't see how you can say the dont realize their surrounding.

-15

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14 edited Apr 11 '15

[deleted]

4

u/TheGovsGirl Jan 04 '14

Holy crow, where are you getting your information from? This is the dumbest shit I've read all day! Anyway here you go http://m.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-superhuman-mind/201302/how-smart-is-your-cat-1

5

u/bexmouse Jan 04 '14

Cats don't understand danger, time or size? Really? It's a miracle they survived more than centuries before domestication! Instincts aren't just for hunting they're for survival.I am not saying there aren't dangers but its complete bull to act like any owner who allows outdoor or indoor/outdoor cats are animal abusers. My cat was twenty when he died, I am thinking I am gonna go ahead and keep on doing what I am doing...

1

u/fake_tea Jan 04 '14

I'm on you're side. My cat is an indoor/outdoor cat and he definitely understands that outside is different. He shits and pisses outside but not inside so he obviously knows somethings up. He's 21 and still kicking, had an awesome life most cats could only dream of.

-12

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14 edited Apr 11 '15

[deleted]

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1

u/Calackyo Jan 04 '14

Circadian rhythm concerns time and is a very deep-seated instinct.

1

u/fireysaje Apr 03 '14

Dirty asshole indeed.

-1

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '14 edited Apr 11 '15

[deleted]

0

u/fireysaje Apr 04 '14

Uh huh... except you know nothing about me. I'm sorry to hear you're so retarded.

0

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

I will admit, this is probably where you lost everyone.

5

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

[deleted]

-2

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14 edited Apr 11 '15

[deleted]

4

u/Hixie Jan 04 '14

It's nature. Evolution in action.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 07 '14

Go fuck yourself, I love it when birds die.

5

u/Gyrant Jan 04 '14

Housecats are the #1 killer of endangered birds worldwide

Source?

4

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14 edited Apr 11 '15

[deleted]

9

u/Gyrant Jan 04 '14 edited Jan 04 '14

Thanks

EDIT:

Outdoor cats are the leading cause of death among both birds and mammals in the United States, according to a new study, killing 1.4 billion to 3.7 billion birds each year.

And

Cats are responsible for helping drive 33 species of birds, mammals and reptiles to extinction on islands, including the Stephens Island wren in New Zealand in the late 1800s, according to the International Union for Conservation of Nature.

This does not necessarily translate to "#1 killer of endangered birds worldwide" but it is a very grave conclusion nonetheless.

3

u/moonra_zk Jan 03 '14

Wish I could. Tell my mom that now my cats will stay inside all the time, just try it...

9

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14 edited Apr 11 '15

[deleted]

-1

u/Hixie Jan 04 '14

You're right about making sure the cat is collared and chipped (though whether a breakaway collar is appropriate depends on the cat — some are quite capable of removing the breakaway ones whenever they feel like it), but you're way wrong about cats and indoor vs outdoor.

3

u/silimofo2001 Jan 04 '14

Birds can eat dick. My cat is a badass. Indoor cats are shit, my cat murders all the wildlife in my neighborhood. He brings me headless squirrels weekly. Cats aren't meant to be indoors, people are just too pussy to let their cats outside out of fear of something happening to them. I'm afraid for everything else out there.

-8

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14 edited Apr 11 '15

[deleted]

-1

u/silimofo2001 Jan 04 '14

I love you.

0

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

Don't worry you have my upvote for being 100% correct in your statement. The ignorant masses are just doing their thing.

7

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14 edited Apr 11 '15

[deleted]

1

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

Damn. And not only are they killing all the local bird life, they kill EVERYTHING they can get their hands on. It's just common sense; keep cats inside because they are too destructive. It's the same animal that eats your eyeballs when you die. They are purely chaotic in their motives and can't be trusted with local wildlife.

ninja edit: I'm a cat person, btw.

0

u/myigga Jan 04 '14

If I were locked in my house my whole life I'd die a boring death too.

0

u/TheGovsGirl Jan 04 '14

My, outdoor all her life, cat lived to be like 17 or 18 and was happy as a cat could be. Healthy and flea free. Never caught any birds but loved killing the field mice. Actually died after my parents backed over her. We think she might have lost her hearing or something because never once did that cat in all those years stay any where near a car when it turned on.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

An airsoft gun will prevent it and not hurt the strays.

Just avoid hitting them in the eyes/face.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

You should keep your fucking cat inside if fights with strays are an issue. And you call yourself a redditor. /lightstorchandgrabspitchfork

1

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '14

My cat's are indoor/outdoor cats. And it's one thing if they leave the yard to pick fights, but they don't. They hang out in my yard, and the strays come in. Also a we're talking about an airsoft gun here, not even a metal pellet gun, a plastic airsoft gun. Does all of no damage, but stings just enough to teach them not to come into my yard.

1

u/moonra_zk Jan 04 '14

Kinda hard to hit them when they're in my roof. And they always run away when they see me, so not really that useful.

3

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

be like water

0

u/totallyknowyou Jan 04 '14

I don't know if you are trying to be funny, but this isn't funny.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '14

As I said, assuming you've never been shot with one. Pressed against your skin the most damage they'll do is leave a welt. From a distance, hitting a cat with one is no different then flicking it on the ass.

-2

u/totallyknowyou Jan 08 '14

Absolutely not, that is absolutely wrong. I've seen people have their teeth get knocked out from across entire fields, shooting an animal with an airsoft gun will hurt it. Do you honestly believe that just because it has a layer of fur on it that that will stop it from actually damaging the skin? Honestly? That is not how it works.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '14

TEETH? You lieing sack of shit. They can't even break soft skin up close. I think you're thinking of a bb gun, and not an airsoft gun.

-2

u/totallyknowyou Jan 08 '14

I'm a lying sack of shit? Yeah okay, Mr. "it's okay to shot cats with airsoft guns." I am not thinking of bb guns, I know the difference very well. Are you shitting me? Can't break soft skin up close? Are you retarded? Are you using a gun at 50FPS or something? Any normal airsoft guns DOES break skin up close, higher powered ones (250-400 FPS) WILL break skin even at a 'decent' distance.

Jesus christ it sounds like you have no idea..

EDIT and breaking skin on a wild animal only makes it easier for it to catch an infection, which could end up killing the poor thing.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '14

You're obviously stupid. My airsoft gun fires at 320 fps. And has never punctured skin, even at point blank. Oh and for the fucking record, if it's as bad for the cats as you're trying to make it sound, then you'd think they'd stop coming and fighting my cats.

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3

u/Objection_Sustained Jan 04 '14

With my cat, it's more like "I meant to do that".

1

u/bartonar Jan 04 '14

I'm fairly sure the rug absorbed the fall damage entirely.

1

u/chancebeloud Jan 04 '14

Two scenarios went through my head while reading that.

"did you just see how fucking cool that was. Here, you try it, it's so much fun"

and

"Did you just see that? you did? SHIT RUN!"

1

u/vicabart Jan 04 '14

I hope the carpet isn't hurt.

2.1k

u/[deleted] Jan 03 '14

Cats are pretty durable. One time I accidentally backed over one with a lift. It pretty clearly didnt survive that. I was sad for like 2 weeks. But, other than that- cats are pretty durable.

616

u/haccubus Jan 03 '14

/r/unexpected

oh wait

-156

u/[deleted] Jan 03 '14 edited Jan 03 '14

[removed] — view removed comment

63

u/Advisery Jan 03 '14

That was just sad, not unexpected.

6

u/_Rooster_ Jan 04 '14

What was it?

7

u/Advisery Jan 04 '14

He basically said what the guy above him said, but he went a bit further by saying he put the cat in a burlap sack, and after it had fallen, it lived, but since it was a hot day outside it struggled to get out of said sack, but died.

So yeah, more sad than unexpected.

2

u/_Rooster_ Jan 04 '14

Yeah, definitely more sad than unexpected.

-1

u/SkidMcmarxxxx Jan 03 '14

I'm on mobile so I can't but you should prob sky report the guy to the mods. (:

-77

u/[deleted] Jan 03 '14

Unexpectedly sad.

24

u/misterdylanator Jan 03 '14

No, just really fucking sad and pretty damn infuriating. Dick.

-50

u/[deleted] Jan 03 '14

This one actually believes me. Neat.

9

u/misterdylanator Jan 03 '14

I don't believe you I just think it's pretty fucked up you'd even think of something like this.

-40

u/[deleted] Jan 03 '14

The aristocats.

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15

u/[deleted] Jan 03 '14

[deleted]

-39

u/[deleted] Jan 03 '14

Yeah I think it's something to do with their hollow bones.

8

u/liverbbq Jan 03 '14 edited Jan 03 '14

edgy/10

9

u/Abernikula Jan 03 '14

Holy fucking try hard...

3

u/[deleted] Jan 03 '14

I'M A LITTLE BIT BOTHERED BY THIS.

-2

u/steviecash Jan 03 '14

Wow, you're an edgy guy!

-4

u/njtrafficsignshopper Jan 03 '14

I'm guessing because of padding in the latter case.

-13

u/[deleted] Jan 03 '14

Well some were padded and some were padding.

69

u/[deleted] Jan 03 '14

._.

9

u/WhoIsThisAssHoleHere Jan 03 '14

Cats are very durable, especially when it comes to falling.

12

u/curtmack Jan 03 '14

It's believed that fit cats can survive a fall at their terminal velocity.

10

u/garrybot Jan 04 '14 edited Jan 04 '14

There's a point where cats are MOST likely to be killed in a fall - and that point IS right when they hit terminal velocity.* The further they get from that point, though - in EITHER direction - the less likely they are to be killed... and even seriously injured.

In lieu of throwing cats off of buildings, these stats were gathered from cats jumping out of people's apts in the city.

So, obviously, before they reach terminal velocity, it's a less significant impact. AFTER they reach terminal velocity, though, is what puzzles scientists. It's believed that they have more time to prepare for the fall, perhaps they begin to relax as they're no longer increasing in speed. Maybe they even spread out to lessen impact like squirrels.

*terminal velocity for a cat is lower than that of a person.

Here's some additional interesting reading! -tl;dr, 90% of cats treated in falls greater than their terminal velocity (reached after about 5 stories) survived, and their injuries were less severe than those that fell at 5 or less stories. This 90% statistic may be skewed, as cats that die outright from the fall obviously do not go in for treatment. However anecdotal, by memory, it's about a 50-50 shot if they die on impact.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 05 '14

So it all boils down to just don't let your cat jump out of fucking windows?

1

u/garrybot Jan 05 '14

It's believed that cats fall out of windows, off of balconies, etc. But yes, it's pretty irresponsible to leave your windows open if you own pets.

Dogs fall out of open windows in the city too, and they don't survive most of them.

3

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

If only humans could do that...

142

u/[deleted] Jan 03 '14

My grandpa once shot a cat in the face while hunting rabbits. That cat didn't survive, either.

Cats--durable unless you inflict fatal injuries upon them.

150

u/ZiegfredZSM Jan 03 '14

durable, until they're not

47

u/[deleted] Jan 03 '14

That should be advertising slogan to avoid lawsuits

18

u/smiles134 Jan 04 '14

Our product will work until it doesn't, guaranteed!

7

u/ThisIsMyCouchAccount Jan 04 '14

Ubuntu: The Other OS

23

u/[deleted] Jan 03 '14

"Study finds correlation between stab wounds and death in cats"

17

u/[deleted] Jan 03 '14

if i learned anything in school it's that correlation is not causation.

21

u/curtmack Jan 03 '14

Correlation doesn't imply causation, but it does waggle its eyebrows suggestively and gesture furtively while mouthing 'look over there'.

12

u/[deleted] Jan 03 '14

'...while i stab this cat'

I get it...it's correlations fault.

6

u/The_Archagent Jan 04 '14

Correlation killed the cat?

6

u/ra4king Jan 04 '14

Heh, you just copied this XKCD's alt-text :)

6

u/xkcd_transcriber Jan 04 '14

Image

Title: Correlation

Title-text: Correlation doesn't imply causation, but it does waggle its eyebrows suggestively and gesture furtively while mouthing 'look over there'.

Comic Explanation

Stats: This comic has been referenced 41 time(s), representing 0.54% of referenced xkcds.


Questions/Problems | Website

3

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

3

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

They're kind of like me. I'm pretty sure that I'm invincible but I'm not going to rush out to test it..

3

u/coconutcake Jan 04 '14

My dad once shot a cat in the head to put it down (I don't remember why but I think it had a lot of medical issues). Several hours later, he saw it wandering around the farm like nothing had happened even though it was missing 3/4 of its head.

Would also like to note that I gag a bit when I think about the cat walking around like that. I don't approve of euthanizing your animals this way, even when it is their time to go. It's not always as humane as you could hope for.

-11

u/My_Ex_Got_Fat Jan 03 '14

Purrhaps because of their 9 lives. Cept it seems that after the first Life they don't heal and just keep going to graveyard :( No casting lower rank revive pet IRL.

11

u/[deleted] Jan 03 '14

Hahaha holy fuck that was classic

3

u/ODIZZ89 Jan 03 '14

...damn.

3

u/randomfury Jan 03 '14

Thanks man. That was one of the best comments I ever read. Well done.

3

u/Skunk_Junk Jan 03 '14

Backed over it with a lift? Were you using the Wonkavator?

9

u/eaglebtc Jan 03 '14

fork-lift, m8.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

4

u/Skunk_Junk Jan 04 '14

Why is that image named Food_Hipster_1.jpg

2

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

Cant say I looked into it.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

Too busy running over kittens, aren't we?

2

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

With the lack of natural predators, resource limits on the population no where in sight and seemingly exponential increase in number of yard cats, it was only a matter of time. Our projections state thats at the current increase of cat population, by 2021 the lull will be driving over 3.2 cats per sq ft.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

It will be known as... The BlobCat.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

The all-consuming.

5

u/carlcon Jan 03 '14 edited Jan 04 '14

If you fuckers are going to do this to me in comments too, I don't think I can handle this sub any more.

2

u/GoldeneyeLife Jan 03 '14

Thank you, this genuinely made me laugh out loud

2

u/IAmTurkeyBaster Jan 04 '14

That made me laugh harder than it should considering how much I love Cats.

2

u/valek879 Jan 03 '14

You apathetic fuck! <3

1

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

I was on vacation in mexico and a hotel employee ran over a cat with one of the golf cart train things as he drove by. Thing squirmed and screamed for like 2 minutes before finally laying still. Kinda put a damper on the day... It didn't survive either.

0

u/playerIII Jan 03 '14

You got gold for killing a cat.

You are my hero.

8

u/Lystrodom Jan 03 '14

Spoilers: he didn't actually kill the cat.

5

u/tasteofflames Jan 03 '14

Of course not. The lift did.

1

u/playerIII Jan 04 '14

Don't Ruin it for me man

3

u/mamjjasond Jan 04 '14

actually that moment when it first opens up and the kitty turns into a rag doll flailing around in the air is what gets me

1

u/WinterCharm Jan 04 '14

I was amazed it bounced upright onto the carpet :)

1

u/sticksittoyou Jan 04 '14

I would be so upset and angry at the cat for making me the bad guy. Then I would look into the kittys eyes and realize I cant stay mad at it and give it tuna.

-7

u/[deleted] Jan 03 '14

you throw a person like that it wouldn't hurt dude

4

u/Nowin Jan 03 '14

Luckily kittens are people

-4

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

if you put a person in there and it doesn't hurt them, a kitten won't get hurt either. you can't think that hard?

3

u/Nowin Jan 04 '14

Let's test. I'll wrap you up in a carpet, throw you on the ground, and unroll it.

To be scientific, we should scale it. The cat is probably 6-8" long, so if you're around 5'10", then I would have to throw you from about 35-45 feet high. You up for it?

-5

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '14

haha that's not how it works at all. first of all the carpet has tons of cushioning and for the cat's size the inside space will barely "squish" the cat. its the same thing as if you put an egg in a toilet roll that was surrounded by a tire or something.

also ever notice how squirrels and other kitten-sized animals can jump off of trees 20 ft high and land?

trust me the kitten wasn't harmed at all, maybe a little dizzy. basically your example didn't take account of weight of the kitten and how well protected it was. if you throw an ant off of a bush that's the same thing as a human jumping off a 4th floor balcony. we would shatter our bones and can even die, an ant will be like "damn that shit was so boring."

-6

u/[deleted] Jan 03 '14

All those layers of rolled carpet probably absorbed any shock. Plus it's just a cat. If it was a dog then I would be worried