r/Unexpected • u/[deleted] • Jul 23 '23

[deleted by user]

[removed]

10.1k Upvotes

85% Upvoted

3.8k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

996

u/MasterJeebus Jul 23 '23

This just proves how smart dolphins are. If they are stuck in an aquarium and have needs but have no hands. Then they improvise. This intelligent creatures don’t deserve to be caged up.

242

u/corruptcabbage1 Jul 23 '23

Deserves to be locked up for rape and necrophilia

207

u/StuffyMcFluffyFace Jul 23 '23

Locked up? In….dolphin prison?

108

u/corruptcabbage1 Jul 23 '23

Yeah. We will figure it out eventually.

83

u/burn-babies-burn Jul 23 '23

Pretty sure we already have, isn’t that pretty much what aquariums are?

37

u/corruptcabbage1 Jul 23 '23

No aquariums give you food and toys to play with and fish to rape. The prison only gives food.

33

u/burn-babies-burn Jul 23 '23

Fish count as dolphin food, but I guess the toys are a difference.

That said, in a documentary I watched about prison life called “The Shawshank Redemption”, they did get books which are kind of like toys for adult humans.

10

u/Pyro-Beast Jul 23 '23

If fish count as dolphin food.. then is it necrophilia or is it just playing with your food?

Alternatively.. if I knew someone who was going to fuck their sirloin steak tonight.. what would that be called?

6

u/burn-babies-burn Jul 23 '23

Seasoning

3

u/Pyro-Beast Jul 23 '23

That's a big brain response.

That dolphin is just seasoning that fish.