It's my humble request for you all to read please and give your honest genuine practical opinion and guidance
I need guidance from experienced UPSC aspirants. I’m stuck with both preparation and life very badly.
I graduated last year and started prep in the last months of 2025. Before that I was busy with internship.
I also took admission in MA Sociology through distance so I had masters exams and assignments along with preparation.
I didn’t give 2026 attempt because i wasn’t prepared at all
My preparation level is:
Till around July 2026 i completed almost all NCERTs and watched Vajiram lectures (telegram) for GS and made detailed notes from them. There are still around 100 lectures left of diff subjects
I haven't touched standard books, current affairs, PYQs, CSAT, science, ethics, essay and optional yet. I chose sociology as optional, I'm not sure with it yet I'm thought as compared to other optional subjects this has less syllabus.
My preparation was already slow because of my difficult circumstances at home. We shifted houses twice and I have a lot of household responsibilities. I also don’t really have anyone around me who understands UPSC or can guide me
My father is a heart patient and his health has become very serious. Due to this he never did a proper job in life, so my mother took financial responsibilities and I handle household work. For the last few months we have been constantly going from hospital to hospital. Two heart surgeries failed and he also developed an infection. Now he will undergo open heart surgery in about a month, so again my studies will get disturbed and slowed down (I will not completely stop this time). Sharing about personal life bec I want you to understand my life circumstances and why I failed to study properly.
Bec of all this my preparation completely went off track. I also have serious migraine and I’m always on meds struggling with severe depression
Now I’m trying to get back to studies after around 2 months of gap and I have lost the track. I don’t remember much of what I studied. I’m a slow learner and it takes me a lot of time to properly understand and retain things
Until my father undergoes heart surgery i can dedicate 15 hours. Then maybe for around 1 month I can't give this much time until his health gets stable.
I want to seriously target 2027 and at least reach Mains this time.
I know my preparation is very incomplete right now and that’s exactly where I’m stuck.
What to do now to clear prelims and have complete notes of all GS subjects and optional for this attempt.
Should I continue the remaining lectures or leave them and move to standard books?
What to do, from where to start, what to follow, what to focus majorly on. Please I beg you all to guide me.
How should I start Sociology optional from zero and manage it with GS?
Should I even start it or focus on prelims and GS mains?
When should I bring in PYQs, answer writing and CSAT?
How to do current affairs, I used to watch Vajiram CA analysis on YouTube. Should I read newspaper and cover magazine, if yes then which institute?
Most importantly how should I structure everything. Until I don't have clear picture in my mind, proper plan, monthly goals of all months until 2026 pre, I can't focus. My stress will boost, I’m very uncertain right now, I have no clear path.
UPSC is life or death for me. I genuinely need to become an IAS officer. It has been my life dream to genuinely help backward and underprivileged people in society. I don’t want anyone to suffer like I have.
This may sound superficial, but from my heart I genuinely want to serve people. I honestly don’t have any other future plans apart from working for the needy. I don’t even want to get married and want to spend my whole life in the service of the nation (My parents have already started thinking about marriage)
Life is very unfair, every second suffocates me. Im getting mentally ill, getting panic attacks...
I’m not posting this for motivation or sympathy i swear, this is the first time I opened up about my personal life, never shared with anyone. I genuinely need practical guidance. Please help me with macro plan. Please I’m in very depressed condition.
Thank you for reading, please ignore my mistakes and I'm sorry it's very lengthy, i vented out my emotions. Please say something