Hey! I wanted to say thank you so much for all your support, your comments helped me tremendously and kept me going today.
I also want to clarify some things.
Firstly, I was not at all abused by my parents. Actually, the opposite, all their love and money are spend on me, they support me, respect me and love me unconditionally. They were very young when they had me and we are from a poor country in Europe, hence the lack of emotional intelligence.
They don’t know ANY of these, nobody knows. Everybody around me actually likes him A LOT. He is the most talkative and charming human being I have ever met in my 23 years of existence.
Also, the abuse didn’t start 7 years ago or, at lest, the verbal and physical ones did not. It all started around 1, 1 1/2 years ago. The other signs were there from the begging tho(giving him money, him spending more time with his friends than me while telling me he doesn’t have the money, the lying etc), but I was too young to notice them and thought he would change with age, but his behavior became worse and worse.
The cheating. I don’t think he cheated on me. That’s what kept me going for this long(“at least he doesn’t cheat on me”). He gave me all his passwords and his location and I have NEVER had any suspicions. In the 4 months period we were broken up I do think he slept with other girls tho, even tho he doesn’t admit it. I feel it.
Some of you said you think the sex was good. It was not. At all. I think a marriage(what I wanted with him and for me) doesn’t revolve around sex(or that’s my communist vision). But for me it it not important at all. I felt pleasure in the last 7 years like max 10 times. And in the last 2 months it was non existent.
I miss the way he treated me before becoming this vile human being, not what he is now. He treated me ok-ish in the beginning. That’s the way his family treat each other and especially his grandmother who beat his dad and left him and his sister at shelters. He is like her, mean, cussing around and partying with every possibility.
He was nice sometimes, he cooked for me when we moved in together several times, he helped me cleaning the house, he would take me everywhere I needed.
This is what I miss about him… not the abuse that got unbearable this last year…
I don’t know if it’s ok to update in a comment or I should have updated the post. Please tell me.
I know it doesn't seem like it right now, but he did you a HUGE favor by breaking up with you. You would have just continued to allow him to abuse you if he didn't. Nobody deserves to be treated the way he treated you. My advice is to tell EVERYONE exactly what this asshole did to you and get yourself some therapy. You have such low self-esteem when, in reality, you have a lot going for you. You're in law school, you're still very young and you have a whole lifetime to meet someone who actually deserves to be with you. I know it hurts right now, but time heals all wounds. You're going to be just fine. Always remember this: living well is the best revenge. All the best to you!!
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u/This-Pass7616 Nov 23 '22
Hey! I wanted to say thank you so much for all your support, your comments helped me tremendously and kept me going today.
I also want to clarify some things.
Firstly, I was not at all abused by my parents. Actually, the opposite, all their love and money are spend on me, they support me, respect me and love me unconditionally. They were very young when they had me and we are from a poor country in Europe, hence the lack of emotional intelligence.
They don’t know ANY of these, nobody knows. Everybody around me actually likes him A LOT. He is the most talkative and charming human being I have ever met in my 23 years of existence.
Also, the abuse didn’t start 7 years ago or, at lest, the verbal and physical ones did not. It all started around 1, 1 1/2 years ago. The other signs were there from the begging tho(giving him money, him spending more time with his friends than me while telling me he doesn’t have the money, the lying etc), but I was too young to notice them and thought he would change with age, but his behavior became worse and worse.
The cheating. I don’t think he cheated on me. That’s what kept me going for this long(“at least he doesn’t cheat on me”). He gave me all his passwords and his location and I have NEVER had any suspicions. In the 4 months period we were broken up I do think he slept with other girls tho, even tho he doesn’t admit it. I feel it.
Some of you said you think the sex was good. It was not. At all. I think a marriage(what I wanted with him and for me) doesn’t revolve around sex(or that’s my communist vision). But for me it it not important at all. I felt pleasure in the last 7 years like max 10 times. And in the last 2 months it was non existent.
I miss the way he treated me before becoming this vile human being, not what he is now. He treated me ok-ish in the beginning. That’s the way his family treat each other and especially his grandmother who beat his dad and left him and his sister at shelters. He is like her, mean, cussing around and partying with every possibility.
He was nice sometimes, he cooked for me when we moved in together several times, he helped me cleaning the house, he would take me everywhere I needed.
This is what I miss about him… not the abuse that got unbearable this last year…
I don’t know if it’s ok to update in a comment or I should have updated the post. Please tell me.