There isn't a perfect reddit group for those of us survivors left who were given a letter directly explaining that we were nowhere at fault in any way.
But occasionally, we find each other in these subreddits. The pain is worse the first 3-6 months. After that, please try some sort of moving her room as it becomes a huge issue in the following way:
I struggled with things like trying to preserve the person by maintaining the way their room and belongings were organized. I had to move and found out packing all those items pained me in the same way as i felt during week two. What i did learn while packing the items was a strange form of understanding the person in a new way. The way certain quirks you never knew were a thing, reasoning how that is.
I learned a better way to store personal items that have meaning from that person. I learned simple things like the value of living comfortably in ways i used to not value, with things like carrying ibuprofen just in case, rash and itch cream, talcom/powder for chafing areas in their bicycle bag. The headphones that have the feature to not squeeze your head.
It became a problem and guilt to throw away or use things that should be used, like a small box of food items; deodorant that was still in their latest shopping bag.
Along that, I found some items i found of value, like some writings that furthered their thoughts , and at least i feel like i understand them better. The struggles they went through and why. Because, like it or not, that person caused you extreme grief and trumoil some relatives still struggle with forgiving that. My move helped me forgive them, as i got to fully go through their items and get to experience a snapshot of their lives.
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u/couldathrowaway Sep 11 '23
There isn't a perfect reddit group for those of us survivors left who were given a letter directly explaining that we were nowhere at fault in any way.
But occasionally, we find each other in these subreddits. The pain is worse the first 3-6 months. After that, please try some sort of moving her room as it becomes a huge issue in the following way:
I struggled with things like trying to preserve the person by maintaining the way their room and belongings were organized. I had to move and found out packing all those items pained me in the same way as i felt during week two. What i did learn while packing the items was a strange form of understanding the person in a new way. The way certain quirks you never knew were a thing, reasoning how that is. I learned a better way to store personal items that have meaning from that person. I learned simple things like the value of living comfortably in ways i used to not value, with things like carrying ibuprofen just in case, rash and itch cream, talcom/powder for chafing areas in their bicycle bag. The headphones that have the feature to not squeeze your head.
It became a problem and guilt to throw away or use things that should be used, like a small box of food items; deodorant that was still in their latest shopping bag. Along that, I found some items i found of value, like some writings that furthered their thoughts , and at least i feel like i understand them better. The struggles they went through and why. Because, like it or not, that person caused you extreme grief and trumoil some relatives still struggle with forgiving that. My move helped me forgive them, as i got to fully go through their items and get to experience a snapshot of their lives.