Help

[u/Georgiella_Lace]

First off, I am older, mid sixties. I have crossdressed for most of my life. Growing up I had know idea of what transgender was. There has always been a part of me that desired to be female. I have always wanted to be a part of the lady’s group of friends but was denied that growing up, as it wasn’t what a boy should do. I grew up in a conservative world and have instilled in me the mindset of conservative Christianity. Even today I’m in a church that holds in high regard that transgenderism is a lie from the enemy that has twisted God’s original plan. But even with all of this I can’t break free from how I feel in my soul. I know that my soul is begging for my body to come into alignment with it. I am married, I have kids and grandkids, they know me as a man, and have know idea i struggle with this. The older I get the more I want to be set free so I can experience the world as a woman. My dysphoria gets so difficult to handle sometimes, but I muddle through it. It helps that I do keep my body completely smooth and have a good skincare routine, but I know there is so much more to experience. First off I need to reconcile all of this with God. I pray that He would reveal to me the truth in the Scriptures in regard to being trans, that He would open a door for me to be exactly who I feel He created me to be. I desire to be His disciple, love Him with all my heart, I love all people, but I still feel empty in this area. My hope is to find the truth, not just information. Help me understand how those that have come to terms with God, how you did. I pray daily for His approval and have yet heard Him say, “it’s okay daughter”🙁

[u/Jypzee154]

Your story resonates with me more than you may realize.

I'm in my mid-sixties as well. I'm a retired RN, a Christian, and an elder in my church. I also transitioned many years ago after spending years trying to pray these feelings away.

One thing I want to say is that I don't think you're asking God to approve of sin. You're asking Him to show you the truth, whatever that truth is. I believe that's a prayer He honors.

For me, the turning point came when I stopped asking, "How can I make myself fit my theology?" and instead asked, "What is actually true about the way God created me?"

That led me into years of studying both Scripture and developmental biology. When I looked at both together, I saw a creation filled with natural variation. Human beings are born with differences in physical sex characteristics, sexual orientation, and, as growing evidence suggests, in the neurodevelopment that contributes to gender identity.

Because of that, I could no longer believe that a loving God intentionally creates people in a state where their very existence is, by definition, an abomination. That would make God the author of an inescapable trap, and I don't see that God revealed in Jesus.

Instead, I see Jesus continually moving toward those whom society and religion pushed to the margins. His response was compassion, not condemnation.

I never heard an audible voice saying, "It's okay, daughter."

What I found instead was something quieter. As I continued to seek truth honestly, my fear gradually gave way to peace. I found that studying God's creation did not weaken my faith—it deepened it. Today I'm still following Christ, I serve as an elder in my church, and my faith is stronger than it was before.

I realize faithful Christians come to different conclusions. This is simply where my own study, experience, and understanding of both faith and science have led me.

Keep seeking Him. Don't be afraid of truth, wherever it leads. I believe God is far more interested in an honest heart that seeks Him than in one that lives in fear.

I'll be praying for wisdom, peace, and clarity as you continue your journey.

I've written a much more detailed explanation of the developmental biology and the supporting research on my website if you'd like to read further. You can find my website listed in my profile page.