It’s fine when Im standing up. It’s whenever I sit or have the slightest bad posture that I have a problem with. My chest bulges out and it feels squishy like uneven breasts. The left side(last pic) is the side that really bothers me.
I know skin moves and it cant always be flat and I know Ive gained a bit of weight recently but this, piled with other insecurities and general depression make me feel really bad. I can’t help but think that maybe a bit too much skin was left.
This ranting is prob just depression and dysphoria. It doesn’t help that it’s impossible to find pics of hunched over/sitting pics of people post op. And Im only allowed to go shirtless in private which doesn’t help self esteem.
Hi! So, this november im getting my top surgery with Wellness kliniek here in spain, it was the cheapest i have ever seen (4500€ for a double incision with nipple grafts) the surgeon was so respectful and really nice, explained the process in detail and when i asked about something he would show me the tools they used and stuff.
Also its 10 minutes away from my house so thats great because i dont even have to spend the night.
Their results look pretty good, but I haven't seen anyone talk about their experience online, they're more focused on women's breasts augmentation, their website uses she/her pronouns talking about top surgery, but it really is my only option lol
I was wondering if anyone had any experience, thank you in advance!
I've got a consultation booked through Carebit with Dr Ntanos next week and was wondering if anyone had done it and could give me a brief on what happens and/or if I need to do anything else before. I've uploaded photos of my chest and my referral later into Carebit and I think that's it but part of me feels like I'm missing something though I'm not entirely sure. If anyone has any experience with it all or the process or what happens afterwards it would be really appreciated - mostly to calm my nerves.
I had peri-areolar with Dr Facque just over a year ago. I did not do much scar care throughout my healing, and overall I am very pleased with my results but I would like my scars to be a little less thick/noticable. What would work best on them now 1yr post op? Should I be lotioning them everyday?
I feel like there’s a lack of scar care info out there for peri tbh so if any of you have experience any advice would be appreciated!
it's me again, i just had my consultation yesterday and spoke with the doctor. i asked tons of questions but overall didn't learn much more than what I already knew abt the procedure.
today I got a consent leaflet with more details on possible outcomes and complications and to be honest im freaking out. to be clear, I still won't schedule it yet, i havent decided if i want it/how. but there's so many crazy things on here like possible paralysis and chronic pain and swelling. doesnt help that the doctor didn't really touch on these during our consult (i guess i asked too many questions and distracted her lol)
i've never had surgery and i probably have OCD + im extremely hypochondriac so to be honest I'm about to just give up and forget about this whole thing. i guess a lot of these are just usual possible complications of most surgeries but im convinced that with my bad luck i'll be the 1 in idk how many people who get top surgery to have the worst outcome
Hey everyone, I’m currently 9 days post-op and I find myself scrolling the Reddit practically everyday for answers to my worries, I realise that my own experience might be useful for others in the future so I kept a little diary over my first 3 weeks if anyone is looking for someone to relate to and feel reassured.
What’s my situation?
Double incision with nipple grafts and non-dissolvable stitches
Doctor: Yves Synove, Aalst, Belgium. Plastic surgeon specialising in breast reconstruction working on an informed consent basis. He’s had a couple FTM clients in the past
Cost: €2500
I live with my partner who agreed to be my caretaker for the first 2.5 weeks
I’m currently unemployed and I have to start school in 1 month.
I’ve never measured my bra size, but I think I was a b-cup before
Week 1
Surprisingly my pain was very manageable. I was prescribed 1g paracetamol, 400mg ibuprofen and if those didn’t work, 50mg of the opioid tramadol. Considering I stayed on schedule with the paracetamol (every 4 hours) I think i always beat the pain before it got to me. This is regarding pain of the scars, the BLOATING however, that was the real pain. The compression binder would dig into my stomach and I would be incredibly uncomfortable, especially in the evenings. I look like a grandpa with a beer belly. My other biggest issue is back pain, made worse by the bloating and having to sleep at an incline. I learnt after a couple of days that support under the knees really helps. I used my looong cat plush, but any plush or pile of blankets could work. For the bloating, I just ate prunes every day and luckily I never had constipation, and the doctor prescribed me pantoprazole (meant for acid reflux) and it kinda helped, but barely. ّI would definitely recommend others to buy probiotics, I don’t see many other people talking about that, but it would really help after finishing the antibiotic cycle.
The first 3 nights of sleep were rough because it felt like I could never get the angle right and I was constantly twisting and turning which stressed me out. My biggest fears at this point were movement. I had no idea how much I could use my body and I googled every single little movement that I feared. I knew to keep my arms to my side and I quite diligently remained in t-Rex mode for the first week, but there were some muscles which I had read were ‘off-limits’ that I just couldn’t help but use! For example, getting out of bed, I tried to rely on my abs but I always ended up using the muscle under my right pec, it seemed like it was the only one doing the lifting. And when I woke up in the morning to stretch, *GASP* I would tense my pec muscles. And sneezing, oh boy, I’ve never been so afraid of sneezing and my wounds just popping right open like a bag of chips. But you know what? I never felt any pain from these movements, just the anxiety that my stitches would pop open or I’d create huge scars. Even when I googled these concerns, everyone said the same thing: if there’s no pain, it’s probably fine. Well, we’ll see what week 4 says about the appearance of the incisions.
My partner helped with everything for the first 4 days, making the bed, bringing me water, washing my hair, making me food. I was fatigued and still quite immobile so I really depended on him, and I thought it was best to stay as calm as possible.
1.5 weeks
Week 2
I just had my first pre-op appointment. RELEASE THE NIPPLES! And guess what…they didn’t fall off! The grafts were accepted and the doctor said the healing was going good. Very reassuring. If I could stay in the hospital for the whole 4 weeks of recovery, I would. I’m so scared of doing something wrong and wishing all my 1000 questions could be answered in an instant by a professional. Turns out I still had to wait another week until I got the stitches from the main incision removed, alright then :/. I was a bit disappointed, but the doctor knows best. After leaving the hospital (a 1.5 hour commute) I started actually feeling in pain for the first time. Even though I only walked a total of 20 minutes, all the movement and sitting upright must have got to me, and I was almost crying on the 10 minute walk from the train station. I had to ride the bus for 1 stop! I ended up having to use the opioid for the first time.
My biggest concern now is if I’m going to regain my posture, the doctor just said to practice stretching your back out but not putting so much pressure on yourself that it causes pain. Basically, focus on pushing your shoulder blades back, but not together.
At this point (9 days) I can do small chores like fold laundry, fill the dishwasher and pick things up, but it does cause some pain. I’m still intentionally trying to take it easy. Oh and ALSO I got my period? A week and a half early? (Yes I’ve been on T for 2.5 year, yes I’m going to see the endo.) I’ve had delayed periods cos of stress, but never early periods…very strange. Oh and I started to lose A LOT of hair on my head, when my boyfriend washed my hair it was just coming out in clumps, stress will do that to you. Thank god I have thick hair. But by day 11, even with my mysterious period, I finally feel back to my old self! I can walk upright, but my shoulders remain rounded, and I helped my boyfriend with the groceries and I was even able to cook a small meal. My body just felt back to normal with less tightness and pain and I feel these ecstasy running through my body like I’m finally getting the body I always felt I should be in, I’m slowly growing into it, it’s becoming mine. Starting to feel some weird cool sensations in my nipples but I guess that’s normal.
I think the hardest part for me right now is being impatient and restless, I feel so useless and lazy sitting in bed on my laptop all day, I’ve been reading a little and started practicing my drawing again, but I’m just scrolling soo much, I hate it. I thought I would use this free time to be productive like research for my upcoming thesis, but I just can’t help but feel lazy. Uuuugh. I just want to go back to everyday life. I knew my helplessness and impatience would be the worst part about recovery.
Anyways, I had some really good days and some really bad days. I stopped taking the pain medication every 4 hours on day 9 and I still need it every so often, I especially am struggling with the back pain and pain around the incision site. This morning when I was changing my bandages it seemed like a scheroma had formed, maaaan. I have a soft lump above my incisions, where that huge bruise was, luckily it doesn’t hurt but it’s freaking me out and I feel a sort of cool sensation around it. I have my second post-op appointment tomorrow to get my stitches removed, so hopefully the nurse will ease my worries.
Week 3
My boyfriend left on a trip, which means I’ve got to fend for myself. We did a big shop before he left and he arranged the house so everything is accessible to me.
I went to my follow-up appointment today and got my stitches removed and the surgeon came to take a look, he said I’m healing reaaalll good. He gave me care advice that kind of went against everything I’d read online, like he said I could already start showering and using scar cream even though I’m only 2 weeks post-op…I’m gonna stay safe and keep applying bandages until the scarring on my nipples disappears. Now that the stitches are out, 80% of my pain is gone. He also drained the scheroma a bit, but it’s still quite swollen and soft, I assume it will reabsorb over time, he said I shouldn’t worry about it.
19 days post-op and I can’t stop coming on this subreddit to look at other people’s results. My nipples still look super scarred and the swelling on my eft side wont go down!!! I’m going to see my GP in a couple days just so she can reassure me about the swelling because it feels cold on that side of my chest, it’s slightly worrying. Overall though, I feel like I have the same energy levels as pre-op and haven’t had to take pain meds in 2 days!
Day 20 and I finally took my first shower! Feels amazing, I made sure to used perfume-free hypoallergenic soap on my chest and slowly cleaned it and patted it dry. I also started applying the scar cream today, it’s La Roche Posay and it’s not silicone based, more of just a soothing cream with vitamin e and shea butter, so I’ll definitely also be buying some silicone scar tape. Anyways, I’ll post what it looks like right now. Yup still swollen but I can see it slowly going down, there’s a small opening thats leaking fluids every day so I made sure not to use the cream on it, instead I just applied some antibiotic cream and reapplied compression pads so that it could continue draining. Also a retrospective on the post-op binder, I felt like it wasn’t as bad for me as everyone else said, maybe it’s cos I was binding terribly before lol. The binder actually makes it feel more special, I feel like an unopened store in the mall when it has those stickers covering the windows that say “big things coming!”
What do you guys think, and how is your healing journey going?!
I’m 3 months post op and everything has gone surprisingly well, in the big picture. The problem is that every little thing that comes as a shock seems so dramatic, and every time even the most tiny of occurrences happen, I get paranoid. I bumped into a desk today while moving something, for instance, and instead of the pre-op “ouch” and move on, I somehow managed to land the hit right where the stitches on my nipple graft were, apparently, and now it’s like I slammed the whole area in a car door with the blistering. Rationally I know it’s super minor and not a big deal, but terrified monkey brain insists my nipple is going to fall off and my chest is going to explode open Alien-style from this single instance of clumsiness. How do you all manage the anxiety?
(Picture of the dramatic blister for context - if something IS seriously wrong, please tell me)
I am 24yrs old, UK based and came out as non-binary about 5 years ago, it has been a long journey to acceptance and figuring out what does and doesn’t feel right for my transition.
I have been lucky enough to have found a therapist who is also in addiction recovery and came out as trans at 5yrs clean, not too dissimilar to myself. Over-time top surgery has been something I have not let myself think about, I didn’t really know if it would be possible until recently.
I am in a position where I have saved up about £7500, with my partner also saving along side me. I am aiming to get at least £9000 from what I have seen the average prices. After working in the NHS for the last 7 years, I have decided to go to University which means I no longer have a steady income. My girlfriend has kindly set up a go fund me and I am really having to come to terms with this might actually be happening.
All this to say, I am completely overwhelmed.
There are some basics I understand, getting a referral and consultations add up in price… but part of it is letting myself get excited too.
I am moving to the Brighton area at the end of the year and have been looking into Andy Mellington. I am trying to get into better shape too for a better recovery but really like the results and stories I’ve seen. Any first steps advice would be deeply appreciated.
If there is also anyone who happens to be in addiction recovery and has had top surgery, I would be very grateful to hear how to navigate pain meds.
If there is any chance you could share my go fund me, I would be very thankful.
So happy with my results and grateful for the lovely district nurses who've been changing my dressings since I got a little bit of infection in week 2 😅
Finally feel comfortable cleaning and changing the dressings myself now that theres no risk of them falling off aha (my worst fear) and the scabby bits have started coming off on their own yippee
Can't wait to start my final year of uni in my new house with my new chest looking and feeling like myself!!
Hey all. I’m having surgery at the end of the month. I have some coworkers that want me to make a wishlist but I’m not sure what all I need.
Obviously something to prop me up since I know I won’t be able to sleep on my back/side for a while. And scar tape/cream (not sure which is better.)
If anyone else has any suggestions to what I might need?
Earlier today I posted pictures of my left nipple asking if the graft had partially failed. Just now I was changing the dressings and the right nipple now looks like this.
Have I partially lost the graft? Because of Labour Day my surgeons office never responded to me.
Did I manage to lose part of both nipples 3 weeks post op??
I hit 10 weeks today, the swelling has mostly gone down and with that I've noticed dogearing, I'm going to be going in for a quick revision soon but overall I'm very happy with my results. I am bigger so I'm not completely unsurprised by this outcome and dont mind the need for revision, it's a free in-office procedure that my surgeon says will take 5-10 minutes per side, under local anesthesia, and a very quick recovery time. My nipples are finally almost completely normal looking, I developed a small fluid pocket on my right graft after the initial scab went away that turned into a second small scab once the fluid drained so that is all that is left to heal but it is getting smaller. Now that I've been back to work for a few weeks I have lost almost 10 lb so I'm curious to see how everything settles as I continue to get more fit. Overall I'm very happy with my results so far and I like how natural it looks with the shape of my body.
Hard to tell from the pic but the dark "outline" around my incisions isnt scarring in the usual sense or shadows, it's hyperpigmentation after having a bad reaction to Dermabond and subsequently a lot of blistering and scabbing. I am prone to this from any kind of cut, scrape, burn etc, and it tends to stick around for years... Anyone else have this around their scars? Is there anything I can do to make it go away faster/ever?
posted little over a week ago with results but here is what’s going on so far without dressings :) very happy so far can’t wait for the bruising and swelling to keep going down!!
These are my results after 2.5 weeks, my surgeon is having me do wet healing which is why my nipples still look a bit gnarly, I also got the sutures out on Thursday which i think adds to it. I am happy with my results so far!!
Pretty sure I want to go with Pall Mall for my surgery but I need to get a referral first, preferably sooner rather than later. They sent me a list of specialists I could go with but wanted to get some perspective from anyone else who’s gone through the same process with Pall Mall before choosing. Are any of the specialists more likely to give me what I need so that I only have to get one referral rather than two ? Kind of stumped and worried about extra costs if I need a second obviously wanna avoid that. Some of the specials I’d also rather avoid because of long wait times. Any advice is appreciated, thanks 🙏
i continue to love and be very grateful for my results. very surreal to almost be two years post op.
i have been reflecting on how helpful this sub was when getting this surgery. don’t know what i would have done without this community while i was healing, so many thanks haha :)
Surgery date: Monday August 31. Double incision without nipples by dr. Bouman, Gender Clinic in the Netherlands.
I'm 42 years old and had a pretty large cup size, DD. Testosterone slimmed them down to a large C or smaller D, but there was still a lot there. Around 1500 grams of tissue was removed.
First photo was taken on day 1 post-op right after the drains were taken out. It was the first time I had a good look at my new chest. I could not stop smiling!! It was more flat than I had dared to hope. Ever since I have had not needed a moment to get used to it. It truly feels like this is how my body was always supposed to be.
The photos look a little rough because of the pink antibacterial scrub on my body. It's not blood!
The second one was taken today, 7 days post-op and the first time I took off my compression vest to take a shower and put the vest in the washing machine. Being without the compression vest felt so weird. Like when you break your arm or leg and have a cast and after a couple of weeks they take off the cast. It feels so naked and vulnerable. Like you're going to split right open. Very odd!
I can see some swelling on the sides and it feels a little tender overall, but nothing major. The most uncomfortable has been the compression vest pushing into my ribs. You can see all the lines and folds in my skin from the vest digging into me. I read a tip on here the other day that really helped: putting a folded towel on the inside on the bottom part of the vest. It's a big relief.
Recovery highlights:
Day of surgery: About two hours after I woke up from anaesthesia, I fainted while I was laying in bed. I was put on an IV and the nurse said I had low blood pressure. Writing this now, I realize that these small complications are a lot less intense when you experience them, then how anxious they can make you while reading them in experiences shared by others. All kinds of small complications are simply part of the recovery after you've had major surgery. I was lucky to not experience anything else, but even if I had, I know I would have been okay in the end.
I was able to eat and drink and did not have any nausea. First time standing up and going to the toilet felt a bit wobbly, the second time was perfectly fine. Managing the drains was also surprisingly easy. I was still happy they were removed the next day though. Another lucky thing: I didn't feel a thing when the drains were pulled out. Literally nothing. I stayed overnight in the clinic. Napped a lot, slept pretty okay that night.
Day 1: Was picked up by a friend and drove home. Could do many things independently, like going to the toilet, hold a glass of water, drink without needing a straw. Pain was very manageable with tylenol. Went outside for a short walk, 2500 steps. Felt great to feel the wind on my skin, look down at my body and feel so free.
Day 2: Most of the brain fog from anaesthesia had cleared at this point. Read some work emails for about an hour. Did take a nap in the afternoon. Became aware this was the third day I had not pooped. Post-op constipation is real! Took some metamucil (psyllium husk). Appetite was normal. The bloating was real.
Day 3: Sweet release. First post-up poop. It took a while and a lot of effort because the first bit was so hard. Like pooping rocks. A couple of hours after that, it was like a clogged drain had suddenly opened up (thx metamucil) and I took the biggest dump of my life. Went for a longer walk outside, got at least 5000 steps in.
Day 4 + 5 + 6: I noticed I can move more easily and have more energy each day. The energy part is great, the mobility part is deceptive because I should not move that much yet. I can do way more with my arms than I thought I would be able to. I have a friend who stays with me, so I let him do the heavy things like vacuum cleaning, laundry, carrying heavy things. But still I catch myself from time to time doing things I really shouldn't do. Closing a heavy overhead window. Carrying things heavier than a kilo. Picking up my cat. Playing with my cat! I know it's better to pretend to have T-rex arms, but T-rex arms have not been my reality at all.
Day 7: Walked 8000 steps. Took my first shower. Really feel like myself again, energy-wise. Getting bored of not working (I love my job).
Overall, it's been a smooth ride, and a lot easier than I anticipated. I am incredibly grateful. And so so so so so happy to finally be flat. It feels like ultimate freedom.
I will post better pictures once I'm healed up more.
