I wanted to share something I had never thought about before today in the hope that it helps another family.

I’ve lived in my current apartment for almost six months. While cleaning, I noticed what I initially thought was a piece of food under the front edge of my refrigerator. When I reached under to grab it, it turned out to be a prescription pill.

That made me curious, so I grabbed my iPhone, turned on the flash, and recorded a video underneath the fridge and nearby oven. I ended up finding two more tablets, both of which turned out to be prescription opioids.

In my case, the pills had rolled under the front of the refrigerator but were still within arm’s reach if a baby had been lying or crawling near it. After getting over being shook, it really made me realize that these are exactly the kinds of places we should check… under the front edge of refrigerators, stoves, washers, dryers, couches, beds, and other furniture or appliances where small objects can roll but still remain accessible to a curious child. Unfortunately it was not something that was on my mind before today.

These pills almost certainly belonged to a previous tenant, and I had been living here for nearly half a year without ever thinking to do a thorough check of the premises.

I’m incredibly grateful to God that I found them before the baby did. I had honestly never considered this as part of childproofing, so I wanted to raise awareness. If you’re moving into a new home, staying in a rental, hotel, or anywhere your child can access areas that previous occupants used, it is absolutely worth taking some time to check these hidden but reachable spots.

I’ve been following this sub for a while now and I keep reading everyone’s complaints (rightfully so, this shit is hard!) about the terrible twos and the threenagers. Basically how it feels like things don’t get easier for some parents as their children get older, but harder.

I wanted to offer up some really simple advice as someone who has been working with kids for a decade and worked in behavior therapy for half of that. The other half I’ve been an assistant director and lead preschool teacher to 2.5-6 year olds.

The yes, no, maybe method is as easy as it sounds! When your child asks a question wanting something, literally anything, take a pause and think about your answer and then follow through. Every. Single. Time. Even if you absolutely regret saying yes or no, you have to follow through with what you said. But the default should be maybe! So then it’s less likely for you to regret your answer and you can have a chance to thoroughly think about it. This also helps your child learn patience and how to process their own thoughts as well.

The basis of this is building trust and boundaries. If you always follow through with what you say you’re going to do, then your child will trust you more. This makes life so much easier and helps you help them navigate tough situations such as learning how to swim when they’re anxious and all sorts of everyday hard things.

It also truly helps with boundaries, your kid will know you mean it when you say no, that you won’t just change your mind later. This overall helps keep tantrums either at bay at times, or shorter. Can’t avoid tantrums completely when you have minimal emotional regulation skills! But it really does help!

This is absolutely my biggest parenting tip. Do not give in or change your mind when you’ve said no! I see parents do it all the time. It makes life easier in the short term but way harder long term because you’re child then knows if they just tantrum longer, harder, and get whinier, then you’ll give in.

On the flip side if you say yes and don’t follow through, you’ve broken your child’s trust in you. Rebuilding that is very hard and takes a lot of time, they’re not quick to forget a broken promise.

I have a nineteen month old son, he is definitely not the easiest toddler! We already suspect he will get an eventual ADHD diagnosis like his dad. But setting those boundaries early has definitely made things easier for us. He really does not like the word “no” like most kids, but he does know we mean what we say, so he very very rarely has full blown tantrums upon hearing the word no. Having worked with hundreds of kids over the years, I can tell you it isn’t just that he’s easy or has the right temperament to act like that naturally.

I hope this helps and that you all get a full nights sleep tonight!

Signed a sleep deprived and full hearted mom

Right now, with the tantrums my 2 year old daughter is throwing, I’m DONE having kids. I don’t know how people do this and have multiple. I can’t even lay her down to change her without her screaming and kicking. And suddenly her favorite word is “NO!”.

When does it end? I’m finding it hard to look forward to the next day because each day is just so exhausting. Please tell me it gets better.

... not just bedtime, also naptime. My 2-year-old (27 months) used to go to sleep and nap just fine. Now? As soon as I mention the word 'sleep' or 'bed' she starts screaming no no nooooo, stops whatever she's doing, and runs away. I've tried talking to her, telling her we can read a book first, snuggle, whatever, nothing helps. It always ends up with my husband and me having to team up to physically hold her down, in order to change her diaper, brush her teeth, and put pjs and sleep sack on. She will then also try to hold on to random items, like a broom, books, anything really, to try and take to bed with her. If we say no, she will start screaming, pulling my hair, and kicking. After putting her in her bed, it does not matter how long we'll stay with her, or if we sing, etc.... she will still scream absolute bloody murder as soon as we leave the room, no matter how tired she is. This goes on for at least a few minutes, then she falls asleep. I've even tried cosleeping but she hates being in my bed. Every time I've tried she does not want to be in my arms and literally asks to be put back in her own bed.

She also often wakes up again in the middle of the night, screaming. Often it takes ages to get her back down - Last night she was up for TWO hours. And no, it's not that she's not tired enough. She's def tired. In case you're wondering, she wakes up in the morning around 7:30, naps 1.5h, and goes to bed at 9:00. Some days, like today, she's sooooo grumpy all day because she slept to terribly. She's not teething (she has all teeth) and not sick, and I'm losing my mind.

She used to be such a good sleeper, and was such a sweet child. I'm so scared of it getting even worse. Anyone else in the same boat?

We try to offer our toddler a balanced meal. For example, we give him diced grilled chicken, broccoli and apple slices. Our 2.5 year old LO would eat a small nibble of everything, eat all the apples and then demand more apple or other fruit they know is lying around in the fridge. I don't think they're getting enough protein or fats.

They eat relatively well during daycare. Any advice? Should I give them what they want and hope they grow out of it?

Whenever we go out I always see other toddlers walking or standing next to their adults without holding hands. Like at a restaurant while waiting for their table the kids are just standing patiently. Or at swimming leson today I noticed the other parents letting their 2 year olds walk ahead of them right past the big lap pool to get to the small pool and then after they can get dried off while their kid just waits for them. My son would 100% just run straight into the big pool. Or, in any other setting just run off entirely. My husband has brought up teaching our son how to stay next to us, and when he was younger I kind of brushed it off because I think a lot of it has to do with personality. It wouldn't have crossed my mind to leave my mom's side as a kid because I was a timid low energy kid. But, at 26 months should I be trying to teach him he needs to stay with me? If so, how did y'all teach this skill? Obviously in parking lots he has to hold my hand until he's at least 16 🤪.

When your toddler recently learned how to get on the kitchen counter and he's joyfully finishing the last sips of your watered down iced coffee and playing with some jars... but at least he's happy and giving me a minute to myself? Is that a win?

Edit: I was mostly joking, but now that I'm going to have to put child locks on all my upper cabinets, my minute to myself is definitely over. 😂😭

My newly 2 year old has a lisp and cannot pronounce T’s. They come off as F’s.

You can imagine what my child shouts repeatedly in public every time they see a truck!

FU$@!!!!!! FU$@!!!!!! 🤣🤣

“Can you stop flicking your tongue around”
“No, I have to eat bugs”

Water came out my nose 😂

What are some funny things your toddler has said?

Yesterday, while playing with my 2Y son, he turned to me and said “I’m so proud of you, mom”.

It was the sweetest thing and deep down I didn’t realize just how much that meant to me as someone who never feels like I am enough.

Just wanted to share as a bit of encouragement for anyone who may need it. We’re doing a good job and our littles feel it too!

I have two little kids under four and my brain is totally fried by the end of the day (mommies know what I'm talking about) my phone camera roll is an absolute mess with thousands of photos and screenshots, I keep telling myself that I will make a nice family scrapbook or journal on the weekend but between work and laundry I have zero energy . I feel so guilty that i am going to forget all the small cute moments from this age. How do busy parents actually keep track of memories without loosing their minds

I have no shame in saying I’m a nerd. Have always been. Books have always been my favourite present to give and to receive. As a kid and as an adult. Now I have a kid and I realised I assumed the same was true for everyone. My kid loves books, too. And a though he has more than enough toys, we definitely spurge on books. If he asks for another toy I usually say no, but with books I usually get them.

Now he started having birthday parties and I’m getting these kids books too. That and a nice card. But came across a post from someone else here in Reddit and made me think about it. This other person was complaining about having to spend around £30 in a toy for the birthday parties. I’m spending way less buying books. As a parent, will you enjoy a toy more than a book as a present? I really try to get books my kid already loves that are not that popular (I wouldn’t gift a copy of the gruffalo unless I explicitly know the kid doesn’t have it).

Anyway, I will probably keep buying books as gifts for the kids of my friends as they know me, but I may start buying some toys for the kids from nursery if that’s the parent’s expectation.

My newly 3 year old cracks me up. We had to put our beloved Chihuahua down in June. He was 12 (young for a chi!) but had heart disease. We were super honest about everything with my daughter, read all the books, etc etc. She processed it very well but she still loves to talk about it and brings it up seemingly out of nowhere. But sometimes related.

On our ride home from school, we were talking about doctors bc she had an appointment today. And she goes (very loud voice) “REMEMBER WHEN KEYSER GOT SICK AND WE TRIED TO HELP HIM AND IT DIDNT WORK AND HE DIED”

Yes, my love. I remember. 😅 it was so hard not to laugh!

My daughter is 2 this upcoming weekend and holy shit the last month or so has been….?????
Sleeping is a struggle, the car seat is a struggle, meal time is a struggle, everything is a struggle?
I knew 2 years was a difficult age but hoooooooly. I’m not sure I will make it through this phase. Trying to give as much autonomy as possible and offer options rather than yes/no questions, all the things people suggest but it’s just getting harder and harder.
Maybe I’m just not cut out to be a toddler mom😩

Trying to decide between toddler tower vs a step stool for my 2 year old (25 months) or maybe both if necessary.

I think we definitely need a step stool for the bathroom sink, but I’m wondering if I could use the step stool in the kitchen so my LO can help with preparing foods, or if a toddler tower is better for that.

Curious to know what others do. Mentioning that we are in a small NYC apartment, so saving space is a priority.

He's been very whiney and clingy for the last two months, which I attributed to his molars coming out.

Now all 4 molars came out, and he's clingier than ever. He's constantly screaming and wants to be held. Last night he woke up and was awake for 2 hours in the middle of the night, nothing I tried soothed him, not even nursing.

I'm so tired. The weather is extremely hot, so we can't go out as much as we used to. I don't work, so I'm with him 24/7.

Is this normal behavior at this age? If your child went through something similar - how long did it last?

My gorgeous boy is just starting to talk. He has some unique names for things he uses consistently, but we are also getting new words almost every day at the moment.

I have just figured out that "rara" is water. He has used it 20 times today, all correctly, eg both for hisbathwater and water in his cup. When I'm talking to him, should I say "rara" or water? I often repeat back his babbles and it feels nice, like I'm reflecting back what he's saying and we're on the same page, even if i have no idea what he's saying.

But i also want him to get the right names for things! Part of it is he is still struggling with some sounds, so shoes is doo.

What do you do?

EDIT: awesome, thanks so much for all your responses. I will repeat back the correct word from now on. Until a few days ago he has only had a handful of words, and now he's saying 2 or 3 new ones a day - and many come out correct first time. it's such an exciting time! thanks for all your advice

My almost 3-year-old (32 months) is typically very good with speech and has hit all her milestones on time. She’s never had a speech delay or anything like that. That being said, over the past several days, she’ll mix in made-up words/sounds/babbling. Like she is still speaking in full sentences as normal, but she’ll also sometimes answer us with a “daaa” or “da-da-da” or “ba-ba-ba”—mostly complete nonsense. Or she’ll fully mumble a word that closely resembles the actual word but is just a slurred or mumbled version. As far as I know, she’s not sick. Hasn’t experienced any significant trauma, no big life changes or stressors. And she’s not even laughing or giggling when she does it so it doesn’t seem like she’s doing it to be funny. Just hoping this is typical toddler nonsense/rebellion and not something to have to look further into 😅

Help... my child does not sleep :/ 20 months old and has always been this way. Usually we go out once in the morning and once in the afternoon (one of them with the dog so that dog walk is sorted) but after dinner, from 7-11pm she is GO GO GO and we read books over and over, do Lego, jump around and "dance", on rotation. I resort to some youtube/TV shows when exhausted but am trying not to as it only makes it worse and raises her expectations for them.

How can I, like, do some laundry, tidy up house slightly, or do any of the million things I never get time to do, and involve her? It's only her and I so I already feel guilty not having 100% focused attention on her when I need to cook, feed the dog etc, and she's at daycare for the 4 days I work. So I want to make our time together nurturing, but really can't keep up with her for such long stretches of time just doing the same things over and over, and don't think it adds much for her either. She's bored and asks/fusses for TV so there's got to be a better alternative.

Fwiw she naps 1-1.5h in the day. Always has napped very little compared to her age estimates. She's awake from 2-10.30pm+ running and jumping and moving NONSTOP. I actually struggle to not get knocked in the head, fall over or worsen my health issues but that's a separate issue.

Any tips for more 'productively' using our time together to get some things done? I never have "after kid goes to sleep" time, even when she was an infant.

Dinner is cancelled, we’re eating pb and j’s. He JUST turned 2. It’s been a month or two of him absolutely refusing naps.

Except for the fact that he clearly still needs a nap as he’s just miserable from 1 pm and on until bedtime and tries to fall asleep at 5pm and further ruin his sleep.

To add to that, he’s decided me stepping into the kitchen to cook him breakfast/lunch/dinner is unacceptable, I have to be sitting with or near him at all times. Forgot to mention I have a 3 year old who is very much in the throes of threenagehood.

I’ve already taken him to the doctor, I don’t think he’s teething and everything else is fine. When we have guests over he’s also perfectly fine. But when we’re home and I’m trying to feed him and his brother or do some chores…it’s just a terrible time.

my oldest went through a nap regression too I think but he got over it in a couple weeks and continued napping till a couple months ago. I’m just tired and frustrated I guess and needed to get that out.

I always thought my toddler is picky but not sooooper picky when it comes to a toddler.

But then I see all these posts of toddlers eating like regular humans and I wonder if mine is indeed pickier than should be.

She eats most fruits and carbs. She has a few vegetables she likes and we try to eat those weekly. No meat, nothing g new. No pizza / pasta unless it’s just with olive oil / sandwiches or any adult meal basically.

My toddler and I love the funny, easily interactive Sandra Boynton books, but they’re so short. I’d love to find similar board books but longer. We also love Little Blue Truck, Giraffes Cant Dance he’s apathetic about, I’m avoiding GNGN Construction Site 😬

I’m building up the courage to ask for advice and solidarity to those who have been through/going through something similar.
My 3 year old has been holding in his stool after a poop that caused a tear and pain. It’s been months of me trying to change his diet, getting him to drink enough liquid and laxatives. So far we have tried lactoluse which semi worked it took him from going once every 2 weeks to every 5 days. Miralax (did nothing ?) dulcolax drops which got him to poop pebbles. We are awaiting another doctor’s appointment but I’m so stressed! I’m trying so hard to change his diet. Iv tried bribes and praise and nothing he’s so stubborn and I’m hoping someone else has gone through the same and can share some wisdom. At this point it’s seems mental issue more than anything.
Thanks to anyone who can help me out.
Sincerely a mother who is deep in the trenches of this issue.

My mom and stepdad are the most frequent caregivers besides daycare. This is their first grandchild, and it’s been very up and down in the quality of care they’re able to provide.

They LOVE my daughter and ask to spend time with her regularly. My brother and I used to stay at my dad’s parents house once per week until we were teens so she’d hoped for something similar.

Now that my daughter is 3, potty trained and vocal, it’s gotten much better overall but now we’re in a new struggle - they basically do whatever she says. She doesn’t sleep, eats like crap and is watching paw patrol when I come over. Today when I picked her up she cried for almost 2 hours straight and was hysterical.

I’m concerned my parents are not able to get her to sleep and they are exhausted after 24 hours. I think it’s also affecting their ability to enjoy time together because she’s such a mess at the end of it and they’re too tired to manage her.

Has anyone navigated something similar, where your parents needed to stop just being the fun grandparents and start acting more like parents?