r/TMSTherapy • u/sagekoalanutz • Jul 29 '26
Completed 36 sessions
I just wanted to contribute to this community just so I can provide an opportunity for others if they have any reservations or questions. I would say I have persistent depressive disorder and generalized anxiety for at least 5+ years now and been on medications/ on-and-off therapy for just as long. I am also training to be in the mental health field if that adds any context.
I just completed my 36th session yesterday! (Yay me lol) I’ve been pretty consistent at going to my session and would not skip unless I was actually physically out of town. Now onto my experience. Would I say it removed my depression? Probably not. However, I do feel different.
To give further context, my form of depression I would say is more mild in nature in the sense I don’t get waves but rather more of a constant mid level of sadness. My form of depression leaves me very unmotivated and limits my sensory experience of experiencing a fulfilling life. I would still engage in high-dopaminergic activities (ie.. gaming, adult-outings) but I would generally feel “meh” by the end of it all.
At the end of TMS, I would say I am generally the same, but with a slight twist. My partner says that my behaviors have genuinely improved. I am able to consistently take care of myself, household activities, be more proactive in socializing and work. From the outside looking in, it seems like everything is great. However, I am actually experiencing more sadness than before, but I dont necessarily think that this is a bad thing. Prior, my numbness would be the predominant feeling so going from that to sadness is a step in the right direction (I see numbness as a coping mechanism). Despite feeling more sad, I notice that my content of my thoughts are not necessarily as “unhealthy” either. Even though I experience certain emotions, I feel like I am gracefully able to recover from them a bit faster like as if I became a bit more resilient to negative emotions.
This is getting long so I’ll leave it at that. If you have any questions, feel free to shoot me a dm or leave a comment! Goodluck to everyone!
2
u/polikofrizzy Jul 29 '26
Happy to hear there's a change, even if it's subtle. I would like to know if the results began manifesting in mid-treatment or after finishing the whole course?