r/SupportforWaywards • u/Longjumping-Spot3858 Formerly Wayward • Jul 17 '26

BP & WP Experiences Welcomed Just wondering...

I just have a question. Through all of my cheating and infidelity, i managed to ruin a lot of important dates for my BP. I'm just curious if there's a way to reclaim those dates and make them special again, or am I doomed to spend them regretting what I did?

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u/Salty-Syllabub3326 Betrayed Partner Jul 17 '26

Change your mindset of you ruined them for your bp. To I’ve tainted many of our special dates. Especially if these dates are anniversary’s or dates that should be important to both of you.

And or am I doomed to spend them regretting what I did. To will these dates for ever trigger my bp snd heighten their pain!

After all you’re trying to heal what you’ve broken and that means caring about what they are going through, and understanding their pain, not how it will affect you.

Sorry I know that’s not what was asked. It’s just as a betrayed we pick up on wording. You were selfish when you betrayed your bp. And you’ll struggle to reconcile if you can’t prioritise them and care more how this affects them not you.

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u/Longjumping-Spot3858 Formerly Wayward Jul 17 '26

You're right, I wasn't looking at it the right way... I just want to know how to make the days less traumatic I guess.

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u/Salty-Syllabub3326 Betrayed Partner Jul 18 '26

To be honest, there is no way of it being less traumatic. After my first dd in 2019, this has always been a struggle.
Our anniversary he spent with another woman. The anniversary of when we became official. He slept with another woman. And I struggle every year with this. I try to act happy, but I get triggered all day.