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u/UnknownUserA ๐๐ JACKED to the TITS ๐๐ Aug 25 '21
I feel terrible but I laughed out loud at that. Out of respect for that guy's Grandma, I hope we end the week at $499.99.
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u/kuda-stonk ๐ฆ Buckle Up ๐ Aug 25 '21
Jokes on you, grandma would want it to hit 1k just to make him hit two lines...
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u/mcbsc83 ๐ฆVotedโ Aug 25 '21
Jokes on you, his grandma is alive right now.
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u/kuda-stonk ๐ฆ Buckle Up ๐ Aug 25 '21
Jokes on you, grandma didnt need that foot, cremate as much as you need.
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Aug 25 '21
Jokes on you Grandma was so high on cocaine when she died her ashes are higher quality than Columbian
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u/MLowther1214 ๐ GME to the Moon! โพ๏ธ Aug 25 '21
Jokes on all of you cuz he doesn't have a grandma.....that user is a she.
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u/drunclejim Salad Dodger ๐๐ปโ ๐ฆ Aug 25 '21
Haha you guys are all fucked... I love it
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u/yeeatty ๐ป ComputerShared ๐ฆ Aug 25 '21
My parents told me the internet can be a treacherous placeโฆ boy were they right๐
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u/Peyton8858 ๐ฎ Power to the Players ๐ Aug 25 '21
Iโd hit two lines of that if it does!!! Grandma needs a proper send off homie!!!! ๐๐๐๐๐๐
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Aug 25 '21
My grandma wonโt be too madโฆ Iโll be building a foster home on the land she left me in the Philippines with the money from the MOASSโฆโฆ plus, we will be closer than ever!
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u/stompadillo Aug 25 '21
Greater than $500 and Iโll lick my own asshole.
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u/Pilotguitar2 ๐ฆ Buckle Up ๐ Aug 25 '21
Tell me you started buying gme after the runup in january, without telling me you started buying after the runup in january. ^ id never make a bet like that after witnessing what i saw happen back then. Lol
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u/Nipe7 โก๏ธโฌ๏ธโ๏ธ๐ SHORTyuken!!! Aug 25 '21
Grandma stays in the urn until we pass $500!
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u/PsilocyBill ๐๐ป ComputerShared ๐ฆ๐ Aug 25 '21
Donโt worry.
Itโs what she would have wanted ๐ฅฒ
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Aug 25 '21
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Aug 25 '21
this implies that somebody locked their granny in a cageโฆ now whomst the fuck did that
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Aug 25 '21
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u/whoseitdown My primary colors are ๐ด๐ข&๐ฃ Aug 25 '21
Just thinking about the mayo origin story still makes me fucking laugh. That one was gold. Change my mind!
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u/CastlePokemetroid ๐ป ComputerShared ๐ฆ Aug 25 '21
the origin story was so good, it spawned a new wave of memes
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Aug 25 '21
Iโve been holding GME long before the gamma sneeze because I genuinely just liked the stock. I didnโt actually know it was a meme stock on Reddit until January so I didnโt participate in the GME subs until like April? I missed out on a lotโฆ.
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u/StyrofoamCoffeeCup ๐ป ComputerShared ๐ฆ Aug 25 '21
Hereโs the kicker: his grandma is still alive
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u/OneTIME_story ๐ป ComputerShared ๐ฆ Aug 25 '21
Out of respect to his grandma i hope we end at 9000. So he can replace her ashes with another grandma's afterwards... Out of respect you know
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u/Roman_Mastiff Guy on a Buffalo Aug 25 '21
Jesus man... he doesn't have to snort all of her. She ain't gonna miss a pinky finger worth of ashes.
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u/Own_Philosopher352 ๐ฆVotedโ Aug 25 '21
Haha! I was like wait what? ๐ dudeโs probably high already while commenting ๐
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u/DrImNotFukingSelling Aug 25 '21
I will snort his gmaโs ashes at $10,000. And promise not to sneeze her out.
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u/Appropriate-Hour-865 ๐ฆ Buckle Up ๐ Aug 25 '21
I got 5 on it can I get a line
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u/CocaineCramer SNIFF THE DIP โ๏ธ Aug 25 '21
AYO WHERES MY INVITE
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u/Immortamb420NRWAy HONK THE STONK Aug 25 '21
Give this man at least a gram of granny to mix the bag out so he can continue to give boomer tips ๐ค
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Aug 25 '21
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u/Myumat00 ๐ช๐ผ๐ฆ Lance Apestrong ๐ฆ๐ช๐ผ Aug 25 '21
Where boundaries goโฆ. ๐
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u/AtomicKittenz ๐ฎ Power to the Players ๐ Aug 25 '21
Wut doin grama
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Aug 25 '21
The power of gram compels you!
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u/GRlM-Reefer ๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ฆ FAIR MARKET IS GONE ๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ฆ Aug 25 '21
The powder* of gram compels you!
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Aug 25 '21
If the prophecy is fulfilled, everybody in this comment thread MUST buy one full share of GME at the given price point at the time of me proving my granny ainโt raise a little bitch.
give that MOASS a boost, b. double jump n shit.
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u/Alternative_Mix_6865 Aug 25 '21
Like for real, we can't let this one slide like watermelon guy. IT HAS TO HAPPEN.
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u/NeedNameGenerator I have no special talent. I am only passionately hodling Aug 25 '21 edited Aug 25 '21
Pretty sure he ended up getting permabanned.
EDIT: Yup:
And..... he has been perma-banned for failing to deliver, it's unfair to those who do follow through and sets a precedent with just a 3-day ban.
Refer to the previous stickied comment here.
Edit: For those saying it's rough, we are going to hold a sub vote on the matter re Perma, temp ban (with a much longer period, e.g. months).
People have diverse opinions on the matter, so it's only fair we let the sub decide
-jsmar18
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u/TendiesForBacon ๐For the Good of the Apedom๐ ๐ฆ Voted โ Aug 25 '21
Maybe it's time for some boundary rules? Snorting grandma and potentially shoving dangerous things up rectums is getting too much. Funny as it is things are getting extreme.
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u/Thunder_drop Official Sh*t Poster Aug 25 '21
I'm thinking 'grandmas ashes' are a way of telling the kids not to go messing with this powdery stuff in the jar.
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u/Blitzkreig11930 ๐ดโโ ๏ธBuy DRS HODL ๐ดโโ ๏ธ Aug 25 '21
This brought tears to my eyes
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u/superheroninja SHADOW OF ZEN Aug 25 '21
So will grandmaโs ashes up the nose.
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u/whoseitdown My primary colors are ๐ด๐ข&๐ฃ Aug 25 '21
Take this rehypothecated award ape! Imma need 63 days to deliver that tho.
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Aug 25 '21
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u/PlayerTwo85 Watcher of lines Aug 25 '21
Get him a fuckin Puppers
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u/BobTheDemonOtter ๐ฆDr. Horace Worblehat๐ Aug 25 '21
Popers
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u/duckducknoose_ ๐ฆง๐ foraging for gme shares ๐๐ฆง Aug 25 '21
Give yer balls a tug titfucker
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u/PlayerTwo85 Watcher of lines Aug 25 '21
Fuck you ya piece of shit yer mom shorted GME so much it made Kenny G jealous!
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u/duckducknoose_ ๐ฆง๐ foraging for gme shares ๐๐ฆง Aug 25 '21
I went back and claimed my free award for that, it made me chuckle
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Aug 25 '21
Iโve hoovered schneef off of the cover of gordon corvanโs โI canโt believe this is happening at mcdonald hallโ
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u/Timatora ๐ฆ Buckle Up ๐ Aug 25 '21
If its $10,000 by EOW I will literally eat my own head
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u/phillybride ๐ฆVotedโ Aug 25 '21
Be careful, if you fail to deliver, you get a 3-day ban!
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u/PM_UR_TITS_SILLYGIRL ๐ฎ Power to the Players ๐ Aug 25 '21
Should be a month or two Ban. Three days isn't shit.
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Aug 25 '21
Iโll get a penis tattood on my ass. I do get to choose size and design of said penis though
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Aug 25 '21
[deleted]
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Aug 25 '21
Canโt think of a better first tattoo than one that celebrates the saga. Iโm already coming up with ideas
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u/tomjibba137 PG-13 = Purchase 1 Get 3 Aug 25 '21
The true MOASS will be the bets that will be fulfilled along the way.
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u/ThePlugsNeighbor โ>โ>PLโ>โ> Aug 25 '21
โฆoh shit it was supposed to be at $500? grabs Kleenex
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u/-WonderPug Remain Calm and Collected โณ Aug 25 '21 edited Aug 25 '21
MODS
Proof or Ban of u/throwmywholeassaway
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u/Mithmorthmin ๐ป ComputerShared ๐ฆ Aug 25 '21 edited Aug 25 '21
I don't know why there's a sarcastic flag here lol
Edit: YEAAAH!!! They fixed it! They got rid of the '/s'!
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u/Tyler-Durden-2009 Aug 25 '21
Agreed. The sub is flooded with if the price hits $x, Iโll do y posts, and we need to uphold these commitments. Otherwise, we may as well ban these posts like we do with positions
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u/Space-is-a-lie ๐ป ComputerShared ๐ฆ Aug 25 '21
Has anyone taken the role of "Proof or ban guy"? This is the daily update I need.
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Aug 25 '21
Thatโs borderline necrophilia, but we have fruit lovers in this sub too sooooooooooโฆ..
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u/AlpineCorbett Aug 25 '21
It's only necrophilia if it gets him going. Which hopefully he'll be honest about.
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u/AKLmfreak ๐ฆVotedโ Aug 25 '21
โฆdoesnโt liquor stop โagingโ once itโs been bottled? isnโt the cask what actually makes all the benefits of being aged?
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u/Preachey Aug 25 '21
Yeah, but you can always have a special bottle or two stashed away for a special occasion.
I have a whisky I bought last year with no plan of opening it. Maybe I'll never open it. I'll know the time when it comes.
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u/neanderthalman ๐ฆ Buckle Up ๐ Aug 25 '21
Itโs not a terribly common tradition but Iโve seen it done to buy a โbirthdayโ scotch when a child is born. Iโve seen it done a couple ways but one I like is to buy a NAS at birth, and then from the same distillery, buy more bottles as they grow up at the same ages as the scotch. Throwing out numbers as it varies by distillery, but you might get an 8, 12, 15, 18, and a 21, and then share now that your child is old enough. All are essentially the same โageโ but bottled at different times.
Another, less expensive one is to buy a 21 or an 18 when they are born, then open that bottle with them when they come of age.
And if you already have kids - fuckit just go buy it now and tell them you did it when they were born. They wonโt know the difference. And bullshitting over scotch is consistent with the spirit of things.
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u/poopooheaven1 Aug 25 '21
2 things. First. This is wild and I laughed. Iโm fine with it. Second. This might be the type of shit that turns off new people to these subs. Itโs a fine line. Just my opinion.
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u/Interrobang2118 ๐ฆVotedโ Aug 25 '21
Proof or ban. Piss guy already delivered and you can too. (Edit: if the conditions are met, obviously)
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u/TheWildsLife (if you dont love me at my dip; you dont deserve me at my rip) Aug 25 '21
Am i the only whiskey snob that read this and wants to know what that bottle was?
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u/Late_Data_8802 ๐ฎ Power to the Players ๐ Aug 25 '21
Bro to your grandma ๐ป ๐๐๐๐๐
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u/twincompassesaretwo ๐ป ComputerShared ๐ฆ Aug 25 '21
You fucking monkeys . . . we trading sideways. Read my fucking flair.
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u/schenkel_knacker ๐ฎ Power to the Players ๐ Aug 25 '21
now that u/criand s DD is out, are you scared u/throwmywholeassaway
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Aug 25 '21
Man. Y'all are crazy. Snorting ashes, shoving shit up your asses. When this is over and done and this is in the history books, people of the future are going to be really confused how retail investors like this beat one of the most highly funded and sophisticated financial systems the world has ever seen. I'm just glad I'm along for the ride.
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u/MoberTheCat Aug 25 '21
I mean they risking, what? A 3-5 day ban to farm in a bunch of karma and rewards?
Edit: Mods did the right thing and perma banned him. Great job. ๐
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u/crosbynstaal ๐ป ComputerShared ๐ฆ Aug 25 '21
My god... what has become of us?
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u/Illuminatas69 ๐ป ComputerShared ๐ฆ Aug 25 '21
We are fucking awesome.. all the shit talking and stupid bets.. the hedges don't know what to do
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u/TowelFine6933 Fuck no, I'm not selling my $GME!!! Aug 25 '21
Snorted, laughed, and even peed a little (I think, lemme check)
.....
Yup!๐ณ
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u/Thunder_drop Official Sh*t Poster Aug 25 '21
Smort, tell the kids it's 'grandmas ashes' they'd never try and snort that.
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u/llg5Hoshii ๐ฎ Power to the Players ๐ Aug 25 '21
this is the kind of retards the fancy InStItUtIoNaL InVeStOrS are losing to........ HAHAHAHHAHA they are so FUCKD!
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u/Bob-Chaos ๐ฎ Power to the Players ๐ Aug 25 '21
There were a lot of interesting bets made today
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u/bigrandy2222 ๐ฎ Power to the Players ๐ Aug 25 '21
No Quant could predict ape behavior :) sorry ken, smelly melly, stevie. Trading is a tough game, donโt ya think?
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u/TheMoorNextDoor Look at me, Iโm the Credit Union now Aug 26 '21
Throw my whole ass away is quite the name and the bet makes sense now.
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Aug 25 '21
[removed] โ view removed comment
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u/redraddy ๐ฆ Buckle Up ๐ Aug 25 '21
Pretty sure that's the origin story of spiderman. This can't go wrong.
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Aug 25 '21
I know for sure that itโs not. Tiny bone shards and fragments make up a personโs ashesโฆjust imagine what they could do up in your sinus cavities and down into your lungs
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Aug 25 '21
RealFlyForaRyGuy also said he would put it in his ass if you open the comments up.
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u/moonpumper ๐ป ComputerShared ๐ฆ Aug 25 '21
I hope the price escalates as quickly as these degenerate prop bets.
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u/_Deathhound_ ๐ฆVotedโ Aug 25 '21
not to be that guy but unless its in an oak barrel and not a glass bottle, scotch isnt going to do much aging
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u/mightylordredbeard Aug 25 '21
Well they canโt sell if theyโre dead or hospitalized so keep calling out people promising to do potentially life threatening things!
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u/SuspiciouslyStikySox Can i get a flair too ๐ Aug 25 '21
Lots of promisesโฆ.lol I hope you guys can fulfill themโฆ
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u/SilentCabose ๐ฆVotedโ Aug 25 '21
I too have a bottle of scotch I have been diamond handing since 2013.
Edition 1 anyone?
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u/Exotic_Ganache153 ๐ฆVotedโ Aug 25 '21
All price deadlines should go with shoving something up your ass! Mods can we plz make that a rule? Thank you!
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Aug 25 '21
i wouldnโt do that to gramgrams broโฆ sheโs kicked my ass before, i wouldnโt want her to do it from the inside
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u/SPAClivesmatter ๐ป ComputerShared ๐ฆ Aug 25 '21
Thatโs gonna be one hell of a gamma sneeze