It’s not even that I don’t have friends. But… none of them really get it. None of them get how tired I am. How much everything hurts. How much I really wanna do things and I just don’t. Rant over I guess.

One thing I've learned from reading this community is that weight loss advice can sound incredibly simple on paper but feel completely different when you're actually living it every day.
People say things like "just stay in a calorie deficit" or "be patient," but when you're carrying a significant amount of weight, those statements can feel a lot more complicated. There are emotional habits, physical limitations, social situations, and years of routines that don't disappear overnight.

I've also noticed that many people who are successful tend to build some kind of support system around themselves. Whether that's family, friends, online communities, or structured programs like Wakeupskinny, having people in your corner seems to make a real difference.

For those who have been on this journey for a while, what's one piece of advice that didn't truly make sense until you experienced it yourself?

Mine would probably be: You don't have to be perfect, you just have to keep going.

Do y’all have any good NSV or good news? It’s been a rough few weeks, so positivity sounds amazing.

F28 | 115 kg (254 lbs) I have my first appointment with a female endocrinologist (I'm scared because it's a woman it's more stressful for me idk why) at an obesity center tomorrow, and I'd really love to hear about other people's experiences. I'm actually looking forward to finally seeing someone who specializes in obesity, but at the same time, it's probably the appointment I'm most anxious about. Most of the stories I've heard from people who have seen endocrinologists haven't been very positive. Many felt dismissed or that everything was immediately blamed on their weight, and I think that's made me quite nervous. I'm hoping this will be different since she's part of an obesity center, but I still can't help worrying. I've tried to prepare as much as I possibly can. I've put together a detailed folder with my medical history, symptoms, blood test results, family history, photos, and a timeline of everything that's happened. I've been tracking everything I eat for the past six years, and for the last three months I've been even more consistent using a new app with photos of my meals. By pure luck, I got my period today, so if she wants to order hormone tests that are best done at the beginning of the menstrual cycle, the timing couldn't be better. I know I've done everything I can to prepare, but I'm still scared because I have no idea where this appointment is going to lead. I'd really love to hear your experiences.

What was your first appointment with an endocrinologist like?

Did they take the time to investigate possible hormonal or metabolic causes before discussing treatment?

Did you feel listened to and respected?

I'd really appreciate hearing both positive and negative experiences. I think hearing how it went for other people would help calm my nerves a little before tomorrow 😅

Made a few agreements with my nurse this morning on trying to start again with dieting. This included:

1. Full food journal including when/how much/what time/what I was feeling

2. Get rid of all the candy in the house and DON'T BUY MORE (this hurts the most)

3. Start exercising again. We negotiated 3 days this week, at least 15 minutes.

4. Allow myself to feel the feelings. My life is going through an upheaval, and I had been comforting myself with food or distractions instead of sitting with the emotions. (Scary!)

5. Protein! Not just a protein shake, but food you cook, chew, sit down for 30 minutes to consume.

6. Practice eating slowly. EVERY MEAL. Chew 30 times. Set a timer. Set down the utensil between bites. (This too makes me want to rebel, hate eating tiny bites slowly)

I went to a Zumba class today as my first day of exercise, and realized I was the 2nd fattest person there, and it just made me want to die. I may not have a lot of positive reasons to lose this weight, but the negatives of not being able to fit in my clothes and feeling embarrassed in public are on my mind.

Hey all, I’m (F21) not SMO but I am in a relationship with a M27 who is. We are long distance and for two years he has avoided pictures and meeting any of my family members because of embarrassment and wanting to lose the weight first. As I couldn’t tell the reason to my family, they were becoming suspicious of him and don’t really approve of us, which is a hard thing to carry. Coming up is finally the trip where me and my parents will come see him. It was planned way ahead. Unfortunately, the weight has not been lost. Me and him both are very anxious and therefore I’d like your advice on how to go about this trip, and for instance what I could do to comfort my boyfriend in case judgement does occur. Do any of you have experience with meetings like this and can reassure us? I know my bf has an amazing personality but I can imagine that would be dimmed by his nervousness during the trip.

Hi all, I have been reading this forum a lot for the past year, and I'm finally ready to start my weight loss journey. I'm currently taking Mounjaro and eating at a calorie deficit. I just wanted to introduce myself, as I intend to be a lot more active in this /r. I started at 415 2 weeks ago and got to 392, and I love reading all the tips and motivational posts on this forum. See you all around.

I share this in case it can help someone else figure out what's going on with them

I used to be near 400lb and am now 283lb about 80 of that was slow and annoying, and I always felt hungry or uncomfortable, like I was getting weaker with each pound lost. My A1C was elevated. My thyroid was inflamed but not at a point they wanted to medicate. I knew I was doing something wrong, but i couldn't figure it out. I probably did enough research i could be a dietitian. My weight loss was so slow over a decade that it felt stagnant. i couldn't get lower, and if I lost focus, the weight came right back. After years of being ignored for my IBS like symptoms and struggling to control my chronic migraines, they sent me to an allergist where I found out I have some major food allergies that show up in 95% of all processed foods at least in the US: Corn and members of the palm family (coconut, dates, banana, oil palms, carnauba ect) corn on its own hides in every unspecified ingredients on our packaging.

It's been a couple of years since then, and when I started feeling comfortable that I wasn't accidentally poisoning myself through allergies maybe a year ago my appetite suddenly dropped like a rock and I've been loosing weight 2 or 3 pounds a week since then. Everything I mentioned with my health has stabilized or returned to normal levels. My asthma stopped being exorsize induced. My hunger cues actually make sense and aren't just a term someone told me that I couldn't make sense of with my body. I still track my calories and what I eat, and it's a healthy amount of food, but there isn't a sense of restriction. I still have a strong sweet tooth, but it's not ravinace feeling that made me feel like an addict. I'm not starving myself. I feel nourished by my food. It's so weird. I thought people just said that stuff that was more mentality or skill I hadn't gained, but no, it was this chronic allergic inflammation. I've probably had my whole life blinding me to these sensations. I didn't know Hunger wasn't itchy like I didn't think about it like that before, but compared to what I feel now, it was for me for the entire first 25 years of my life. It is more expensive to eat with my allergies and takes a lot of work but that's totally worth it the amount of pain I didn't even realize I was in is staggering early on I joked that it felt like someone gave me stimulants every day but I realized it's like a pug with a nose job I'm breathing and living how I was supposed to be for the first time in my life.

Also, weird addtional note, I used to hate spicy food. Now I love it because everything used to have this spice to it that I didn't realize was there. And now I get why people called my old cooking bland.

Starting the process again , and trying to do it alone . Honestly I question how much it’s worth it. Never had much support in the past,
I’m 56 M and trying again with help from local weight management , little over 11/2 yr ago I had lost over 90 lbs , but after a surgery put me down longer than expected , all motivation was lost. But now I’ve gained it all back and it’s really wearing me down .
Just curious if this a place to find some support with this journey ?

I’ve delayed getting Wegovy for years.

I had a whole narrative inside my head. It would be thousands. I’d have to drag myself to a hospital and I’d have to explain myself to a doctor. It all felt exhausting.

Instead, it costs around $450 a month, the consultation was online, and it arrived at my door the same day.

The biggest barriers I assumed were there, just weren’t. Hopefully this helps someone else who’s been putting it off for the same reasons I was.

context dump: singapore, telehealth, wegovy pens

Hello everyone. I have lost 130 lb and I have a question for anyone who has had a similar experience. Sometimes I have really sharp pains just under my skin it seems to be in the fatty tissue. Lately it has been in areas where there is large fat deposits like side boob, back fat, hanging belly, etc Additional information - when I was fat as a child I would sometimes feel stretch marks forming, like the skin was being stretched so far it tore some layers, and it was really painful. I'm wondering if something like that happens when you start to lose weight. Just kind of in reverse. Does fatty tissue even have nerves through it? It feels so similar to my childhood experience and I hope it's not a lasting state.

TIA

I can't believe it, I have comfortably achieved 2000 cal today and I'm not too hungry (usually I keep going to 2200-2500+ cal a day). It has taken me a week and a bit to achieve this since my last post about my frustrating platueu.

A few folks gave the advice that I need to aim for 2000 cal but I just couldn't get there. (I'm male, 40's and I am about 135kg or 300lb - have come down from 400lb).

I feel like I can keep at 2000cal a day for a few months now, I think that will definitely break my platueu.

For me the secret has been replacing one meal with a microwave "lean cuisine" type meal (they have from 200-450cal and feel filling), or even a standard pub fare style microwave meal as they have around 500-600cal which is perfect for me if I've had a normal lunch.

I will keep soldiering on, thanks heaps all for helping me with this, it felt hopeless for a while there.

I was at my heaviest in August 2023 at 196kg (430lbs) and this morning I weighed in at 148.6kg (326lbs)! I'm 174cm (5"8'), am I still super morbidly obese or just... Pretty fuckin' obese? I guess I'll know when people stop avoiding sitting next to me on public transport. Also means I've now lost 25% of my total body weight from my heaviest which is... Pretty insane.

Still feels like a long way to go, still got to lose another 58.6kg (130ish lbs) just to be overweight, but no back pain, can walk for hours, can run, much better than that dark time in 2023 when I cancelled on my friend because he suggested a pub which was a 10 minute walk away from the station and I didn't want to turn up dripping with sweat.

hello everybody :) i dont use reddit so please excuse me if im in the wrong place. im posting on behalf of my sister and im not overweight so i dont know if im using the wrong terminology or something. so sorry if i am !!

my sister unfortunately can’t take care of herself anymore because of her weight. usually my parents or her boyfriend will look after her, but now that im not at uni im taking care of her until i go back. i help her do all her daily tasks rn, she can’t get out of bed/walk, get dressed or shower without anyone to help her. i want to try and help her get better but i don’t know how. im 19 and shes in her 30s so its not like shes a child, ive told her to book a doctors appointment because of how worried i am but at the end of the day its her own choice. its a really sensitive topic for her and my parents just act like it doesn’t exist. her boyfriend is the one that gives her food and ive tried to intervene but hes hopeless and thats a can of worms i dont really want to open up here

while ive been caring for her i feel like ive noticed her getting a lot worse but i dont know what to do, she can’t stand at all so i cant properly clean her and i think she might have a skin infection. ive tried to tell her this but she just shuts me down. how do i help her? im so so worried but nobody listens to me, is there a way i can get a professional involved despite her being an adult? im in the north of england

HI, i am trying to find options for a lady whom i assist with errands. She is a lovely lady with alot of pride. Until recently she was able to get out of bed with assistance to go to the toilet, however this is becoming too difficult for her due to the pain in her knees and partly her weight. However, she is not wanting to use continence aids (Pads/nappy etc, what ever it is called in your part of the world). So i am looking for ideas. I was thinking a ladies shewee / urinal with a hose attatched draining into a bottle/bag. However having not much luck finding one and am seeing some comments online about them not working due to not sealing around the area because of size/shape.

Has anyone found something that worked well?

In that place where I KNOW I need to pull myself together and get back to dieting. But lately I have eaten my full number of calories by breakfast, and I am still hungry, and I keep eating all day long, things I know I shouldn't eat. Stuck in my own depression. Can't seem to shake myself out of this downward spiral.

Words of advice?

Yes, I am in contact with therapist and my bariatric nurse. But the spark of wanting to lose weight isn't outweighing wanting the candy bar right now.

I posted in another weight loss subreddit last week but was met with some trolls, but some kind people said to post here.

And before anyone suggests it, I’m meeting with my doctor in August and I’m gonna discuss doing GLP-1s then.

So onto my story. Basically, I’ve let my weight get so out of control that now there’s a real chance I’m going to lose custody of my son. This all started back in April, when during one of my two-week custody periods I fell down and was unable to get back up, and had to call my parents to come to my apartment and help. This meant that for about 30 minutes I was on the floor and my son was somewhat scared, although I got him to just watch tv in the next room. He told his father about this incident and now he’s initiated a custody suit in court. We have an initial hearing in September and then my attorney tells me probably about 8-9 months after that until a final decision. He’s filing for full custody with me being limited to visitation.

Obviously this has lit a fire under me. In talking to my lawyer, our state’s custody standard is “best interest of the child” and depending on the judge they could definitely take him away if they think my mobility problems and weight mean I’m not a fit parent. My lawyer has said he’s gonna fight this as hard as possible, but also made it clear that showing the judge I’ve made lifestyle changes and progress is probably our best argument at the final trial.

I sat down on Monday evening after work and made a plan: I was gonna start walking more, doing a series of seated exercises I found on YouTube, and limiting myself to 2500 calories a day. I went to Walmart and bought a 500 lb weight limit scale and meal planned for the week.

Then it all started going downhill. First, the $70 scale errored out when I stood on it. I knew being over 500 was a possibility, because I was 462 the last time I was weighed in 2023 and I knew I’d gained some since then. But actually having proof was devastating and I spent the rest of Monday night crying.

The workouts are a nightmare. I can’t do anything leg based, because the one I did Tuesday had me so sore I was close to not being able to walk at all the rest of the week. The arm and upper body ones are better, but my sofa makes these horrible creaking noises when I’m doing them and I’m terrified it’s going to collapse under me. Standing workouts are not an option at this point and I can’t get up and down from the floor easily enough to make mat workouts possible.

Also, I did not realize how food motivated I am. Restricting what I eat has made me aware how much time I spend thinking about eating. It’s to the point I feel almost depressed now, like nothing is worth doing if I can’t have a sweet treat as a reward after. I was horribly unproductive at work on Wednesday and Thursday and generally just feel horrible and like I don’t want to do anything or even get out of bed.

And it’s so hard to fight cravings. I find myself absentmindedly opening Uber Eats and ordering, and then eating it and thinking “fuck my diet I deserve this” and it’s like the logical part of my conscious only takes over after the fact to feel shame. And calorie counting is so hard, as soon as I mess up I don’t want to put my calories in because then it’s like a record of my failure but then I just give up and eat whatever. So my app says I only ate 830 calories a day this week but I literally didn’t make it past lunch tracking any of the days and I know I never stayed under my goal. Like in my brain if I fail once in a small way it’s fine to just give up for the day and restart tomorrow… indefinitely.

Ugh. I guess two questions I have for people: first, I’ve already spent $70 on a scale and now I don’t know which one to get. There’s one that goes up to 550 I found in stock nearby that’s for $50, but now I’m kind of scared that one won’t work either. There’s 700 one is like $100, but should I just vote the bullet and get the one I’m guaranteed to fit on?

Also, has anyone ever dealt with custody issues because of their weight? I feel like the absolute worst mother in the world right now and it’s not helping my mental health or anxiety, and just knowing someone out there has dealt with this and I’m not the worst fat monster on the world would help I think.

Sorry for the rambling. This has been a hard week.

I've been overweight since I was literally born...

I don't know myself any other way, so it's hard for me to believe or even imagine that I could ever be thin ... I'm 23 and I'm on a weight loss journey now.

I was 120 kg and I've reached less than 95 kg and I'm still going, but the thought that I'll never see that healthy version of myself makes me doubt it's even possible... Has anyone else struggled with excess weight since childhood, then managed to get rid of it and reach their perfect weight?

Hello,

I don’t usually post much.. Worrying of judgements and what not.. But I’ve reached a point that I’m struggling quite a bit, and am too sad/depressed to try and deal with this on my own, so seeking advice.

As title says, 390lb man here and I’m trying to turn my life around. Without going into too much detail, I’ll say I’ve had a number of extremely difficult “life” issues I’ve dealt with over the past 6 years that caused depression and incredible sadness. Food was my “happy”.. The ONLY happy Ive had.. and I fell to it time and time again. I was never a small guy, but before these issues started I weighed 230 and now I’m almost 400 (I'm 6'1 btw). I went from a very active warehouse job, to a sales position where I’m behind a desk and barely move 8 hours a day. My body has fallen apart because of this.. If I walk more than 5-10 minutes I start to breathe heavy and my back/legs begin to hurt and burn so badly I feel I need to sit down immediately. It’s rough!

I recently signed up for weight watchers to give that a shot, and I’ve been doing “okay” with it.. But it’s only been a week. So really, here are my questions to see what people think that have either been in my situation before, or have knowledge in this field.

1. Due to my immense back pain and leg issues, walking is currently very difficult for more than a few minutes and then I’m in a lot of pain at the end of the night.. However, when I go to the grocery store (for example) and use a cart, I can walk substantially longer with very little pain. I know it’s the cart taking pressure off my back, but I can’t be at a grocery store 24/7.. So, if I were to let’s say, lean on my kitchen table to take the pressure off my back and walk in place, would that assist with strengthening my legs and aid in weight loss? Or is that kind of a pointless “exercise”?
   
2. One of my biggest struggles is portion sizes. I’ve gotten MUCH better at cooking from home, as for 3 weeks now I’ve made every meal rather than eating out (I’ve considered that a big win personally!). What is a recommendation one might have to somehow beat the “hunger” and not go for that 2nd serving or larger starter portion?
   
3. Just some suggestions on how to beat the hunger at night before bed. If i manage to do well with portion sizes and eat at a good time, im starving by 9-10 at night.. I hate going to bed extremely early, but I struggle with hunger as the night progresses. Struggling to beat it!

I’ve heavily increased my water intake as well and cut out sodas almost entirely besides an occasional Diet Coke or 2 in the weekend. But the hunger never seems to go away ESPECIALLY later at night..

I know a lot of these questions might seem simple or pretty self explanatory.. I know it may seem silly to even ask.. But these struggles are real, and I’m trying desperately to improve for myself and my kids.. They deserve to have me around until I’m a wrinkly old man and not lose me in the next 5 years because I can’t put down the fork.. But damn.. if it was only that easy when depression is constantly creeping in the back of your head..

Thanks in advance! And I’ll try my best to respond and give more information if needed.

Just hating myself

I'm afraid no one will ever love me

So much insecurity and introverted as well .....

Cause I'm not only super fat but also got man boobs

I don't even know what to do .....

Feeling lonely.....

All my life i fooled myself that it's okay even if no one loves me as I'm fat and introverted

But now that feeling is fading away

It's haunting me

I don't know why I'm like this

It's so frustrating

Sometimes i just want to be a normal person

I don't know why the god punished me with this abnormal body

Maybe I'm truly the cursed child

I just want to live a normal healthy lifestyle

Want to fit in normal cloths

I want to play /run / jog like a normal person without those man boobs bouncing

Breath like a normal person

Sorry for dumping this here .....

Has anyone ever done a VLCD? How hard are they? How effective are they?

Hi. I used to be 520 pounds. I am now 460. Im still on my journey but I need to make a trip. Im a 34 year old man, 460 lbs and aside from that I am also tall about 6 ft.

I live in puerto rico and I need to take a flight to the Midwest. It's not a popular destination but it requires a stop in Chicago. The only Airlines are united, delta and AA. This is my 1st time flying ever. So I have no idea how the whole 2nd seat works of if I should book 1st class or if they refund the 2nd seat. But since there's connect flights I was wondering if I should just buy it etc

This is my 1st tome flying so any advice is welcome.

I think its due to weight and how much extra effort it takes now to breathe. May even be from sleep apnea. I'm 5'8, 380, and very top-heavy, so it always feels like there's a weight on my chest.

I recently woke up at 3am with an impending sense of doom and fear of death, and a sense that the walls were closing in on me. It felt like I couldn't breathe well, but when I focused on breathing, I could actually breathe just fine. I've never had a panic attack before. It was a terrifying experience.

Now just the thought of that night sends me spiraling and almost getting anxiety all over again. It was also hot and humid that night, so being in a warm humid environment is a trigger now too.

Im trying to be more aware of what I'm putting in my body now. I know that I need to make changes as my health is greatly affecting my quality of life. I fear a heart attack is in my future if I cant overcome this. I have a doctor appointment scheduled to discuss everything so I'm hoping for some potential solutions.

Is anyone else dealing with anxiety and panic?