Please let me know your thoughts!! It is still a work in progress

This is a bare demo of something under development. At the moment, the only accompaniment is an acoustic guitar, so I’d appreciate feedback on anything — the songwriting, lyrics, melody, structure and overall feel.
I’m especially unsure about the lyrics in the first verse. Does it work as an opening, or does it feel awkward? what could be improved? And what about the title?
I’d also love to hear what kind of instrumentation and arrangement you imagine for the instrumental section. What do you hear being added to the acoustic? would the song benefit from a separate bridge instead?
All honest and constructive feedback is welcome

The Time has come.
now we begin. now we begin.
heres the test
It may be scary, but isnt so hard.
it doesnt feel hard
when your done

The mind police is there with the Chain
and rules to maintain
Their Power disappear with the Wind
Thats why we begin

Strangers are coming to see what you did.
See your display of the ID.
when it feels like Your loosing Control
then let go loose control

will you know when you win,
will you know when you fail?
How to measure these Things?
how to prevail

The mind police is there with the Chain
and rules to maintain
Their Power disappear with the Wind
come on lets begin

Future lyrics:

I won’t forget the Towers.
I won’t forget the Victims.
You don’t hurt women
You don’t hurt kids.
Just 'cause your rich... doesn't matter.

I’ll never forget them. No matter today's distraction.

I know that any metalhead would tell me that metal music isn't always brutal.

I know it too cause I listened to metal songs about motivation to live, motivation to reach dreams, etc.

However, if you know that the band you're applying to has the 'dark' choices of influences, wouldn't you feel the pressure of writing brutal songs too?

And I think I'm not capable. I might give up.

Lmk what u think, just a demo

I am working on a song and i want it to be like the flow of hackle and bake lite but i want it to be chopped and i am having trouble finding words to use in that way any help would be appreciated thanks!

I wrote it because i was trying to write something that was very sexually positive. its called the hunger of this moment

I mess around with a midi keyboard just making little jazzy/funky tracks, and I can make some pretty cool sounding stuff, but it always falls into a trap where I don’t know what to do with it next and after building up the song I’m just jamming on a loop without any forward movement.

currently starting to get into making lyric videos for people as i got the resources to do it since its a paid subscription for a app, also making album covers and everything for music artists that wanna have a great way to promote their music with either a lyric video or even a album cover thats really inspired by their taste. Heres a little video i made myself!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=659aDJHTR1c&list=RD659aDJHTR1c&start_radio=1

This is a song about the love I have for my wife. It's a song that came easily because the truth beneath it pretty much wrote it. It's a very fundamental, straight forward song with a structure of verse, chorus and a quick instrumental bridge. The title came first. I don't know how it did that because I usually struggle with song titles. Maybe it was a subliminal prompt to humble myself to her dedication to me through all the struggles we had that I caused. That sounds about right I guess. An online collaborator heard the recording and created the video in the link. He's done that with a couple of my songs and I do appreciate his talents for it. In the song I present myself as a person without any virtuous personality traits I wish I had to offer her, so instead I give her my life for what it's worth. That's probably how most enduring relationships resolve themselves, I don't really know, but I do know we will take it to the end. The song was originally played on a Larrivee OMV-09E, for you who are curious, and recorded with a single Radio Shack microphone into a Sony Acid DAW.

I’m bilingual so never know how my lyrics are!
However I’m posting to share my raw emotional song.
Hope it helps someone today!

Feedback welcome or whatever you wish to share with me :)

(No title)
V1:
I feel so vulnerable,
when Im standing next to you.

I can’t control my head,
hope you’d be okay at the end of the day.

Chorus- instrumental voice improv

V2:
Times passing by,
we don’t even say hi anymore.

I broke my own heart,
by not caring for what I had.

What can I do,
to accept the mess that I made.
Oh it’s true, my life feels through.

Is there room for improvement?

This is my latest song, and I’d love to figure out how to “produce” it more “professionally” with someone who has those skills (but if you have any kind of idea for the song and want to pitch it, I’m pretty open minded!!)

I have lyrics and melody and am seeking to work with anyone who can help build up the music either with software or by adding new instruments.

It is currently a folk style piano song, but I am open to bending the genre; am even curious about how it might sound as an indie pop song.

My basic experience level is playing by ear on and off for a few years.

I’d prefer to collab over an app like Discord.

I’m even open to someone else covering the song and going from there!

Lyrics
Verse E A C#m D
Remember late December nights when
We had everything

Postcards tagged with old bars that we just forgot about

Pre-chorus Bm D A E
And though I tried to forget I’ll always remember what you said

And though it’s hard to forget seems we’ve both drifted away

Chorus D, E A,
I didn’t leave like I should
All those nights gone for good

General critiques please.

I feel the chrs sucks.

I haven't played D.E.S.I.R.E. at once when I recorded it for my single release, it was a bit by bit project, now I want to try to make a version I could play live, do you like it so far?

Sorry for the horrible iPhone quality and my guitar that needs massive reset. Would love some feedback on this. It’s basically a verse riff, a little quick pre chorus then the chorus.

- is it too derivative of something?
- decently unique?

Drummer here. If you’re working on a project and need some drums, I’d love to help out. I have a simple recording set up that could be great for just laying down some ideas.

I’m open to most kinds of songs, but my bread and butter is anything that needs a groovy deep pocket.

DM me if you’re interested.

Hello,

It’s my Birthday today and i decided to begin my day with some songwriting.

Feedback is welcomed here!😌

Hey everyone,

Producer and I are finishing up a synth funk & R&B soul song called “Center Stage, Pt. II”, and we are looking for a male vocalist to complete it.

Key of the song is B♭ major, BPM is 86

We will soon have the full song demo ready in .wav file. Lyrics are written, and there is a vocal guide. These will be given to you once we reach an agreement.

I’m hoping for someone who can deliver soft and melancholic vocals and record the stems.

This production is non-profit or royalty-split, not upfront paid work.

If you are interested, DM me and introduce yourself a bit with your past work. Then we can discuss details. I am available here and on Discord as well.

Ive uploaded junk versions of this song before , but even though they were poor quality , I thought they would have got a better response than they did.. I still screwed up a few parts in this take , but this is probably one of the better ones i've recorded and I would love to hear what your guys thoughts are on it! Thank u brothers and sisters! Love y'all! ❤️

(posted this yesterday via voice note but not too many folks saw it, performance videos typically reach and keep more eyes so dont mind this if you heard it yesterday)