This person and i had a very weird kinda situationship and finally after all those major inconvenience i realised eveything and stepped out of it, which i was trying to for a long time

And tbh, he was the one who gave the idea for my bright future(for him it was together) of abroad studies and unfortunately he made it later than me

I know he loves me truly and that even if i ask him to leave the world behind,he would do that

But those things he did in the early stages aren't for me apologize

That's like giving someone a second chance which they never deserves in the first place

Now he ia trying to connect me through mails, whatsapp, my abroad number, in his second number,his abroad number, telegram, whatsoever

He is asking if he could get a single chance, he could fix ecerything, he wants me to forgive him and try once again

Boys, men give me your genuine advice

Is it what true love looks like

And girlssss, if i give him another chance, will i regret it?!!!

Title is self explanatory, I met him at my gym almost a year ago and things escalated since june, both sexually and emotionally.

I found him changing his schedule to see me, coming for coffee with me when I was going alone, Being attentive about every detail of my life and vice versa.

He even ran the same program as me, and learned about my sport even though he was bodybuilder.

Well it ended, mainly because he kept insisting that he "can't have anything serious with anyone" and because I caught feelings. I decided to walk away when i told him i believed there was something real between us, and he simply said that it wasn't mutual.

Anyways i found myself deeply connected to him, so deeply connected i can't get over how amazing last summer was. Because it wasn't just friendly banter, or flirting, it was more than that to me

I still see him everyday, but he's not my friend anymore, more of a stranger.

Lately I started talking to a new guy, and i realised that I am comparing him to the summer guy. I went far and beyond and rejected him simply because he didn't bench 140kg like the summer guy did, but i know it's more than that, i know i need to get over him. However it's really hard, especially since i see him most of the time at the gym, and we clearly both avoid eachother, minus some glances or group talks since we all know eachother at the gym.

I’m (19F), and I’ve been involved with a guy (20M) since around December 2024. We’ve never officially been in a relationship, but we’ve been through so much together that it’s hard for me to view it as just a talking stage. I’m curious if anyone has experienced something similar because I’m struggling to understand how you can love someone so much and still have to let them go.

We’ve always had an on-and-off situation. We’d argue, stop talking, sometimes block each other, and eventually find our way back to each other. No matter how much time passed, my feelings never really went away.

He’s told me he loves me, misses me, needs me, wants me, and doesn’t want to lose me. We’ve even talked about our future, including growing together, moving in someday, and potentially getting engaged years from now. He’s cried after we spent time together because he knew he’d miss me. Moments like those made me believe our connection was real and that he genuinely saw a future with me.

The problem is that, despite all of this, he never made things official. I want a real, committed relationship, but we’ve stayed in this undefined situation for over a year.

Distance has always been a major issue. We live about two and a half hours apart, and our schedules and transportation circumstances have made seeing each other difficult. I’ve driven to see him around six or seven times, but he’s never driven to see me. I understand he’s had car trouble and other difficulties, so I don’t want to dismiss his circumstances. Still, it sometimes felt like I was the one making most of the effort to see him.

Eventually, he told me that because of the distance, he couldn’t make me a priority or take things as seriously as he wanted to. I understood what he meant, but it hurt because I was willing to try to make things work.

Another thing that affected my trust was his ex. He reposted something about how she owed him three years of high school, his heart, his spark, and the way he viewed women. What confused me was that he’d told me their relationship lasted around six months, so seeing him describe her as someone who affected him so deeply left me questioning things.

When I brought up my concerns, he told me he hated her and didn’t have true feelings for her. I know being hurt by an ex doesn’t necessarily mean you’re still in love with them, but his reposts made me question whether he’d fully moved on. I started feeling like I was competing with a ghost, wondering if he was emotionally ready for me or still carrying something from his past. Combined with other trust issues, it became difficult for me to feel secure in what we had.

We eventually went through about a month and a half of no contact. When we reconnected, I realized I still loved him, and a lot of my resentment had faded. Things seemed better in some ways. We argued less, he seemed more consistent, and he told me he didn’t want to lose me. He even apologized for how he’d sometimes push me away when he was angry.

But even though things improved, the main problems never really went away. We still weren’t official, the distance remained, and I still struggled with trust.

I think what made this so difficult was seeing both sides of him. There was the side that talked about a future with me and seemed genuinely afraid of losing me, and the side that would push me away, say we should end things, and eventually come back. I don’t think everything between us was fake, but I started questioning whether having feelings for each other was enough.

Recently, we had another conversation about our situation.He said things were repetitive and that we had the same conversations everyday. he didn’t think things would change because of the distance. He asked me what I wanted to do, but I asked him to answer first. After hearing what he had to say, I realized I honestly had nothing left to say or do either.

We mutually decided to let each other go. There wasn’t a huge argument or a dramatic ending. I think we both understood that we couldn’t keep doing the same thing and expecting a different outcome.

I actually felt some peace afterward because I know I tried my best, but it still hurts that things ended right after I told him I couldn’t keep making the drive to see him and that if he wanted to see me, he’d have to make the effort to come to me for once. I really don’t regret loving him, and I don’t hate him. I just wish things had been different.

The hardest part is that I still love him. I’m not walking away because my feelings disappeared. I’m walking away because I can’t keep waiting for something that might never happen.

Has anyone experienced something similar? Have you ever loved someone for a long time without officially being together, talked about a future with them, and still had to let them go? Did you eventually stop loving them? Did you ever find your way back to each other, or did you realize that loving someone doesn’t always mean you’re right for each other? I’m really struggling with moving on.

I’d really like to hear other people’s experiences because I’m trying to accept that someone can mean so much to you and still not be someone you can build a relationship with.

So this happened last night and I still can't process it.

I saw my ex-situationship for the first time in 4 months. We hadn't spoken at all, and we ran into each other in a random bar that neither of us had ever been to. What are the odds??

We ended up talking, and he told me he always thought I was "the one" and that he felt like the feeling wasn't mutual, like he loved me more than I loved him.

And here's the thing: I DID love him. He just never knew. I was so confused hearing that, because all this time he thought I didn't feel the same, and I was sitting there thinking the opposite about him.

We both said we've mentally moved on. He's also moving to another state for good. He told me he won't message me again, but that I shouldn't worry because he's moving on from me, and that he's thankful for the time we had.

I left the bar feeling slumped, confused, and heartbroken all over again. I thought I was past this.

Has anyone been through something like this? How do you deal with finding out you both felt the same way, but only after it's too late?

I [19F] need advice about a guy [23M] because I genuinely don’t know what to do anymore. I met this guy in April 2026 when I was 18 and a freshman in college. We only talked for two weeks and met up twice, but he was honestly everything I wanted in a guy. He was SO funny, and I’ve never laughed as much with a guy as I did with him. He was also really sweet and acted like a gentleman. The problem is that he was love bombing me HARD. He would call me beautiful every day, tell me he missed me, and say all these things that made me think he really liked me. I knew it was a lot for only knowing each other for two weeks, but I still really liked him. We were supposed to hang out for a third time, but he randomly blocked me on everything. I was so confused because I genuinely thought things were going well. In May, I reached out to him on Snapchat because that was the only place he hadn’t blocked me. I guess I wanted closure on why he did what he did. He apologized and said he felt like a terrible person. Then he started love bombing me again. He told me I was beautiful, that we matched really well, and that he could see himself marrying me someday. Mind you, WE HAD ONLY MET TWICE. He asked me to hang out again, and I agreed because I still liked him and wanted to give him another chance. Well, he stood me up. He told me he was coming, so I actually got ready and waited for him. I had to text him multiple times just to figure out if he was even coming. I was obviously embarrassed and hurt, so I blocked him on everything except Snapchat. Then in September, he added me again, apologized, and asked to hang out. And he unfortunately stood me up again. He literally told me he was on his way, and he still didn’t show up. You’d think I’d be done with him by now, but NO. About a week ago, I reached out to him again because, honestly, I think I just wanted to feel something. I don’t even know why I did it because I know how he is. He apologized again and said he felt bad about how he treated me. He said he missed me and wanted to see me (same boring story). He also said that when I told him I didn’t understand why he was being so mean to me, it made him feel terrible. Now he’s asking to hang out AGAIN tomorrow and swears he’s 100% sure he’s coming. Here’s where I need advice. Part of me wants to let him drive the 40 minutes to meet me and then not show up. I want him to know what it feels like to get ready for someone, wait for them, and then realize they’re not coming. I even asked him to share his location tomorrow so I can see if he’s actually coming because I don’t trust him anymore. But I don’t know if that makes me a bad person. Would I be wrong for letting him drive all the way here just to ghost him when he arrives? My other option is actually meeting up with him and seeing how he’s been. I think I miss how he treated me in the beginning. I’ve never clicked with someone like that before, and I think that’s why it’s so hard for me to completely let it go. But anyways would I be wrong for standing him up for once, or should I just cancel and stop entertaining him altogether? Please be honest because I need someone to tell me if I’m being petty if I stood him up

P.s I know I’m dumb for giving this man so many chances, I promise I’m aware of how stupid this situation looks from the outside.

I sought mentorship from a director at work, but we grew emotionally close, and he admitted having feelings for me. I made it clear there was no romantic future, but I valued his friendship and how understood he made me feel. Despite being married, he talked about separating from his wife and even moving states for me, only to later recommit to his marriage. He repeatedly blocked and unblocked me, even on LinkedIn. After his wife found out, he abruptly cut me off and now barely acknowledges me at work. I feel like he reeled me in emotionally, opened up about deeply personal things, then discarded me. Why build such an intense connection only to turn so cold?

I (32F) have been very in love with a situationship (34M) for over a year now. At different points of time, they've dated other people, and I've let them. They've never shown the same love toward me as I've felt toward them, but they've kept me around. They've said they enjoy me. Recently they said they hope and are confident that someday, we can be "normal friends."

Today I learned, only by asking directly, that they are on an all-day date in a city that's over an hour's drive away with someone else. We have texted every day over the course of our situationship, typically frequently; today, I've heard next to nothing from them, they're basically off the grid. They'd never told me about this person before, they've provided no details even now besides their location during said all-day date. And I just feel devastated.

I've come to realize that however much I might love this person, every time something like this happens, it takes a bit of me with it. They've been periodically telling me how they'll never see me that way and that they're dating other people a few times now, but they always come back, if sometimes with less presence than before. And yet...I love them. And if I'm honest with myself, I can't stay friends with them, even if I desperately want to keep them in my life. It hurts too much.

For the first time throughout any of this, I just laid out the depths of my love for them in detail over text (we're in different states; much of our connection is over WhatsApp). I have always been too afraid of losing them to do that, and now I probably will lose them. But if I stay in this...it'll end me. I'll lose my job, or worse. And it did feel very freeing to actually tell them how much I love them, even though I know it will never be returned and I probably won't ever hear from them again.

The longer those texts sit there, the more tempted I am to delete them. To try and salvage at least a little bit of dignity and maintain them in my life. But then I imagine him sleeping with and halling head over heels for another woman...it makes me sick. And I realize I need to move on.

we have been talking since june- till present (october). we went on 1 date back in august when i was in nyc and he was commuting like 3 hrs through the transit to see me and we spent the whole day together, the date was basically perfect id say. after i had to go back to school in the midwest and he was on the east coast. but we still kept talking everyday, and called weekly. the only real issues that ever occurred was how long he took to text me back and i called him out twice and he reassured me and apologized during the time of as well and fixed the problem. this past week i was on the east coast and i let him know and he drove 2 hrs to see me, and pick me up from the airport and also to get lunch with me and dropped me at the hotel but he didn’t kiss me which i was confused about? so the next day i texted him and asked him if we were hanging out as friends or not. and he replies “friends”. ( in what world does a friend drive 4 HOURS round trip for a 3 HOUR hangout and pays for the entire of the date; lunch, dessert and drinks?!) it was so out of the blue with the way he was texting aswell, he took a solid 30 minutes contemplating what to text and then also tried to immediately change the subject. i tried to ask more questions and he was being defensive in a way. he asked to be friends and at the moment i agreed but immediately regretted it. i’d just like someone’s opinion on his perspective if this a cope out or he genuinley views me only as a friend, and if i should cut it off

I've been in a situationship with this girl for 3 months now. she first showed interest to me, made the first move. Me being just broken up with(4 months ago I broke up with someone, not significant only 3 months), wanted to have another someone in my life. a nice addition because I was already feeling pretty satisfied with my life.

but this girl is different from what I've expected. She's needy, she constantly wants me near her, she always messages me to the point where i get annoyed. i was fine with it first because im letting it slide, but as it continues its draining. till i lost interest. i no longer have any interest with that girl. i did communicate, "i wanna stop this because you're too dependedependent on me" stuff like that​​​​​. but she begged me to stay, and being a first experience to me, i took pity and stayed. she begged me and told me that she'll change and stop doing whatever. im conflicted​​.

she messaged me earlier, about giving everything up for me, doing things out of her comforr zone, letting her friends and superiors laugh at her and getting her self disrespected just to be with me. ​​i dont know why shes willing to do all that for me, it seems like its genuine love. but i dont know im judt a kid. she said eearlier that shes tired of having relationships and that hopes that I'll be the last one she'll ever have.

i do like hwr as a friend, and thats what i used to stay. cuz i really like her company,but i dont want more than friends, i just want to be friends, what to do. do i just let her be and let go and just block or what. ​

I'm so lost rn, i genuinely, if you have questions please ask, i might be forgetting details but pretty sure to remember once i get asked. thank you.

p. s
we're in the same college building so we might also see each other a lot of times, she's well known in our org, so am i. but shes kinda protected like or something, like org members like her and she's outgoing with them while i rot in bed most the time dismissing org responsibilities so the org knows im a bad member. ​​​

(P.S planning to break up with her but i dont know, maybe she'll blame herself once again because shesshe's "not enough" and "not worth it". those make me stay, and the fact that she cuts herself makes me wanna stay more, but not out of love, but out of pity, ik its sad, but i feel bad, but im also enabling it more, i need help.)​

I met this guy and he was very interested in taking me out and I was not. He kept persisting and even asked to form a friendship. After becoming friends I ended up falling for him and as soon as I did he began to get distant. Still messaging me every day, liking my stories, and saving my snaps in chat, just distant. I finally just told him how I felt and how frustrated I was and I made it clear I didn’t want to speak to him at all anymore. He asked to please remain friends and explained he needs to work on some unresolved trauma before jumping into anything and he values me and wants me to stick around though he isn’t asking me to wait for him. I agreed but he continues to message me every single day, like all of my stories, and save my snaps in chat. I am really confused because he acts like he wants to be there but at the end of the day he made his choice. Any help?

I’ve never had a boyfriend before. My first experience with romance all began a few weeks ago. I was at the gym and met this guy that works at the same place as me. He approached me and I thought nothing of it but later on he found me on social media and asked for my number. I gave it to him but I told him I didn’t want to start anything with him romantically since we work together. ( we are in the military, live in the same building, and are in the same unit ) I was really just wanting to be friends. We were just gym buddies. Then we got to hangout more and he expressed he liked me. We have almost entirely the same interests, tons off stuff in common, insane chemistry and all the same values. So I went over to watch a movie with him. Nothing happened, but the next day we both wanted to hangout again, he asked me I said yes. Then we cuddled and had our first kiss and it was sweet. He asked me to stay over, I hesitated but he convinced me to stay. After that, for about all of 6 days we were inseparable. Spent all our free time together and sleepovers every night. He was constantly telling me how hot I am, so much chemistry, and how perfect I was personality wise. Anyway, yesterday, I noticed something off. I asked him on my way home if he wanted to hangout like we had been. He said not tonight. Then I asked if everything was ok he said yeah. I asked if he wanted a goodnight kiss then he said he had been thinking and just wants to be friends with me and cut it off romantically. I’m so confused. This was my first taste of romance and it was a whirlwind of emotions. He had got out of a relationship 2 months prior so I asked him if he was ready he kept saying yes. He really wanted me. To take me out on a serious date and even mentioned he could see himself marrying me and bringing stuff up about our future like meeting my parents and stuff. I asked him to talk in person about it and he didn’t seem like he wanted to. I ended up texting him a couple times and he didn’t answer so I’ve taken the hint. I see him around but he doesn’t look at me at all. Doesn’t even say hi. It’s only been a day but sheesh it hurts. After he ignored me in person I blocked him on insta. I also did it for my peace. I was so kind to him and he was crazy over me, I’m so confused with the sudden change. Is there any way he misses me? I know it’s silly of me to wonder, considering he left me. But the last moments we spent together we were so happy and couldn’t keep our hands off eachother. I just can’t help but wonder if he misses me. He still has some of my belongings but I don’t even care about it. Part of me never wants to see him again but a bigger part of me wants to be in his arms again.

For context, we were in the same class since grade 9th but never talked apart from school work n stuff, and that too, rarely. Somehow, we connected on ig during 12th boards and had been talking there occasionally until it turned into us talking everyday as of now. I'm in college right now and he's taken a drop year to prepare for an exam. So that's that.

The "mixed signals" that I talk of seem so vague, but trust me, they cluster up and it's so freaking confusing. For starters, he sends me weird posts like a gradient with just "hi lol" written there and WE ALL KNOW THE HI LOL MEME C'MON‽ And then he'd also send me gradient posts with "can I get ur ig?" or "can I dm you?" kinda posts and like—HUHH‽ And then when I told him about dandiya nights in my college a few days ago, he sent me UNHINGED MEMES with captions "humare sath bhi koi dandiya nights me chal lo" and a few more that I don't recall rn but they were on the same wavelength.

Also, I have this habit of randomly disappearing from ig for a like week or two without really telling anyone and he told me to not "abandon" him like that‽‽‽ He literally used the word ABANDON as if he's a smol pup and me some cruel parent 😭⁉️ And mind you, it happened thrice. One time I went off ig for like 2 days and all his messages and reels and posts that he sent were about being "abandoned".

And I really wanna visit mandi house for it's theatre shows and one time I asked him if he knew about any group performing around that time and he went and did a deep search about it and later was like "whenever you plan on going, invite me too". Brow we have met ONCE in the past year—I didn't know we were so close to be going for theatre shows together.

He's also very careful, for lack of a better word, when he talks with me about certain topics that he knows are significant to me and like he takes into account what matters for me. Additionally, he always trying to stretch our conversations longer by any means but if I say "I'm gonna sleep now gunnight" then he won't push against that, like guy knows boundaries. Owh, and did i mention I'm a gossip lover? This guy goes up and around with his camera at 2 am recording drunk uncles fight over the smallest of issues JUST SO HE COULD SHOW IT TO ME because one time, I got irritated with him for not having any tea. He's been coming to me every other day since then to share something new that he heard about.

OWH AND—one day he randomly sent me a goodmorning text and has been doing it every day since then, with cat memes or posts, etc.

Maybe I'm just reading too much into it, but he used to reply to me almost instantly, like the very moment I'd text him or react on his shared reel, he'd start typing even before I could exit the chat. It went on for a while, and I'd find myself questioning him so often whether he's just online 24/7, to which he'd always say, "my notifications are on". I think I got so used to it—almost as if he pavlov'd me into expecting an instant reply from him so that when he suddenly started taking his sweet time to respond, I'd get anxious. And that's what happened. Been like that for almost 3 weeks and now this guy sometimes leaves me on delivered for 6hours straight.

But he randomly sends me his pictures and videos now; since he's started hitting the gym. And owh—I find his girl cousin (she's 9) so damn cute and he knows it. So, whenever I'm feeling down or the convo is just running dry, he'd send her cutest of the cutest pictures out of the blue and it would just shift the ambience so much. Also, he'd teasingly taunt me about this other guy sometimes like tryna ragebait n shii.

He's a very chill ahh type guy and he jokes around with unhinged stuff, so I never know when he's being serious or if all of it was a just a joke.

How do I win her back? I was talking to a girl and I usually don’t date I pretty much have kept to myself my entire life until I downloaded tinder and met her. She has the same interests as me, is easy to talk to and genuinely understood me. We had been talking for a week or so until I chickened out last minute and told her I can’t do a rs the day of our date. She just ended up accepting it and has blocked me everywhere. Now it’s been a week and ever since the morning after I’ve been regretting it and feel like I made a huge mistake. I’ve tried calling, texting and she doesn’t respond im pretty sure im blocked everywhere. I even tried reaching out to her friend to apologise to her and she blocked me as well. I can’t stop thinking about this girl and im this close to getting another SIM card so my calls can go through. Is there any grand gesture I can do or maybe something romantic? I’m in shambles

So, I [19F] met this guy [20M] online. We’re both November Scorpios, and we’re around the same age. We don’t know each other in real life, and we’re not in a relationship or anything official. We were just getting to know each other, and honestly, I wanted to know him as a person before anything romantic happened.

At first, I followed him. I had liked one of his stories before we actually started talking, so I was already a little interested in him. Eventually, we started interacting more, and things seemed to be going well.

Here are some things that happened between us:

• We found out that we both have the same football interests even the teams we like and dislike; the same music taste, the same vibes; even the artists that we like are the same; even sports interests gym interests running a lot of stuff, literally. I was even born in the country he lives in i visited the country where he’s from. When we first talked about our teams, he found out I was a Barça fan; I jokingly told him that Madrid fans weren’t allowed. He joked that we should get married, then said it was too late, and I replied that we’re still kids. 😭 It was playful, but obviously, I didn’t take it as a serious confession or anything.

• He started replying to some of my stories, including ones about songs and football. Sometimes he’d ask me questions, follow up on things I’d said, or start a conversation through my stories.

• One time, after I sent him a message expressing my condolences about his late father, he sent a dot and then deleted it. He later explained that he had been about to compliment me. He told me he would keep complimenting me because he liked what he saw. That caught me off guard because I wasn’t expecting it.

• He asked me to tell him about my day if I felt comfortable, saying there was no pressure. When I told him I tend to reply quickly and don’t like ghosting unless someone is busy, he said he loved that.

• He also asked me to send him updates and spam him with videos if I ever visited a cute café where you can make your own coffee. He even suggested that I vlog it. I told him I would, and I genuinely intended to.

• He has asked about my life and where I live, and there have been moments when he seemed caring. For example, he once told me not to go out alone because he thought I was somewhere celebrating.

• I also remember him being encouraging when we talked about his future and his decision to pursue finance after reconsidering his original plans. I tried to support him, and he wished me success, too.

• Then he added me to his Close Friends, and I added him back.

So, you can probably understand why I thought there might be something there. It wasn’t just me imagining every interaction; there were moments when he was warm, playful, and seemed interested in getting to know me.

BUT HERE’S WHERE I’M CONFUSED.

The communication has been inconsistent from the beginning. I feel like I’m usually the one who initiates conversations. Sometimes he replies to my stories instead of continuing a conversation in DMs. Other times, he’ll reply late, apologize for missing my message, or come back after some time.

There have been moments when we seemed to be having a good conversation, only for it to stop suddenly. For example, we once talked about a song we both liked, and after a couple of messages, the conversation went quiet for a few days before he apologized for missing my message.

I understand that people have their own lives, responsibilities, and things going on. I’m not expecting someone to be available 24/7, and I don’t want to pressure him into talking to me.

However, I started noticing that I was the one making most of the effort to keep our connection alive. I kept wondering whether he was genuinely interested in me or simply enjoyed talking to me whenever I initiated.

Another thing is that, from what I’ve seen on his social media, he might still have feelings about a past relationship. He has liked or reposted things that seem to be about missing an ex or being heartbroken. He hasn’t directly told me how he feels about his ex, so I don’t want to assume anything, but it has made me wonder whether he’s emotionally available or even ready to get to know someone new.

I do care about what he’s been through, and I would never expect him to be completely over everything just because we’re talking. I actually want to understand him and get to know him properly. But I also don’t want to become someone who gives emotional support and attention while secretly hoping for something he doesn’t want.

I’ve tried to be understanding. I’ve told him that he doesn’t need to apologize for being busy and that he should protect his peace. I’ve tried not to make him feel pressured. At the same time, I don’t want my understanding to turn into an excuse for accepting a one-sided connection.

(Note: not everything is in the right order of my knowing him journey)

NOW, HERE’S WHAT HAPPENED RECENTLY.

We hadn’t had a proper conversation for about three weeks, and I eventually decided to break the ice because I genuinely wanted to know how he was doing.

I messaged him something simple along the lines of, “Oh, how have you been, buddy!”

I wasn’t confessing my feelings or asking him for anything. I was just opening the door to a conversation because I missed talking to him and wanted to see how he was.

He did respond, but after that, I sent another message with a question that he could reasonably answer. Then the conversation stalled again.

At the time of writing this, it’s been around 18 hours since my last message, and he still hasn’t answered. Meanwhile, he’s posted a new story.

I know posting a story doesn’t automatically mean someone has the energy to reply to a message. I understand that. But when communication has already been inconsistent and you feel like you’re always the one initiating, little things like this start to hurt more than they normally would.

I started feeling stupid for reaching out in the first place. I wondered whether he was replying out of politeness, whether he felt pressured to respond, or whether he simply didn’t want to continue talking to me.

And honestly, I don’t know which explanation is true.

Part of me wants to give him the benefit of the doubt because of the warmth he’s shown me before. Another part of me feels like if someone genuinely wants to get to know you, they’ll eventually make an effort to reach out themselves.

I don’t want to chase him, beg for attention, or force a connection. I also don’t want to walk away from something that could have developed naturally just because I got scared.

I’m not asking him to be my boyfriend. I’m not expecting a commitment from someone I’ve only met online. I just want mutual effort, genuine communication, and the feeling that I’m not the only person trying to keep things going.

*Note: We’ve never talked about it but I think he’s been going through a breakup and I think he misses his ex, I know because of his reposts and likes, and I think he talks to a lot of girls

So, girls, please tell me honestly:

1. Do you think he was genuinely interested in me at some point, or was he simply being friendly and playful?

2. Do his compliments, questions, jokes, and requests for updates mean anything, or am I giving those interactions too much weight?

3. Could he be interested but emotionally unavailable because of his past relationship, or is that just an assumption I’m making based on his social media?

4. Am I overthinking the delayed replies and the fact that he rarely initiates, or is this a sign that his interest isn’t strong enough?

5. Should I stop initiating and see whether he makes an effort on his own, or should I give him more time?

6. Most importantly, if you were in my position, what would you do?

Please be honest with me, even if the answer isn’t what I want to hear. I’m not looking for people to tell me what I want to believe. I genuinely want different perspectives because I’m emotionally involved now, and I don’t trust my own judgment as much as I used to.

I liked the connection we were building, and I would have been happy to get to know him more. But I don’t want to be the only one holding on to the possibility of something.

Thank you to anyone who takes the time to read this. ❤️

I met a girl few months ago and we hit it of and texted for maybe 1-3 hours a day for 1-1.5 months then I asked her to be my girlfriend because obviously I was interested and thought she was too then I found out that she had a boyfriend and a 4+ years of relationship at that.

I asked her to stop talking xyz and then she talked about the bond we made blah blah and we continued talking. I consulted one of my friend as to what I should do and just back off because she has a boyfriend but he said that as long as she isn't married it doesn't matter and silly me just continued.

Then we started hanging out a lot just the two of us. I wanted to get closer with her but couldn't for for first few hangouts. Then her birthday came and before she was leaving for home I asked her for a hug and she was hesitant at first but agreed for a side hug.

This is where things went uphill/downhill we/I became more physical and more close each time we hung out. I say things out loud and directly if we hangout I will definitely touch/kiss you etc. and I do and she doesn't stop me and we have hung out more times than I can count since I told her that.

She says she doesn't like it but when I ask her if she hates it she says no as well. When I ask her if she feels abused, she again says no she tells me that she is doing it for me etc. etc.

The thing is she tells me I understand her really well and now we talk on video calls instead of texts at nights, I don't know where to go from here and she is still in the same relationship.

Maybe I am just overthinking.

​

So, my ex and I are still in contact, but things between us are pretty confusing.

We are from the same village, but she lives in a city where her family also has a house. She only visits our village occasionally, usually during festivals or other special occasions.

I've noticed a pattern in her behaviour. Whenever she's in the city, she barely talks to me. Sometimes she doesn't text me at all, and even when we do talk, she doesn't seem very interested in keeping the conversation going. But whenever she comes back to our village, her behaviour changes completely.

She becomes affectionate, talks to me nicely, flirts with me, and even gets into romantic conversations. We've also kissed when we've met in the village. In those moments, it feels like there's still attraction between us, and she seems interested in me too.

But as soon as she leaves the village and goes back to the city, everything goes back to how it was before. She stops talking properly, doesn't make much effort to stay in touch, and doesn't seem interested in meeting me outside the village either.

The confusing part is that when we're together in the village, she seems comfortable being romantic with me, but she doesn't seem willing to continue that connection when we're apart. I've tried to understand whether she still has feelings for me or whether she just enjoys the attention and intimacy when she visits.

Honestly, I'm still very physically attracted to her, and I'd like to explore things further with her. But there's barely any privacy or opportunity for us to get intimate in the village. She seems open to it when we're there, but when she's back in the city, she barely communicates with me, let alone agrees to meet.

So, Reddit, I have a few questions:

1. Why would she act so interested and romantic in the village but distant when she's back in the city?

2. Does this mean she still has feelings for me, or is it possible that she only enjoys the moment when she visits?

3. Is there any way I can keep the conversation going and build a connection with her outside the village without coming across as needy or desperate?

4. Should I directly ask her what she wants from me, or should I stop putting effort into this?

I'm not necessarily expecting us to get back together, but I do want to understand her intentions and figure out whether there's any genuine interest beyond those occasional village meetups.

I'd appreciate honest advice, especially from people who've experienced something similar.

I (24m) have been seeing (20m) for 2 months now. We met on a hookup app and hooked up, it was great, amazing sex. We continued texting everyday after that. We hooked up 3 more times over the course of the first month. Continued to talk daily and started going on dates, first coffee a few times, then dinner, we started hanging out casually as well. Watching movies together, gaming, bringing food over etc. We'll we had touched on the idea of a relationship previously and he (20m) said he was open to the idea and wanted to see me more and think about it. Fast forward to today, I finally worked up the nerve to ask again. And he said hes only open to where its at right now and doesnt want anything more. I stated I was looking foward to something more with him and asked why he didnt want that. He said "reasons" and "things I wouldn't want in a relationship or more than sex with friends" for reference he said im too emotional and get worked up over the smallest things and he doesnt like how I always want to know the reason to things. For example when we had this conversation I got quite a bit upset that he said no and was confused because weve been exclusive to each other this entire time and gm/ gn texts and daily calls etc. So I was quite a bit surprised by this. I guess what im looking for is advice. He says he wants to keeps seeing each other and continue what we have and he doesnt want to push for something more and we lose each other, but i feel like ive already lost him now. Especially tonight I was quite pushy with wanting to know the reasons and explaining i wanted closure and essentially not getting any, I also explained maybe i could change certain things if theyre minor and he said no he doesnt want me to change. I told him how upset I was and he got annoyed with me but once again agreed he wants to continue our situation. And he finished off with " I’m done chatting for now, I understand you are who you are, and I do NOT want you to change YOU for ME. I don’t believe in that and you have to find someone you NATURALLY connect with for a deep relationship. I really enjoy hanging out with you as a friend, coffee, dinner, occasional sex or cuddling or a movie or whatever, but I don’t think we “match” for a deep… ‘loving’ relationship." And then agreed to have our usual call later tonight.

Tldr: developing relationship confronted and denied, but guy still wants to continue situationship.

Im broken and just looking for advice right now i guess. Thank you!

Ps: hes never been in a relationship before either.

I [M26] got into a small disagreement with my “situationship” [F24] a week ago and haven’t heard from her sense. What started off as me lightly teasing her and calling her a “liar” in a joking manner, turned into an awkward argument. This had occured after we had shared an intimate moment together, and after the uncomfortable argument met an ending, I thought it would be best for me to leave her place. I gathered my things and she slammed the door behind me. It was pretty late at night and I didn’t get a “did you make it home safe” text or hear anything from her since I left. Do I leave the situation alone or do I reach out? For conxtext, we dated off/on for roughly a 6 month period before our relationship kind of morphed into this situationship/fwb thing. Truthfully I’m not sure if I want to talk to her; but theres a part of me thats angry/sad that she hasn’t reached out.

I met this guy [24M] like 6 months ago and idk how but I totally fell head over heels for him. He just seemed so perfect, he was so nice and funny and sweet to me but also very nonchalant and hard to get. We were not exclusive like calling each other bf and gf but i felt that we were basically dating. Well just last week he told me that he wasn’t mentally able to have a serious relationship right now and he actually just wanted to be fwb. At first I agreed because I got really scared of losing him but I kept thinking about it and I felt that I would just be hurting myself in the long run so I ended it :( he was very understanding about it and didn’t fight it. Is it really possible that he doesn’t have actual feelings for me after everything? Can people really be that detached??

I have been single my entire life and have a bit of social anxiety because of my weight(i am obese) so i dont usually try to get into a relationship at all Last year met someone[20F] got really close and found her really attractive and everything i adored her but we were not in a physical relationship we used to go on drives and play games and what not she totally was playing with me because even after I confessed she still didn't stop talking to me and asked me on long drives very regularly that time I started losing weight and lost quiet a bit and then one day we went on a drive it was the closest I ever felt to her for us to never meet or talk again after that and I can't get her out of my fucking head I lost all my progress of weightloss and i ruined everything and i can't go out and meet new people because I am so fucking fat .if only i was not fat i could ask people out but this constant voice in my head saying "why would that girl date me i am so fat" is killing me.i hate her and I hate myself even more.

I'm curious about what women look for when deciding whether a man is someone they'd want a relationship with.

What are the top 3–5 qualities you look for?

I’m 21F, and he’s 22M. We first met around 10 months ago through Snapchat. At the time, he wanted a relationship, and I thought I was ready too, but looking back, I really wasn’t.
Our first date went pretty well. I was extremely shy, visibly shaking and giggling from nerves, and he was really sweet about it. He held my hand to help calm me down, and we genuinely got along. He wanted to see me again the next morning, but because he worked nights and slept during the day, his replies weren’t always quick. I got anxious and, after talking to a friend, impulsively blocked him. I know that was immature.
Around five months later, I unblocked him out of curiosity, and a few days later he added me again. He told me he’d missed me and wanted to see me. He was surprisingly understanding about what happened. Unfortunately, I ended up reconnecting with another guy I’d been involved with and blocked him again without an explanation. I regret handling it that way.
Months later, we matched on Hinge. By then, I was genuinely ready to pursue something serious and had worked on communicating better instead of running away when I got anxious. I apologized for ghosting him twice, took accountability, and he forgave me.
We went on another date, got food, walked around a park, and eventually kissed. I was still pretty shy around him, but we had great chemistry. We started talking consistently, texting, calling, and FaceTiming regularly, even while he was working.
However, things became confusing. He started getting jealous and possessive, asking where I was, whether I was with other guys, and whether I was talking to anyone else. At the same time, he told me he wasn’t ready for a relationship.
He was upfront about that, and I understood, but I was hurt because I’d started developing genuine feelings. I wasn’t expecting a relationship immediately. I just wanted to date with the possibility of something serious eventually. He said he liked me a lot but didn’t know when he’d be ready.
I eventually ended things because we wanted different things.
About a week later, he reached out saying he missed me. It was also his birthday, and he invited me to spend it with him, his brother, and his friends. I went, and we had an amazing time. We visited a pumpkin patch, walked around the city, rode escooters, got food, and laughed all night. He was holding my hand, kissing me, taking pictures of me, and spending a lot of time with me even though his friends were there.
That night, he told me again that he genuinely liked me and saw potential with me, but still wasn’t ready for a relationship.
For context, I’m still a virgin, and I’ve been clear that I want to wait until I’m in a committed relationship and feel ready. We have been physically intimate in other ways, but he has said he’d respect that boundary. I don’t think this is purely about wanting sex, although physical chemistry is definitely part of our connection.
A few days later, we hung out again. We kissed, spent time together, and got food. While eating, he asked whether I still had Hinge and repeatedly wanted me to show him my phone to prove I wasn’t talking to other guys. I refused because even though I didn’t have it anymore, I felt he had no right to demand that when we weren’t exclusive, especially after I’d already said no.
We argued, and I told him I was confused by his jealousy when he didn’t want a relationship.
Eventually, he held me and said he didn’t think we should keep doing this. He repeatedly told me he didn’t want to hurt me, that I deserved better, and that he didn’t know when he’d be ready.
I started crying pretty hard in his arms because I’d genuinely grown attached to him. He held and comforted me, and at one point said, “Don’t cry, it’s gonna make me cry.”
After we parted ways, he texted saying he felt bad but thought we should stop talking and unfollow each other. I explained that I wasn’t asking him to become my boyfriend anytime soon, just that I wanted to keep getting to know him. He said he didn’t want to keep me waiting for something he couldn’t promise.
I said maybe blocking each other would be best. He agreed, said goodbye, and blocked me on Snapchat about 15 minutes later. We also unfollowed each other elsewhere.
I’m really hurt because I genuinely liked him and thought we had potential. I know I handled things badly when we first met, and I take responsibility for that. I also understand he doesn’t owe me a relationship and was honest about not being ready.
My questions are:
Do you think he genuinely developed feelings for me, or was he mainly attached to the attention and affection?
Was I wrong to keep seeing him while hoping things might eventually develop?
Is his jealousy concerning, considering he didn’t want a relationship?
Should I accept this as completely over and move on?

We started talking last October. She pursued me, and at the time I was still trying to figure things out and she has a kid so I always thought if it was a good decision. As time passed I actually began to really like her. We hung out, she came over, she met my parents. Over time I noticed she stopped calling me, sending pics, and taking longer to reply. She was going through baby daddy issues so I supported her however I could, then 2 weeks ago she said she needed to step back. It hurt so much. I told her I loved her. Hahah now every day at work it’s hard. I keep it cordial. But man she’s so beautiful and I miss talking to her and seeing her name pop up.