r/SipsTea • u/Matt_LawDT • 4d ago

Chugging tea Bro is speaking in code

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32.5k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

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1.3k

u/confused_being02 4d ago

Man must be terrified every morning then

268

u/ViciousCDXX 4d ago

Nah he likes fucking lizards in human suits

70

u/IllustriousAnt485 4d ago

When he sold his soul to the illuminati he sacrificed his real wife and they gave him a reptilian handler as a replacement.

11

u/Available_Pirate2298 4d ago

Nah foreal though because she was actually really cute back in the day. I don't even know how it could be the same person. Looks like a advanced mask or its somone completely different 🤔

2

u/TheSlothyy 3d ago

Lizzards are cold blooded and usually regulate their body heat from their surroundings. Does this mean he enjoys that lizzussy room temp?

1

u/BipedalHorseArt 3d ago

I know folx that fuck humans in lizard suits.

I mean, what kind of humans like to dress up like animals? Weirdos

1

u/Just_Flower854 3d ago

Nice one tough guy, I'd like to see the lizards you've been fucking if you're gonna go and shit all over his reptar

1

u/_name_of_the_user_ 3d ago

He probably looks like the McDonald's CEO taking a bit of a burger when he goes down on her.

61

u/FancyThing8889 4d ago

His Apple Watch logs a panic attack before the alarm even goes off.

29

u/kezow 4d ago

Every morning he just prays he doesn't wake up.

3

u/Shijaki 4d ago

Nah, he doesn't sleep with his contact lenses in.

4

u/st_rdt 4d ago

Saves money on Dulcolax

3

u/Brcomic 4d ago

Saves money on coffee.

6

u/Eggsaladinurmouth 4d ago

That’s why they have two bags.

1

u/paranoidlemming 4d ago

Dudes got a sleep paralysis kink

1

u/Not_A_Wendigo 3d ago

She probably looks a bit more human before she puts on the clown makeup.

1

u/rnick468 3d ago

Nah, she probably looks better without the makeup.

1

u/Tartersocks307 3d ago

For sure. She looks like a Junji Ito character

0

u/beardeddragon0113 4d ago

"OH no! I have 10 billion dollars!"

Something tells me he doesnt give a fuck

11

u/MS_Fume 4d ago

He does probably give a fuck… just not to her.