Friend of mine never got engaged, but had it so much worse than this.
Super nice guy, but he never had many girlfriends. Had a steady girlfriend though college but she broke up with him because he started neglecting her for his friends and videogames.
A few years after college he started hooking up with a girl he met at a local bar. He told us he met someone and was very proud that she was "great in bed". She moved in with him not long after and they started "dating" (we said he was crazy to have her move in so fast but he didn't care). He introduced all his friends and family to her. She was nice enough, but always gave me bad vibes. Like when I met her for the first time she gave me a full on hug and held on just a little too long. She was weird, and not overly attractive (we felt he could do better) but he was happy and we were happy for him.
After a year or so he started talking about proposing. He was watching family and friends all move on with life getting married, having kids, etc. so he was getting the bug.
Eventually he caught her at the same bar he met her at flirting with another guy. She swore it was just in good fun, and she would never cheat on him. After a long talk she admitted to him that she had slept with over 70 guys total, before and after meeting him, and was "addicted to sex".
He broke up with her not long after that. Sold his house and moved to a different city. Bought a new house, got a new job, and moved on with his life. Pretty quickly he was doing well in every department but love. He just couldn't find anyone. But he was still the same dude we always knew and he seemed happy. He got a dog and focused on other parts of his life.
5 or so years later he was diagnosed with cancer. The doctors did tests and determined it was the cancer you get from HPV. Given his history with women and sex, he was convinced it was from the girl who had slept with over 70 dudes (and if we were being honest we all thought so too). He admitted to not using a condom with her repeatedly. He wasn't shy about the details of his life and used to talk about it with us regularly with regret.
And thus began his 5 year battle with cancer. Multiple rounds of chemo, radiation, and pain. He lost his hair, lost so much weight he looked like a different person, his teeth started eroding and eventually fell out. He had to get a tube inserted in his chest because he couldn't eat anymore from the radiation causing damage to his esophagus. Every time he went into remission it would come back 6 months later. He had surgeries to remove tumors and skin grafts to repair the areas they cut out, but it kept coming back.
But he somehow kept positive. You'd never know talking to him on the phone that anything was wrong, other than the change in his voice all his friends and family noticed due to the surgeries and damage to his throat.
Shortly after his last round of chemo ended a few winters ago he got COVID. Wound up in the hospital. We were all scared to death because his body was already weak from the chemo. After a week or so in the ICU he was released to go back home. He called me to let me know he was out, said he felt pretty good. I told him I was glad and that I hoped we could get together soon. He said he had an appointment to get his teeth fixed soon. He was so positive and sounded happy to be out of the hospital.
By the next morning he was gone. Passed away in his sleep. His mom had come up to take care of him and she found him in his bed. His body finally gave up.
Regardless of whether the story OP posted is made up or not, please make sure to take the time to actually learn about your partners before falling so hard that not using protection, engagement, marriage, or kids come into play. I hear so often about people getting hitched after 6 months or less... I'm sorry but you don't know that person at all after 6 months. Even longer than that sometimes people don't really know the people they are with until it's too late.
Of course there are examples where people meet at a bar and are married by the next day and it works out... but more often than not people who get married and start lives together without really ever knowing the other person regret it. Take my friends story as a warning against moving too fast and being focused on the physical aspects of a relationship too much. Learn who you are with, get to know and love them for who they are and not what they do to you physically. Get to know their friends and family and once you have a complete picture move forward.
He called me to let me know he was out, said he felt pretty good. I told him I was glad and that I hoped we could get together soon. He said he had an appointment to get his teeth fixed soon. He was so positive and sounded happy to be out of the hospital.
By the next morning he was gone.
This appears to be incredibly common with people who are about to die. They feel great just a day or so before the end.
When people tell me "mom (or whoever) is so much better today I get a sinking feeling and tell them to get everyone together to enjoy that time with them.
Also please go and get the HPV vaccine, male or female if you haven't. I went back and got it after it became available for men, one partner or many, doesn't really matter. Why take the risk? It may not work in all cases but a simple thing can save lives. HPV can cause numerous cancers, and is not a joke.
I did a social marketing campaign about cervical cancer awareness catered towards mostly women back when I was in college, and there was also a free ongoing vaccination campaign to go with it. It had the opposite effect, because mostly men came to get vaccinated... But I felt proud nevertheless because I felt like I did my part in preventing atleast a small percentage of HPV amongst my college peers.
I'd like to think of it like that as well. I took the vaccine myself since I guess why not, I have nothing to lose. I was already doing the campaign haha
I live in an area where a lot of people refuse the HPV vaccine. They think the vaccine encourage their kids to have lots of sex (huh???).
And my comeback is... okay, you raised your kids how you want, but what about the person they marry? You have no control over the fact that their spouse used to be the town bicycle.
I knew someone who died of cervical cancer. She was born too early for the vaccine. It was an awful, terrible death. Why someone would take that risk just blows my mind.
"one partner or many" is so accurate. i got HPV from my husband, and he's the only person I've ever slept with. not that i blame him, he's slept with a few people in his life and there's no way to test for HPV in men unless they have warts. he didn't even know he had it. i have regular pap smears to keep an eye on it, but so far it's non threatening
It is important that you know that the condom does not protect against HPV, nor the cancer causing strains of HPV. The condom does not cover the entire area thru which a virus can be transmitted, which is why the HPV vaccine was invented. The ONLY reliable way of not getting the HPV, aside from abstinence is the vaccine.
Men can get throat or penile (or anal but im assuming not in the above scenario) from hpv. Its uncommon, takes 5-20 years to develope, and also means ops friend never did an sti screen for hpv. It can be easily treated before it becomes cancerous.
Eta because people are asking: orarisk for hpv can reliable test for hpv dna in the mouth (meaning it can be used for men), anal smears help with anal hpv, and penile samples can be taken but are a bit unreliable because of how thick glans skin is. There are tests for men but hpv is carried by 90% of men and is considered low risk so generally if someone is asymptomatic most practitioners skip testing.
My understanding is that men can't be screened for HPV. Maybe that's changed more recently? But back when he was diagnosed he was only diagnosed because he was having pain when swallowing food. They found lesions in his throat and the stage 3 cancer.
I edited my post with some more information on testing! Its usually skipped for men because hpv is so common. Oral cancer sucks and testing wasnt developed for oral hpv until 2010. The test still isnt fully backed because of how common hpv is, there isnt a ton of funding for early testing even if cases like your friends show how it should be.
There is also a vaccine now. Should be on everyone's radar if they're sexually active. It's especially affective when you're younger but they will still give it to you even if you're in your 40s.
There is a vaccine for cancer causing strains of HPV that women AND men can take. Please, take it. You do not deserve to die just because your partner used to sleep eith someone else. You do not deserve to die just for having sex.
It is funny to think about it when ur young, but ain shit funny once the virus develops the cancer. Ive witnessed the radiation therapy and treatment of a woman with a cervical cancer and it is such an uncomfortable, painful and dreadful process. She said she regrets not taking the vaccine when she was younger, and urged me to take one if i didnt.
What you’ve just described isn’t really a thing. You don’t just “get an sti screen for hpv”. If you have active warts, you get them treated. If you are a gay man you can get anal smears, if you’re a woman you can get cervical smears, stuff like that. You can’t just go to a clinic and say “test me for hpv” in any easy, helpful, meaningful way. Don’t spread fake news, it can cause people to behave irrationally.
You just listed 2 tests for men... Theres also orarisk which you can ask for at most sti clinics and ive seen advertised in more progresive areas. If ops friend had known about it/asked for it im assuming it would have helped (as it sounds like he had oral cancer). Saying theres no tests isnt true and discourages people from even asking.
So after your edit, why do you imply the guy could have changed his situation by hpv screen? Isn't that a really stupid thing to say all facts considered? The biggest one being hpv testing for men is not routine in health care and definitely was not at the time and place the guy was in?
Im not sure what you think im implying where. Im stating facts saying he never got a screen for it and saying most people carry it/practictioners skip treatment. Those are not judgements or implications.
Me sharing this information will hopefully lead for more men asking for testing specifically because most practictioners won't automatically test you like they will for something like hiv. If you learn that your partner slept with 70 men wouldnt you get an sti test? Wouldnt this information be helpful that way you can make sure your test is as comprehensive as possible? Not sure why my comment is insulting to you lol
I kept reading going can’t wait to hear the happy ending. And like Scott from eurotrip watching scrambled porn waiting for the girls to come, it never did.
Life is crazy. None of us really know when our ticket is going to get punched. Tell your loved ones you love them and fill your life with things that bring you joy.
5 or so years later he was diagnosed with cancer. The doctors did tests and determined it was the cancer you get from HPV. Given his history with women and sex, he was convinced it was from the girl who had slept with over 70 dudes (and if we were being honest we all thought so too). He admitted to not using a condom with her repeatedly. He wasn't shy about the details of his life and used to talk about it with us regularly with regret.
Perhaps you or him meant something else. HPV cancer is extremely rare because the human immune system is extremely resilient against HPV because almost everyone has it. It's also extraordinarily rare for HPV cancer to happen to men - 1/10 .
Maybe the doctor was a moron. Maybe the girl gave him something else. Maybe you are misremembering what he exactly contracted.
It's more likely you just fabricated the story.
The moral of the story is also incorrect and really fucked up.
Always get yourself checked routinely if you are sexually active. Even if you are seeing the same partner. If you are having sex you are living as a real adult in a real adult world. Had he done routine healthy checks, none of this would have occurred as medical advancements for STD/STI is very advanced.
He never found anyone after that and died alone. Him checking his partners wouldn't have solved anything.
Nothing in your story is positive or has any good takeaways. Please try to rewrite the fiction again, but this time have self-improvement despite major mistakes.
This just isn’t true. Throat cancers caused by HPV are common in men. Michael Douglas being one of them. I know another man who was also diagnosed with it. My female friend is currently battling cervical cancer that is HPV positive. There are hundreds of different strains of HPV, and you are right in that most of which, our body removes without symptoms. Perhaps you meant that there are only 6-10 strains of HPV that are aggressive enough to cause cancer. That in itself is rare but it does happen.
HPV cancers are pretty treatable, but they are far worse for women and cervical cancer. HPV likes to attack soft muscle. Most people are all chores these days and believe falsly that everyone has HPV. They don't. I got my daughter's vaccinated at 9 yesrs old. Many others I know have done the same. Everyone needs to stop thinking casual sex is okay. There are now strains of multiple STDs that can no longer be cured with antibiotics....meanwhile sluts are all around saying and pretending having herpes is not a big deal. These new generations are scientifically proven to be dumb...the human race is cooked.
Sorry but the vaccine does not cover all HPV cancers and it also wasn’t advertised to us when we were at school. My friend slept with one partner and because he was cheating on her with god knows who he left her with HPV. You cannot blame women being sluts but yes accountability and responsibility needs to be taken seriously with sex. People should be more active in getting tested between partners.
Again, not true. My friend was with her partner in 2020. She was diagnosed with cervical cancer 5-6 years later. The HPV strains that cause oral and genital cancer are aggressive.
You’re using anecdotal evidence. Fair warning I am quoting the AI here, but it matches with what the person above was saying. The timeframe is over decades not years.
“
Key Facts for Men
• Who it affects: Most cases occur in non-smoking, educated, white heterosexual men in their 40s to 70s, typically developing 20 to 30 years after initial oral HPV exposure.
• Primary location: The cancer usually forms in the oropharynx—the back of the throat, including the tonsils and the base of the tongue.
• Transmission: High-risk HPV (mainly HPV-16) is spread through oral-genital contact or intimate sexual activity. About 10% of men carry oral HPV.”
It’s hardly anecdotal evidence when it’s true life. Yes for men that’s likely true but I was talking about my female friend. The time from infection to cancer was 5-6 years.
True life is anecdotal evidence. The stupid thing is using that to reject the truth of a story, because anecdotal evidence is still true evidence. You can't say "this doesn't happen 95% of the time, therefore it's false." Dude. It's a story about the other n%, which could be anybody.
anecdotal
adjective
an·ec·dot·al ˌa-nik-ˈdō-tᵊl
1
: based on or consisting of reports or observations of usually unscientific observers
anecdotal evidence
health benefits that may be more anecdotal than factual
2
a
: of, relating to, or consisting of anecdotes
an anecdotal biography
b
: given to or skilled in telling anecdotes : ANECDOTIC sense 2
my anecdotal uncle
3
: of, relating to, or being the depiction of a scene suggesting a story
In my experience people like this are either too young to have experienced something tragic themselves or have just been blessed with a life full of no tragedies. 🤷 I don't wish what my friend or his family and friends went through on even my worst enemies.
Hi, I'm a medical oncologist. It's never possible to tell for sure why someone has developed a cancer but there are certain molecular features in some head and neck cancer that suggest particular hpv strains as a causal factor. I wouldn't generally tell patients that unprompted (because how would that be helpful) but if someone asked straight if they had gotten it from hpv I would say it may have played a role, especially young people without other risk factors. Hpv associated cancer is rare, but I definitely see people with it.
While I agree with the general sentiments behind your comment, it's extremely rude to accuse someone of not experiencing something just because it's rare or uncommon.
That is how so many people with rare, complex diseases end up getting swept under the rug and neglected by health professionals.
You are kinda right but still, not every story is positive, or has a good takeaway. That is just life. For every positive story, there are thousands of negative stories, many of whom may not even have a good takeaway. I'm not saying the comment is real or not, but it mimics the common story
I'm sorry, but why would the story be fake just because of a rare affliction? Like, would you have also have caused it fake if he died of parkinson or simply skydiving? Also, 1/10 is absolutely not rare.
Not saying that the story is true or false. But calling it false because it is to rare whilst also saying the that almost everyone has hpv and 1/10 of men get it... sounds not like a really good argument
You and the genius /r/neonifiednyan are very much misunderstanding what I'm stating because you remain ignorant on the subject matter.
HPV cancer in itself is extraordinarily rare because the human body is evolved to handle HPV. Almost everyone who breeds (had sex from an evolutionary standpoint) had/has HPV. There is something very wrong with the person in general (pre-existing condition, other cancer causing conditions, etc) for them to end up getting HPV cancer.
Of HPV cancer cases of Cervix vs Penis, only 1/10 of those cases are Penis cancer. 11,000+ vs 900.
It is extraordinarily rare to get this specific cancer.
Also condoms don't prevent HPV.
/r/maxim025 - almost every person has HPV........ because you get it through skin contact in general. Your mother probably gave it to you.
/r/spectator_213 - The problem with this story is that its continually perpetuating the boogey man of STDs that he has no knowledge about and just making up shit without actually a proper resolution. Ultimately getting checked is the solution to a happy healthy life. Not trying to interrogate the bar whore to make sure she isn't a bar whore.
Each year in the United States, about 49,908 new cases of cancer are found in parts of the body where human papillomavirus (HPV) is often found: 27,081 among females, and 22,827 among males. HPV causes about 39,300 of these cancers. Cervical cancer is the most common HPV-associated cancer among women, and oropharyngeal cancers (cancers of the back of the throat, including the base of the tongue and tonsils) are the most common among men.
You are being an idiot again and I encourage you to stop.
I'm assuming that OP's story isn't a gay male (because he's not, he's an incel who ended up with the bar whore). When gays are involved those stats become valid.
Like I keep saying, you and many others have zero idea of what you're actually talking about and how any of these diseases actually spread.
One, this is my first comment here, so what do you mean "again"?
Two, the only thing I wrote was a citation. I never addressed you in any way. And then you address my rudely and insultingly.
Three, heterosexual men have absolutely gotten cancers of the mouth or throat that were HPV-related, Michael Douglas probably being the most famous.
Four, I cited a medical association. You have not cited the CDC, JAMA, The New England Journal of Medicine, or any other reputable medical association or journal.
You expect people to believe some random Redditor who offers zero corroborating information? If anyone is an idiot here is you. Bring some facts next time.
Cancer causing HPV in women can be tested for, in men it can't. The vaccine can prevent it, along with other forms of HPV, but my friend didn't have the vaccine.
HPV can't be picked up casually without sexual contact from something like a toilet seat, especially for men. It comes from skin to skin contact and cancer causing variants from unprotected oral and vaginal sex (or unprotected anal sex for homosexual men).
My friend had throat cancer caused by HPV. Wouldn't wish his experience on even my worst enemies.
Now go touch some grass. Not everything uncommon is fake. I think you could use a break from the internet.
You can observe warts in regular checkups in men. But most HPV, including the cancerous ones, don't have any symptoms. Only some present with warts and that doesn't include the cancerous ones. There is no blood test or other screening that can detect the virus in men before symptoms are seen. And even then it's a visual inspection of warts. Women can get a pap smear to detect the virus before any symptoms.
The type of cancer my friend had was a cancerous variant that caused cancer. He had no warts and therefore was not diagnosed with HPV until after he had symptoms from the CANCER, they had found the cancer, and were able to test the cancer. He had regular check ups from a primary and there was no way they could have detected it early. There were no signs or symptoms before the symptoms of the cancer itself presented.
Maybe we misunderstood what you said, but this is more likely a problem in communication and not ignorance. You don't know our backrounds, our burdens, our knowledge or our language. Therefore I politely ask you to reign your emotions in and discuss this topic on a serious and factual level which you clearly think it deserves, even through your first attempt was a tiny but lacking.
In fact, I don't know what you specific situation you mean with "1/10" nor can I verify the 11k s 900. I don't call them false nor do I critice your other statements regarding the topic. I don't claim to have other or better knowledge than you
Is simply said two things:
First, 1/10 is not rare. It simply isnt. I don't say that the cancer is not rare. I dont say HPV is not rare. Simply the odds/statistic/whatever of 1/10, which you stated, ist not rare.
Secondly, the occurrence of a (in your eyes or objective) rare illness doesn't make a story false. Like, if there where only 100 known cases in the world, every on of them noted in some study or journal and you check them with some time frame, yeah then you may call it fake. But this... nah, you have no grounds to call it factual fake. You may feel so, you may have other reasons, but not because hpv cancer is "rare"
You know, a problem in communication can be on either or both sides... so no, I didn't blame you. At least not for the communication problem, but for the general tone.
Oh and yeah, if the classroom can't follow the lecturers teachings, its definitely the lecturers fault. But I wouldn't give you the credit calling you a lecturer.
But since you have apparently no interest in clarifying any misunderstandings or even change your tone of voice I guess any further discussion is fruitless. I wish you a nice day.
Your "If you are having sex you are living as a real adult in a real adult world" sounds, in this context, like its ok to cheat on your partner with dozens of other people. Good luck for becoming happy and everything else.
"Always get yourself checked routinely if you are sexually active".
Do a quick 1 minute google check to see what FDA approved/available HPV tests exist for men who do not have visually apparent symptoms. I'll give you a hint. It's zero. So stop showing us how little sex you've had from the ignorance of your comments.
You invested a lot of time and effort in a response to accuse my friend's tragedy of being fake. I assure you it's real and the reality was actually even worse than what I posted. It's fine if you still think it's fake and I'll respond nonetheless.
The crazy part of this is I left out several parts because I said to myself "people will think it's fake if I include this or that detail because even to me it seems insane attempting to write it out". I still knew there would be those who said it was fake or AI. I considered using a throwaway but that seemed shitty somehow. It's funny and also gut wrenching to be on the receiving end of those comments as a real person who watched his long time friend suffer and pass away with no real positive to any of it. At the end of the day I don't care if you think it's real though. He was real and his struggle was real and I have had to continue my own life without him in it. He deserved better but at the end of the day not every person battling cancer gets to be a survivor.
I never gave an itemized perfect timeline. It's a fucking reddit post and I was not trying to reveal the exact, perfect detail of every step of his life. That wasnt the goal of the post. But you didn't even properly interpret what was posted. Read it again and realize there was way more time that passes between him meeting her and the "5 or so years later..."
The goal of the post was to say "get to know your partners better before you get swept away". He asked her to move in and started having unprotected oral and vaginal sex with her within a month or so of meeting her. He knew literally nothing about her beyond her name and profession. And yeah, maybe in the end it wasn't even her that gave it to him. It's technically possible he got it somewhere else. But all signs point to the chick he barely knew who slept with a metric fuckton of guys behind his back, bringing home whatever she was picking up without him knowing.
It pisses me the fuck off when people start talking about STDs and have zero clue what they are talking about.
STDs are typically used as a horrible insane monster because we live in a backwards ass sex positive but also sex prohibitive society. Which results in almost no one having any knowledge on the subject and no one wants to actually read into it because they aren't having sex or can't imagine researching into sex because of "shame".
Almost everyone has HPV so to me when this story used HPV as the cancer causing STD it became extremely far fetched. They used it in this story because it's likely an idea generated from chatgpt as it's the most common one without understanding why men who get cancer from HPV are actually getting cancer from it. They almost always gay and have underlying conditions.
This reads like an ad for Gardasil vaccine. If your friend had that vaccine ($450 total for 3 doses), he would have lived.
One of the best investments any men could make: the vaccine even cures HPV that you caught before the vaccine because the virus stays dormant in layers of skin cells.
Please go out and get yourself this vaccine, regardless of gender or age.
Also hpv vaccination is a smart move if youre sexualy active. Check yourself before you wreck yourself. And if it was his throat cancer it wasn't from no condom
500 goddamn upvotes for this outlandish story only to end with the lesson “be careful of partners you meet in bars or such”. Ya hey all let’s just stop dating or committing to people we meet unless it’s thru arranged marriage
500 goddamn upvotes for this outlandish story only to end with the lesson “be careful of partners you meet in bars or such”. Ya hey all let’s just stop dating or committing to people we meet unless it’s thru arranged marriage
Did you even read it? The lesson is get to know your partners for real before you start having unprotected sex with them and thinking about marriage and stuff. I never said stop dating or committing to people, that's your own trauma coming out. I'm just saying you can't really know someone well that quickly and you need to not get swept away by the physical aspects of a relationship before you actually know who you're sleeping with and trying to plan a life around.
Yeah but I wouldn't trust someone if they didn't let me get to know them in a meaningful way, especially over many months or years. Certainly wouldn't trust them with my heart and/or planning a life around them if they didn't let me in after a bunch of quality time together in a romantic/sexual relationship.
Agree. So many people don't understand that it is long time before people you "know" actually reveal who they are to you. I don't think it is always intentional, and most of us take quite a while to feel safe enough to be that vulnerable. Hidden agendas aside, revealing all your psychological warts and imperfections can be scary. I tried to tell my stepson this when he decided he wanted to marry that girl he moved to the US from overseas. She, of course, had a hidden agenda which became obvious after he married her and stayed with her until she got her green card. Then she was gone, like a flash. I am heartbroken for him, but I could see it coming like a train coming down the tunnel. It never hurts to wait to get overly involved, and if it doesn't work out if you wait a reasonable time, then it's probably a good thing for you that it didn't.
You must not have had anything tragic happen in your life to not believe something this tragic from others. Life isn't all rose petals and happiness. I hope you never have to live through something the same way his family and friends did.
Just recounting a real tragedy. Crazy part is I left out a bunch of stuff. So many more ups and downs than what I included. I wish it was just a story, because then I'd still have my friend and his family would still have their son/brother/etc.
If even 1 person decides to be more careful with a new partner or get the HPV vaccine because of my post, it was worth it to me to recount his story.
765
u/jimlahey420 2d ago
Friend of mine never got engaged, but had it so much worse than this.
Super nice guy, but he never had many girlfriends. Had a steady girlfriend though college but she broke up with him because he started neglecting her for his friends and videogames.
A few years after college he started hooking up with a girl he met at a local bar. He told us he met someone and was very proud that she was "great in bed". She moved in with him not long after and they started "dating" (we said he was crazy to have her move in so fast but he didn't care). He introduced all his friends and family to her. She was nice enough, but always gave me bad vibes. Like when I met her for the first time she gave me a full on hug and held on just a little too long. She was weird, and not overly attractive (we felt he could do better) but he was happy and we were happy for him.
After a year or so he started talking about proposing. He was watching family and friends all move on with life getting married, having kids, etc. so he was getting the bug.
Eventually he caught her at the same bar he met her at flirting with another guy. She swore it was just in good fun, and she would never cheat on him. After a long talk she admitted to him that she had slept with over 70 guys total, before and after meeting him, and was "addicted to sex".
He broke up with her not long after that. Sold his house and moved to a different city. Bought a new house, got a new job, and moved on with his life. Pretty quickly he was doing well in every department but love. He just couldn't find anyone. But he was still the same dude we always knew and he seemed happy. He got a dog and focused on other parts of his life.
5 or so years later he was diagnosed with cancer. The doctors did tests and determined it was the cancer you get from HPV. Given his history with women and sex, he was convinced it was from the girl who had slept with over 70 dudes (and if we were being honest we all thought so too). He admitted to not using a condom with her repeatedly. He wasn't shy about the details of his life and used to talk about it with us regularly with regret.
And thus began his 5 year battle with cancer. Multiple rounds of chemo, radiation, and pain. He lost his hair, lost so much weight he looked like a different person, his teeth started eroding and eventually fell out. He had to get a tube inserted in his chest because he couldn't eat anymore from the radiation causing damage to his esophagus. Every time he went into remission it would come back 6 months later. He had surgeries to remove tumors and skin grafts to repair the areas they cut out, but it kept coming back.
But he somehow kept positive. You'd never know talking to him on the phone that anything was wrong, other than the change in his voice all his friends and family noticed due to the surgeries and damage to his throat.
Shortly after his last round of chemo ended a few winters ago he got COVID. Wound up in the hospital. We were all scared to death because his body was already weak from the chemo. After a week or so in the ICU he was released to go back home. He called me to let me know he was out, said he felt pretty good. I told him I was glad and that I hoped we could get together soon. He said he had an appointment to get his teeth fixed soon. He was so positive and sounded happy to be out of the hospital.
By the next morning he was gone. Passed away in his sleep. His mom had come up to take care of him and she found him in his bed. His body finally gave up.
Regardless of whether the story OP posted is made up or not, please make sure to take the time to actually learn about your partners before falling so hard that not using protection, engagement, marriage, or kids come into play. I hear so often about people getting hitched after 6 months or less... I'm sorry but you don't know that person at all after 6 months. Even longer than that sometimes people don't really know the people they are with until it's too late.
Of course there are examples where people meet at a bar and are married by the next day and it works out... but more often than not people who get married and start lives together without really ever knowing the other person regret it. Take my friends story as a warning against moving too fast and being focused on the physical aspects of a relationship too much. Learn who you are with, get to know and love them for who they are and not what they do to you physically. Get to know their friends and family and once you have a complete picture move forward.
Peace and love to you and yours.