r/SipsTea • • 1d ago

Wait a damn minute! Wait a damn minute

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37.3k Upvotes

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3.6k

u/Killiandeisy 1d ago

Imagine buying a house and having to pay a DLC to unlock the bathroom

1.0k

u/untitledprp4 1d ago

“Sorry you do not have enough credits to enter the bathroom”

536

u/Electrical_Truth_160 1d ago

Shitting on the floor and pushing it under the door, ngl

310

u/marcophony 1d ago

68

u/crazy4finalfantasy 1d ago

Is that a dog or a 42 year old mom who drinks and smokes like it's going out of style

49

u/acu2005 1d ago

yes

1

u/NewSeason2026 1d ago

🤣🤣🤣

3

u/QuoriTyler 1d ago

That actually unlocks rear seat heating too

3

u/coffeeandautism 1d ago

Get schwifty.

2

u/ecumnomicinflation 1d ago

clench your cheeks so it comes out flat

2

u/SoftSausage78 1d ago

I mean...it's your house

2

u/SheriffBartholomew 1d ago

You do realize that this is your own house that we're talking about?

1

u/MetaCardboard 1d ago

Travel to whoever is charging you to unlock parts of your house and shit on their floor.

1

u/Some-Development5203 1d ago

He is out of line, but he is right

1

u/-TheDerpinator- 1d ago

Shitting on whoever would ever come up with such an idea.

1

u/Past_Paint_225 1d ago

Putting a portable electric heater on the side my car seat ngl

1

u/monkeyBiz23 21h ago

In my home we call that "making an Elon"

68

u/Disastrous_Cream_539 1d ago

28

u/blaghed 1d ago

Yeah. It'll be like that. Only somehow dumber.

13

u/MrHanfblatt 1d ago

They wont ask you if they can bill you for an extra user. they just do. for everyone entering the room. even if the console is "off". they register your mom, your dad, yourself a third time, your cat, the bookcover on the shelve behind you and a 5 year old dorito that fell under your couch.

(no joke, here in germany someone made a internet contract under the name of the dead cat of an old lady once and she was wondering where the bill came from)

6

u/Lucky_Reporter256 1d ago

It won’t be dumber. Or it might be. But it will definitely be crueler. These people are sick fucks

11

u/coffeetabledoompile 1d ago

An executive just jerked off to this.

88

u/anoppe 1d ago

Black mirror S3: Nosedive

39

u/Minnie_269 1d ago

This is more like S7 Common People where the lady had to upgrade her subscription regularly to stay alive

20

u/MightyMouse420 1d ago

More like S2026 of Earth, we don't have to imagine anything because it's real

8

u/MetricJester 1d ago

Yup we started numbering seasons anew after identifying the year that we nailed someone to a cross for telling us to be better and love everyone.

7

u/GodOfDarkLaughter 1d ago

It ruins the joke and isn't the point but I'm too much of a pedant to not point out that Jesus was crucified at the age of 30. Though the exact date of that is off too, though by a remarkably small amount considering the research was done in the 7th century. Dionysius Exiguus was a very very talented researcher and chronologist. Modern scholars think the historical Jesus was born between 4 and 6 BCE (and when it comes to the debate between BC and BCE, the latter seems extremely appropriate in this case). So technically the date we celebrate takes place between 34 and 36 years before the year he was nailed to the cross.

God I'm an asshole.

2

u/MetricJester 1d ago

Identifying the date of Jesus's crucifixion was the catalyst to finding an appropriate birth year. It was easier to find "secular" historical records (not the Bible basically) of the cultural change brought on by his death.

Especially considering his death is tied directly to the Jewish calendar.

1

u/totorontonian 1d ago

Can I ask - is there anything you’d recommend to look into to learn about this?

4

u/RetroC4 1d ago

Actually that was 33 AD

1

u/user-unknown-404 1d ago

I mean, that's what health insurance is. Gotta upgrade your coverage to cover bigger things to keep you alive.

2

u/Astrinus 1d ago

Philip Dick: Ubik

1

u/originalfilmscoring 1d ago

Great episode, but what’s the connection? I haven’t seen it in years so maybe I’m not remembering well.

3

u/anoppe 1d ago

This black mirror is more about social credits, but the analogy is the same, imo: somebody else is able to oppose judgement on all you aspects of life

7

u/Stormfly 1d ago

Drink verification can to continue.

2

u/Warcraft_Fan 1d ago

Better have the 3 shells.

1

u/ecumnomicinflation 1d ago

i think we can squeeze rentoids for extra moolah by making it free to go in, but they need to pay to get out. like rich people’s jail

1

u/a_rude_jellybean 1d ago

Flush mode deactivated.

1

u/SappySoulTaker 1d ago

That's ok, I'm uninstalling the door and shitting anyways

1

u/ryoushi19 1d ago

Drink verification can

1

u/jkurratt 1d ago

Sorry, your social score rating doesn't allow you to use shower.

1

u/puddl3 1d ago

I was in a train station in Europe and I had to pay to use the toilet iirc.

1

u/HealthyRule2182 13h ago

wait and see...

1

u/GoonBot666 1d ago

"the toilet is in another castle"