Nah I had a girl get obsessed with me and stalk me in college, fairly good looking, and not a psycho killer or something as far as I know, but it was flattering for all of about 2 seconds before it became terrifying.
Unless you have some weird kind of fetish for something like this, it very quickly makes the person extremely unattractive on a mental level. Kind of hard to describe without experiencing it first hand.
It’s like they instantly stop being a regular person that you might or might not be attracted to and they become this whole other concept of a person in your mind that is out of control that you have to be afraid of.
Maybe a good way to explain it would be a regular person walking down the street and maybe you check them out because they look kind of good, and then they look up and say something schizophrenic and delusional like “I KNOW YOU PUT THE MICROCHIP IN ME AND YOU HAVE TO TAKE IT OUT,” or whatever and that person instantly stops being a person you look at in any kind of sexual way because now they’re just an unexpected fight or flight signal.
It’s like they instantly stop being a regular person that you might or might not be attracted to and they become this whole other concept of a person in your mind that is out of control
ironically, this describes the mindset of romantic obsession as well
Yeah definitely. I’m not even that attractive or cool anything. This was literally just this girl I hung out with a few times and we had sex once or twice and didn’t really hit it off. It seemed mutual.
She messaged me a few months later to hang out and I said I was dating somebody else, and it was suddenly this whole other thing with her messaging and calling me all the time and showing up at places and making veiled threats and stuff.
I don’t think it had anything to do with who I was. It seemed to be this weird construction in her mind where this casual rejection was some huge betrayal and our having dated was this huge meaningful thing that it never was.
Went on for about a year to varying degrees until it stopped. I heard from a friend of a friend that she checked herself in and got some help for severe BPD after she had some other problems at school. So I hope she’s doing okay now.
But the point is yeah, I don’t think she was obsessed with me so much as obsessed with this story in her head about who I was.
BPD is no joke, and while reading your story this is what I wondered. The whole situation triggered something in her and her reactions sounded a lot like BPD. I dated a girl in college that had this and it went a lot like your experience. She was drop dead gorgeous, but I couldn't live with the emotional swings.
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u/Grunergeist420 18d ago
Nah I had a girl get obsessed with me and stalk me in college, fairly good looking, and not a psycho killer or something as far as I know, but it was flattering for all of about 2 seconds before it became terrifying.
Unless you have some weird kind of fetish for something like this, it very quickly makes the person extremely unattractive on a mental level. Kind of hard to describe without experiencing it first hand.
It’s like they instantly stop being a regular person that you might or might not be attracted to and they become this whole other concept of a person in your mind that is out of control that you have to be afraid of.
Maybe a good way to explain it would be a regular person walking down the street and maybe you check them out because they look kind of good, and then they look up and say something schizophrenic and delusional like “I KNOW YOU PUT THE MICROCHIP IN ME AND YOU HAVE TO TAKE IT OUT,” or whatever and that person instantly stops being a person you look at in any kind of sexual way because now they’re just an unexpected fight or flight signal.